Archive of Our Own ^beta

MONDAY

“Ai’Wat, here!”

Sarawat turned his head in Man’s direction, shooting him the ball in order for him to score a goal. His whole team erupted in cheers as Sarawat hugged Man and Boss in celebration.

“We won!” Boss exclaimed proudly, going to hug his other teammates.

The bell would be ringing in about five minutes, and as the euphoria from their little afternoon match dissipated, Sarawat drank some water under the gaze of his many fans.

In reality, Sarawat hated calling them like that. He wasn’t a celebrity after all, and these other students barely knew anything about him yet they loved the idea of him. His physical appearance. Who they thought he was based on that.

And Sarawat hated it with all he got, despite his friends always telling him how lucky he was to have that many girls wanting to be with him. But it wasn’t a good thing if he didn’t want to get with any of them, and Sarawat didn’t. So all he gained was being looked at like a circus animal.

He sighed, drinking some more water as he observed the people around him. A few group of girls were sprinkled throughout the schoolyard, some standing only a few meters from the football area, others sat further away on benches, and some others were on the first floor of their school, looking down at him from the balcony area surrounding the classes.

And it’s there that Sarawat saw him again. The boy. Sarawat had also been confessed to by boys before, but the weird thing was that this one didn’t do anything except staring at him from afar. He was also the only one of his fans to be alone, usually they were always in groups.

Sarawat had started noticing him about two months ago, when Boss had pointed the student to him while asking if they knew each other. The answer was no, Sarawat didn’t know this individual at all, which made it even weirder of a situation.

And that day, the boy was here again, looking at him half hidden by a pillar. Sarawat stared at him back, trying to figure out who he was. The boy didn’t seem to realize their eye contact at first, before recoiling in shame once he understood that Sarawat was in fact looking at him.

Sarawat watched the boy scramble away in the hallway with a satisfied smirk. He really had to confront the guy.

TUESDAY

The next day, his friends organized another football match, which Sarawat declined for the very first time. Instead, he went to the first floor and looked for the boy, making a few of his other fangirls scream on his way, which put his plan in jeopardy and annoyed him.

After looking for about five minutes, Sarawat found him. He was taller from this angle, almost taller than Sarawat. He was leaning on his usual guardrail behind a pillar, his brows furrowed as his eyes scanned the schoolyard in his search.

Sarawat understood why the boy went there to look at him: here, they were quite far away from the other students, which was perfect for a discreet confrontation.

Sarawat cleared his throat, making the boy turn around with a gasp, before becoming as pale as a ghost once saw him.

“P’Sarawat...” he murmured, looking as if he was about to faint.

Sarawat got closer to him which caused the junior to lean backward in fear.

“What’s your name?”

The junior was blushing now, and looking everywhere but in Sarawat’s eyes.

“Hum… T- Tine.”

“In which grade are you?”

“Grade 11, P’.”

The junior was now able to have some form of eye contact with him for about a second before returning to his avoiding self.

“Are you scared of me?” Sarawat asked, because he genuinely wanted to know. He didn’t want to traumatize the guy either.

Tine shook his head hastily before settling his gaze on the ground. “No.”

“Then why are you so shocked?”

“Because… you’re usually playing football at this time,” Tine replied, before realizing he had just outed himself and putting a hand on his mouth in shame.

“Listen, Tine...” Sarawat said, crossing his arms on his torso. “I’ll get straight to the point, I’ve seen you look at me longingly. Do you like me?”

The boy was now as red as a tomato while also seeming like he was about to pass out. He shook his head again. “Not at all, P’!” he cried out.

And for the first time since they had started talking, Tine was able to maintain eye contact with Sarawat. It was clear he really wanted to prove his senior that he was saying the truth.

“I just… really admire you, P’.”

Sarawat smirked, seeing the student in front of him smile shyly in response.

“I’m sorry Nong, but I don’t believe you. I’ve admired people before, and I don’t look at them like that for months on end.”

Sarawat watched the boy’s smile falter as he scrambled to try and find another valid explanation. It did make the senior feel a bit bad.

“You like me, it’s okay,” he continued. “But what I don’t like is people who like from afar and pretend like their feelings don’t exist. If you like someone, you should confess to them.”

Sarawat noticed that the junior was trembling now, including his face as if he was going to cry. Seeing that, he couldn’t help but put his hand on top of Tine’s head, caressing his hair for a few seconds. The boy looked shocked, though he was blushing again.

“If you like me,” he spoke again. “You should flirt with me.”

Tine’s eyes were now as wide as golf balls and he stared at him with a gaping mouth . Sarawat didn’t even know what was coming out of his mouth. In fact, he didn’t even know what was his initial plan of confronting the student. He had acted recklessly, following his whim to meet this boy.

“I finish at 3 today. See you then if you dare.”

And on those last words, he walked away, leaving Tine looking as if he had just passed through a tornado of feelings and new information.

The boy was waiting for him in front of the school gates when Sarawat finished his classes . He was accompanied by three of his friends though, which annoyed Sarawat a tiny bit .

“What happened today?” Boss whispered to him with curiosity.

Sarawat simply shrugged before approaching Tine who was back to his usual blushing self. ‘I admire you’ my ass, the senior thought. You definitely like me.

“You came,” he simply said once he stopped in front of the student.

Tine nodded with a small shy smile. His friends patted him on the back and left, leaving the two of them standing there in the way of the thousands of students getting out of school at this hour.

Sarawat couldn’t ignore the numerous looks they were getting, from some of his fans or other random students. He didn’t really like it, but in a way it felt a bit exhilarating. Sarawat had never been seen with anyone outside of his friends, but now he was talking to a younger guy who had waited for him. It was ambiguous indeed. But Sarawat didn’t mind it.

“How do you go home?”

“I drive, P’.”

Sarawat nodded. “Okay. Drive me home?”

Tine looked up at him in surprise. “Don’t you usually come on a motorcycle too?”

Sarawat smirked. “You really know everything about me, uh?”

Tine looked away bashfully, a blush spreading on his pale cheeks.

“My motorcycle can wait here a night. But you’ll have to come drive me to school tomorrow though.”

Tine seemed as if he was about to pass out, his hands visibly shaking.

“What do you say?” Sarawat pressed.

Tine nodded. “Okay, P’.”

Tine was a very good driver, he drove fast but safely and respected all the rules. The wind blowing in their hair helped alleviate the torrid warmth of the afternoon, and they arrived quite soon at Sarawat’s house.

