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Ellie gently drummed her pencil against the side of her notebook to the rhythm playing in her ear. A warm breeze playing with her hair as she finished the portrait of Dina, who was laying in her lap with the other earbud in. Ellie smiled down at her and gently tucked a piece of hair behind her ear before taking a deep breath of fresh air and looking around. Dina had convinced her to just sit outside for a few hours to try and clear her mind, and it was working surprisingly well. Between the warm, sunny day, and the sweet smell of flowers surrounding them, she felt more relaxed then she had in weeks.
Ellie felt a frown tug at her lips when she remembered the reason she had been so tense lately. They were coming up on a little over two months since the incident, and Joel still hadn't regained consciousness. Doc said that his body was almost completely healed so all they could do now was play the waiting game, but she didn't know how long it was going to be before he woke up. For all they knew it could be months, or even years before he woke up. If he woke up at all.
Before Ellie could spiral to far down that line of thought she felt a gentle smack on her leg, and realized she had been bouncing it, which woke Dina. Ellie gave her a weak smile and quietly said," Sorry, babe."
Dina cracked an eye open and stared up at her with a grumpy look, but that quickly morphed into one of concern as she sat up and gently cupped Ellie's cheek saying," What's wrong? We can go visit Joel, if that's what you're worried about."
Ellie shook her head and told her," No, no, it's okay. We can stay out here for a bit longer, not sure when we're gonna get another day like this."
Dina looked into her eyes for a moment before smiling and saying," Okay." She turned to look out over the field down the hill from them before tilting her face up to the sun. " We should bring Joel here, when he wakes up."
Ellie felt warmth flood her chest as she stared at her. Dina always said that, when Joel wakes up. Not if, when. It might sound a little silly, but it gave her hope, and it never failed to bring a smile onto her face. She looked over the field with a smile. Dina had found this spot a couple weeks ago during one of her patrols. It was a large hill on a treeline with a smaller meadow just down from them. It was close enough to the town so they wouldn't have to worry about getting attacked, but far, and well hidden enough, to not be disturbed. " Yeah, I'm sure he'll love it here."
Dina settled her head on her leg again and asked," You done with the portrait?" Ellie nodded and flipped the note book to show her. Dina looked it over for a moment before saying," I don't know El, I don't think you added enough freckles."
Ellie laughed and said," Oh, whatever. Next time you can draw me, and I'll critique you."
Dina grinned and told her,"Sure. Here let me try right now." She grabbed the notebook and pencil, and started drawing. Ellie stared down at her with a fond smile as her tongue poked out of the side of her mouth in concentration. After just a few short minutes of drawing she said," Okay, done." And turned the notebook to Ellie, who started laughing.
A stick figure with a very poorly drawn guitar was sitting on the page. It took her a few seconds to stop laughing long enough to say," Wow babe, how did you whip out this masterpiece so fast?" Dina just smiled brightly and said," I learned from the best."
Ellie's laugh pattered out and she just stared at Dina feeling love flood her chest. She had done so much for her these past two months. Always pairing with her on patrols so Ellie wouldn't have to deal with people asking her about Joel, taking her to little spots like this to talk about anything and everything, sitting with her during mealtimes and going with her to sit with Joel, and just being there for her. Ellie really loved her.
Ellie reached out to grab the notebook and placed it on the ground, then intertwined their fingers together and quietly said," Dina, I.....thank you. For everything. I don't know what I would have done without you here supporting me."
Dina's eyes softened with a affection and she told her," Of course." Ellie gently rested her forehead on Dina's and just sat there for a moment. Only to grin widely and pull back as Dina's stomach rumbled. " Hungry again? Well, I suppose it is almost time for supper." Dina poked her tongue at her and said," You don't get to make fun of my appetite, I'm eating for two now."
Ellie just grinned, shoved her notebook and pencil into her bag before she pushed herself onto her feet then turned to help Dina up. She made a face and rubbed her stomach saying," Okay, I get it. We're going to eat soon, just calm down."
