Chapter Text
She stared idly at the wooden boards about a metre above her head. She had traced the varied tones of the panels for about an hour now. That one beige, that one chestnut in colour, that one cinnamon, chocolate, coffee, copper, bay, mahogany, tan, toast and sepia. Who knew her young mind could conjure different ways to say brown.
This is what her life had come to.
After five gorgeous years travelling with her beloved across galaxies and milky ways, she found herself blas é and spiritless. She hadn’t left her room for weeks. Jim had popped in and out, but she merely shrugged and sighed. He left her food. She ate only the top layer. He left her gifts. They remained unopened. He leant to kiss her. She turned away. If she were the star from Stardust, she would be the dust remnants of Yvaine’s hair when Triston crossed the wall. Her wildfire essence had been vanquished.
There was nowhere left to explore.
They have covered every map, every chart- chatted to every astrologer and earth wanderer they dare meet. Nada. Nothing. Nil. Zippity split. They had crossed all of land and sea, visited every village, town, city, country, world, universe that they could fathom. They had sat under the dance of a thousand suns and under fir trees at christmas. They had travelled by tandem and magic carpet. They had done it all. They had completed the world. And in response, Melody felt nothing. No pride, not joy, no love. She had fallen into a pit of unknowing, where she felt like she was trying to grab something that just wouldn’t stop moving. Only a few times was somebody able to pull her out of this chapter, for either good or bad. One such time was when Jim suggested ‘settling down’. Who could have guessed he would be the one to initiate it? He had looked at her expectantly after he uttered the shy and ever hopeful words. These words however provoked and kindled a fuse which had lay dormant throughout her worrisome post travel blues.
It was now fully awake.
He would have kept his trap shut had he known the reaction he would get. Since then he could be found hiding in his room...
**
“Nice one Jim.” Melody’s voice was empty, bar the clipped sarcasm that caught a hold of the end of her sentence. She had been doing that a lot to me recently. Putting me down, and calling me out.
“I’m being serious.” I said, firmer, but still gentle enough that I sounded much like my former 15 year old self. Ah my solar surfing days.
“You’re not being serious. If you were then you wouldn’t even be saying that.” All that emptiness filled quickly with a drip dropping flow of disappointment and resentment. “I mean really Jim, really? You want me to pull one like my mother and settle down, be a good girl and have your kid? Trade my choice of a tail for a life wired in commitment and sacrifice and discontent?”
“I didn’t say that Melody. You know I didn’t mean it like that.”
“You didn’t have to say it! I know what you meant. You mean what every other God damn person here means. When are you- woman- going to fulfil your life's destiny and have a child?” Melody adopted a high pitched, mock mother voice, “When is your life going to be complete?” And now dropping back into her rasping why were you born voice. “When you force out another damn human!!”
Melody’s face had reddened considerably, and I realised before I even bothered defending myself again that my conker in our metaphorical battle had already been hacked out of my hand and stamped violently into the cobbled floor beneath. I didn’t bother answering her. Instead I turned and walked back to my room. She hadn’t slept in there with me for a week now. I could hear her hollering for me to stop, how rude I was to walk away.
I didn’t look back.
**
Melody was not her mother. True, she had loved Jim with the same fervour that Ariel had loved Eric, but Ariel was happy to stop. She was happy to give up her time for a child. Melody was not. Melody didn’t want to entertain the idea anymore than Marlin wanted to entertain the presence of a jellyfish. Now, apparently, at twenty six it was her duty to fill her womb with new life.
However, since that day where she snapped at Jim, Melody had softened to the idea. Not of childbirth- but of making some kind of new life with Jim. A different form of adventure. An adventure right here, at the place she used to call home. Melody blinked and turned away from the super exciting ceiling. Another sigh found its way from her mouth. But for the first time it wasn’t purely exasperation, it was a decision. She would go down to Jim’s room and talk to him. He hadn’t been in to her yet this morning, so it might be a pleasant surprise.
She swung her legs around and pushed her feet into the floor. She felt mildly wobbly when she stood up, but didn’t pay it any mind. That’s what you get for remaining flat for long periods of time. Once steadied, Melody walked boldly along the corridor that leads from her room to his. Only once she was inches away from knocking on his door did she pause.
Melody hadn’t seen Jim since their argument. What if he didn’t want to see her? Don’t be silly . She assured herself. Jim loves you and is probably ready to make a situation right. It’s not like this was their first argument. Their first one was in their second month of travelling…
**
“Melody!?”
I didn’t hear Jim say my name. If I had I would’ve responded. All I could hear were the noiseless voices chiming in my mind, born from the pages on the book in my hands
‘Can I be your husband? No. Why? …
Marnie smiled, and placed the circle of daisies across Raven’s dark hair.
You are better than a husband.’*
What I did hear afterwards though was the aggressive clanging of the crockery on the wall. It clattered onto the floor and the sound echoed around the small kitchen space. I looked up from my book to see Jim flushed and cursing.. His fringe was wetted against his forehead, hands holding the next victim to his anger.
“Jim?”
“Oh now you listen!” Jim snapped. I had never heard such scorn in his voice before. I inadvertently shrank back in my chair.
“What’s wrong?” My voice had a quiver.