The senior got up of the vehicle and looked back at his junior.

“Do you wanna come inside?”

It seemed as if Tine would never be able to stop blushing around him because his cheeks were red once again, looking positively stunned by that question.

“So?”

Tine ended up nodding, stopping the engine and following into his house. They went up to his room and Sarawat let himself fall onto his bed while Tine was standing as straight as a building and looking around his room.

“Aren’t you gonna sit down?”

Tine gazed at him, before nodding and walking towards his desk chair and sitting in it.

“Are you scared of sitting next to me on my bed?”

Tine shook his head, though he still avoided his eyes.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t bring you here to have sex.”

Tine’s blush deepened, though he stole him a glance.

“Why did you bring me here, then?”

Sarawat sighed, looking at the ceiling. “That’s a good question. I don’t really know.”

Tine smiled a tiny bit. “That’s weird.”

“Not as weird as looking at me from behind a pillar,” Sarawat couldn’t help but tease, making the junior lose all his composure.

“I, uh… I -” he stuttered, his hands moving erratically.

“Why do you like me, Tine?”

Tine shut his mouth, finally looking at him as if he had asked a forbidden question.

“Come on, tell me,” the senior insisted. “I don’t bite.”

“I… I like how secretive you are,” Tine finally confessed. “How cold you are to your fans but the warm smile you give your closest friends. The way you play guitar, too. Like you were made for it.”

Sarawat was smiling now. From all the reasons people have given him to like him, it was the first time he heard the second one.

“Were you planning on telling me one day?” he wondered.

Tine shook his head.

“Are you the kind of people who never get the courage to confess?”

Tine’s head moved again. “Not really, P’. Actually, I’ve had a few girlfriends before.”

Sarawat furrowed his brows. This was a development he hadn’t seen coming. The shy, stuttering guy before him had girlfriends before? That was surprising.

“And you confessed to them?” Tine nodded. “Then, why didn’t you do it with me?”

Sarawat felt a bit angry now. Did Tine not like him in the way he had liked his ex-girlfriends? What did that mean?

Tine looked down in shame. He could decipher his senior’s anger through his tone of voice.

“I… I’ve never liked a boy before, P’.” He confessed. “And you’re pretty unattainable.”

“So you didn’t even give it a try?”

Tine shook his head. “I did try, P’. I tried to join the music club at the beginning of the year but I didn’t get in since I didn’t play an instrument.”

Sarawat immediately softened. Somehow the thought of Tine trying to join a club for him warmed his heart.

“Ah,” he whispered. “Then… I allow you to flirt with me. But put in your all, okay?”

Tine’s eyes widened, though he nodded eagerly. Sarawat smiled. He had to admit, at least to himself, that the boy was really cute.

“Okay. Come sit on the bed,” he ordered as he patted the space next to him before getting up to fetch his guitar.

When he sat down, Tine was sitting there, a ball of nerves and warmth.

“Since you didn’t have the occasion to learn an instrument, let me teach your the guitar, okay?” he said as he put the guitar on his junior’s lap.

Tine awkwardly held it, clearly not knowing where to put his fingers.

“Okay, let’s start with the Em chord,” Sarawat declared. “It’s really easy because it only requires two fingers on the second fret. You see, the guitar is separated by metallic bar, and we call each of these a fret. So here on the second fret, the second and third chord.”

Tine tried to follow his instructions as well as he could, but ended up looking extremely confused, so Sarawat took the guitar from him to show him, playing the strings so he could hear the sound.

“You gotta press hard on the strings, okay? At first it’s difficult but you’ll get used to it.”

Tine tried again and was able to deliver an actual sound this time, though it was clear he wasn’t pressing down hard enough.

“You need to press harder.”

He tried again but to no avail. Sarawat sighed and put his fingers on top of his.

“Here, strum.”

This time the sound was much clearer. Tine smiled, looking in his direction for approval. Sarawat realized he was smiling too, weirdly proud of his junior.

“You now know your first chord. Two more and you’ll be able to play a lot of songs.”

Tine looked surprised. “Really?! It’s that easy?”

Sarawat nodded. “A lot of popular songs use only the same three or four chords.”

Tine was still smiling, satisfied he had pleased the senior he liked while Sarawat looked at him fondly. Tine seemed to realize it and suddenly got shy, looking away while fidgeting with the guitar still on his lap.

“I haven’t offered you anything to drink,” Sarawat realized out loud.

Tine chose that moment to get up, looking incredibly awkward in doing so. “It’s getting late, P’. I need to go home.”

Having said that, he put his backpack on and walked towards the door of his room.

“Don’t forget to pick me up tomorrow at 7!” Sarawat barely had the time to yell before the boy was gone, leaving him a bit breathless.

WEDNESDAY

Tine was early the next day, waiting for him with a nervous look on his face.

“I like early people,” Sarawat simply said as he arrived, ignoring how shy it made his junior. “Have you eaten breakfast yet?”

Tine shook his head. Sarawat sat behind him on the vehicle, his hands falling on his waist. Though he couldn’t see the other student’s face, he had no doubt Tine was losing it at a simple touch.

“N- not yet, P’,” he finally replied.

“Good. Let’s stop by a food stall near the school and eat there. We have a bit of advance.”

Tine nodded before starting the engine.

The traffic was particularly good that day, which meant that Sarawat took his time to enjoy his congee before school started. Tine and him didn’t really talk much, Sarawat being too busy eating and Tine simply being too shy.

“Which club did you end up joining, then?” Sarawat asked once they had consumed all their food.

“The cheerleading club,” Tine answered, looking for his wallet to pay for their meal.

Sarawat put a hand on his. “I’ve got this.”

By the time he had paid, Tine was already standing up, making his senior scramble to follow him in their school’s direction which was only a minute or two away. As they arrived at the gate, Sarawat thought of a follow-up question.

“Why did you choose the cheerleading club?”

But before Tine could answer, a boy put his arm around his shoulders with a teasing smile. Sarawat recognized him from the group of friends that had waited with Tine at the end of school the day before.

“Ai’Tine, you even came to school together?” he teased. “Are you already a couple?”

Tine blushed and hit him on the head, trying to refute the claims while another one of his friends came up to him and pinched his waist, making lower his upper body with a laugh.

“I never thought you’d have the balls to approach him!”

