Chapter Text
Joey Bettany sat on the fence, swinging her heels against the wood. It hadn't worked. Going to India to try to create some space between her and Jack Maynard had only put the problem off.
It wasn't that she didn't like him. It was just that... She only liked him. He was solid, he was comforting. But he was a lump. He bored her, and he just felt like... well like a dependable older brother.
A solid lump of comfort. A sensible, safe option.
Joey knew Jem was quite keen on the match. It would keep her nearby, make Jack more likely to stay at the San. Joey wasn't sure what Madge's opinion was, but she had been keen on the trip to India, and she didn't seem to encourage Joey and Jack to be alone, as Jem did.
Joey stuck her hands in the pockets of her dress and gave a deep sigh. The trip had awakened the writer's imagination in her, and with that a yearning to see the world, learn and write about lots of different types of people. She loved the Tirol but the circles she mixed in were so... limited. She still cared about the school, but had outgrown wanting to be there the whole time. The main times she ended up there now were when she needed an excuse to avoid the situation with Jack.
Joey picked at the wood on the fence, lost in thought. If she married Jack she could see herself spending huge amounts of time at the school, but she wanted more out of life than being a doctor's wife, producing children and maybe allowed a study to write in, and to carry on writing.
She wanted more than a solid lump of comfort. She wanted adventure.
Madge looked at her little sister, perched like a child on the fence, streaks of ink on her face. She wasn't a child anymore, and she wasn't happy. Jack wasn't right for her, nor was living at the Sonnalpe or the school anymore.
She needed to explore, to experience life. For all that Madge wanted Joey to stay safe with them, she knew it wasn't right for the girl. The question was where to go. Joey still wasn't strong enough to live in the damp UK full time, and aside from that she became bored there very easily.
Madge went towards Joey, who started, and made to jump off the fence, nearly tearing her dress as she did so.
Madge stifled a smile. "Really Jo! You'll spend all your time mending if you're not careful."
Joey smiled and said. "Well at least I don't have to mend anything this time." then looked at some ink marks on her cuffs. "I do seem likely to be having to do some washing though. Oh bother it. I always do get ink everywhere."
Her sister agreed, then to Joey's suprise, Madge looked around and then swung herself up on the fence like a school girl. She laughed at Joey's face and motioned for her to join her.
"Don't look so shocked Joey-baba. I may have to be careful of what I do now that I am 'Frau Doktor Russell', but that doesn't mean that I forget what fun it is to sit on the fence and swing your heels once in a while."
Joey grinned and joined her sister.
"Joey I want to talk to you" Madge began.
Joey jumped in, and straight to the wrong conclusion.
"Oh Madge! You aren't 'busy' again are you? I overheard you say you might like more children soon."
This threw Madge off course rather. She denied being pregnant rather vehemently, and made a mental note to discuss some other terms than 'busy' with Jo before she continued with the original conversation.
"Joey, we need to talk about something. You know you always have a home with us," she said.
Joey nodded, wondering where this was leading. Madge went on.
"I don't want to pry into the situation with you and Jack..."
The way Joey's body sagged and her shoulders dropped gave Madge all the answer she needed. She decided to be more abrupt than she had intended.
"I don't think he's right for you."
Joey was hugely surprised, having been expecting the opposite. A tiny part of her she called 'my devil' almost found Jack more attractive because of the disapproval. But the bigger part of her felt a huge sense of relief. She realised Madge was still talking.
" ... but the way things are Joey, you're getting close to playing 'fast and loose' with him. He's a good man, he doesn't deserve that."
Joey looked shocked.
"But I wouldn't want to be like that Madge. Not at all. I do care for Jack, but ... Well that's all. I care but I don't ... well, er, love him" she said, looking anywhere but at Madge. It wasnt really natural to her to discuss this sort of thing with her sister.
"Well then it's quite right that you don't marry him." said Madge. "But I don't think Jack is the only problem, is he?"
Joey stayed silent. She wasn't sure what to say, how to explain without sounding ungrateful for the loving home she had.
Madge gave her some time then started the discussion herself.
"I think you need a new challenge Jo. So what do you think you want to do? Go to university, to somewhere like the Sorbonne with Simone, or to Oxford?"
Jo responded immediately. "Oh no, not the Sorbonne with Simone! If we were there together alone she wouldn't be able to help going all soppy over me again. She would be jealous of my friends and ... Oh it just wouldn't work. I don't think I want to study any more either really, I enjoy my freedom to write too much to settle down to something like that"
Madge considered for a moment.
"Well what about your original plan, to go to Elisaveta's court as lady in waiting?" she said. She was fairly sure she knew the answer but interested to see what Joey would say.
"Vita doesn't need me, and I would go mad having to be prim and proper all day. No, I ... Oh it just sounds silly Madge, but I want to explore, watch how people react, meet new people. Does that make sense?"
Madge nodded.
"It makes a lot of sense Joey. You spent so much of your childhood travelling, we've always been a family who like to go to new places and see new things. The real decision now is where and how. Have you any idea where you want to go? "
Joey had many ideas, not all of them practical. They discussed things a little more and then set off to the house, with Joey's future still unresolved.
---
Madge knocked on the door of Jem's study and entered. Her husband looked up from his paperwork with a smile.
"Hello, is it lunch time already?" he said, grabbing hold of Madge's hand and standing to pull her towards him.
Madge laughed and put her arms around his waist.
"No, it's only 11, but I wanted to talk to you about something."
Jem listened quietly while she explained. He was slightly disappointed, as he liked Jack Maynard a lot. Since Jo had to grow up, he wanted her protected and looked after. But he also knew that Madge understood her little sister very well, so if she said there was no hope of her and Jack becoming an item, then he would accept it.
"This may well be a good thing, Madge," he replied as she drew to an end. "I'm worried about the situation in Austria, and so it seems are Flower and Lannis. Flower has decided to return to America for a while and he is to escort Evadane, as well as his own Cornelia. I can ask him to take Jo with them. Then she will be safely away if we need to move from here quickly."
"Jem! Do you really think that will be necessary?" said Madge in concern, forgetting about Jo's exploring for a moment "Do you think I should close the school?"
"Not close it, at least not right now" he said "But if things don't improve then I'm thinking we may need to move it to the Sonnalpe, so we at the San can keep you all under our protection. Not quite yet; there's no point in inviting trouble. But we need to be prepared in case it becomes necessary"
They left the topic of Jack and Joey, and focussed on the logistics of how they might move the school if the situation didn't approve.
---
Jack Maynard wandered along the mountain path, lost in thought. He was still trying to work out how he felt about his recent conversation with Joey.
"I want you to stop thinking there is a chance for us, Jack. I really do care for you, but ... like an older brother" she said, each word digging deeper into him. "It wouldn't be right for either of us. You deserve someone who will love you properly."
He had cut short the discussion, not able to trust his reactions. He was tempted to try to change her mind, but he still had his pride. Also, if he was honest, he knew deep down that she was right.
He'd already found himself burying himself in work to cope with her lack of response to his courtship. Did he really want a lifetime of hiding at work to avoid the realisation that the relationship was all one sided?
No he didn't. He would see Joey off on her travels and wish her well.
In some ways, finally making that break made him feel lighter, almost happier. He had wanted Joey for so long. Now he realised it was an idealised Joey he wanted, not this flesh and blood woman who didn't love him back. He had wanted to be part of the happy family at Die Rosen so much that he had set Joey on a pedestal that she was determined to jump off.
It would take time, but he would heal, and in some ways he would be glad not to have to be second best to her writing.