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December 3rd.
A day fresh in Jinsoul’s mind.
She had been over at Jungeun’s house, like she so often was, just lazing around with the younger girl.
It was like a daydream to her.
Laying next to Jungeun, wrapped in her red sweater, letting the world pass them by.
“It looks so much better on you,” Jungeun had sighed, turning on her side and facing the older girl. She tugged at the sleeve of the sweater before her eyes drifted back up to Jinsoul’s.
Jinsoul found herself lost in Jungeun’s eyes, her face flushing at the comment.
If only Jungeun knew how much that had meant to her.
She would never know how much it meant to her, though.
Not when she looked at Jiwoo like that.
The eyes she was so enraptured with were trained on Jungeun’s bright and bouncy best friend.
The living personification of the sun, a sight for sore eyes.
Of course Jungeun had fallen for Jiwoo, the girl was brighter than a clear blue sky.
Jungeun deserved her, she deserved the best.
Jinsoul was content to sit by and watch her be mesmerized by Jiwoo.
Even if it killed her on the inside.
-
It wasn’t really a surprise when weeks later, Jungeun and Jiwoo we’re officially together.
Jinsoul had resigned herself to the fact that she’d never have a chance with Jungeun, she was happy for the girl.
Well, she tried to be happy, at least.
Watching Jiwoo skip by Jungeun’s side, though, wearing a familiar red sweater-
Jinsoul just tried not to watch.
She had crammed herself into the corner of a party, scanning the crowd for anything that could keep her eyes away from seeing Jiwoo’s hand slip into Jungeun’s. Away from Jungeun’s arm slinging over Jiwoo’s shoulder.
Her eyes found nothing, though. And so they followed as Jiwoo broke away from Jungeun.
As always, and especially in the obnoxious party scene, Jiwoo was a sight for sore eyes. Beautiful in every way. She was an absolute angel.
Jinsoul couldn’t help but wish she was dead.
“Jinsoul!”
Tearing her eyes away from Jiwoo, Sooyoung stood in front of her, a sort of half smirk on her face. She leaned onto the wall beside Jinsoul.
“Sooyoung,” Jinsoul tried to return the smile, but it didn’t reach her eyes.
Sooyoung noticed.
After all, her smile wasn’t exactly real either.
“Hey, wanna get out of here?” Sooyoung asked, offering a hand, “This party kind of blows.”
Jinsoul could see through the offer from a mile away.
What did it matter though? It wouldn’t hurt to make out in the back of Sooyoung’s car for the rest of the night. Not like she was doing any good at this party.
She took Sooyoung’s hand and let herself get pulled out of the house.
She didn’t manage to see Jungeun’s eyes following her out the door.
-
jungie❤️ • 2:41 AM
Where are you, Soul?
jungie❤️ • 2:43 AM
I saw you leave with Sooyoung, but I need to know you’re okay.
jungie❤️ • 2:45 AM
Jinsoul, I’m starting to get really worried.
6:48 AM
She locked her phone screen, pulling Sooyoung’s jacket tighter around her.
Burgundy was close enough to red anyway.
-
soulie💙 • 12:17 AM
sooyoung’s place
soulie💙 • 12:18 AM
sorry i didn’t answer yesterday
soulie💙 • 12:18 AM
more tired than i thought i’d be
soulie💙 • 12:19 AM
pick me up?
Jinsoul was in Jungeun’s car within minutes.
“Why’d you run off with Sooyoung anyway? I thought you were riding back home with me and Jiwoo,” Jungeun asked, eyes trained on the road.
Jinsoul didn’t answer.
“What were you even up to, disappearing for a whole day?! I was really worried about you, y’know…” Jungeun whined, her eyes flickering over to Jinsoul.
The older girl’s head remained leaned up against the window, her eyes trained on the stars above them.
“Okay, what’s wrong with you? You don’t normally act like this,” Jungeun prompted her for the third time.
Jinsoul still never turned back to her.
“Jinsoul-“ Jungeun started.
“Why would you ever kiss me?” Jinsoul mumbled, cutting her off, just loud enough for Jungeun to hear. Her sniffling was heard clear as day as she continued, “I’m not even half as beautiful as Jiwoo is…”
“Wh.. What are you say-?” Jungeun was cut off again, just as quickly.
“You gave her your sweater,” Jinsoul wiped viciously at the tears that streamed down her face, “It- It’s just some piece of fabric! I know! But you like her so much better… I wish I were Jiwoo!”
“Jinsoul, I don’t-“ and for the last time, Jinsoul cut Jungeun off.
“We’re here.”
The car stopped abruptly.
“Thanks for taking me home, Jungeun,” Jinsoul spoke stiffly, as she quickly exited the car.
“Soul, wait!” Jungeun tried to get the girl to stop as she rushed to get inside, ignoring her calls as she continued to wipe at her tears.
Jinsoul slammed the door shut behind her and slid downward onto the floor. She cried into her knees, slowly drifting off there as she ran out of energy and tears.
-
Ding Dong
The doorbell jerked Jinsoul awake, and she fell out of her bed, groaning loudly.
She had spent the better part of a week inside, holed away and making music, just trying her best to not think about any of her friends.
She should’ve known that wouldn’t last.
She creeped out of her room into the main entrance, glaring at the front door as if it had rung itself. She shuffled forward to the door and looked through the peephole. Seeing no one, her eyes drifted down to the front step, where a package awaited her.
Cautiously, she opened the door and crouched down to examine the semi opened package. She lifted the box’s flaps, and gasped to see a familiar red sweater.
“Look to your right.” A note lying on top of the sweater read.
Lifting the sweater out of the box, and standing up once more, she followed the direction and turned her head.
There sat Jungeun, on her little garden bench, a nervous smile on her face.
“Please come talk to me, Soul,” the girl pleaded.
Jinsoul couldn’t find it in herself to refuse.
She sat beside Jungeun on the bench, her gaze trained on the ground, refusing to meet her eyes.
The silence was clearly killing the both of them.
Jungeun cleared her throat, hoping to draw Jinsoul’s eyes towards her. When it didn’t work, she spoke anyway.
“I broke up with Jiwoo…”
Jinsoul shot up, looking at Jungeun wide eyed.
“But- But you guys love each other! How-? Why-?”
Jungeun shushed her gently before speaking up once more.
“Well… Jiwoo- She’s great. I do love her, but… not how I thought I did. Jinsoul, talking to you made me realize…” Jungeun paused, taking in a deep breath.
Jinsoul felt her breath catch in her throat, she knew what was coming next, but it didn’t feel real.
“I love you, Jinsoul. You’ve always looked better than anyone in this sweater,” Jungeun clutched her hands tightly, staring straight into her eyes as she spoke, “Please, never compare yourself to Jiwoo- or anyone else- because you’re breathtaking, Soul, you’re beautiful.”
She could feel tears rolling down her face again, and she sniffled, hugging Jungeun tightly and crying into her shoulder.
Jungeun hugged her back just as tightly, rubbing her back gently.
It felt nice to have the sweater back in her arms.
-
The next year, early December (the 3rd to be exact), two girls walked through the park.
Their hands were joined together, as they walked without a care in the world.
Jinsoul snuggled into a familiar red sweater, and pulled Jungeun closer to her, to share its warmth.