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Taehyung is tired. It's been a very long day at work, what with him having to cover up for one of the sick part timer's shifts, and he thinks if he hears someone asks him for a vanilla latte one more time he will…
He will make it and smile dutifully but maybe he won't tell them to have a good day.
Okay, that's too mean, he would never do that. But the thought is here.
Seokjin was graceful enough to tell him he'll close the café, so he could leave at 6:30 pm instead of 7 pm. Which is nice of him, because he's been there since 9 am, just one hour after Taehyung, who came at 8 am, but since Seokjin is the boss, Taehyung figures it's more of his duty at this point, as much as it is compassion for his tired worker and friend.
Whatever the reason is, he is still thankful for these 30 minutes. It's a short walk to his apartment, so it's fine, and the weather is nice, warm but not overly so on this sweet day of May. The elevator is not out of service anymore (since two days ago) thankfully, because there is nothing he loathes more than the forced exercising that consists of him walking up the stairs to the 8th floor.
He is so ready to crash on his bed and not move for as long as his stomach - or Latte, his fat calico disaster of a cat - will allow him to because he is just so fucking tired.
Which is why, when he opens the door and walks into his apartment, he doesn't notice that something is terribly amiss. He automatically closes the door as he announces "Honey, I'm home" loudly to his cat (who does not care one bit) as he usually does.
He has his shoes kicked off and he is walking in the living room mindlessly when he hears a shy "welcome home?". It takes him a few hot seconds to realise that, as it does not appear that Latte did suddenly learned how to speak, there is someone in his apartment.
He blinks, exhaustion suddenly seeping out of his body as his head snaps to the left where the voice came from.
There, next to his tall shelf, on his tippy toes, stands his neighbour, Min Yoongi. He is wearing a long black t-shirt with Jiji the cat from Kiki's Delivery Service on it that makes it seem like it's all he is wearing, pale skinny legs exposed for the world to admire. Taehyung does admire them for a while too long before he realises his neighbour should definitely not be in his apartment right now.
Taehyung stares at him up and down until a loud mewl draws his attention to the top of his shelf where, of course, sits Latte, proud and tall and with a string hanging off the shelf that Taehyung cannot identify.
Taehyung looks in between them.
"I can explain," Yoongi says quickly, finally retracting his arm that wasn't even reaching Latte's agitated tail.
"I sure hope you can," Taehyung answers back, blinking at the sheer absurdity of the situation. He doesn't know Min Yoongi very well, but he is pretty sure his quiet, broody neighbour who wears black from head to toes even in the middle of summer isn't the type to break into someone's place to traumatise their cat.
"Your terrasse's door was open," is the first thing Yoongi says, cheeks turning a pretty crimson as he tries to pull his shirt down, either from embarrassment or just to do something with his hands.
Taehyung's eyebrows rise to his hairline. "So… You broke into my apartment because the door was open."
Yoongi seems to realise his mistake, eyes opening wide, and Taehyung can't help but notice how fucking cute he is. Which he noticed the second he moved in and Yoongi came to introduce himself, but never had the occasion to really dwell further into it.
Because Yoongi is quiet and rarely ever leaves his house. He plays the piano sometimes, but never late or too early, and he doesn't seem to have much company. Since he is the perfect neighbour, Taehyung really has no occasions to see him.
So, really, this is the first time he gets a good, proper look at his neighbour, and that's because he broke into his house.
"I didn't-... Well, I guess I did," he concedes very quickly, a slight pout to his plush lips. "But that's because you cat broke into mine first!" he exclaims quietly, which Taehyung didn't think was possible but is, apparently.
Taehyung looks up at his cat who is licking at his paw with clear disinterest. Well, he wouldn't put it above him. Latte is a fiend (but the loveliest fiend ever for whom Taehyung would die) who will stop at nothing to get food. He supposes he could have gone into Yoongi's place looking for food since Taehyung had to put him on a diet after the vet called him 'very round', but in medical terms.
That's possible, but doesn't explain why Yoongi had to come all the way into his place to chase him away.
"I'm sorry if he did," Taehyung rubs at his neck with one hand, looking back at Yoongi. "But why did you?"
His neighbour gets even redder. "He. Uh. He stole something from me."
Taehyung arches an eyebrow. "And you couldn't wait until I came back home? I would have given it back to you. There was no need to climb over the wall of the terrasse and break in."
Because the effort and the risks of falling off the 8th floor was really not worth it for something Taehyung could have just handed back to him when he came back.
Yoongi looks up at Latte, a look of longing on his face as if he is thinking about jumping to get his thing back so he can run out of Taehyung's place and never speak to him again. Taehyung can even see his hand go up before resignation comes over his pretty face. He sighs very loudly and turns back to him, defeated.
