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Kallus sighed, glancing at himself in the bathroom mirror. He did not quite like what he saw- a sad looking ginger boy with mutton chops and red eyes. The toilet was extremely close to him and although he had not consumed any alcoholic drink, Kallus felt the urge to go over and cough chunks in the porcelain bowl.
He could hear everyone having fun outside. He knew, he knew… what? That Zeb was there, with his new friends? That Zeb did not care about him anymore? That they were broken up? Broken up, yes. And now, Kallus was lost… so lost. He languished for hours, thinking of nothing but Zeb after their break-up. Now he was at a party, hiding in the bathroom. All because of a purple man named Zeb. Well, Kallus sighed inwardly. I suppose that this is better than pretending to fake text. Peeing is superior, anyway. Real men pee, not check their phones like sissys.
Why did he come to this party, anyway? Popular boy Kanan Jarrus was hosting it and Kanan despised him! The feeling was mutual, especially since Kallus suspected that Kanan had a hand in his and Zeb’s break-up. Yes, Kanan had a boyfriend; Kallus, though, had always suspected that Kanan harbored a flame for his Zeb.
Zeb… Zeb was great. Kind, funny, snarky, and purple- everything that Kallus could want in a man. Kallus found himself wishing that he were in the den, making out with Zeb, instead of here in the bathroom. The bathroom was so lonely. Kallus was so lonely. All he could think about was Zeb, but he knew that Zeb was not thinking of him. No- their history was being erased as Kallus took a piss. The pee went into the toilet bowl with a splash. It reminded Kallus of the way Zeb cannonballed in the water on their second date at the lake. Hmm, Kallus thought. Why is my pee yellow? Perhaps he was dehydrated.
Kallus turned the tap on and began to drink from it like a wild animal. Beyond the bathroom door, he could hear Kanan singing a drunken rendition of Whitney Houston’s I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me). Kanan was a shit singer, Kallus thought with a sneer. It was then that he heard another voice join in… Zeb’s.
Typically, Kallus and Zeb would make fun of drunk singers together at parties. It appeared that the tables were now turned, and not in Kallus’ favor. Kallus could not help it- he began to cry like he did on the day he was born, stark naked and with no one to love him. He supposed that this was not so different.
Knock knock. Someone rapted on the bathroom door, causing Kallus to jump six feet in the air. He was a track star, an expert at high jump. “Anyone there? I need to take a shit,” the voice said. It sounded familiar, but Kallus did not have time to think about it.
“No,” he said, his voice a low whisper. “You can’t come in.”
“What?” The voice responded. It sounded anxious. “Man, just open up.”
Kallus felt himself on the verge of a nervous breakdown. He knew that people would begin to shout soon- the bathroom was a truly coveted place when it came to parties. He made a huge mistake showing up. Kallus took a deep breath.
“Okay, okay,” he said. He went to open up the door. But… he did not hear knocking anymore. “Fuck!” He shouted, kicking at the toilet. Water began to spray out, then piss and shit along with it. Kallus cried. At least he did not have to clean up.
Kallus wished many things in that moment. He wished that he had never shown up. He wished that he was with Zeb right then, cuddling and bullying drunk party-goers. He wished that he was at home instead, watching hot guys on the local cable porn network. He wished that he was never born.
The ginger knew what others thought about him. Before he and Zeb began dating, he was called many things: loser, loner, stoner, you name it.
Karabast. Maybe he was a loser. After all, he was flying solo at a party. Worse, he was in a bathroom, crying over a purple man and surrounded by the feces of others.
Awesome party, Kallus thought. I’m so glad I came.