A third boy arrived while the two others were basically carrying Tine inside the building and leaving Sarawat speechless.

That boy actually greeted him. “Hello, P’. Sorry, for them, they’re kind of idiots.”

Sarawat raised his eyebrows. “I can see that.”

The junior seemed to hesitate, biting his lip before he dared to speak again. “But P’, can I ask you… what’s going on with Tine?”

Sarawat smirked. “Well, you should know. He likes me and he’s going to flirt with me from now on.”

The friend seemed shocked. “And… you’re okay with that?”

Sarawat shrugged, trying to play it cool. “Why not.”

He then spotted Man and Boss sat on a bench and went to join them, patting the junior on the shoulder before leaving.

Sarawat didn’t see Tine for the rest of the day, which seemed normal. Before they had officially met, the only time Sarawat would see Tine was during a football match, looking at him from the school’s first floor. But still, the senior couldn’t help but feel a tad disappointed when he didn’t see the boy in the cafeteria or in the schoolyard during any of their breaks.

Wednesday was a music club day, and the students who could ended up playing their instrument in the schoolyard that was now deserted.

About an hour in, though, the cheerleaders came in to rehearse their routine, creating a big argument between Dim, the music club president, and Fang, the cheerleading club president. It was a big mess that interrupted both rehearsals and left both clubs annoyed. Before they could reach an agreement though, it was already time to wrap up as students had to go to their tutor schools.

Sarawat looked at Tine in the crowd of cheerleaders. He was also looking at Sarawat, who signaled him to come up to him once the people had dispersed.

“Do you have to go to the tutor school?” Sarawat asked, patting the space next to him so Tine would sit there, which he did.

Tine shook his head. “Nah, I go there on Saturdays.”

“Me too,” Sarawat smirked, realizing he still had his guitar in his lap.

“Here,” he said, placing it onto Tine. “Come on, play me the Em chord.”

Tine hesitated for a moment, looking at the sky while he remembered the fingers’ position and then taking his time to place them until they were at the right place. He then strummed, a satisfied grin coming to his face when the sound didn’t come out too bad.

“Good,” Sarawat praised, grabbing the guitar from him and showing him a new chord. “Today you’ll learn the Am chord. It requires three fingers, but it’s quite easy.”

He took his time to demonstrate the chord, strumming it multiple times before giving the guitar back to him.

Tine looked a bit intimidated though less than the day before, and tried his best to replicate the chord, though it really couldn’t seem to come out right.

“Press harder,” Sarawat encouraged.

He saw Tine’s fingers dig into the strings deeper, yet the sound still sounded wrong. Sarawat put his fingers on Tine’s, pressing even harder until the sound was finally good. Once he felt like Tine had gotten it, he detached from him and watched him try once more without his help.

“That’s great,” he smiled, patting Tine’s head fondly.

The junior turned in his direction, looking shy as always before managing to look even shyer a second later when he realized their faces were awfully close. Sarawat registered that fact at the same time, noticing that their faces had been getting closer as they both focused on Tine’s fingers on the strings.

But now Sarawat wasn’t focusing on that anymore, favoring the junior’s face instead. He was really pretty, with pale skin, wide eyes and thick peach-colored lips. Being close to him only emphasized that.

Without realizing it, Sarawat had been drawn closer, only a couple centimeters away from his lips. It seemed like they were about to kiss, and for some reason Sarawat didn’t take issue with that.

But before their lips could touch, Tine turned his head, getting up suddenly as if the bench was burning. Sarawat just looked at him, speechless.

“I realized that I said I would help my brother tonight, sorry I need to go,” the boy said under his breath before basically running away.

Sarawat watched him go, speechless, before a satisfied smirk came onto his lips. He really liked seeing Tine lose his composure.

THURSDAY

Sarawat didn’t see Tine the next morning, or during lunch that day. It’s not like he didn’t try to walk in uncharted corners of the school he never went to, but the boy had basically vanished.

“You’re looking for that boy, aren’t you?” Man asked during lunch, noticing that his best friend was looking around like a lost puppy.

Sarawat finally turned to look at him. “How did you know?”

“Well you’ve been a little weird since you’ve confronted him.”

“Do you like him?” Boss wondered.

Sarawat thought about it for a minute before answering: “I don’t know. Probably?”

“You’ve never cared about someone who wasn’t your friend like that before,” Man pointed out.

“Even your friends don’t get that treatment,” Boss teased.

Sarawat nodded. They were right. He probably liked Tine, who liked him too.

“You’re smiling.”

He was. It was the first time he liked someone who reciprocated his feelings. And it felt really good.

Tine appeared when he played football, behind his usual pillar. At first it threw Sarawat off balance and caused him to let the opponent score, but after a few minutes it encouraged him to try and do better than usual.

Once the match had ended (and they had won yet again), Sarawat rushed to the first floor to find Tine before the bell rang. He was still outside, looking at the sky dreamily.

“Hey.”

Tine gasped just like during their first meeting, before relaxing when he saw that it was him.

“Hey,” the junior smiled timidly.

“I finish school at 3 this afternoon, what about you?”

Tine immediately looked disappointed. “I finish at 4.”

“Oh,” Sarawat responded. “That’s okay, I can wait. I’ll do my homework.”

Tine stared at him in surprise. “Really?”

“Hm,” Sarawat nodded with a smile. “You can drive me home.”

Tine bit his lip. “How about you go home and do your homework then and I come to your house once my class is done?”

Sarawat pouted, “I would prefer if you drove me, but this is okay too.”

Tine looked a bit torn. “It’s just that I can’t come and pick you up tomorrow morning so you better stay close to your motorcycle.”

“Why?”

“I have to drive my brother to his university because his car has broken down,” he explained.

Sarawat smiled. “Okay then. Come to my place as soon as you’ve finished your class.”

Tine nodded eagerly as if to prove he would be true to his word.

Sarawat was getting impatient, walking in circles and glancing once every minute through his room’s window. At around 4:30, Tine appeared in front his house, making him run down the stairs to open his door and invite him inside.

“Sorry I took a little long to get here, there was some traffic,” Tine justified with an apologetic smile.

“No worries,” Sarawat responded, putting a hand on his back to guide him inside.

They went up to his room and Sarawat couldn’t help but notice that Tine seemed less shy now, directly sitting on his bed next to him. It made the senior very happy.

“I realized I didn’t serve you anything last time. Can I get you a snack and some water?”

