Chapter Text
(Mid November)
Thor pulled up to the gates of SHIELD’s home for the mentally ill, everything he had read or heard about the place made it seem pleasant enough. It wasn’t an expensive posh place that cost thousands and thousands of dollars a year but it was better than some of the other asylums out there. The patients were treated like human beings instead of burdens to the population and Thor had to admit that a place like that was somewhere he wanted to work.
It was a new beginning for Thor, he had switched from being a private psychiatrist in a posh building in town to being a consulting doctor at the facility run by a certain N.Fury. When he had announced the news to his friends and family, they hadn’t quite understood why he wanted to give up such an employment and take this one but they remained supportive of his decision nonetheless.
He rolled down his window and smiled at the guard who stepped out of the small booth. The man didn’t seem all that friendly, he didn’t even offer a polite smile to which Thor had to admit it dampened his mood slightly.
“Good morning,” Thor greeted happily, his perfect jolly smile in place, “I’m Doctor Thor Odinson, I’m-”
“The new psychiatrist, yeah,” the man cut in rudely, “drive up to the main building, there’s an employee car park on the left, park there.”
Before Thor could even thank the man he was back in his booth and pressed down on a button opening the large iron gates.
Driving slowly up the slight hill, the building came into view. He had to admit it didn’t look anything like he had imagined. He expected a dark gloomy tall standing building, which was ridiculous since he had seen the photos online, instead he was met with a red brick building. He remembered reading somewhere that it had been built back in the early 20’s, it would have looked almost homely if not for the metal bars on all the windows.
Thor parked his car and got out, he adjusted his scarf and closed his coat, the weather had gotten colder over the last few days. Thor reckoned that it would get colder by the day, maybe it would start snowing soon. His lips curled a little at the thought of snow as he headed towards the large double doors. Before entering he looked around for a brief moment, admiring the leafless trees that lined the long driveway and the green that went from the edge of the parking lot to the gates.
“Good morning, I’m Doctor Odinson,” Thor greeted as he stood before the front desk, hopefully this time he would get a more polite response.
“Morning,” The man at the desk greeted as he looked up from his computer screen, “I’m Scott,” He added with a small smile.
His eyes went back to the screen where he clicked and typed away a little, then giving another smile, turning his attention back to Thor.
“Director Fury would like to see you before you get started,” He said as he motioned to a woman who waltzed over.
“Morning Doctor Odinson,” She greeted as she held out a slender hand for him to shake.
Thor took her hand and shook it, noticing how firm her shake was. Her smile was sharp as she looked him over before straightening slightly, more if that was even possible.
“And you are?” He asked, raising a brow to the woman.
She smirked, “Agent Romanov, head of security here at SHIELD,” She gave a nod to Scott then turned on her heel, “This way,” She called over her shoulder and led the way.
It was quiet out here in the main building, a soft elevator music played quietly in the halls as the staff walked to their various destinations, it was all quite relaxing if Thor was honest.
They walked down a long pastel yellow hallway, he watched the way Agent Romanov walked, filled with confidence and posture, a woman who knew what she had to do and where she was going.
“Tell me,” She said, her voice cutting through the pleasant silence, “What brings you here to join our family?”
Thor cleared his throat before answering, “Well, after several years of consulting in the busy city, I felt the need to change.”
She nodded slightly clearly waiting for him to elaborate on the subject.
“And I have heard many good things about this place, I wanted to give it a shot… I want to help,”
Although he couldn’t see her face he could tell she was smiling or at least smirking. They remained silent until they arrived in front of a glass door with the words Director N Fury printed on it in thick black letters.
“He may seem intimidating at first but really he is a teddy bear,” Agent Romanov said as she knocked on the door, “That is providing he likes you,” she added with a smirk.
Before anyone answered she turned on her heel and headed off down the hall, Thor watched her then slowly turned his head back to the door. It opened and he came face to face with someone he was sure wasn’t Director Fury.
“You must be Doctor Odinson, I’m Phil, Fury’s assistant” The man greeted as he removed his glasses from his nose, “Come in and take a seat, Fury will be with you in a moment,”
Thor smiled politely and went over to the gray cotton couch. The room was absolutely silent except for the light sound of Phil scribbling away at something at his desk.
