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Sirius traced his fingers over the pale pink skin of a faint scar on his lover’s neck. They were sat outside by the lake; Sirius’s back against a tree, legs spread with Remus laying against his chest, book in his hands. The werewolf had been reading aloud but as he felt soft fingers rubbing at his neck and shoulders he had gradually faded into a light sleep. From the angle he was sat Sirius could see the tip of a scar that was much angrier, raised and red and puffy. Though he couldn’t see it through Remus’s clothes, he knew exactly where it led. He had seen it enough times, traced his fingers over it in the night. Tears in his eyes and whispered apologies on his lips. He thought of it now, raking down under Remus’s shoulder blade and round his rib cage before splitting into three. The three then wrapped their way around the body he loved so much, coming to rest just underneath the heart he had promised to protect forever.
It was not the worst scar Remus had, but it was close. James and Sirius had barely been able to keep the blood from pouring out as Peter ran to get Madame Pomfrey, neither boy wanting to leave their friend though they were arguably faster. James had tried to heal the cuts, pouring all his energy into the spells. While Sirius sat stroking Remus’s hair, holding his hand and begging the skin to sew together. It was little use, magic alone couldn’t heal these wounds, and definitely nothing either boy was capable of yet. Sirius blamed himself, he always did, if only they could do more to help. If only they could do anything to stop the moon as it came and went without a care for the agony it was causing. James had to hold him back as Madame Pomfrey levitated the broken boy up to the castle, crying and begging to be allowed in with his ‘best friend’. She allowed him this time, thinking he would only do more damage to himself if she shut him out.
He sat there next to the lifeless body he loved for days. Nobody could pry him away, always touching. Hands either stroking the hair from his forehead or squeezing his hand, fingertips running over skin. As though he was sure if he let go he might lose the only thing that made life worth living.
When Remus finally opened his eyes, 3 days later, it was Sirius’s cries that alerted Madame Pomfrey to the change in her patient’s condition. She had barely managed to keep the boy alive, blood pouring from his skin as though each vein were a fountain. But she had managed, a combination of dittany and potions she had thought no use for in a school and magic she had not used since her training days was what saved him.
Sirius snapped out of his reverie just as Remus woke, he put his book down and turned to face the raven haired boy behind him, gently smiling. Sirius pressed his lips to those just inches from his face, softly and only for a few seconds. He pulled away, letting the joy he felt show on his face. ‘I love you Rem.’
‘I love you too Siri, so much. Come on lets go to dinner’
The boys stood, packing up their belongings and walked back to the castle, fingers entwined. Sirius thought, not for the first time, that there was only one thing he could do for his boyfriend. He had to become an animagus.