“Yes please, I’m starving,” Tine nodded.

Sarawat rushed downstairs and got back with a small platter full of snacks and two glasses of water.

“Here you go.”

He watched Tine munch on one of the snacks with a smile, loving to see his cheeks get rounder and cuter as he ate. Tine seemed to notice he was being observed but didn’t say anything even though his cheeks got a little redder.

“Is it good?”

Tine nodded shyly, and Sarawat stole the remaining piece of it from Tine’s hand, putting it in his own mouth.

“You’re right, I’ll buy more of these next time,” he smirked as the junior lost more of his confidence.

“You’re… often alone like this?” Tine finally asked once silence had resumed in the room.

Sarawat shrugged. “Yeah, but I’m not often home this early though. I usually hang out with my friends.”

“You don’t like being in an empty house?”

He shook his head. “Not really. I don’t mind it, but I prefer to be surrounded by people. My younger brother, he’s your age actually, goes to tutor school and has club meetings until pretty late at night and my parents work quite a lot.”

Tine furrowed his brows. “Your brother is in another school than you?”

Sarawat chuckled. “Yeah, it’s what he wanted. His school is also better than ours academically so that’s why he chose it. But he has to work a lot.”

Tine nodded, grabbing his glass of water and gulping it down.

“You’ve been less shy with me. I like it.” Sarawat noticed, making Tine almost choke on his water.

“Really?” he responded, looking around the room to hide his awkwardness.

“Yeah. I prefer when you treat me like you treat everyone else.”

“But you’re not just everyone else...” Tine whispered under his breath.

Sarawat smiled, big and open. “What?”

Tine shook his head, blushing yet again. “Nothing.”

They stared at each other for a minute, before Tine couldn’t take it and broke the eye contact.

“So, hum, which chord are you teaching me today?” he queried, trying to change the mood of the room.

Sarawat got up and fetched his guitar. “What about the chord of C? It’s a bit similar to Am.”

Tine nodded and Sarawat put his fingers on the right strings and watched as Tine tried to strum the guitar and almost immediately getting a somewhat decent result.

“You’re getting good!” he complimented. “Come on, play me the three chords you’ve learned so far.”

Tine applied himself to play the three chords as well as he could, and for someone who had been learning guitar for three days and only practiced with Sarawat, he had a pretty impressive level.

“Do you want to learn a fourth one? With these four you can play a bunch of songs.”

Tine nodded eagerly with a smile.

“Okay, the G chord. This kinda demands some gymnastics, you gotta put your ring finger on the fifth chord of the third fret, your middle finger on the first chord of the same fret and your index finger on the fifth chord of the second fret,” Sarawat explained as he positioned his fingers.

Tine struggled a bit more for this one, the gap between his ring finger and middle fingers being quite large. But eventually, he seemed to get it.

“Now try to put the four chords together in the same order you learned them.”

And so he did, his strumming technique consisting of one awkward strum per chord, but Sarawat remembered he did the same when he started learning guitar.

Tine seemed so satisfied he started mumbling to the tune, getting lost in the moment. He was so beautiful in that moment, entranced in the music, that Sarawat’s heart stopped beating.

“Is it any good?” Tine asked with a smile, noticing the way Sarawat was staring at him with big dark eyes and shying away. His eyes went to the other side of the room as Sarawat was leaned close to him over the guitar still on his lap.

“It was really good,” Sarawat finally responded in a whisper.

Tine turned in his direction again despite the thick blush on his cheeks. “Really?”

“Hm,” Sarawat nodded, “Really.”

The room then got really silent as they both stared into each other’s eyes. Sarawat slowly got even closer, surprised at the lack of reaction from Tine, until he was only an inch away from his lips. They both closed their eyes as their lips touched, barely moving against each other, too shy to attempt anything too advanced.

Sarawat’s hands fell around Tine’s face though, thumbs resting on his warm cheeks. It lasted long seconds before they had to detach.

Tine’s gaze immediately went to the ground, or more accurately the guitar, unable to look at him. Sarawat’s hands on his face forced him to face him though, even though he seemed more shy than ever before.

“Are you okay?” Sarawat asked.

Tine nodded, closing his eyes. He looked adorable like that. It made Sarawat chuckle a little, before approaching again for a second kiss.

“P’, are you home?”

They detached as soon as they heard the voice coming from downstairs, Tine gasping in his usual surprised tone as Sarawat cursed under his breath.

“Stay here,” he said as he got out of the room, not wanting to make him uncomfortable by having him meet his brother so early on.

“Phukong, why are you already here?” he asked, annoyed at the sight of his little brother.

“Jeez, nice to see you too P’,” the boy rolled his eyes. “I finished early, my club’s president was sick.”

Sarawat nodded, standing at the bottom of the stairs and feeling like an idiot.

“You look suspicious,” Phukong noticed with a smug smile.

“No,” Sarawat refuted.

Tine chose this moment to go down the stairs, stopping before them. Sarawat immediately noticed that he had his school’s bag in hand.

“Hello,” he greeted Phukong, before turning to face Sarawat, though he couldn’t look at him in the eyes anymore. “I think it’s time for me to go home. My mom will be waiting for me for dinner.”

Sarawat wanted to protest, invite him to eat over, even sleep over if he was able to… but just ended up nodding instead.

“Okay,” he uttered. “See you tomorrow.”

Tine nodded, rushing through the door as Sarawat kicked himself mentally for letting him go that easily.

“Who was that guy?”

Sarawat hit his brother behind the head, making him shout. “None of your business.”

FRIDAY

It was starting to get a little repetitive: it seemed as if all Sarawat did in school was searching for Tine. But the boy was never anywhere to be found, and it was starting to be a bit annoying. That being said, Sarawat knew he’d get to see him during the afternoon recess, leaning over the rail behind his usual pillar to look at him.

After the whole day spent only being able to look forward to those twenty minutes of freedom shared with Tine from opposite sides of the school, that recess did eventually come.

Sarawat rushed toward the schoolyard, happy to not only have finished his school week, but that he’d get to see Tine in a few minutes, and maybe kiss him again.

Tine always came about five minutes after they started playing football, so Sarawat just focused on the beginning of the match, trying to look as cool as he could so Tine would be impressed by what he saw once he arrived.

Alas, well after five minutes, Sarawat realized he still wasn’t there. Ten minutes later too. And as the match ended, he felt himself rush to their school’s first floor to Tine’s usual pillar, feeling dejected to realize he wasn’t in any of the surrounding classrooms.