All of five minutes must have passed before a thick wooden door opened and a dark skinned man stepped out. Thor wet his lips as their gaze met, he understood what Romanov had meant by her earlier statement.
“Hello Doctor Odinson,” He greeted sharply, his voice dug into Thor’s being and for a moment he felt like he was back in highschool, waiting at the principal’s office after a school brawl.
“Good morning Director Fury,” He offered with a pleasant smile as he stood from his sitting position and headed over to the man.
They went into his office and Thor was offered a seat at the large wooden desk. He watched as Fury walked, his heavy footsteps sounding on the tiled floor before he took his place opposite Thor. Complete silence filled the air other than the only sound being the aged leather moving beneath Fury as he got comfortable. His piercing gaze didn’t leave Thor’s and for a long moment nothing was said.
“First of all, Welcome,” Fury said although his voice didn’t seem all that welcoming.
Thor nodded, his cheerful smile spreading over his lips.
“When I received your CV I was a little surprised you wanted to come work for us,”
Fury didn’t need to explain why he was surprised, Thor was a reputed psychiatrist and had some important patients in the city.
“I suppose I should be completely honest with you,” It seemed like a very good thing to do, Fury didn’t look like the sort of person to appreciate finding things out later.
The other man nodded,
“I enjoyed my work, no lie there but I felt I could do more, help other kinds of people,” Saying it out loud it sounded stupid.
Fury nodded again but remained silent.
“And when I found out that you were looking for a replacement psychiatrist I jumped at the occasion.”
“I’m glad you did, I hope your work is as good as your reputation,”
There was something in Fury’s voice that made Thor feel a little uncomfortable, like a lot of pressure had suddenly been added to his shoulders to succeed.
They went over the ground rules, never forget or lose his keys, only use his set, never get too involved with the patients and certainly no physical contact with them. The logical rules for a facility that housed the mentally ill.
Work hours were the next thing on the agenda, Thor surprised his new employer when he admitted that putting in extra hours didn’t scare him. He enjoyed his profession and would do his best whenever he could, and the plus being that he was somewhat of a workaholic.
Fury told Thor he would have his permanent patients with one hour sessions every day, those that were likely to never leave this place, then there would be some short term patients. On occasion he would fill in for the other doctors if needed. Thor nodded happily and agreed to it all, he was starting to buzz with excitement to actually start his new job and meet his new co-workers.
“Do you have any questions?” Fury asked once he finished explaining everything, Thor shook his head, everything seemed pretty clear, “Perfect, Coulson will show you around,”
Thor nodded and stood when Fury did. He exited the office, all he needed to do was find this Coulson. Apparently he must have looked a little lost since Phil walked over and smiled.
“Something wrong Doctor Odinson?”
He lifted his gaze and smiled in reply, “I’m supposed to find a Coulson?”
Phil let out a small chuckle, “That would be me, I’m Phil Coulson. Ready for the grand tour?”
Thor smiled back to the man and nodded before they left the office and headed off down the hall.
They started with the ground floor, Phil showed Thor the cafeteria, the HR office, Natasha’s office was in case he ever needed it. Whilst there Phil explained that there were cameras all over the building for everyone’s security, he would have let Natasha go more into detail but she wasn’t currently in her office.
“Before I forget,” Phil said as he opened one of the folders he had been carrying around with him, “Here, this is your panic button, use it if one of the patient's attack you or any other life threatening situation,”
Thor took it, looked it over then he placed it gently into his coat pocket,
“It had a GPS on it, so any one of our agents will be able to find you if needed,” Phil informed before handing Thor one of the files, “This one is your schedule, inside you’ll find a timetable, your patients names… I have already put their files in your office,”
“Thank you for prepping my office Phil,” Thor said honestly with a kind smile.
Phil flashed a quick smile then handed over another file, this one thinner than the last, “And this one is a copy of the rules, just in case you want to go over them again,”
There came a small jingle of keys before Phil pulled a set out of his pocket and handed them over to Thor.
“They’re all tagged, don’t lose them,”
Thor slid the second file under the first, before placing his keys into his pocket and nodded, “Where do we go from here?”
“This way, I’ll show you the first floor where you’ll be working alongside Doctor Stark,”
They walked up a flight of stairs instead of using the lift, Thor didn’t mind he preferred to use his legs anyway.
