Work Text:
☆彡
Donghyuck sits lazily on the couch upside down, slowly developing a headache from all the blood rushing to his brain. He thinks maybe he’ll get an idea of what to do for the next hour until Mark gets home from work. He thinks maybe he should take a shower and get ready since they plan on going out when Mark comes home, but he feels sluggish and would much rather sink into the plush couch. Usually, he’d find himself helping out the grandmother who owns the florist shop downstairs, but it’s raining down hard today so he doubts she’ll be out watering the pretty flowers and potted plants. Sometimes he’ll walk around the city just for fun, but he doesn’t want to risk catching a cold this week, not when he has a final exam coming up just around the corner.
Though, Donghyuck could afford to miss it. A properly written email without the “Sent on my iPhone” shebang (Professor Seo expects a little more professionalism from his students) and his professor’s tiny, little sweet spot for Donghyuck would be the gateway in to let him take it later if he so wished, but Donghyuck feels more than prepared to take his exam and (hopefully) pass it with flying colors. He’s studied for endless nights throughout the past month and has made an unnecessary amount of flashcards that Mark has tested Donghyuck with. Mark’s pretty sure he’s seen at least two of them under their pillows.
The comedic skit playing on the TV goes in one ear and out the other as Donghyuck dramatically drags out a sigh out of how incredibly bored he is. He sits upright, finally paying attention to the comedian in the blond wig. He laughs when the wig falls off unexpectedly, and in the midst of thinking about what he’d look like with bright, platinum blond hair, the doorknob jiggles along with the jingling of Mark’s keys struggling to unlock the door. Donghyuck changes the channel to some other program, displaying a frustrated woman whose wrist is being held back by the arrogant male lead. He vaguely recognizes the characters from seeing Chenle watch the same episode last week. The younger even recommended him to watch it, but Donghyuck didn’t have the time to check it out. He supposes now could be a good time.
Mark drops his keys in the little ceramic plate Donghyuck made on their second date. He’d taken them to a Color-Me-Mine, then to a small and cozy Thai restaurant where Mark had accidentally spilled his iced water all over Donghyuck. His ears had never burned so red in his entire life, but the younger realized that even though Mark was awfully clumsy and a bit of an airhead, he really liked him. They shared their first kiss that night, and Donghyuck’s chest had blown up in fireworks as he thought about the particular moment over and over while brushing his teeth.
Donghyuck doesn’t bother to look over at his boyfriend who’s toeing off his shoes and comments, “You’re home early.” When he does turn his head however, he’s met with a weak smile that hardly reaches Mark’s tired eyes. Mark takes off his jacket and puts it on the coat rack, walking toward Donghyuck. He plops onto the couch right next to Donghyuck, if not on the younger, and hums into his boyfriend's stomach. The younger chuckles, his fingers running through Mark’s tangled black hair.
“What’s up?” Donghyuck asks, turning down the volume of the TV with his right hand while still treading his fingers through Mark’s hair. He thinks that maybe massaging him could somewhat help, but Mark holds his hand in an attempt to stop him. Mark’s thumb rubs over Donghyuck’s hand instead. He’s still quiet. Finally, the older boy sits up and drops his head onto Donghyuck’s shoulder. He shifts himself under Mark’s heavy head to make it more comfortable for both of them. Something definitely must’ve happened, Donghyuck concludes.
After a short silence, Mark breathes out, “We lost her today.” Donghyuck frowns, grabbing Mark’s right hand. He gives it a little squeeze and rubs his own thumbs on his older boyfriend’s dry hand. It smells like hand sanitizer, like it always does after Mark gets home from the hospital.
Working in the hospital meant there were moments of silence the hospital staff had dedicated to their deceased patients in the depths of their break room every day, the heartwarming welcoming of newborn babies every day, everything that Mark would expect from being in a medical environment every day. Nobody ever said being surrounded by these things all the time was something he’d ever get used to, and Mark understood that—he really did, but he’s sensitive and starts to wonder if he’ll ever get over the exhausting dread that presents itself as inevitable.
“She was only six. She asked for her parents, but they gave up on her. Told us they couldn’t handle taking care of her anymore,” Mark takes a heavy sigh and a tear rolls down his cheek. Donghyuck faces him and wipes it away, caressing his face. Oh, how much it hurt to see Mark like this.
“I told her they’d be there soon, and she smiled while holding onto my finger. Not even my hand, Hyuck. Just my finger. She was so small.” Mark’s voice breaks, and Donghyuck’s heart follows. He doesn’t know what to say yet, but he knows it’s best to just listen.
“She deserved better. I cried on the way home too,” Mark bitterly chuckles and takes back his right hand from Donghyuck’s grip, wiping away the stinging tears that don’t seem to stop.
“I’m sorry—I know we were supposed to meet the others tonight, but I don’t think I’m going. You should still go though, Hyuck.” Mark manages to lightly smile in hopes of encouraging his boyfriend to go out. The younger makes a face of distaste, Mark’s expression displaying slight confusion. It was such a Mark thing to do, to suggest that Donghyuck go out with their friends and have fun without Mark while he’d stay home alone, sulking over the inevitable baggage his job will always heave.
“You’re funny if you think I’m going anywhere tonight. I’ll just call in a rain check, no big deal.” Mark frowns, looking into Donghyuck’s soft brown eyes. They’ve always provided a warm and safe home for him, and he feels guilty.
“No, you haven’t seen the guys in so long, and it’s always been because of me…” Donghyuck furrows his eyebrows, facing Mark directly now. Sure, they’ve bailed on the last two hang-outs with their friends for the past month because of Mark, but it hadn’t been intentional. The first time was because Mark’s grandmother had been admitted to the hospital in an emergency and the second was because Mark had another emergency at the hospital regarding his six-year-old patient. Their friends had been more than understanding about both instances, and Donghyuck doubts they’d force Mark to hang out if they knew the state he was in now.