Ensued a chase of him running around their entire school, trying to find the guy who disappeared on him so often. After a good twenty minutes and 3 floors browsed, Sarawat finally recognized someone. It wasn’t Tine, but one of his friends he’d seen twice before.

“Nong!” he exclaimed.

“Shhh,” the boy whispered with a finger on his mouth. “They’re doing oral presentations in that classroom.”

Tine’s two other friends joined them, previously sat on the ground which is why Sarawat hadn’t seen them.

“Tine is in there,” one of them added.

“Oh,” Sarawat replied. Tine was in class. “It’s just, he didn’t come see me during recess.”

“That’s because our psycho teacher started the presentations early so he could fit all of them in one period,” the student replied.

“When will Tine be done?”

“Probably in an hour, he’s at the end of the alphabet.”

Sarawat sighed. “I can wait for him. Isn’t it what you’re doing?”

They all shook their heads simultaneously.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea, P’. We’re all going to tutor school after that so Tine won’t have any time for you. We’ll probably also be late because that teacher is really slow and critiques every single word we say.”

Sarawat felt dejected. “Okay, then… could you give me his phone number?”

Sarawat laid in bed in the evening, feeling anxious and disappointed. He had sent Tine a text hours ago but he hadn’t responded yet, and it was already night now. That meant that Sarawat had probably no chance of seeing Tine that day.

Suddenly, his phone lit up, and Sarawat jumped on it. Tine had finally texted him back.

S: I’m sad we didn’t get to see each other today. Can you pass by my house, even for a few minutes, after tutor school? Sarawat.

T: I’m so sorry P’, my phone died and I was stuck as tutor school! It’s only now that I’m at home and was able to charge my phone that I saw your message.

Sarawat felt immediately better. It was clear they’d just had a miscommunication issue, and now it was all solved.

S: It’s okay, I’m glad it was just that. Have you eaten yet?

T: I’m eating right now, P’. What about you?

S: I’ve eaten hours ago. But I’m craving something else than food.

T: What?

S: You.

Tine didn’t respond for a good five minutes, making Sarawat wonder if he had gone too far.

T: You’re too much, P’.

S: Hm, you’re right. Can I come see you at your home, even for a few minutes?

T: It’s so late, P’. I’m going to sleep in an hour.

S: Where do you live? I’ll be there in thirty minutes top and you’ll be in bed in an hour.

T: P’…

S: Please, I want to see you.

Sarawat could see Tine sighing at his pushover ways, but he couldn’t help them.

T: … fine.

“Yes!” Sarawat exclaimed, getting out of his bed and rushing down the stairs with his phone and his motorcycle’s keys in hand. Phukong was in the living room watching TV, and looked at Sarawat as if he was insane.

“Phukong, I’m going out for an hour or two, tell mom not to worry!”

And as Sarawat stepped into the warm night of Bangkok, he realized he actually didn’t know where Tine lived.

S: … what is your adress?

Tine came out almost as soon as Sarawat texted him that he was in front of his house. The boy came running in his direction.

“P’, let’s go at the end of the street, okay? I don’t want my family knowing I’m outside this late,” he murmured, pushing his senior to drive again.

Sarawat did, and parked himself at the end of the street like Tine wanted. The junior joined him a minute later, having walked there.

“Thank you,” Tine sighed. “I’ve just got a really nosy brother.”

Sarawat chuckled. “The one you drove to his university this morning?”

Tine nodded. “Yeah, I’ve only got one brother. And he really took all of the annoying in the family.”

Sarawat laughed again. “How did you do on your oral presentation?”

Tine simply shook his head, looking suddenly disappointed. “Let’s not even talk about it, P’.”

“Okay,” Sarawat nodded, leaning against his motorcycle.

Silence fell for a moment, and Tine looked around to see if any of their neighbors were watching them.

“I think I jinxed us,” Sarawat declared after a while, “teaching you two chords yesterday. Now I didn’t get to teach you a new one today and you didn’t even get to practice.”

Tine smiled, looking down at his own hands. “It’s okay, P’.”

Sarawat nodded. “You’re right, I’ll teach you a new chord soon enough.”

Tine’s smile widened, and so did Sarawat’s. The older boy thought about the fact that he had just driven in the pitch black night to see a boy he didn’t know five days prior. All because he missed him.

“I’m so happy I still got to see you today,” he confessed.

Tine blushed, and looked at his hands yet again. “Me too,” he echoed in a shy voice.

His phone chose that moment to ring, Tine checking his text messages.

“Shit, my brother knows I’m outside,” he swore under his breath. “He wants me to come back immediately.”

Sarawat nodded reluctantly. He wanted to spend more time with Tine, but he also didn’t want to put him in trouble.

“Okay, then do that. I’m already glad I got to see you,” he responded.

Tine pouted. “But you’ve come all this way…”

Sarawat’s hand ended in Tine’s hair, caressing them softly. “To see you, and I did. And it’s enough for me.”

Tine looked shy once again, nodding slowly. “Okay then. Thank you for coming, and sorry for my brother.”

“See you soon,” Sarawat smiled.

“Hm,” Tine nodded with a secretive smile.

Sarawat watched him walk a few steps, then stop. He wanted to ask why, but before he could open his mouth Tine had turned around and ran back in front of him, leaving a small peck on the corner of his lips.

“Sweet dreams, P’!” he wished, voice thick with embarrassment and shyness.

Sarawat looked at him with a positively surprised smile as he ran away in the dark. “You too, Tine!”

Driving to Tine’s house this late at night had been totally worth it.

SATURDAY

Tutor school was both boring and demanding, which is exactly why Sarawat hated it. Nonetheless, the university exams were coming up and his mom would never let him stop taking those courses until he’d been accepted in a good one. That didn’t Sarawat from wishing he was elsewhere, though.

With Tine, for example. The boy really couldn’t seem to leave his mind for more than a few minutes, always coming back to haunt his every move and word. Which, of course, made studying practically impossible.

At the end of a very long and annoying day of classes, Sarawat decided to text Tine.

S: Finally done with tutor school. What are you doing?

T: I’ve just finished too.

“P’,” a voice called from afar, making Sarawat turned around to stop right at the entrance of the tutor school.

And there he was. The boy he couldn’t get out of his head. “Tine?”

They both looked at one another with a shocked face, before Sarawat was able to speak again.