“This is the blue wing, we currently only have two patients residing here but I’m sure there will be more soon,” Phil said as he walked them around the small ward, there were only four bedrooms making it look homey and not too busy which was probably good for the patients.
“Are all the wards this small?” Thor asked as his eyes looked around the hall before landing on Phil.
The man nodded in response, “they are, we have four wards each with four rooms,”
It didn’t take Thor long to do the maths, sixteen patients per floor, there were a total of five floors, so the hospital had the capacity to hold eighty patients at one time.
“Down the hall you’ll find the red, yellow and green wings, and just over there is the common room,” Phil said pointing down the opposite ends of the hall, “There are three other floors above this one identical, then there is the fifth and final floor which is home to the criminally insane,”
Ah, Thor had almost forgotten that SHIELD’s home for the mentally ill housed some of the state’s criminally ill.
“Of course, how many patients are there on that floor?”
“Thirty”
He was wrong, a total of ninety four patients could be held in SHIELD’s.
Thor declined the offer to check out the other floors given that they were identical to this one and he didn’t have the clearance to go to the fifth floor.
“And this is your office,” Phil said as he opened the wooden door, “it’s probably smaller than what you’re used to but it should work,”
Thor couldn’t help the smile that graced his lips, “It doesn’t matter about the size, as long as it has everything I need to work it’ll be fine,”
“That’s good to hear,” Phil added, “I’ll leave you to it, if you need anything call the front desk and they’ll wire you to me,”
Thor was about to ask for the number but Phil pointed to the telephone and the list of numbers sitting tidily beside it.
“Thank you,” was all Thor said before his colleague shut the door quietly and left him to it.
Once alone Thor removed his woolen coat and hung it up then took a seat at his desk and booted up his computer, thankfully someone, probably Phil, had thought to leave a username and password jotted down on a post-it beside the keyboard.
There were several files as promised sitting on his desk, waiting for him. He picked up the first one and opened it.
A couple of hours passed before he had finished going over each file, the reasons behind his patients entry to the hospital were simple enough. After all there were two basic reasons anyone would be put in psychiatric care, either you’re a threat to yourself or to others.
He took his time reading over the files again, some he even read a third time before he stood from where he had been sitting and walked out of his office to get a proper feel of the place.
It wasn’t long till he found himself entering the common room of their floor, there were only a couple of patients present, Thor guessed that the others were probably in sessions or in their rooms.
“You must be the newbie,” Came a voice from the side causing Thor to turn, a blond haired man smiled at him, “I’m Steve,”
“Thor,” He offered, “Are you also a doctor here?”
Thor knew no one here so he’d only learn by asking, maybe this was the Doctor Stark Phil had spoken about.
The man chuckled and shook his head, “No, I’m a carer. You’ve got me, Sam and Peter on this floor,” He explained with a smile, “The doctors would be, Tony and you,”
Thor nodded, “Oh, I thought maybe you were Doctor Stark,”
Again Steve chuckled although this time it was slightly louder, “Oh goodness no, you’ll know who Tony is the moment you meet him… trust me,”
Steve’s attention seemed to waver, his bright smile fading as his gaze moved to something behind Thor. He turned, seeing a man in what looked like pyjamas leaning against the wall, his longish hair was a little untidy, probably from hands going through it. He seemed about their age, although he looked a little more worn than either Steve or Thor. He did notice the prosthetic hand that poked out of the long sleeve of the man’s left side.
“Bucky, what are you doing?” Steve asked calmly although clearly surprised to see the young man.
He seemed to come out of his daze when Steve spoke and looked to the blond man, “looking for something,” He replied a little absent, a frown etched on his face.
Thor watched as Steve moved to Bucky and put a gentle arm around him.
“Everything is okay Buck,” Steve’s voice was warm and caring which made Thor think that he had already broken the rule about getting friendly with the patients.
Bucky frowned but didn’t protest when Steve walked him to one of the chairs and sat him down, kneeling down in front of him.
“You’ll be fine Buck, just take a few deep breaths.” He said as he caressed Bucky’s left knee gently, squeezing it almost lovingly. Steve stood back up after a moment and turned to walk back over to Thor but the young man grabbed his wrist, looking up at him with big worried grey blue eyes.
“Don’t go Steve,” He whispered desperately.
“I’ll be right back, Buck, I’ve just got to finish talking to Dr Odinson over here,” He said reassuringly.
