Chapter Text
From the documents he has been looking at for hours, Jinguji Jakurai's eyes drift towards his windows - raindrops making small sounds as they hit on the window panes, he watches them as they drip on the glass and smudge the view of Shinjuku under the storm. The whole city give off a monochrome vibe that makes him think the scenery is kind of relaxing if the drops falling don't threaten to break the glass as the wind accompanying the rain rattles its frames violently.
Blinding lightning suddenly flashes, deafening thunder penetrating Jakurai's supposed-to-be soundproof room follows before the ringing of his doorbell.
Who would visit the Doctor at 2 AM? Is it Doppo or Hifumi perhaps? On rare occasions it could even be Samatoki or Ichiro. Any of those would be better than this man with drenched teal coat with a hood rimmed with red faux fur, pink and purple locks that miss its usual sheen and round framed glass sitting atop his small nose, foggy that it almost covers his blank azure eyes. "Amemura-kun?"
Lifting his face to look at the person who opened the door, Amemura Ramuda's dull, lifeless eyes slowly regain its sparkle. Rapidly blinking, he literally stands in his toes as he takes a closer look at Jakurai's face, his actions making the taller man move away on instinct. "You. It's really you." He grabs Jakurai's sleeve with the strength he never knew the Pinkette would have then pulls him downwards until he can sandwich Jakurai's face with his cold palms. He scans the Doctor's features with budding tears in his eyes as if he's genuinely happy to see him, his fondness receiving Jakurai's confusion. "I thought I forgot everything about you but I'm... I'm so glad I could still remember your face."
"H-how could you forget me when we just saw each other earlier?" That's quite unusual for Jakurai to stutter on his own words yet the way Ramuda is looking and touching him makes him feel... various things. He struggles to take the guy off him and fix his creased sleeve to distract himself from the tingling sensations inside his stomach. "You even threw me a handful of candies out of spite."
"We did? How could I be mean to you of all creatures?" Ramuda tilts his head slightly and takes just seconds for his expression to shift from a confused into an enlightened one, glossing his eyes with sadness. "You're not him, aren't you? There's no way for a creature like me to meet a dead man unless... I got lost again."
"Huh?" Jakurai's brows are drawn tight, annoyed that he's getting swept up again by Ramuda and his subtle expression changes which he used to refuse sharing with him before. "I have no time to talk about nonsensical matters with you so I'll just contact Arisugawa-kun and Yumeno-sensei to pick you up, okay?"
"Yumeno? Arisugawa? Are you perhaps talking about ex-King Dice and Thief Gentaro?" Now it's Jakurai's turn to blink at Ramuda's 'ex-King' and 'Thief' which technically no one would associate with those two. "Where are they? I have to tell them I screw up but I get to see you. Ah, they won't understand me for sure yet I still want to see their versions here."
Is this one of Ramuda's role playing games? If so then he has no plans to take more of this. Done with his crap, Jakurai attempts to close his door on Ramuda which the guy successfully stops by putting his foot before it slots in the frame. "Hey, that's not so nice of you to do that!"
"Believe me; you did far more things that do not belong to that category." Jakurai quips, eyes landing on those marks akin to gigantic, messy stitches peeking out of his white, almost see-through shirt hugging Ramuda's body tightly. He squints at them and notices that it runs from his chest to the left side of his neck - a kind of scar the Ramuda he's acquainted with doesn't have. All of Jakurai's senses rampage, telling him that the person right in front of him isn't the Ramuda he knew.
"Which Amemura-kun are you?" Jakurai asks, cautious and alerted since he now considers the stranger as an enemy. Well he always considered their Ramuda as one but this person is different. Is he even a person?
"Which...? There is only one Amemura Ramuda from the planet I came from; that is me." The smile he gives Jakurai doesn't even reach his eyes. It's nothing like the one filled with affection he flashed earlier but a mere imitation of human expression. It solidifies Jakurai's conclusion of this... whatever he is... being the least thing to human. "I assume there are lots of Amemura Ramudas here. That's interesting. I would be glad to hear more of it but for now, can you let me in? I've been out in the cold for so long I want some hot drink and warm place to stay until the rain stops."
Jakurai is hesitant to let him in. He's strong yes, but surely he won't stand a chance if the Doctor uses his mic. Then again it does not guarantee that this Ramuda doesn't have his. "Before I let you in, may I ask if you have a hypnosis mic?"