Ellie placed her hand over Dina's and said," Are you giving your mama trouble little one?"
Dina huffed out,"They always give me trouble."
Ellie huffed out a laugh and told her," Well we better get back before they really starts kicking up a fuss."
Dina said,"Wonderful idea," and grabbed her hand as the two walked back to town together.
Passing through the thick foliage Ellie found her thoughts wandering. These past two months had been, difficult. Even with Dina she had still been struggling to return to some semblance of normal. She had stared patrolling again just last month, so her day usually consisted of, wake up, go on morning patrol, head back for lunch, spend the afternoon either with Dina, Jesse, or both, and then get dinner. Her evening's were spent with Joel, just sitting in his room and talking to him. Doc said it might help him wake up sooner, so she was more then willing to try it.
Before she even realized it they were back in Jackson. They headed into the diner together and, after grabbing some food, went to go sit with Jesse. He smiled at them both and said," Hey. How are you doing today?" Ellie half-shrugged telling him," Same as usual." He nodded and immediately started telling them both a story about how he and Bryan had found a semi functional car in one of the garages, and their plan to fix it up. It was a pleasant distraction and Ellie found herself engrossed in the story until someone walked up to their table. She bit back a groan and tried telling herself that maybe she wouldn't ask this time, which was quickly thrown out the window as Amy said," Hi Ellie. How are you holding up? How's Joel doing?"
She managed to grit out," I'm fine, and he's hasn't changed." Amy immediately gave her a sympathetic look and told her," Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, hun. I'm sure he'll wake up soon."
Ellie just nodded stiffly and stared down at her plate, suddenly not hungry anymore. Amy shifted from foot to foot and looked like she wanted to say something, but after a moment she just nodded at them all and walked back to her table. Ellie heaved out a sigh. She understood that Amy didn't mean any harm, but she asked almost everyday and it was just twisting the knife in the wound for her. Just a constant reminder that he still wasn't awake.
Jesse's eyes flickered between a retreating Amy, Ellie, and Dina before clearing his throat and continuing his story. After a few minutes he seemed to realize that Ellie was only half paying attention cause he switched the topic to something else. " We're having a bonfire, me and a couple others, after seven. You two wanna come?" Dina looked to Ellie and raised an eyebrow. Ellie pushed her lips together. She didn't particularly want to, but she could see a gleam in Dina's eye that told her she wanted to go. Besides, she knew she had been avoiding a lot of people recently, maybe this would be a good way to tell everyone how grateful she was for all they had done. She nodded slowly and stood up saying," Sure. Sounds like fun. Um, I'm gonna go sit with Joel for a bit first though. See you later."
Jesse nodded understandingly, telling her," Later."
Dina stood up and they both walked over to the bin. Ellie stared at her plate guiltily. She hated tossing food, but she wasnt hungry. Dina seemed to read her mind as she put her plate in the bin and grabbed Ellie's telling her," Baby's still hungry so I'll eat this when we get to Joel's room." Ellie smiled at her grateful and the two went on their way.
They were both quiet the whole way there, just holding hands, and enjoying the cool night air. Walking into the clinic they both waved to the nurse at the front desk, who returned the greeting before going back to filling out forms, and made their way to Joel's room. Ellie opened the door and motioned for Dina to go first then followed behind her and closed the door. The room was quiet except for the soft beep of the heart monitor, no Tommy keeping watch. Although that wasn't very surprising. A lot of people knew her nightly ritual by now and tried to give her privacy, which she was extremely grateful for.
She moved towards the couch only to stop as she heard Dina groan. Dina turned to her with an apologetic look and told her," Sorry El, I have to go heat this up real quick. I'll be right back." As she headed out the door she added," Don't forget to tell him about my amazing drawing." Ellie shook her head with a smile as she closed the door, but quickly grew more somber as she looked over Joel.