The man looked over at Thor, his eyes weren’t focused which made Thor believe he was heavily medicated.
He didn’t reply but he did let go of Steve’s wrist allowing him to walk away, his hand hovered in the air for a moment longer before he let it drop into his lap.
Steve came back over and smiled apologetically, “Sorry about that,”
Thor shook his head and offered a smile of his own, “It’s good to see a carer caring, you two seem close”
He noticed how Steve’s smile faded a little, “I know it’s against the rules but over the years it just sort of happened,”
Steve’s voice was a little pleading, clearly he didn’t want it to be common knowledge but Thor was already pretty sure everyone knew if he was able to notice it in the few short minutes he had been here.
“Hey as long as it doesn’t affect your work I don’t see where the problem is,”
His smile was back in place which in turn made Thor smile.
“Steve?!” Came a distressed voice from behind them causing both of them to turn, Bucky was now standing looking anxiously towards them, “Do you hear them?” He was talking a little louder this time as if trying to talk over other people.
His eyes darted around the room in a panic, Steve’s smile vanished, he excused himself before heading to the clearly upset man. Thor watched, he didn’t remember reading anything about a Bucky in his files so for the moment it really wasn’t his place. Besides, Steve seemed to know how to handle him and if he ever needed any help Thor would step in.
“It’s okay Buck,” he said calmly as he wrapped an arm around the man’s shoulders, “They’re not really there Buck, come on, focus,”
It took a couple of minutes of Steve hushing calming words to the patient who in turn kept protesting that there were in fact people talking to him but eventually he calmed and Steve was able to get him to sit down again.
“James?” They heard from the door of the common room.
Thor saw the change in Steve’s face, it hardened as he looked over at the person who had spoken.
“Yes Sir,” He said as he stood suddenly taking his stance as a soldier awaiting an order, his arms at his sides and standing straight gaze focused ahead of him.
“No Buck-”
“I’ll take it from here Rogers,” Came the voice from just behind Thor, apparently he had seen the whole ordeal.
Steve stood stubbornly and after a few moments he moved away, reluctantly nonetheless, it was clear there was some tension between the two men.
“Don’t go upping his meds,” Steve growled as he passed the newcomer, and walked out of the room.
The other man simply scoffed, “Remind me which of us two is the doctor?” He called out sarcastically after Steve but not actually turning his head to look at him.
After a couple of moments he turned his attention to Thor who was standing there trying to work out what had just happened.
“You must be Thor,” He said suddenly with a smirk, “Tony,” He offered before heading over to Bucky who was still standing in front of the sofa looking down the hall after Steve who had long since disappeared.
“I think you might benefit from a little sleep James,” Tony said as he moved over to the young man and began to accompany him down the hall to his room before coming back over to Thor, “A soldier or rather ex soldier” he said as if that explained it all.
“PTSD?” Thor asked as he raised a brow curiously,
Tony nodded, “He couldn’t deal with coming back to the real world,”
He seemed a little harsh in his words but then again some psychiatrists lacked compassion or empathy towards their patients.
“He seems to have found a friend,” Thor commented casually, he frowned when Tony chuckled.
“A friend,” his voice laced with hollow humor, “Barnes is attracted to Rogers, follows him around like a lost puppy,”
Thor chose to remain silent on that, he thought it better.
“Excuse me, I have-”
“Things to do, yeah yeah don’t we all, go for it,” Tony waved a hand at Thor dismissing him.
Thor went back to his office and began on getting things ready for his afternoon not to mention it also gave him an excuse to kill half an hour before lunch.
He made his way down to the cafeteria where he bought a simple meat sandwich and bottle of water. The woman on the till seemed nice, she smiled at him and wished him a good afternoon before he headed back to his office where he would eat and go through some of his emails.
“Dr. Odinson,” Natasha's voice rung, stopping him from leaving the hall, he turned and smiled at the woman who was putting her tray on top of the bins.
“Mrs Romanoff,” He greeted for the second time that day with a polite smile.
She smiled shyly which seemed out of character for her, “Miss, I’m not married,” She corrected.
Thor cleared throat, “My apologies,”
He waited as she walked over to him then they began to head down the hall together,
“You’re not eating in the hall?” She said gesturing to the sandwich and bottle he held in his hand.
