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Fear was not a new emotion for Haru, he felt it so many times before but never quite like this, his heart seemed to have decided to never stop pounding and was fluttering every so often. God, who would have ever expected this, definitely not him, never. He let out a small laugh, how could he have ever foreseen this coming. He looked out the hotel's windows, vast and overseeing the giant city, before letting his eyes fall upon the hanger holding tomorrow's outfit.
A suit, and not just any suit, a stunning black one, with a matching waistcoat and tie, everything expensive and fancy. Suzue had chosen it for him, she spent so long looking with him for the perfect one, and she didn’t even let him pay for it, nor did she let him pay for the matching shoes which lay below the chair. He was going to look perfect tomorrow for him. Daisuke will probably also look amazing, no matter what happened he always did, it must have been a super power he had. Though Suzue has chosen his outfit this time, Daisuke would probably still look amazing.
They spent so many hours talking things through, how it should look, the feel of it, what colours should be around and how formal will it all be. The biggest argument had come to the flowers, Suzue wanted white roses, which made sense for the occasion but they did not feel Daisuke enough. Haru firmly believed that red ones would look better, they would making him stand out. They would shine brightly against all the stood before and of course they would make Daisuke look as beautiful as he truly was. On this day, all eyes were for him, and Haru would make sure that it was so, even if it meant paving a path of red roses for him.
Daisuke will without a doubt look perfect tomorrow, just like he did every other day, Haru felt something slide down his cheek and froze. Letting his hand travel up he wiped a stray tear away, but more seemed to come. He let his eyes travel to the clock, 3am, he should probably try and rest, nothing can happen anymore tonight, and tomorrow is a big day, he has to be up early.
When he woke up in the morning the sun seemed to glare at him from its place high in the morning sky. It appeared to for tell perfect sunny weather for today. Haru quickly got dressed up, neat and nice and he even did his hair the way Suzue told him too. And with a deep breath he headed out of the hotel, outside a expansive black car waited from him, with tinted windows and a driver dressed smartly. It took them a good 20 minutes to reach their destination, a small church by a green forest. When the car pulled to a stop Haru hurried out, straightening out his clothes before looking around. Everyone seemed to be here already, all dressed in beautiful outfits, some in fancy rich ones, that almost sparkled in the sun light while some other in more ratty suits, clearly used before. Though one thing that seemed to unite everyone were red eyes and a few shed tears.
Haru took a few final glances around before finally moving towards the church, head held high and eyes ahead. Suzue was waiting for him by the door, she was dressed in a beautiful black dress that fit her form perfectly, a black sun hat was perched in her head as she looked at him with a gentle smile. He tried to return it, but it was hard with how painfully his heart seemed to be beating. She was holding two bright red roses, and as he finally reached her, she extended her hand and handed him one, he gladly took it and inspected it for any imperfections, even though he knew there would be none, everything was to be perfect for Daisuke today. And Daisuke himself will probably look perfect too and he is waiting inside right now.
Haru takes one last deep breath before taking a step forward into the church. The inside is quiet and empty, Suzue in there, by his side as he walks forward. His heart seems to have stopped, it was quiet, frozen with an emotion he knew not how to name. There at the end, Daisuke was waiting for him, so he took a step forward and kept moving on through the sober atmosphere that seemed to lay heavy within the room.
He seemed to be almost suffocating when he finally reached the summit. God, this was really it wasn’t it? Tears sprang to his eyes, it really was. A quiet sob broke out his mouth, as he looked into the open casket, Daisuke looked beautiful, like he always did, his hair fell perfectly around him and his clothes really did fit him in all the right ways. His eyes were closed, never to open again, locked in an eternal sleep. Haru reached forward and placed the red rose in Daisuke’s hand, it was the right choice he decided, the red roses and black velvet sounding Daisuke looked glamours around his resting form, even in death, he looked like he owned the place. Haru let out a choked laugh, god, this was a goodbye, and he wasn’t ready, not now, not ever.
He leaned forward and let his forehead against Diasuke’s, it was a sickly cold feeling, it felt so wrong and forging. A few tears stained Daisuke’s face and Haru whipped them away before finally reaching into his pocket and pulled out a black box, it was meant to be a birthday gift one that would hopefully mean that every next birthday they could spend together, but now? Now Haru didn’t think that would be possible, a new wave of tears trailed down his face before he finally found his voice.
“I was meant to give it to you for your birthday you know? I spent so long looking for the perfect one, god, so many hours, but I really don’t mind, I am sorry I couldn’t be there, maybe then you’d still be here with me, god I am so so sorry Daisuke, please, where ever you go, please forgive me.”
He placed the box by Daisuke’s hands before placing a single kiss on his cold temple before finally straightening out. He looked at Suzue, she had unshed tears shining in her eyes as she waited for her turn to say her final goodbyes. Haru took a deep breath be for stepping down and walking away. But just as he did a voice reached him.
“ He would have said yes.”
He snapped his head around, looking Suzue right in her eyes as she took her place by the coffin. He took a laboured breath and walked away, not knowing that a golden ring with a blazing diamond now shone on Daisuke’s still fingers.