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Taking King back to their tent was something that Ram didn’t need to think about. Even when the senior kept pushing his help away, Ram was a creature of habit, especially when it came to King. Although things seemed to be relatively peaceful, thick tension immediately surrounded them the moment King opened his mouth.
He told Ram to stay away, yelled at him to leave, and adamantly claimed that he didn’t want to see his face. While he wanted to respect his wishes, he had to understand his reasoning.
So he never stopped asking why.
King was suffering. He had to hold himself back whenever Ram was near him? And that restraint was causing him so much pain that the only solution in his mind was, for Ram to keep his distance?
Was he happy now that he knew why? As he stumbled back, his brain didn’t know how to process it. Their feelings were mutual, which made Ram’s heart sing, but for some reason, King couldn’t completely process or understand them, couldn’t accept them. If that was true, did they really reciprocate each other’s feelings?
Was he really happy now that he knew why? Succinctly, the answer was both yes and no. Ram couldn’t be truly happy with that reasoning, yet something in his chest fluttered.
He silently pleaded with the other, hoping that maybe something in him would change.
As they were staring at each other, he’d expected the elder to continue that restraint, to continue pushing him away and try to smother that internal agony. However, King seemed to understand what Ram was trying to say, what he wanted. Something in his eyes flickered. Ram felt the hand slide itself behind his neck, and before he could completely realize what was happening, he was kissing the senior.
Both of their lips were initially stiff, overwhelmed by the excessive pressure of them being joined together. Ram actively welcomed the newfound warmth, taking comfort in the proximity he had missed.
(Even twenty-four hours was too long for him to be away from this man.)
After a few moments, they gradually relaxed and fell into an easy pace. The kiss projected passion and a slew of unspoken but intense emotions. Together, they seemed to bring energy to the atmosphere, This, Ram, for some reason, felt more comfortable doing. Rather than verbally professing his adoration for King, he hoped that these kisses and caresses would be enough for the senior to understand. Ram let his hand move up to cradle his cheek. Tufts of hair tickled his fingertips and the skin became hot under his palm.
King was the first to pull away with deep but slow breaths. He pressed their foreheads together. His thumb brushed softly against his cheekbones. The situation felt all too surreal. Ram wanted to open his eyes, but was afraid to break the spell for himself. Instead, he imagined the face he had grown accustomed to seeing every day, that cared for him and understood him. Eyes that lit up at the mention of his favorite plant, cheeks that reddened whenever Ram did something sweet but unexpected, a mouth that seemed to always be smiling. He could go on forever.
Their noses brushed each others’ lightly, and it sparked Ram into action, to gently but firmly guide their lips to meet again. King’s arms moved up to cross behind his neck, pulling Ram impossibly closer to his body. He let his arm, previously resting lightly on his knee, to move up and wrap around the other’s waist. Breathless, Ram broke the kiss. Seeing the senior chase after him, immediately initiated a fuzziness at the pit of his stomach.
King stared up at him, looking more dazed than before, gaze tinged slightly with lust. His lips were red and slightly wet. Lewd thoughts flooded Ram’s mind, but before his mind pushed him to go too far he remembered that King was very drunk.
“Are you okay?” Ram asked, brushing a couple of strands of hair out of his eyes.
In a switch of their roles, King took a hold of his wrist and pulled it away from his face. While everything else was still, his eyes kept flickering around his face, constantly searching for something. After what felt like forever, he ended his exploration and dropped his wrist.
“I’m tired,” King yawned. Ram unwinded his arm from around the elder and moved to the right side of the tent, out of habit. He jokingly pat the spot next to him on the mat. King, slouched over, eyes squinting at him, nodded lightly.
He crawled over and set his head on Ram’s bicep.
“You have a pillow right there,” he joked, although he didn’t want him to actually move.
King rambled something unintelligible, lightly slapping the back of his hand onto and digging his head into Ram’s chest.
Although he’s facing King, he can only see the crown of his head. His hand reaches out to pat the soft hair lightly like he’s always wanted to do. In a matter of minutes, he heard light snoring from the elder. Ram let himself indulge in pressing a soft kiss to the crown of his King’s head before also falling asleep.
Everything was so perfect. He didn’t realize having an empty space next to him when he woke up would be such a bad omen.
Ram can’t help but be hurt by the look of relief on King’s face when he doesn’t immediately correct him about last night. He had words put into his mouth, that he was so drunk that he immediately passed out after Tee’s card game. But there’s no way he could forget kissing King; the memory would be seared in his brain.
Why did King treat last night like it had never happened? Did he forget what happened last night? There’s no way if the panic in his voice meant anything. And their goodbye had felt too mundane for their circumstances. Just an “I’ll see you back at the condo.”
After the car is out of sight, Ram texts King, telling him the truth: he hadn’t been drunk last night.
If the sentence isn't enough for King to realize that Ram also has romantic feelings for him, else he wouldn't have consciously reciprocated the kiss (realistically, he knows it probably isn't, but a man can hope), at least they had a couple of days to collect their thoughts before they had to confront each other.
Until then, Ram knew he would keep pondering why.