Ramuda blinks then tilts his head again. He soon takes his jacket off then flips it upside down and shakes it, going all through these just to show that he has nothing save for small drawstring bag which his glasses can fit inside, a few silver coins and some unidentifiable yet objects that pose no immediate danger. "I don't know what technology you're talking about but this is all I have when I arrived here," the stranger says leaning to slowly pick his things on the floor.
Without his coat, this skinny guy's trembling becomes apparent. Seems like he's telling the truth when he said he needs warmth and Jakurai now feels bad for almost letting a stranger out here to shiver with wet clothes, just because he has Ramuda's face.
"I'll take your word for it; I’ll let you stay." Jakurai declares as he helps gathering his things, handing him the trinket closest to him - a tiny bouquet of yellow primroses, about the size of his palm, preserved in glass. "But you have to change into dry clothes and explain who or... what you are."
"Got it." The other gives him a small smile as he receives the flower from the Doctor and carefully slips it back into his coat's pocket.
Jakurai the opens his door wider, letting him in. As he passes by, a faint scent of camellias stays on his trail. It has the same smell as Ramuda's favorite brand of shampoo. Jakurai presses his palm over his nose and mouth, waiting for it and the nostalgia that came with it to be gone before closing the door and following the stranger.
From his entryway, he finds his guest already sitting on one of his sofas, hugging his knees. Unlike his counterpart though, his shoes are politely left on the floor which the Doctor takes to put on the shoe rack. Seeing that he appears to be well-behaved, Jakurai leaves the pink stain on his black and white living room and goes to his bathroom to grab a towel then fill his tub with warm water before fetching him.
The stranger who's supposed to be behaving is now busy looking through the documents Jakurai was working with earlier and scribbling on them. Ramuda, one from here or from the other planet, sure loves to snoop into his things and easy to jump on whatever fascinates him. "Amemura-san..." The change in honorific doesn't sit well with Jakurai but he continues reprimanding him. "Drawing on someone's important documents is disrespectful!"
He snatches the papers from his hands then drapes the towel over the stranger's shoulders. He checks on them to see how much damage Amemura made on them only to find out that he actually corrected some points and added some interesting paragraphs. He throws a curious look at the stranger who seemingly likes the Doctor's interest on his work. "I'm bad with drawing unless someone's asking me to make some graphs." He speaks in a voice a note flat from the pitch their Ramuda always uses but Jakurai can somehow guess that he will throw a casual insult. "So, you're a Doctor too, huh? But you seem less intelligent than the one I knew. Or does this world's knowledge hasn't reached the level my planet has?" And he's right.
"I'm afraid that the latter one might be the case." Slapping agreement on Amemura's face instead of openly showing how his statement irked him, Jakurai observes for any signs of irritation from the stranger. Regretfully, he shows a deadpan expression, like his response didn't rouse him in any way – another reminder that this person isn't the gremlin known for jumping down on his throat with just a minor retort. He ignores the sting of his expectations being betrayed (he didn't even know why he felt it in the first place) and puts the papers aside. "Come with me; you need to bathe and get some dry clothes."
The stranger nods, wrapping himself with the towel and closely following the Doctor as he leads him towards his bathroom where Jakurai first checks if the water reached the perfect level then beckons Amemura to enter. He intently scans his surroundings, seemingly taking in as much visual information as he can. "This is where we bathe," Jakurai explains briefly which the other responds with an 'oh' then starts shedding his clothes, letting his coat fall on the floor. Jakurai sighs as he picks them up.
More stitches cover the entirety of the stranger, some of which on his toes and his thighs and arms while the rest are on his torso running towards his chest to neck. At a glance, one might think these lighter than his ivory skin, almost silver marks are just skin deep yet in the eyes of an expert in medical field like Jakurai, he can ascertain that those are meant to mend and attach together Amemura's body parts like he's a battered ragdoll with parts hastily fixed and put together to barely serve its purpose.
"Like what you're seeing Doctor?" The stranger teases. If not for the display of his difference from the man Jakurai once held dear, for sure the taller man would feel his blood rising to his cheeks with how the other person traces his scars with small pale fingers. Or maybe it already rose as he could feel the warmth in them. "Certainly the answer is no since they're ugly, aren't they?"
