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Jack’s scared of what comes after graduation. He knows he shouldn't be, shouldn't even be thinking of it yet, projecting farther than he can even influence at this point and probably doing more harm than good. He can’t quite quiet it though, the pulse of nerves, thinking of being an NHL prospect and then a player, a new team, because there’s no way he’s going to get picked up by the Habs, and new people, even if he does get a stroke of luck that let’s him get drafted by his home team. People all familiar with each other, except for a few other rookies like Jack, all a couple years younger from getting taken up fresh at eighteen, instead of treading water on a college team.
He’s afraid of what’s to come, but he’s also afraid of what he’s leaving behind.
His team, the ones that elected him captain even when he’s fairly certain he doesn't deserve it, behind him in wins and losses and without pinning the blame on him, even in the times he deserves it. Ransom and Holster, practically made to have the and constantly hooking them together, Ransom also a Canadian and Holster with his stupid glasses and both of them with their exasperation with his pop culture knowledge and the bunk bed in the attic. Shitty, wandering around the house waxing philosophical on entrenched gender views in society, half the time naked. (That part Jack won’t miss so much, even as used to a lack of consciousness about nudity that locker rooms produce.) Lardo, level headed but easily keeping up with the rest of them, the best manager the team could ask for, one of the few things that eases Jack a little in leaving the team behind, knowing it’s in good hands. The frogs, even if they've only been here a year, a rambunctious bickering mess, but still team.
And Bittle, Bitty, centring his line and popping up pies everywhere when Jack can’t even fathom how he could manage to make one, Bitty across the hall and singing songs in the shower that Jack’s hopeless to recognize. Bitty, the smallest player he knows with a lingering fear of checks, one Jack feels apprehensive leaving him with, especially after working with him through it, especially after last years final. They’d nearly lost Bitty then, and it scares him to lose him now, by choice but not by will.
He doesn't know what that means, and that scares him a bit too.