Work Text:
The marble floor in the throne room was really hard. If you kneeled there for a longer than couple of minutes, you would feel pain despite wearing Surplice. It wasn’t like that floor was made for suffering, no. But kneeling in front of a God, one had to know the real weight of their duties and destiny. Hades was not as merciless as to let his Specters kneel there for too long; besides, his orders were mostly given to Pandora anyway.
She was like a link between himself and them, a commander, and even though Hades was not agreeing with every single order of hers, the army didn’t need to know that. Otherwise, they might started doubting either her or the God. The Underworld peace was something Hades wouldn’t really like to sacrifice only to boost his ego.
Bennu Kagaho was not under Pandora’s orders, though.
Bennu Kagaho has been kneeling in front of him for almost an hour now, and the last time they exchanged words was more than half an hour ago already. He didn’t look at the God, and Hades didn’t look at him, either. Silence that filled the room was heavy, like the invisible dust settled down on one’s lungs, playing tricks to make breathing harder.
Kagaho waited. Even despite knowing Hades relatively well, he couldn’t say what the God was thinking about and whether he was thinking about anything at all.
A long time passed.
A long time was not a clear concept, though. To some, it was merely a couple of weeks. To others, years. Yet between their last meetings passed more than 500 of years. Two long Holy Wars and two long slumbers. When it came to people, Kagaho knew they were changing due to their experiences and time. He wasn’t sure, though, if that applied equally to Gods.
What he knew, however, was that Hades appearance in this vessel was quite foreign to him. He couldn’t really tell who the boy was in his previous life; there were no hints such as clothes to base his observations on. His features were angelic, though. Eyes sky-blue, like during that mid-summer time when the sun was shining the brightest and warmest. His skin was milk-white, but looking rather healthy. Cheekbones, well defined, were giving him more mature look; he supposed Hades’ vessel in this era was older than usually. Perhaps, he could have given him 18 or 19 years old. Two long, raven-shaped earrings hanged from his ears. Only the hair color was a mystery to Kagaho. He remembered the last time Alone’s hair changed their color from blonde to black, thus he thought it was always the case. But Hades hair now was completely silver, shining like the sheath of a pearl. Small curls were forming on his shoulders and Kagaho was pretty sure there was a pin keeping the messy locks on place.
It was improper to look at the God for too long, though, so Kagaho only recalled that image again and again in his head.
That body was so much different from Hades’ real one, sleeping in Elysion. The Specter wondered what was the cause of that sudden change, yet at the same time he knew he was unworthy of answers. He wasn’t even sure if there was still a place for him in Hades’ army.
Spending last 500 of years by the side of his brother, dead, was an experience enough to fix his soul.
Kagaho still remembered seed the Gold Saints planted within him. That he wasn’t truly bad, was he? In fact, his only objective back then was to serve and protect Alone. The boy was so similar to his brother, after all… As if Sui reborned, even though that thought itself was absurd.
For a long while, when he was put in between Hades and Alone, he wasn’t sure which one should he choose. Alone was pure and innocent. He needed protection, he needed to be heard, because was his view on salvation any different than Hades’? The only wrong thing he did was to cause the God so many troubles.
Yet, on the other side was Hades. Hades who has never really done anything wrong to him. In fact, despite his… Extravagant personality, he treated Kagaho with as much respect as God could have had for his soldier. Sometimes, Kagaho noticed worry in his eyes. Sometimes, when Hades was really angry, only Kagaho was able to talk him down. Did God needed him? He couldn’t tell.
Kagaho has never regretted that he had chosen Alone, despite knowing about the boy’s scheme since the very beginning. But sometimes, in that deadly slumber, Kagaho’s soul yearned for Hades. He was tied to him, after all. He really wanted to protect him.
Kagaho wasn’t bad, but neither was Hades.
After 500 of years, he was ready to revive with other Specters and meet his God again.
He feared nothing, truly. Yet when he stepped into Hades’ throne chamber for the first time, to greet newly awakened God, he was a little scared. His life as a Specter ended up far away from victory. He had given up on many of his promises. Most of all, he gave up on the promise of keeping Hades safe. Pandora almost stabbed him with her trident, but he wasn’t surprised. Pandora never liked him, really. In her opinion, Kagaho was taking away her position at the God’s side.
“Pandora, if you kill him now, Lord Hades will still need to lose his cosmos on reviving him, what is the use?” Hypnos’ voice was filled with mockery, it was almost like he tried to dare her to do it. Yet, knowing it would only upset Hades, she eventually gave up.
Kagaho was never a social person. Thus, again, he went to greet Hades by himself.
“What are you still kneeling here for?” the voice pulled him out of his thoughts and Kagaho dared to look up. It took seconds, he bowed back right away.
“Go attend someone to observe the skies. Rhadamanthys has enough duties to take care of that. Let me know what was your choice later.”
“Yes, Lord Hades.” Kagaho got up, almost dazed with surprise. The last thing he had expected from the Emperor was to forgive him this effortlessly. After all, he could have named his behavior only in negatives: he disobeyed, betrayed, humiliated, tricked… Even if he believed that was the right thing to do, he still held awareness of how unfair that was to Hades. Yet, the God acted like nothing had happened. Like it wasn’t two Holy Wars before.
