Chapter Text
“I’m gay.”
Victor watches his family’s faces. Pilar moves to stand next to him, her face stoic. She grabs his arm, squeezing once, anchoring them together as family.
His mother drops her wine glass, leaving it to spill across the carpet. His father’s mouth opens once, closes, then opens again.
Victor wills them to speak, to say something, do something. He can’t keep smoothing everything over. He needs them to fix something, for once.
“Mijo, what...” His mother starts, trailing off. “Where did this come from?”
He swallows, once. “I’ve been confused about it for awhile, and recently I’ve been through some stuff that helped me figure it out.”
“What about Mia? Was any of that even real?” His father asks, clenching his fingers around his wine glass, and Victor really wishes people would stop asking him that.
“Of course it was real. I love her, but I’m just not attracted to her that way. We can’t be a couple anymore.” He says, trying to carefully place his words.
His father throws his hands up in the air. “I don’t understand this. One minute, you’re bringing your girlfriend home to meet us, and the next minute, you’re telling us that you’re, you’re-“
“Armando.” His mother cuts him off. “Give him a chance to explain.”
“No.” Victor says, with more force than he expected. “I don’t have to explain anything. I’m gay. I’m attracted to men, that’s me.”
His father stutters, scrambling for words.
“But we never expected- I mean, you never showed any sign-“
“You guys don’t get to act like this.” Pilar says, not yelling for once. Instead, her voice is steady, full of low rage.
“Victor messed up,” she continues. “But not for being gay. He’s made a lot of mistakes recently, but he needed to make them to find out who he is. I don’t even know everything, but I know that he was scared, and you guys don’t get to tell him how to act.”
“Pilar-“ her mother starts.
“No!” Pilar yells, finally losing her composure. “You guys don’t get to rip our family apart to keep your stupid secrets because it’s ‘best for us’ and then talk like that to Victor for doing what’s best for him!”
Victor looks at his sister, stunned, and then down to her fingers, still clenched around his arm. He’s more than grateful for her in that moment.
“How dare you talk to your mother that way,” their father starts.
“No, no, Armando, let me.” She says. “Victor, Mia is a great girl, she doesn’t deserve to be treated like this. Does she even know? About... this?”
He looks at his feet, then back at his northern. “She knows.” He says, barely more than a whisper.
“I... cheated on her.” He continues, trying to ignore the betrayal on his parents’ faces.
“I meant to shut it down as soon as I knew who I was, but it got complicated with her home life, and that gave me an opportunity to be scared. But I met someone. Someone I care about, really deeply, and I can’t lose him. So no matter what you say, I’m going to see him.”
His father looks furious, his mother lost. “Who even is this... boy?”
“He was at my party. He was with someone else at the time, but he’s not anymore. I want to be with him, and I think he wants me, too.”
His parents have nothing to say to that, staring blankly at him as if he’s someone they’ve never met. Victor opens his mouth to speak again, but a knock at the door cuts him off.
“I’ll get it.” Victor says, his adrenaline almost gone, leaving him exhausted.
He opens the door to see Felix, smiling and holding a gift card.
“Hey, dude! I know you’ve had a crazy night, so I thought we could take this Olive Garden gift card out on the town. My treat. Although, I guess it does technically belong to you.”
Victor stares at him, panicked, and shakes his head almost imperceptibly.
“Oh...” Felix says, taking in the scene around them. “Do you need help?” He whispers.
“Let’s go.” Victor says brightly, a snap decision.
“Oh, no you don’t. You’re coming right back here, and we’re going to have a talk-“ his father begins.
Victor laughs harshly, cutting him off. “I snuck off to New York without you knowing, I think I can go to the Olive Garden with Felix. Pilar, you okay?”
His parents’ mouths hang wide open, but Pilar just shrugs, assuming her bored look that normally hides something worse.
“Yeah. I’m just going to go to bed.” She says, bypassing her mother when she holds out a hand to her.
“Don’t. I don’t even want to look at either of you right now.” She says.
Felix suddenly grabs Victor, leaning in to whisper in his ear.
“Do you have a key?”
“Uhh, what?” Victor responds.
“Do you have a key to your apartment in your pocket?” Felix asks frantically, eyes darting to Victor’s parents, distracted behind him.
“Yes?” Victor says, before being roughly pulled out into the hall with the door shut quickly behind him.
“C’mon. Run.” Felix says, grabbing Victor’s arm and pulling him down the stairs of their building and into his car.
He shuts the door and locks it, panting hard. Victor stares at him.
“What was that?” He asks.
“I should be asking you that. Are you okay?” Felix says, finally able to focus on the problem at hand.
“Yeah. No. I don’t want to talk about it. Let’s get out of here before they report your vehicle as one belonging to a child kidnapper.”