"Aside from the fact that I'm wondering if a professional did those properly, I am feeling a slight rise in temperature on my face at the sight of you touching them. I think it is compliment at the same time dangerous sign." A minute of blink exchange happens between the two before the oddness in Jakurai's honest words finally registers in his mind. Salvaging the smallest of the dignity he has, Jakurai attempts to make his thoughts conveyed properly, however interrupted by Amemura's laughter. Jakurai waits for him to stop yet whenever he does he looks at Jakurai then starts laughing again, adding more to Jakurai's shame.
"Are you saying that you're feeling hot looking at me?" Fanning himself using his hand, the stranger finally recovers for real this time. Despite the factors that makes him non-human, his demeanor and facial expressions becomes closer to humans the more he interacts with Jakurai. "Doctor, you're a pervert!"
"Says the one who stripped right in front of me." And the more Jakurai talks to him, the deeper he slips into adoring those days again when anger has no place between him and Ramuda. If only Amemura is their Ramuda then...
"If you're all set, now please get in the bath." The stranger giggles again at Jakurai's prompt but he finally gets in while Jakurai goes to the laundry area adjacent to the bathroom, carrying his clothes. With a button's press, the clothes Jakurai threw into the washing machine whirled with water and detergent. Trying to hear past the splashing of the machine, he readies himself in case he picks up an odd sound that may hint if something bad happens to the person on the other side of the frosted door.
If only Amemura is their Ramuda then what, Jakurai? He asks himself. They just share the face, voice and maybe adoration for Jakurai (at least for someone who looks like him) but he's not the one he loved, refuses to forgive and owes him apologies.
Thinking that the stranger can take care of himself, Jakurai goes to his kitchen. He'll look for any non-coffee based drink Hifumi left the last time his team visited his place. He finds a lone packet of instant chocolate drink sitting in the furthermost part on his cupboard and grabs it but first checks on the expiration date before opening it and dumping all of its contents into a plain ceramic mug, filling it with just enough water so it won't spill as he returns to his room.
The Doctor arrives just in time for Amemura to come out, wearing only Jakurai's dress shirt that thankfully covered more half of his thighs. "Is that chocolate?" He peeks on the cup and Jakurai swears he can see sparkles from the other person as he hands him the drink; the amount doubling when he takes a sip.
Jakurai notices the patches of wet on Amemura's shoulders, his hands instinctively gathers the still damp strands away from his eyes. The stranger jolts at the sudden gesture, but allows Jakurai do his thing. On his glassy eyes, the Doctor sees how nostalgic his reflection appears on them so he withdraws his hands from his hair and takes the empty cup from the stranger.
"We... we should dry your hair or you might catch a cold," he simply says signaling for the stranger to follow him as he enters his room. Jakurai settles on the side of the bed after getting his hair dryer and a towel while Ramuda sits right in between the Doctor's legs.
His hair is a bit dry, washing it returned a bit of its shine but it's still stiff. Their Ramuda's hair is naturally soft, like cotton candies even if he claims that he doesn't dye or take care of it too much. It would be great if his hair softens a bit too.
Lost in his thoughts, Jakurai accidentally touches the stranger's nape with the towel. He squeals, gathering the taller man's thoughts back to him who's covering the small LCD screen implanted on his skin. With wonder, the Doctor finally starts interrogating him: "if you're not the one I know then what are you? Who did this to you? How did you get here?"
"Easy with the questions Doctor, it's not like I'm not gonna run away!" Even with his back on him, Jakurai can imagine him grinning. "I'm an alien, in your language, a humanoid scientist from the planet covered with Ice, a lost child longing for my home planet Stella. My companions, Yumeno Gentaro a thief and Arisugawa Dice a former king, found me and let me join their adventure. Recently, I made a portal - an astral gate that could help us to travel faster but I screwed up with the coordinates and ended up here." A straightforward and short explanation; it's easy to understand, for Jakurai at least, but he left out most of the important details, the answer to his second question to be exact. "Can I ask some questions too?"
"No." Jakurai shoots it down in a millisecond, knowing what the stranger will ask.
"What is your relationship with this world's Ramuda? Certainly you're acquaintances. Are you friends, lovers even?" Amemura ignores his rejection and pushes with his inquiry despite how Jakurai treated him earlier. "Or perhaps... are you enemies? You adore him though, don't you? Why did you two become enemies then?" Like the storm blowing on his windows, Amemura shakes Jakurai's panes of indifference he surrounded himself with, attempting to shatter it even to expose him in his cold rain.