While at the door, Kagaho turned to Hades once more. He kneeled, for the last time and quickly left the chamber. He had duties to fulfill, after all.
Despite gossips and different opinions, Hades was a merciful God. He had a sense of justice, even though mortals saw it as something twisted and against them. Hades was, however, in no means a villain.
He thought that after centuries of being alive and reborn, no personal feelings blinded his judgement. Only now was he realizing his walls crumbled a long time ago; with the moment he had seen Kagaho for the first time.
If the Specter didn’t die during that Holy War, perhaps Hades would not be this forgiving. Perhaps he would have stabbed him dead himself, cursing his soul and destroying his aligned star.
Over the decades, his demeanor softened a little. He still didn’t think Kagaho should have betrayed him. He still grew bitter at the memory of that maleficence and Alone still made him nothing but enraged. But… It was very lonely in the Underworld without Kagaho.
Once you tasted something, it would be difficult to completely let go of it.Sometimes your mind would still wander there, reminiscing the texture, the smell, the flavor on your tongue.
Hades thought nostalgy was only typical for humans, yet he had still fallen in its trap in the moment he least predicted that. Obviously, he could have blamed it on the fact he lowered his guard too much and let himself be lured by beautiful promises that never ended up fulfilled. He could have blamed it on his vessel being fond of Kagaho and of mutual feelings similar to brotherhood between them. Deep inside, though, Hades knew he lowered his walls only because he wanted to.
Because Kagaho was so much different.
When he was absent, Pandora took her spot by his side with pride, clearly glad no one was disturbing her anymore. She couldn’t really understand why Hades was so upset for the first couple of days; the tea she brought him didn’t taste like he remembered. The robes she prepared weren’t soft and warm enough, the water in the bath was always not right. Even the way she was talking was different. Hades easily grasped the idea what he was yearning for. Then, he became indifferent and at least tried to pretend he wasn’t this moody anymore. It still slipped, from time to time. He yelled at Hypnos for wanting to keep him company in the Elysion. He threw books Thanatos picked for him all over his throne chamber. He scolded Cerberus for resting its head on his lap.
They thought it was normal; Hades was very moody in general. Only the God knew what caused that. Or, the lack of what caused that.
When you are Lord of the Underworld, death does not have any impact on you anymore.
It was Hades case, really. Death was either a salvation on punishment, depending who it touched. Comparing to humans, he has never seen it as anything scary, or terrible.
When everything you touch dies, you understand this is what you will be surrounded for your whole life.
Hades has never despised darkness, neither he preferred Elysion over Underworld. The bright sun was hurting his eyes, fragrance of flowers was so intense it was making him sick. And those bothersome nymphs. He had no idea how Hypnos and Thanatos could spend days on no end there.
Hades liked his rich and small temple in the Underworld. Shadows were comforting and familiar. And, his Specters were quite a good entertainment when he needed it. Elysion was lonely. Underworld became lonely when Kagaho wasn’t there anymore.
Longing. What a strange concept was that. What absolutely ungodly, degrading and weak concept was that. How humiliated Hades felt when he realized he missed Kagaho. He was so enraged that for two days and night no one was allowed to enter his chamber. No one was allowed to even breathe in his direction.
Hades was centuries old, though. It was easy to accept some things in his slumber, it was equally easy to let them go, too.
When Hades awoke again, it was nothing but a scar. It didn’t hurt anymore when he touched it, but feeling the ragged fracture, he remembered what was there.
He found himself touching his right wrist, slender finger tracing the skin that wasn’t his in an attempt to find the scar he was thinking about. How ridiculous.
“Lord Hades.” when he looked up, Kagaho was kneeling in front of him again. That made Hades wonder, how long was he here? Did he witnessed that terribly pitiful view? Even if he did, he probably would never utter a word about that. Kagaho wasn’t like that. Or maybe that was his imagination of Kagaho?
“Have you done what I told you to do?” he straightened up, looking down at Kagaho. The Specter didn’t seem to be this insecure anymore. He was still kneeling, but his eyes were directly on Hades. That was Kagaho he remembered. That was Kagaho he missed.
Because he had gone through so much torment in his human life, Hades’ godly presence neither his power was of no treat to him. Kagaho didn’t fear death. Kagaho didn’t care for his own self. Maybe he beared in mind he couldn’t truly die. Maybe he truly was this brave. Silently, Hades always praised that. Kagaho treated him with respect, but not like an egg that can break any time. Was that belief in his strength? Maybe. Maybe just idiocy.
“I have.” with that reply, Kagaho got up. Tensed, Hades watched how the Specter slowly walked up to him. In that moment, the couple of stairs seemed endless, waiting unbearable.
The body of his vessel was fragile, exhausted with years of dealing with sickness and even despite Hades Divine Cosmos, it still didn’t regained its true potential. Hades wasn’t really afraid of Kagaho. Hades fear nothing, except his body getting wounded, but even a God like him couldn’t wash away the memories of betrayal.