“You go to this tutor school?”

Tine nodded. “You too, P’?”

“Yeah. It’s surprising that we’ve never seen each other before.”

Tine acquiesced again. “It might have been because I used to finish classes an hour earlier than now, but I’ve started taking a new class so I end later.”

“Oh. Are your grades dropping?”

Tine shook his head with an embarrassed smile. “One subject, and only a tiny bit.”

Sarawat chuckled. They fell silent, not knowing how to prolong the conversation. Sarawat wanted to invite him over, but not with his nosy little brother and their curious parents there.

“Do you… want to eat over at my place?”

Sarawat stared at Tine, who was of course blushing after having said those words.

“I mean, now that you know where it is… we could drive separately and meet there...”

“Yes!” Sarawat exclaimed. “Let’s do it.”

Tine blushed even further at the implication of ‘doing it’, but started walking to his motorcycle. Sarawat practically jumped over his, already turning on the engine.

“Lead the way!”

In the end, it had been Tine who had offered the solution. And Sarawat appreciated it greatly.

Sarawat had been watching Tine’s back while he was cooking in the open kitchen for the past ten minutes, which didn’t go unnoticed by his junior.

“You can turn on the tv, if you want,” he suggested.

Sarawat smirked and got up instead, getting closer to the kitchen closer and his personal chef for the night. He let his chin fall onto Tine’s shoulder, making him startle.

“Don’t cut yourself,” he teased.

Tine, who was shy yet again, nodded.

“Where is your family?”

“My brother is at a seminar – he loves those – and my parents are visiting family up north.”

Sarawat nodded, detaching from him. So they were all alone. Somehow it made him both excited and a bit nervous.

The meal was delicious. Not because Tine was a good cook – which he was – but because it was a meal he had prepared, and Sarawat loved anything coming from the boy.

“I have a confession,” said Tine after they were full and sleepy.

“Shoot away.”

“My brother has a guitar,” he admitted, biting his lip timidly. “So, if you wanna teach me a fifth chord...”

Sarawat grinned. “Bring it, and you’ll know the chord of Dm in no time.”

The guitar hadn’t been used in quite some while, needing Sarawat to tune it before they could use it. Tine hadn’t forgotten the four chords he already knew, which was a relief. He also learned the Dm chord in no time at all.

Sarawat watched him get better by the day with a proud smile.

“Tine,” he spoke. “Why do you let me teach you guitar every time despite never having expressed the wish to learn it?”

Tine stared at him in silence, eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights.

“I mean, your brother even has a guitar, so he could have taught you if you wanted to,” he explained further. “If you’re doing it to make me happy, you don’t need to.”

Tine immediately shook his head. “I don’t do it – I don’t only do it to make you happy,” he stuttered. “Sure, it’s part of it, but… I just like when you teach me.”

Sarawat was smiling, warm and moved by his junior’s words. He brought his hand to Tine’s hair, caressing it lovingly.

“I like teaching you too. You’re a great student.”

Tine smiled shyly, nodding as they got closer and kissed. That kiss was different from the others. While the first two had been chaste and quite quick, this one started out slow, savoring the moment before deepening it.

Tine’s hands had ended up on Sarawat’s shoulders, crumpling his t-shirt. When they detached, Tine’s already plump lips looked red and blotted, which did not make Sarawat want to stop. And so he didn’t, kissing Tine some more, curious to see how red his lips could become.

After a few minutes, their kisses weren’t just that anymore; this was a full on make out session. Sarawat pushed Tine to lay down on the couch, his brother’s guitar long discarded on the floor.

In between kisses, Sarawat found the courage to ask: “Can I stay over tonight?”

And as Tine nodded both eagerly and timidly, Sarawat completely forgot to send his mom a warning text, only able to kiss Tine once more.

SUNDAY

Tine’s bed was quite small for two people, but they had somehow made it work. Sarawat had woken up a few minutes before him and ended up watching his peaceful face half buried under his blanket. The boy really was too cute for his own good.

When Tine finally opened his eyes, he felt shy to realize Sarawat was staring at him, and hid himself under the blanket, making Sarawat chuckle.

“Have you been awake for a long time, P’?” came as a muffled sound from underneath it.

Sarawat shook his head even though Tine couldn’t see him. “No, only ten minutes or so. Come out, you’re gonna suffocate,” he said, trying to pull up the junior from under the blanket, which he succeeded in doing (probably because Tine let himself be pulled up).

“Hi,” he smiled, caressing Tine’s hair softly.

“Hi,” Tine replied, looking red and shy and burying his head in his neck, arms holding Sarawat tightly.

Sarawat hugged him back, feeling really happy. The sun was already pretty strong, so he guessed it was about noon.

His phone rang, getting them out of their sleepy hug, and Sarawat finally realized he had never told his mom he was sleeping at Tine’s.

“Shit!” he swore, detaching from Tine and getting up to search his phone from his jeans’ back pocket.

There was about 10 phone calls and 30 text messages on there, from his mother, father and even brother.

“Shit, shit, shit!” he exclaimed even louder, immediately calling his mom.

“Hey mom,” he winced when he heard her shout from the other end, “I’m really sorry, I slept at my junior’s place and I forgot to tell you. Yes, everything is fine. Okay, I’ll explain when I come home.”

Tine was now standing too, a few meters from him, looking a bit concerned.

“When will I come home?” Sarawat asked, before putting the phone away. “Can I stay this afternoon?”

Tine nodded, looking slightly shy at the idea.

“Mom, I’ll come home for dinner, okay? Thank you. See you soon, love you.”

The senior sighed as he hung up. “I’m gonna die tonight,” he joked.

Tine chuckled. “Then, I gotta make you an amazing last meal.”

The meal was amazing indeed, probably because Sarawat spent it looking longingly at Tine who was sat across from him.

It felt new, all of this. Eating at Tine’s house after a night spent together. Sarawat had never experienced any of this before, so he felt a bit ecstatic.

Sarawat brought the dishes to the sink while Tine had already washing them, and the senior observed his back moving as his hands worked on the plates and silverware. Even though he couldn’t see his face, he imagined it a bit frowned, in deep concentration over the annoying task.

Before he could fully realize, Sarawat was hugging Tine from behind, leaving a sweet kiss on his cheek before letting his chin rest on his shoulders.

Tine threw him an embarrassed glance, before throwing a bit of soapy water on his face.