“Candles Melody! Candles! I have told you time and time again that we cannot leave them burning. I was just downstairs and one had almost burnt to the table! We are so not going to live if the ship burns! Why can’t you understand that!” Jim had taken to pacing around the kitchen, hands whipping around the space while he spoke. I could almost hear the poor spoon crying in fear.
In fairness he had mentioned it a lot to me, but one needn’t think of candles in her underwater palace. As for my time spent as a human, no one trusted me with one anyway. Probably for this exact reason.
“I’m sorry Jim.” I uttered, not that he could hear me.
“Do you want to kill us all?”
“Jim-”
“Is that what you’re really here for? To be my demise?!”
“Jim just listen-”
“To bring about the end of Jim Hawkins!”
“Jim shut up!” That shut him up. I always surprised myself how loud I could yell. He turned to me, eyes wide through his stupid gorgeous loose fringe. I went to him, grasping either side of his face in my hands. I held him tightly so his cheeks squished together slightly and his mouth went pouty. I would’ve laughed or kissed him in another situation.
“I forgot. I forget! I am human. I am not planning your demise, although if you keep yelling at me then I may well have to. I told you not to give me a candle. You chose to give me one- no! Pah pah!” Jim opened his mouth to respond but I squished it shut. He writhed a little under my hands. I sighed. I lowered my voice.
“You don’t get to talk to me like that.” I dropped my hands. “Ever.” He looked away, face drooping slightly. “I said I’m sorry.” I said. Still he avoided my eyes.
I put my index finger to his chin and tilted his head up.
“I’m sorry too.” He said. I smiled.
“I know.” I replied.
**
Melody knocked twice on the door. Nothing. She knocked again. Nothing. After the third time Melody gently called his name, and slowly edged the door open. She kept pushing slowly until she could fit her head in the gap and peep her eyes around.
Oh.
The room was empty. His bed was made, but so creaseless that he clearly hadn’t been sleeping in it. Melody pushed the door fully open and stepped inside. She used the heel of her foot to flick the door closed behind her. There was a dull washed yellow light in the room, the weathered blinds filtering the light into a hazy gaze. His bed was below the window, and on checking underneath found his overnight bag still neatly folded under. His book shelf to the left of his bed was untouched, apart from a couple of dust free novels he read on repeat. His clothes drawers on the opposite side of the room showed no signs of change. Melody’s eyes shuffled around the room from under her frown. So, he definitely hadn’t gone away, or... at least not planned to.
No Melody .
If she had learnt one thing from travelling, it was to keep your head. She paused her thought process before it had a chance to spiral into Jim’s damnation. Logical thinking . She took a mental note of the layout of the room and then went back into the corridor. She wandered around the halls, pushing down and into herself the queasy feeling that was setting in.
At last she saw Grimsby. She exchanged a few quiet words with him, but unfortunately he had neither heard nor seen Jim since, well , their ‘settling down’ argument. Melody thanked him and continued around the corridor. She came to the kitchen where Louis was singing to himself as always. He too hadn’t seen Jim within the last couple of days. As Melody went around the halls, it became far more difficult to subdue the rising feeling of horror. It began clasping at her lungs, forming a lump which pressed against the inside of her ribcage. She felt like oxygen was slowly diserting her. While this happened Melody’s pace increased, until she was practically running through the hallways calling for Jim.
All of a sudden Melody stopped running, her lungs crying at her to rest. She leant a quivering hand on the wall, the other holding onto her tummy. She took three unsteady breaths. From the fourth breath onwards her intakes and exhales calmed, but what remained was a tentative wheeze.
She needed to think. His solar surfer. He still kept it, she was sure. But where? And then: where would he go?
Melody headed to the library. Once there she began scanning the books with the kind of speed precision that only blesses us once every blue moon. She pulled out every atlas, every constellation and space book she could find. She flicked through the pages faster than a mother penguin hoisting her body up bank, away from prying sea lions. As she went she jotted numerous numbers and words on a pad of scrap paper. Not ten minutes before she entered the library was she away again, calling Grimsby’s name. Once he reappeared she asked him something, he nodded and she proceeded to her bedroom. There she put a small selection of clothes in a weekend bag, along with her miniature tool kit.
By the time Melody had accumulated a few things and alerted the police force, Grimsby had speed walked to the local Swim Yourself Merry (tavern and swimming baths combined), where he knew Tip, Dash, B.E.N and Morph would be staying. They all got along swimmingly (haw haw), and had been the core of the sailing crew that accompanied Melody and Jim on their journey’s. Scuttle, Dr Doppler and Cpt. Amelia had sporadically come and go- but what with lounging and or child watching to do, they couldn’t be expected to stay.
Grimsby told them of Jim’s disappearance, and all four of them had hoisted themselves off the deck chairs and out of the pool quicker than you can say “under the sea”. They followed Grimsby to the vessel which had been moored since their return.
Melody was already aboard. When she heard the heightened chattering of her friends, she dropped what she was doing and ran across the deck to meet them. Tip and Dash were in front, and had they been as weak as average penguins and walruses, then they would have been thrown backwards by the force of Melody’s run and hug. But hark, they are adventurers slash explorers- with courage and strength to match an army of men.
So it was that when the overcome Melody embraced them, they held her tightly back.