“I’m not leaving you alone. They’ll understand, and if they make a fuss, I don’t care. I’m going to be here for you and with you, Mark.”
Donghyuck always was the more mature one in their relationship. Though to outsiders, it looked a bit differently. Well, a lot more differently because Donghyuck loved teasing him in public, just for the fun of it. He loved how shy Mark got whenever he got a little too close to his neck or whenever he’d rest his hand on Mark’s knee as they sat next to each other. Mark wasn’t the biggest fan of PDA himself, but when it was just the two of them in their own little safe haven at home, it was a completely different story.
Donghyuck never outright refused Mark’s feeble attempts, mainly at trying to get him to cuddle on the couch. Instead, he’d brush Mark off and get back to whatever he was doing because quite frankly, he had a higher tolerance for those types of things than Mark did. It was like their own little game, trying to see who gave in the fastest that day. However, with Donghyuck who’d been so busy studying for the past few weeks, it was always Mark complaining about being Donghyuck-deprived, whatever that meant. It was humorous on the younger’s behalf, but evidently frustrating on Mark’s.
“You sure?” Mark whispers, staring at their intertwined fingers. Donghyuck’s hands are warm.
“That isn’t even a question worth answering, Mark Lee…” Mark lets out a breathy laugh, leans in and plants a quick peck on Donghyuck’s cold lips. Donghyuck smiles and kisses his nose, placing his head onto Mark’s shoulder. Moments like these were held too dear to their hearts as they soaked it all in.
Mark turns his head to look down at Donghyuck, and just as Mark’s about to lean in to kiss him again, Donghyuck jumps up from the couch and makes his way toward the kitchen. The older whines, his gaze following his boyfriend endearingly.
“Get back here…” Mark mumbles, his chin leaning on the armrest. He looks up at Donghyuck in adoration, admiration really. It felt so right, to be at home with Donghyuck like this. Even when things went wrong outside of their safe haven, Donghyuck always managed to find a way to make him feel like it was okay, that he’d be okay.
Donghyuck pulls out a journal from one of the bottom cabinets, flipping to an all too familiar page that Mark begins to laugh at once he’s recognized it. He gets up from the couch and stands closely next to Donghyuck who’s intently reading the information on the page.
“You’re gonna try and make that tonight?” It was the recipe for Mark’s favorite dish, jajangmyeon. Donghyuck received the recipe from Mark’s mother when they both went to Vancouver for winter break—when Donghyuck met Mark’s family for the first time.
When they came back home, Donghyuck attempted to make the meal for the first time, but it resulted in small flames due to the lack of attention on the burnt chives in the pan. (To be fair, Mark looked really cute that night, and he couldn’t help but get distracted when Mark was chewing on the end of his pen like a total nerd.) He called it quits and refused to even look the stove’s way, his dramatic ass.
“Yeah. Anything to cheer you up,” Donghyuck says smoothly. His words always came out effortlessly without him having to give them much thought. Donghyuck was always honest which only showed how much more he was in love with Mark, to say such things fluidly with ease. Mark hadn’t grown up expressing his emotions and affection too often, so it was rather difficult getting him to open up to anyone, nonetheless Donghyuck. But that was the thing about the younger boy. He was a magnet, pulling in all forces of Mark Lee to him. Even then, Mark couldn’t resist Donghyuck, who resembled such a concept of gravity.
Mark sits on the wooden barstool they’d purchased from IKEA when they first moved in together, his chin in the palms of his hands, propped up on the island. He watched Donghyuck fill up the kettle with water, watched him gather all the kitchen utensils he’d need, watched him do all this—for him.
Donghyuck pauses from chopping up the zucchini and looks at Mark with an endearing glint in his eye, “Get over here and help boil the noodles, loser.”
The rest of their evening was spent preparing their homemade jajangmyeon (Mark thought it might’ve tasted even better than his mom’s, but Donghyuck just scolded him for lying), playing rock-paper-scissors to decide who’d wash the dishes (Donghyuck lost, but the two ended up washing it together anyway while flicking soapy water at each other), and peacefully spooning in bed as they watched the sun disappear and the moon make its grand entrance.
“Will you be okay for tomorrow?” Donghyuck asks, not bothering to look up at Mark who was holding him. The older’s left leg was thrown over Donghyuck’s legs, his arms holding onto the younger softly. Mark breathes in deeply, playing with Donghyuck’s hair.
“I don’t know,” He answers truthfully.
“That’s okay too, you know? You don’t have to be fine now.” Mark hums, continuing to thread his fingers through his boyfriend’s brown hair. Mark was sure this was making Donghyuck fall asleep, unconsciously smiling to himself as he undoes the small knots in Donghyuck’s hair.
“I love you,” Donghyuck whispers. It isn’t his first time saying that, but to Mark, hearing those words would always feel like the first time Donghyuck said them to him. His chest grows warmer and fonder as Donghyuck turns around and grabs Mark’s hand, intertwining their fingers. His large brown eyes look into Mark’s with that same glint from before.
Mark leans in, kissing the side of Donghyuck’s head, “I love you too.” The younger hums contently, turning himself around again with his back to Mark’s chest. He pulls Mark’s arm over his body, hugging him.
And in both their minds, they already knew their ‘I love yous’ didn’t have to be expressed, if not for Mark’s heart beating loudly enough that it was the last thing Donghyuck heard before completely diving into a deep, comfortable slumber in Mark’s arms.