Thor shook his head, “I’m not trying to be rude but I want to get some work in whilst I eat,” He explained to which she nodded simply.
“Fury said you seemed eager,”
He didn’t know if he should take that as a compliment or not, Thor just wanted to help his patients and the best way to do that was getting to know their files by heart.
“I’ve always enjoyed working,” He said casually as they continued to walk. Natasha nodded again this time a small smirk appeared on his plush lips.
“We’re going to need that enthousiasme around here, how are you finding it so far?” She questioned.
Thor thought about it for a few moments before he answered, “In all honesty I haven’t been able to get an opinion yet. I haven’t started meeting patients yet although I did meet Bucky,”
Natasha quirked a brow, “Ah yes Barnes,”
Thor stopped as he placed a large but gentle hand on her arm and looked at her with a questioning gaze, “Is there something I should know about him?”
She shook her head lightly and gently removed Thor’s hand from her arm, silently beginning to walk again as he followed.
“No,” She replied flatly, “Although I expect you’ll become rather fond of him as most of the staff have over time,”
That made Thor feel slightly better, the last thing he wanted to hear was Bucky was some sort of a trouble maker or something along those lines.
“Is that a bad thing?” He asked as they neared the end of the hall where Thor would take the lift to his floor.
She stopped this time and smiled, “Not really no,” She replied frankly although she seemed to think about it from the way her head tilted ever so slightly to the side, “Have a good afternoon Thor,” Natasha added before disappearing down the conjoining hallway.
He watched her go with a curious expression staining his features before shaking his head and walking away.
Over the next few hours Thor met with his patients then started some of his sessions with a few of them. He wanted to get an idea of their mental well being before treating them, some of his new patients were highly medicated. Thor didn’t agree with medicating when it wasn’t utterly necessary, the medication didn’t address the problem but more camouflage it.
*
It wasn’t until much later when he looked at his watch as he was taking a small break from taking notes and filling out paperwork that he realised it was well past midnight. He stretched his back as he let out a peaceful sigh, not bad for a first day of work. He packed up his things and shut down his computer before making his way down to the lobby, the place was empty except for the guard at the desk.
“Night,” Thor said as he headed out.
“You too Doctor,”
The apartment was empty when he got home, like always, there was no one waiting for him. It had been like that for the past couple of years, Jane had left. In her words, he didn’t know when to stop working. Thor hadn’t been present a lot during their five year relationship, he just didn’t have the time, he loved his work possibly more than he had loved Jane.
He wasn’t lonely, sure he lived alone but it didn’t bother him. The bright side of being single was that no one imposed their wants on him, and didn't express how they wanted him to change or any of that other stuff. Although sometimes he did wonder how his parents had done it, they had been married thirty-four years and they had made it work even though his father hadn’t been present a lot either. Odin and Frigga’s marriage was something Thor had always admired. They had married when she had been only eighteen, Odin’s family had said their marriage was doomed to fail because of her young age but they had proved them wrong. Two years later they welcomed Balder into the family and three years after that Thor. Odin’s mother had insisted that they hire a nanny but Frigga had put things straight, no one was going to bring her children up but her. Odin had always joked saying it was Frigga finally standing up to Bestla that had killed the old woman because that very night she passed away.
Odin’s side of the family was rich, sickly rich from a family firm, it had been in the family since the late 1800’s. Balder took over when Odin had died since he was the eldest, which Thor was thankful for, he had never wanted to work in the family business. If he was completely honest, he wasn’t even sure what the family business was all about.
When they were growing up Odin was absent a lot, he worked hours around the clock, he even worked on Christmas. The boys knew their father loved them but they learned to live without him, it was only when Balder went to work for Odin at the family firm when he was eighteen that he got to see him more often.
Thor took a deep breath as he walked over to the fridge opening it, even though it was six years ago the pain was still there, Odin’s death had been sudden and unexpected.
“Spaghetti bolognese I think,” He muttered, distracting himself as he grabbed some tomatoes, onions and other things out of the fridge.
A couple of years ago Thor had started taking an interest in cooking as a way to unwind from the stress of work and much to his surprise he was getting rather good at it.
He hummed his way through the preparations and while it was cooking he poured himself a glass of cold beer. Thor liked beer, every Christmas Balder would get him a selection of different beers from around the world, which meant that he had a small collection.