“Ow!” Sarawat exclaimed, detaching from him and putting a hand near his eye.

“Shit, I’m sorry!” Tine responded, immediately stopping the tap and rushing to him, hands caressing his face as he attempted to look in his eye.

But instead, Sarawat kissed him, a short, chaste one on the corner of his mouth.

Tine just stared at him with a pout. “You pretended.”

Sarawat pouted in return, trying to look sorry. “I did. I’m sorry.”

Tine nodded in defeat, before returning to the sink and opening the tap, only to spray more water at his face.

“Ouch!” Sarawat shouted with a smirk.

Tine pointed his finger in his direction with a menacing glare, making his senior laugh. “You won’t fool me twice.”

They spent the afternoon not doing much. Mostly laying on the couch and holding hands, watching a movie on tv and speaking a little. When the sky started deepening, Sarawat realized he’d have to go soon and he still hadn’t thaught Tine his chord of the day.

So the guitar who had been abandoned the day prior was picked up again.

“You’ll see, the E chord is super easy, it’s basically the Am chord but each finger is one string higher.”

Tine figured it out in a record time, and in a few minutes he was composing a song with the few chords he had learned so far. The next day he’d know seven, exactly the number of days they’d known each other, though Sarawat had technically known of his existence long before they interacted.

Tine was deep in his song when Sarawat’s phone started ringing. It was Pam. Upon looking at his phone, he realized that his mom would soon be waiting for him at home to eat dinner.

“Sorry Tine, I gotta take this,” he announced as he got up and went on the living room’s balcony, barely closing the door behind him.

“Hey.”

“Your mom invited me for dinner tonight. Come pick me up?”

Sarawat sighed with a laugh, “Pam… you always pull that on me.”

“What?”

Sarawat chuckled. “I’m not home and already not sure to be coming back in time for dinner, I’m not sure I can come pick you up on top of that.”

“Uh? Where are you?”

Sarawat sighed again, turning around to look at Tine through the window. The boy was trying to pretend he wasn’t staring at his senior, but it was obvious that he was observing every single one of his moves.

“I’ll tell you later, okay?”

“Okay… well, your mom told me to come in an hour, so you still have time to pick me up. Come on, I don’t want to pay for a taxi.”

Sarawat rolled his eyes. “You’re insufferable.”

Pam laughed through the phone. “I know, I’m sorry. Do it in the name of our friendship.”

Sarawat bit his lip, before finally taking a decision. “Fine. See you in 40 minutes.”

“Great!” she cried out, and Sarawat knew she was smiling. “See you!”

“Hm,” he acquiesced, before hanging up.

When he got back to the living room, Tine had discarded the guitar and was staring at his phone. Sarawat felt bad to leave him all of sudden, but he needed to go now if he wanted to make it in time for dinner.

“I’m sorry,” he announced, making Tine look at him at the sound of his voice. “I have to go. I told my mom I’d be home for dinner.”

Tine smiled sadly, shaking his head. “It’s okay. I get it.”

Sarawat gathered all of his stuff from all around the house and stopped in front of the door, where Tine was standing.

“Thank you for having me,” he smirked.

Tine nodded, “Thank you for coming.”

Sarawat stared at him a few seconds longer before leaving a brief kiss on his lips and running outside, too afraid he wouldn’t be able to leave at all.

“See you tomorrow!” he shouted as he got on his motorcycle, waving him goodbye.

Tine nodded with a small smile, waving him goodbye too. Reassured, Sarawat started driving. It wasn’t without a feeling of regret, though. Sarawat wished he could’ve stayed there all of his life.

MONDAY

It seemed to be a recurring pattern, Tine being nowhere to be found during the school day. It did annoy Sarawat a little, though he was more sad about not getting to spend time with Tine. But it was so common for Tine to be missing that Sarawat didn’t worry about it one bit.

He did start to freak out when he realized Tine didn’t come to watch him play football again. This was weird, even when he tried to reason with himself that the junior was probably busy with another tyrannical teacher.

Still, it didn’t keep him from looking for Tine throughout the whole school once more, finding his class more easily this time around. He was sat inside of it during the break, discussing something with his friends. And for a moment Sarawat was reassured; Tine looked joyful, which meant nothing was happening. He could breathe again.

“Tine!” he called out from the class’ entrance.

Tine and his three friends all turned their heads in his direction, and Sarawat didn’t miss how quickly Tine’s smile disappeared when he saw him. Uh oh. This didn’t sound good.

“Hi, what are you doing here?” the junior answered a bit coldly, though Sarawat could see he was trying really hard to appear normal.

“Not much, just passing by. You didn’t come and watch me play football,” he replied.

Before Tine could even open his mouth again, a few girls from another classrooms ran in his direction, asking him for selfies. Sarawat tried his best to get rid of them as quickly as he could, but more and more girls came towards him as he pushed the first ones away.

Suddenly, Tine was in front of the door, only a few inches from him, clearing his throat.

“Excuse me,” he said towards the fangirls, “I need to go to the bathroom.”

Somehow, he managed to clear a path in the crowd and get away from the class, and Sarawat, who could only watch him get further away and away from him.

“Tine!” he shouted, making his way through the crowd, pushing his own fans away in order to get to him, his silhouette getting smaller and smaller by the second.

“P’Sarawat! We’re your fans!” a girl exclaimed, sounding angry.

Sarawat turned around briefly to look at her. “You’re not my fans. I’m not an actor, I’m not a singer, I’m just a simple dude. Please go be the fans of someone else.”

That seemed to calm her down and he was finally free, running away as if he was purchased by demons.

“Tine!” he exclaimed again, grabbing his junior’s wrist.

Tine spun around, looking at him with both confusion and sadness. He stared at Sarawat’s hand on his wrist as the senior was trying to get the words to come out.

“What’s going on with you?”

Tine acted as if he was crazy, trying to pretend Sarawat’s question was based on nothing. “Not much, I just wanna pee.”

Sarawat sighed, not letting go of his wrist. “You’re acting so cold towards me, and I don’t understand. Everything was fine yesterday.”

“P’,” Tine shook his head as if he was crazy to make such claims. “Nothing is going on. I’m tired, my class is gonna start soon and I need to go to the bathroom.”

He then tried to pull his wrist away from him, which Sarawat grabbed even further.

“Tine,” he begged. “Whatever I did, I’m sorry. Can we go back to who we were yesterday?”

