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maybe today was simply not atsumu miya's point in time. ever since the day before, he felt this irrational vexation overwhelming his nightly thoughts. his fine line of conviction was simply distorted. and there he was, at his own parents' place, demanding his boyfriend to go on a date.
"come on — i bet yer bored outta yer mind! it's not like sitting here all day long is any fun!"
atsumu somewhat tried to rationalize his notion, and he was not wrong about it. they had taken, more like atsumu himself forced sakusa to take a weeklong break to visit hyougo, atsumu's home prefecture. it was not a shabby move, considering atsumu lied to his partner about his parents being there, when in reality they had gone away to visit their respective hometowns. in all honesty, sakusa was pissed.
"i'm not going."
"why?"
"why?" sakusa spat out. clearly, he was upset. "now you are asking me that? fine. i don't want to. satisfied?"
"yeah." crossing his arms, atsumu continued, "very satisfied. good luck being a woobly sea urchin while i trip myself over on the street and get kidnapped."
atsumu was not the best at sarcasm. in fact, he sucked at it. he took his wallet from the dining table and shut himself out of the house. this was not supposed to be like that. why did atsumu feel so upset over the fact that his boyfriend refused to go out with him? it was not the first time he got rejected. sakusa is an indoor person. if anything else, he hated going on dates. atsumu still used to compromised and always brought dvds to watch together at night, ignoring the visible fact that it was always him inviting himself over to sakusa's dorm.
furiously rubbing his skull, he quickly shot his head up. that was it. he had a purpose of coming here alone with sakusa, to woo him. even though they were dating, atsumu did not feel like it was working out. he was scared. he really, really liked sakusa.
just the thought of thinking that sakusa maybe accept his confession put shivers down to his spine. his entire body felt chill. sikes. this was bad. he wanted to cry.
this was not supposed to be like that. deep down he knew — at the end, it was always atsumu who screwed up somehow. he was hurt. he was hurt of the fact that maybe three months of them together was not working out.
it was almost night, 8:34 pm. even atsumu did not know how long he was out. one hour? two hours? he had no idea. it was not like he had his phone with — oh.
atsumu always keeps his phone in his back pocket. habitually, he proceeded to take out his phone. it was not there. then he remembered, ah shit. he forgot it at home.
screw it. he did not need it anyways.
his parents lived in an apartment complex, and there was a tiny park almost right beside the complex. truthfully, he felt angsty. seeing a grown man at a park at night was not a common site here. barely anybody was there. without much care, he welcomed himself to one of the empty long swings.
what am i going to do now, atsumu thought. he could not think of a single way to get inside that place without feeling humiliated. heck, he cares about his ego a lot. he was both prideful and bashful, so it came as no surprise as well.
"c'mon. i really screwed up this time, didn't i?" atsumu groaned in self-agony. he practically crippled himself by cringing.
"this is so stupid," and he was not wrong. this was pretty stupid. what are they, grade schoolers? it certainly felt like that to him. for some time, atsumu continued to indulge himself with his petty thoughts until a light voice erupted from his surroundings.
"you are right. it is stupid." it was sakusa. he was fully vested this time from head to toe, probably because it was rather dusty. he quickly positioned himself beside atsumu before the person right beside him then had the opportunity to speak out.
is this for real? atsumu almost felt like he was hallucinating. within seconds, the atmosphere around them got heavy by the tension surrounding them. atsumu felt like suffocating. no words were uttered by either one of them for a while until atsumu got the courage to speak out first.
"why did ya come here for?" atsumu asked.
"to apologise."
for the first time, atsumu felt like disbelieving his partner. sakusa rarely apologized, rarely. for him to even apologize — atsumu was in shock.
in short, he was dumbfounded.
"what?" sakusa's distorted face spit out. "why are you making that expression?"
"i, uhm-" atsumu threw his hands up. he was weirded out. not by sakusa, but by himself. he had no idea how to respond to that. he was nervous from the very beginning.
it was so obvious. sakusa let out a heavy breathe.
"listen. i'm sorry. i shouldn't have acted like that." he admitted. "i wanted to meet your parents. i wanted to see what kind of people raised a man-child like you."
"did ya just call me a man-child?"
"at least i didn't lie."
atsumu quickly looked at him in shock. atsumu was taken back by his mean comment, but it made sense now. sakusa felt hurt because he had lied to him.
"i guess i am at fault too. i shouldn't have acted so rashly." atsumu admitted. he knew he acted too rashly. it was not right. although his pride was at stake, he did not want to lose the person beside him at the moment at any cost. the person he cherishes so much.
sakusa let out a smile. it was so subtle. barely a smile one might say. but it was more than enough for atsumu. he knew exactly how sakusa was. atsumu knows him well. seeing him like him was better than most things he could ask for.
joining along, atsumu too let out a gleeful grin and rested his head on his partner's broad shoulder. he was brimming with bliss. although the moment was timed, it was rapturous, along with their fingers interlocking each other's.
"there's a convenience store nearby. why don't we drop by there before going home?"
"sure."
"did ya bring my phone?"
" yeah."
"mhm."
atsumu was overwhelmed and ecstatic. he was beyond those. maybe it was not the best day of his life, but it was the moment of his life.
really, he was happy.