Even for someone like Jakurai, there are some topics he'd rather not talk about. By default, he'd dismiss it with an excuse of avoiding rumors but before he knew it, the stranger's voice is drowned by the sound of his panes breaking, all those unwanted memories surfacing along with the words that express the thoughts and emotions.
"I don't know! How could I even? He didn't even tell me a thing!" The stranger scampers away from him, his expression blank even if the naturally soft spoken Doctor roars at him. It is unjustified lashing, Jakurai is aware but he can't help it. He's actually filled to the brim, repressing things for too long that with just a drop the whole container will tip and spill. "Why are you keeping so many things to yourself? What prompted you to do those things?! Why won't you let me see what's inside your heart?!"
To Jakurai, Ramuda has become a subject of hate after what he did to him, to everyone. Being just in the same room with makes his blood boil and it explodes the moment the fashion Designer opens his mouth. His smiles and cutesy voice triggers him because he is aware that no part of his bubbly and child-like persona is real. It angers him that no one, especially Jakurai, knows who Amemura Ramuda really is.
Underneath the anger, Jakurai might be afraid, too. After all he loved Ramuda for his fun-loving nature and mystery. If only he could look through the layers of glucose it has been covered with and see what's inside his heart, then he wouldn't be shaking in fear before the fact that everything they shared before might be all for the sake of the Gremlin's plans.
"Just like you, he didn't also tell me a thing or am I informed of his mind - the context is different however the feeling is mutual, right?" In contrast to the Doctor's, Amemura's voice grows quieter. He may appear like the turbulent storm pouring over Shinjuku, mischievous yet his winds carry loneliness with it. "I really liked him and I really thought that it would be nice to have him with me for the rest of my life, though it's a wish that any shooting star cannot grant. When I learned we don't have much time, I studied hard, filled my mind with knowledge, threw away most of my morals and did this to my body all for his sake but he hated me instead of understanding me." Perhaps finding comfort in the man who looks like his departed lover, his guest starts talking about that person. "It would be awesome if someone could invent a machine that can peek inside anyone's heart, right? If I knew what was inside his heart, would fighting be the last thing we get to do together? If only he knew how much I love that creature and afraid of losing him, will I get to keep his smile in my heart aside from his face?" His voice returned to being robotic once more yet the emotions behind it are far from nonexistent - he found someone precious, had fun in each other's company, lost him. He went all through them so he knows what the Doctor is feeling at this moment very well and tried to understand him too that it puts Jakurai to shame for taking it out on him.
Jakurai hangs his head low, thinking on how to apologize for his unsightly behavior. His guest then covers Jakurai's hands with his, seemingly comforting him. The gesture encourages the Doctor lift his face and meet the other's gaze - his all knowing-eyes seeing through him and acknowledges his struggles. "This is a selfish request, but please do not go down the same path we threaded on, Doctor." His plea sounds vague to everyone but Jakurai. He's asking him not to make the same mistake, of keeping it all inside and choosing the wrong way to approach Ramuda.
He might be willing to talk it out with Ramuda but is he ready to forgive? He accepted his quirks and ideas no matter how absurd they sound, for Ramuda during those times he spent with Jakurai was outgoing and carefree. And the sole reason why Jakurai is unwilling to forgive is that he cannot accept Ramuda doing nasty things without having a solid reason for it, or at least telling him.
Jakurai has been seeking Ramuda out yet the man purposely distances himself more, keeping his heart sealed away. It hurts that the guy wouldn't tell him that he might be in a tight situation or left with no choice but to do things even it hurts him as well. Even if Jakurai is in pain too, would he be able to lift some of it just by listening to Ramuda.
Isn't he reliable enough for him to pour his heart out? Maybe Jakurai is always hesitating that Ramuda never considered talking to him. Or is there a greater entity that he's covering for or protecting Jakurai from?
Since there are no convenient things like a device that can read minds, they literally have to exchange words in order to know what's inside them, the Doctor laments.
"Alright," Jakurai smiles as he resolves to make a move – rip those candy layers off Ramuda's heart. Whether he'll succeed or not, still depends on Ramuda's willingness though. "But I'll give no promises that we could reconcile. Your counterpart is even more of a pain to deal with than you do."