Kagaho kneeled by his feet, taking his gloved hand and as shameless as he was, pressed it against his lips for a kiss. It was a tender one. Hades felt the walls he was rebuilding with utmost care began crumbling again.
“I can grant my Lord’s every wish now.”
Hades was seconds from reaching out and entangling his fingers within the Specter’s hair. He missed how soft it was. He missed the feeling of being grounded when he brushed the strands, his thoughts wandering for once into something more pleasure than the constant battles. But they were in a war, and Hades couldn’t let himself make the same mistake again.
“For how long, Kagaho? Maybe this vessel is reminding you of someone as well?” he tried to sound impassive, like stating facts, but the bitter tone still slipped. When Kagaho looked up again, there was tenderness and devotion on his face. Devotion, to whom? Hades didn’t know anymore.
“Lord Hades knows why I have done that. But my loyalty and love toward my God have never changed.”
It sounded like facts so obvious, Hades wondered if he wasn’t wrong this entire time? But that feeling lasted no longer than a split seconds. How could have he been wrong? Betrayal or not, Kagaho abandoned him. He abandoned him for so long Hades began to think it was going to be his eternity.
“Empty words.” he barked, pulling his hand away. Only Kagaho had silent permission to touch him. Majority of his Specters didn’t even know how he look like. It didn’t change the fact that Kagaho could have touched him to his heart’s content. Not always, at least.
Kagaho promised himself he would work hard to gain Hades trust again.
That wasn’t an easy task. What task in life is easy? They can be less problematic than others basing on personal experience or qualities, but if they took no effort, it would mean they were not worth starting in the first place.
How many times Kagaho had failed? He couldn’t say. Often times Hades was too moody to even approach him, but Kagaho tried, and tried.
Sometimes their only interaction was greeting Hades at the start and at end of the day. Sometimes he was kneeling in front of him for long, long hours. There was always silence surrounding them, but Kagaho knew it was worth it. Silently, he kept a careful eye on Pandora and Twin Gods. He scolded guardians when they were acting too loud and made sure no one was interrupting the God’s rest. He was a quiet, but steady presence by his side, direct or not.
Kagaho promised himself he would keep Hades safe. He was going to keep that promise even with the costs of his own life.
With time, he began to notice small changes.
Hades spoke to him more often. At first, those were only his voiced out needs - I am tired, I want a bath, bring me tea. It slowly turned to God telling him possible scenarios for this Holy War and then, Hades began reminiscing. Kagaho listened attentively, whether some nostalgic memories or gossips the God wanted to share with him.
Hades didn’t stay wary anymore when Kagaho was around. He allowed himself to meditate for hours, searching for the proper bond with his vessel to allow his divine powers strengthen. Later, he usually did that with Kagaho’s hand between his own, like if he was a link between that body and his soul.
“Lord Hades.” He raised his head lazily from where it was resting on Kagaho’s shoulder. Straddling his lap, his back was turned to Pandora. She seemed to be so used to that she didn’t even react. “We have intruders.” she announced simply, leaving the chamber immediately.
“They play begins.”
Sometimes he was wondering what exactly was determining win or loss in the Holy War. Long time ago he stopped thinking it was power or justice. Was Athena playing unfair? Or maybe certain numbers of fall would make his victory more spectacular. Maybe it was like playing dice. Or maybe win or loss was something completely random. Maybe after hundred of times, Athena and humanity would be able to see their mistakes.
He looked around briefly from where Kagaho was shielding him with his wings. There was more blood than actual marble on that floor. Some bodies were dismembered, you could have only say whether they belong to a saint or a specter basing on the cloth that was covering it. Not everyone was dead, thus the room was nothing but filled with agonizing moans.
Death was salvation.
Was that really a world Athena kept fighting for? Was that really worth it, having so many mortals killed, and for what? Even after all that time, Hades was unable to understand it.
“Your time is over, Hades!”
Oh, how many times he had heard that. How many times their weapons touched for life and death. For how long would that repeat?
The incoming blow was fatal, he knew that. He sensed its viciousness, the power, the will to win. Do mortals only care for winning?
Kagaho’s wings seemed to tighten their hold on him. There was blood in the corner of the Specter’s lips, his Surplice, so carefully adjusted by Hades was damaged in too many places he couldn’t see them all. His own was covered with blood, too.
Hades knew it was the end, and he wasn’t really surprised. Sometimes he could have seen it from the very beginning. He was still going to try. Over and over again, until his duty as a God was fulfilled, and all these sinners get what they deserved.
His eyes flashed red when he put himself in front of Kagaho, shielding him. He couldn’t let someone like Athena to harm him. Not in this life… Not in many other, future lives he will have.
The impact of the gold cane hitting against his ribcage drew blood from his lips; it was so crimson the color looked almost black. It burned, like the blood suddenly started boiling in his veins, like if the sun rays somehow ended up tearing through all the layers straight to the Underworld. To a God, a blow from the other God was agonizing.
“Lord Hades!” hands caught him, strong and steady, but his soul has already being pulled into that abyss of darkness, the void he was about to spend another 200 years in. Maybe next time…
He smiled; it didn’t hurt anymore.
“Wait for me, Kagaho.”