"It's… Well. It's quite an embarrassing object," he says, eyes shaking, pulling down his shirt. It's a terrible move if he wants to hide his legs, because it does nothing but draw Taehyung's attention back to them.
"What is it? Underwear?" Taehyung wonders, squinting to try and see what his cat had gotten with him up there. Right this moment, Latte decides it's playtime, and with one powerful paw move, he yeets the object away, right Taehyung's way, who catches it because he has superhuman reflexes and big hands.
He catches the string easily, and looks at the dangling bits as Yoongi squeals loudly. He snatches it out of Taehyung's hand and turns his back to him while muttering obscenities. When he turns back toward him, hand behind his back, Taehyung is in the same position, mouth agape, processing what he has seen.
"Tell me you didn't see what it is," Yoongi utters breathlessly.
Taehyung stares a while longer and finally manages to close his mouth, red blooming on his own cheeks. He saw. He saw very clearly the small contraception.
"Do you want me to lie, or-..."
Yoongi squeals again. "Oh my god. Oh. My. God."
"It's okay, it's not… It's normal to have.. This kind of material… I mean, pleasure is very import-..."
"Please, shut up. Please," Yoongi pleads, eyes shiny, his whole face red like a ripe tomato.
"What I mean is," Taehyung says and Yoongi glares at him, but it's too late, he is already speaking again. "It's nothing to be embarrassed of. I myself have…"
Yoongi throws himself at him to slam his hand on his mouth. He looks so beautiful up close that Taehyung is rendered speechless all the same, big hand on his mouth or not.
"Shh. Not a word," he instructs, not sounding very intimidating at all despite his deep voice. "Just… Just forget this happened."
Taehyung does not think he can do that, but he nods all the same so Yoongi steps away from him because his body warmth is very distracting.
"Good," Yoongi says as he lets go, one arm still held behind his back to hide the offending object. "Now I'll.. I'll go back to my place and.... We'll just be back to normal. I'll close my terrasse door forever and it'll be fine," he continues, speaking fast and high. He looks so cute with his messy black hair and red cheeks that Taehyung suddenly has no control over his tongue.
"You're very cute," he blurts out, and horror barely has the time to make its way to his brain as Yoongi stares at him with wide eyes and his mouth slightly open.
"I… Thank you?" It appears it didn't quite make it to Yoongi's brain either.
Well, while they're on that no brain allowed moment. "Do you want to grab a drink sometimes?" he asks, mouth moving and brain not thinking anything aside from very cute, super cute, the cutest, totally wanna smooch.
"Sure," Yoongi answers easily, blinking like his mind is screaming at him but he isn't quite sure why.
Latte choses this moment to jump on his desk, the loud noise of his fat body weight slamming on the wooden surface snapping them both out of their weird transe. Yoongi is a little less red now, but still as cute as he looks at Latte making his way to the couch.
He seems to remember his initial predicament suddenly as Taehyung can see his body tense, his attention snapping back to him.
"I… I better go," he says, and Taehyung wants nothing more than to tell him to stay, but he is very tired and he probably looks like he's been through a hurricane. Yoongi doesn't look much better, even if Taehyung is pretty sure he'd look cute even after a week of allnighters. Now isn't a good time.
"Sure," he tells him, and kindly walks him to the door in perfect silence. In front of it, with his hand on the handle, Yoongi seems to get second thoughts as he quickly turns to him, a slight frown on his face, determination in his eyes.
"About that drink…" he trails off, eyes shaking again, a shyness that Taehyung didn't know he had in him on the tip of his lips. He seems to get a hold of himself though, because he soon looks at Taehyung right in the eyes. "Ask me again tomorrow." There is a slight smile to his lips before he opens the door, Taehyung staring at him absolutely dumbfounded.
Yoongi turns one last time, grinning wider. "Oh, and, by the way. Don't worry - the toy was clean."
He closes the door on that, leaving Taehyung breathless.
He makes his way back to the living room and lets his body drop on the couch as he stares ahead blankly. Latte comes to sit on his lap, purring like a madman. Exhaustion catches up to him first, then, the realisation.
"I've got a date," Taehyung tells his cat as he starts to pet him with enthusiasm, a slight smile making its way to his lips, giddiness spreading in his body. "You got me a date, you absolute champion.
Latte mewls at him like he knows exactly what he did and wants chicken for his hard work.
Taehyung thinks he deserves at least that, and an award.
The next day, when Yoongi opens his door, perfectly styled in black from head to toe, a soft grin on his pretty pink lips, a slight blush on his cheeks, looking like the sweetest dream to have ever been dreamed, Taehyung decides Latte deserves a whole fucking moutain of beef for his efforts.
(And, just a few years later, carried by a very sullen looking Seokjin whose best man position got stolen by a cat, Latte is the one who delivers the wedding bands - because it's only right, as the best wingman in history.)