"Did you just call me a pain in the ass, too?" His guest puffs his cheeks angrily one moment then laughing airily on the next. "Good luck then, Doctor. You would need to stock up a ton of patience!"
Seemingly relieved of the heavy burden he must be carrying for so long, he sighs as he falls heavy on Jakurai's chest. His guest rests his cheek on it, eyes heavy lidded. "Getting sleepy?" Jakurai asks while petting his head which he answers with a soft moan. His guest might be tired with all the talking they did. "Alright, I'll get you a fu-"
"Hey Doctor, can I sleep with you?" Jakurai splutters an incoherent response at his guest's proposal. This person must be fond of the way Jakurai loses his calm as he can hear the guy giggling softly and adds: "I can't sleep without Ousama and our thief and I don't want to be left alone."
"A-Alright but you would behave. Okay?" Gracious, both Amemura and theirs love to make misleading statements, Jakurai grunts mentally as he carries the smaller guy in his arms and tucks him comfortably on his side of the bed. Jakurai then lies down beside him, covering an arm over the other's shoulder to keep them secure and warm. He scoots closer to Jakurai's body and this time, the Doctor feels the gush of life coming from the other guy that pulls him into his most peaceful sleep since the day Ramuda left his bed.
//
Morning breaks and sound of pouring rain is gone, instead of the sunshine, Jakurai wakes up to someone's shrill scream. "Could you please tone it down?" He croaks, waiting for his eyes to adjust and see who's making the aberrant alarm.
"What tone it down? Why am I here, Jakurai?" Instead of his guest, Ramuda is there on his floor glaring at him. As to why he's here, Jakurai also wonders. Jakurai can consider him a morning person yet it's still too early to deal with this. "AND WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES?"
Clothes? Jakurai who's absentmindedly glances at Ramuda does a double take. Sunlight pours from the open windows and limns him in white, rendering Jakurai's dress shirt almost translucent and casting shadows to emphasize how diminutive his body is. It looks nice... no never mind that. Isn't it supposed to be on his guest but why is their Ramuda wearing, only wearing the shirt, now?
Speaking of which...
Jakurai hops off his bed making Ramuda yell louder, and goes towards his laundry are to check if Amemura's clothes are there. The place looks exactly like how he left it yet those are nowhere to be found. The only remaining possession of that guy is the primroses inside the glass sitting peacefully on top of the washing machine. He takes it and returns to Ramuda, who's started looking inside his closet, throwing Jakurai's own as he searches for his garments.
His hair looks fluffy and shiny, has no stitches on his body and wears that irritating attitude – he is really their Ramuda. If he didn't find the flower, he would think that last night's events are products of his lack of rest. Oddly though, the fashion Designer's eyes are drawn to the item in the Doctor's hand as if the item is familiar to him.
Perhaps he's not the only one who met a stranger?
Jakurai then recalls his guest's plea, his heart beating loud at the unexpected chance to fulfill it. Is he nervous, afraid? Maybe he is but angry, seething? Mysteriously, no. For the first time in a while, uncertainty fills Jakurai's mind; Ramuda always makes him feel this way and it's kind of hard to admit that Jakurai missed how refreshing and not irksome it feels like.
"Ramuda-kun, can you let me peek inside your heart?" His question comes out vague and a bit shaky, reflecting how his thoughts are as of now but he's done being such a coward and holding on to his anger for so long.
Will he slip away and dodge Jakurai again though? His silence gives him no confirmation and it's not helping that the Pinkette suddenly whispers these words in a playful tone: "Eeh, does the old man plan to actually slice me up? Scary..."
"I heard you, Amemura-kun." Now, Jakurai knows that he's still not ready, not that he expects him to be. "It is actually alright to jus-" Cutting his words of, the other grabs his sleeve, forcing him to crouch with his face trapped in between Ramuda's palms.
"Do you really want see? Even if it'll make you hate me more?" Ramuda shifting into his natural voice drizzles this kind of chill all over Jakurai that no one, except their Ramuda can. His marble eyes pierce through him as well, looking for any signs of the Doctor faltering. Jakurai doesn't back down and gazes back as he gives him a small nod.
"Tell him while you still have time... hmmn." Whatever Ramuda found, it makes him release Jakurai, walking silently towards his door. With his back on the taller guy, he says: "Prepare your scalpel, look as much as you like, Sensei~"