Felix looks confused for a moment before shaking his head and starting the car.
“Do you actually want to go to Olive Garden?” He asks.
Victor almost emotionally checks out, not wanting to face what’s going on in his head.
“Yeah, I guess.” He mumbles, before an idea comes into focus. “Wait, can you drive to Brasstown?” He asks, sitting up straight.
“You got it, buddy. I should probably play my cheer-up playlist.” Felix responds, starting the music.
When they pull up, the lights are still on, just like Victor knew they’d be. Felix makes the connection right as he parks the car.
“Wait... Benji? Did something happen? Oh my god, did you kiss him again?”
Victor smiles despite himself. “Yeah. Well, he kissed me. We kissed each other? It happened twice again.”
Felix claps him on the back. “Good for you! But what about...”
Victor grimaces. “I don’t want to talk about that. Know it’s over, I’m not doing anything behind her back anymore. I have to talk to her after this.”
“Right. One battle at a time. Go get him, cowboy!” Felix whoops, a little too loud for his tiny car.
Victor steps out of the car and almost right into Sarah.
“Ah! What are you doing here? Actually, I don’t care. Something’s gotten into Benji, he won’t stop acting like a Disney Princess or something. Deal with him.” She says, running off as quickly as she appeared and driving away.
Victor tries not to figure out whether or not that was homophobic as he opens the door to the small coffee shop, seeing Benji there, washing the counters.
For a moment, he just observes, leaning against the doorframe. Benji looks so happy, humming to himself, small smile on his face. Victor can’t help but wonder if it’s because of him. He hopes it is.
Benji has the sleeves of his dress shirt rolled up, his jacket on the back of a chair. His hair is in his face, moving as he works on wiping down the machine.
“Hey.” Victor says, just loud enough to hear. Benji gives a small start, smiling larger as soon as he sees him.
“What are you doing here?” He asks, resting on his arms, propped up on the counter.
“Funny, Sarah just asked me that, right before she called you a Disney Princess.” Victor says, reveling in the sound of Benji’s laugh that follows.
“Is it weird that I missed you in the hour it’s been since I’ve seen you?” Benji asks, his expression a mixture of hopeful and a little scared.
“I missed you too.” Victor says, and then they’re walking into each other’s arms.
“What’s wrong?” Benji asks. “You’re doing the thing with your eyebrows.”
Victor looks at him, confused. “What thing?”
“The thing you’re doing right now.” Benji chuckles. “What’s going on?”
Victor hesitates, then spills everything. “Long story short, Mia saw us together, and then my parents told us they’re separating, and then I came out to a mixed response, so I’ve kinda been through it in the last hour.”
Benji pulls away from him, visibly concerned. “Fuck, Victor, are you okay? Sorry, that’s dumb. Is there anything I can do?”
To his own horror, a single tear spills down Victor’s cheek. Benji reaches up, wiping it away.
He steps up on his toes, putting his chin on Victor’s shoulder.
“You’re perfect. Everything about you is beautiful. Anyone who can’t see that is stupid, or at the very least, misguided.”
Victor laughs a little through his tears.
“And I like you. A hell of a lot. Like, a massive amount, and I really wanna take you on a date after your life stops falling apart.”
“I would love that.” Victor responds, voice cracking.
“Then it’s a date. All I’ve wanted for the last three months, anyway.” Benji says, leaning up to kiss Victor on the cheek.
He turns his head, meeting Benji’s lips with his own, and he sighs into Benji’s mouth. They press into each other, holding on tight.
“Wow. You’re good at that.” Benji breathes, laughing into Victor’s ear.
“I’m pretty sure that’s all you.” Victor responds, chuckling a little alongside him.
“Did you need anything? I’m happy to stay here for however long, but I do need to get away and lock the doors before I get distracted again.” Benji asks softly, tracing lines on Victor’s palm.
“No, I actually left Felix in the car, so he’s probably written a novel by now. I wish I could stay here with you.”
They look out the window together to see Felix, giving them an enthusiastic thumbs up from the car.
They laugh, foreheads pressing together.
“I will actually call you tomorrow. Schedule that date? You’ve got a lot to plan.” Victor teases.
“Whenever you can.” Benji says easily, turning his head up to capture Victor in another kiss, soft and simple.
“If you keep saying goodbye like that, I’m gonna have to change my schedule.” Victor jokes, squeezing Benji’s hand goodbye.
“Count on it.” He responds, squeezing back, and Victor walks backwards the entire way to the car, just to keep looking at him.
“Okay, damn, was that Queer Eye, because I queer CRIED!” Felix says, earning a look from Victor. “Too much? Okay. Where to next, Captain?”
Victor takes a deep breath. “I need you to take me to Mia’s house.”