Tine stayed silent for a long minute, trying to think of an answer. When he looked back up at Sarawat, he looked on the verge of tears.

“Fine. Then I’ll tell you. I think we should go back to being strangers from now on.”

Sarawat didn’t know what being kicked in the chest felt like, but he imagined it felt a lot similar to what he was feeling at that moment: a painful chest, difficulty to breathe and an uncontrollable heart.

“Uh?” Was all he could manage to let out. He knew his face conveyed enough emotion to compensate for his lack of words anyway.

Tine nodded, biting his lower lip and looking away from him. “It’s just… this doesn’t feel right, between us. I don’t even know what this is, but I won’t be spun around anymore. You should just go back to your fans… and your girlfriend.”

Sarawat’s brows shot up to the moon when he heard that. “Girlfriend?”

Tine nodded yet again. “I know, P’. I already had a feeling about it, considering the rumors I had heard about you before you talked to me, but now I know they’re true.”

“Tine, I don’t...” he traded off, feeling so beaten down and breathless he couldn’t continue. “What are those rumors?”

Tine looked away again, clearly ashamed to recount them to him. “Well… since you’re very popular, you’ve had a lot of girlfriends. I mean, they weren’t even girlfriends, apparently, which is fine. And now you did these things with me… even though you currently have a girlfriend.”

Sarawat felt like both crying and laughing. “And who’s my girlfriend?”

Tine fidgeted with his hands. “The girl who always hangs out with you. That you called yesterday evening.”

“You heard what I said yesterday?”

Tine nodded. Sarawat finally chuckled, even though he knew he looked a bit crazy at the moment. “So, let me summarize: you think I’m a fuckboy who takes advantage of everyone who likes me. And now I’ve got a girlfriend, Pam, and I’m cheating on her with you.”

Tine nodded, though he did seem to realize how insane it sounded.

Sarawat laughed again. “Why would you think that? All because of silly rumors?”

Tine sighed, looking a bit annoyed. “There is that, but I also don’t understand why… Why you chose to approach me. I mean I’m a random junior and in less than a week you had me in your bed. Isn’t it too fast? We didn’t know each other at all before that. And you’re super popular while I’m definitely not. And I just don’t get -”

“Tine, I like you,” Sarawat interrupted.

The junior closed his mouth immediately, staring at him in shock.

“I don’t know how it happened, but I really do,” he assured. “And Pam is my best friend, there’s nothing going on with her. And I’ve also never had a girlfriend before. In fact… you were my first kiss.”

Tine was now looking like he was about to faint. “Your… first?”

Sarawat chuckled awkwardly, feeling suddenly really shy. “Yes! I know a lot of people are after me but it never felt right with anyone… until I met you.”

Tine had now gotten closer to him again, both standing awkwardly in the now deserted hallway. “Why me, though?”

Sarawat hit him on the forehead. “Can you always explain why you like someone?”

Tine rolled his eyes. “Didn’t you ask me why I liked you on the day we met?”

Sarawat suddenly remembered it and nodded, a bit ashamed. “You’re right. Then… I like you because you’re adorable.”

Tine was now blushing, though he shook his head. “This isn’t enough.”

Sarawat sighed. “Hum… I like your smile?”

“And?”

“I like that you’re a people-pleaser and just wants to make everyone happy.”

“And?”

“I like the little frown that appears on your face when you’re really focused on something.”

“And?”

“The little pout you make for no reason.”

“And?”

Sarawat smirked. “I like your lips. A lot.”

Tine blushed again, though he bit his lip in answer. “That’s quite shallow stuff, all of this. You’ll have to do better next time.”

Sarawat chuckled. “We’ve only known each other for a week. In one more week I’ll have ten new things I like about you.”

The junior was now as red as tomato, standing only a few inches from him. Sarawat let his hand wander in his hair, straightening a few strands.

“So… do you trust me now?”

Tine pretended to hesitate. “Hum… why did you speak so sweetly with P’Pam yesterday, then?”

Sarawat rolled his eyes. “Come on, it wasn’t that sweet. I speak way sweeter to you.”

“Really?” Tine teased. “Then hit me with your best pick up line.”

Sarawat took a minute to select what he’d declare. “As I said, you’re my first kiss. But crazily enough, you doubting me has made me lose my memory and I don’t remember it. I think I need a reminder.”

Tine exploded in laughter, though he was still bright red. “That’s really bad, P’!”

Sarawat pouted. “Hey, I did my best! But I do need a reminder for real.”

Time slowed down immediately, Tine staring at him with his adorable lost expression as Sarawat put hands on his face and kissed him like it was the first time, only a lot longer and deeper than their first time.

When they detached, Sarawat couldn’t help but lace their hands together.

“I’ll hit you with another pick up line...”

Tine looked embarrassed. “P’, I have to go to class, I’m already super late.”

Sarawat nodded, “Hm, come on, I’ll accompany you to the door.”

They walked in silence for a minute or two until they ended up on his noisy classroom.

“See you later,” Sarawat said, pushing him in the door’s direction. “I’ll tell you my pick up line after this class. Find me in the courtyard.”

Tine pouted. “Ow, P’, tell me now, it’ll make me be patient for the end of class.”

Sarawat smiled, caressing his hair yet again. “Okay. My pick up line is that after class I’ll teach you your seventh chord in the courtyard… and that if you nail it I’ll maybe… ask you to be my boyfriend.”

Tine blushed yet again, body swaying as if he was going to faint. “P’! That’s too much.”

Sarawat looked at him with an innocent smile. “What? I have to convince you that I’m not dating anyone else, no? Then I’ll ask you to be my boyfriend. Now go to class.”

He shooed him away as Tine couldn’t even process what he’d just said.

“P’, you can’t… just say that and…”

Sarawat opened his classroom’s door and pushed him in it as he declared: “See you later, future boyfriend!”

The door closed behind him, Sarawat let himself lean on it as the classroom erupted in ‘oooh’s and ‘aaah’s because of his confession. Tine was probably very embarrassed right now, but Sarawat couldn’t feel bad. He also knew his future boyfriend was secretly gloating about the fact that all the members of the Sarawat’s wives club would be green with envy at knowing that Sarawat was Tine’s.

As he walked in the empty hallway with a dumb smile taking up his whole face, he tried to think about which chord he would teach Tine next. F, or A… Maybe D. In a few weeks, Tine would know every chord under the sun.