He was completely healed, save his leg, but even that was practically all healed up by now too. She had been right, they weren't able to save it. Which meant that they had to amputate just above the knee, but doc said that it went as good as it could have.
Ellie sat heavily in the chair next to his bed and quietly said," Hey Joel." She placed her arms on the rail guard and rested her chin on her arms before saying," Let's see. This morning was pretty boring, Dina and I didn't even run into anything. Lunch was okay, they were serving that meatloaf again, but nothing special." A smile slide across her face as she continued," Dina found this wonderful spot a little outside of town. Its beautiful there, I can't wait to show you. It on a hill just past the treeline with a small field at the bottom, and Dina swore she saw some wild horses there." Her smile faltered a little," Amy asked about you again. I don't know what you did to woo that woman, but you better wake up soon so you can deal with her yourself."
She pressed her lips together and thought for a moment before saying, "Oh yeah. Jesse invited us to a bonfire later. I'm still not entirely sure I wanna go, but I figured Dina would want to, so we'll probably head out in about an hour or so." Joel remained as unresponsive as ever, the beeping of the heart monitor was the only thing that answered. Ellie sighed. She swiveled in her chair to pick up the guitar she left in here, and started strumming a melody. She let her mind wander again as she waited for Dina to get back.
Her nightmares had started to die down a little, but the one with the braid in her hair, Abby, Tommy had said that she told them her name was Abby, was still was in all of them. Sometimes Ellie was back in that room, pinned down and helpless as she delivered the final blow. Other times she invaded Jackson, all of Ellies friends and family lined up as she killed them one by one. Ellie let out a slow breath and stared at the wall.
She would be lying if she said she hadn't thought about going after them. Tommy said he recognized the patch on a couple of their jackets. WLF, Washington Liberation Front. They were posted up in Seattle, it wouldn't be to hard to make it to them. But the more she took time to really sit and think about it, the more she realized it wouldn't work. WLF wasn't a tiny group by any means. She would have to make her way through a small army to get even a chance at one of them, assuming they were even there at all. Plus she wasn't about to drag someone else along on her with her, but she knew that if she left someone would come after her. Whether Tommy, Jesse, or Dina, it didn't matter. She wasn't about to risk anyone she cared about. Her eyes drifted over to Joel. Besides she wanted, needed, to be here when Joel woke up, no matter how long that took.
Dina popped back into the room a few minutes later with a steaming plate and a smile. She headed to the couch and the two of them sat in a peaceful silence, with Dina eating and Ellie playing the guitar. Once she was finished Dina laid back on the couch and said," Play me a song?"
"Which one?" Ellie asked with a grin.
Dina shrugged," One you haven't played for me before." Ellie turned the chair to face Dina, then pushed her lips together and thought for a moment. She started strumming a few different cords and found herself playing a familiar melody. She stopped before settling into the chair a bit more and started playing again with purpose.
"If I ever were to lose you, I'd surely lose myself."
"Everything that I have found here, I've not found by myself."
"Try sometimes and you'll succeed, to make this man of me."
"All my stolen missing parts, I've no need for anymore."
"'Cause I believe."
"And I believe cause I can see, our future days. "
"Days of you and me."
Ellie let out a slow breath as she finished the song and tossed a weak smile to Dina who gave her a reassuring one in return. Dina opened her mouth to say something, but a soft, raspy voice spoke to the right of Ellie first. "Well, that didn't suck."
She whipped her head to the side and saw Joel's warm, familiar eyes staring back at her. The guitar slipped from her finger and she was standing by his bed before she even realized that she had moved. "Joel?" She breathed out shakily, hardly believe her eyes.
Ellie was vaguely aware of Dina muttering," Holy shit." And coming to stand by her side. Dina said,"Hey. Welcome back." Joel blinked at her groggily, his brows furrowed in confusion. She gently rested a hand on Ellie's arm and told her," I'm gonna go get Dr. Watral. I'll be back soon."
Ellie nodded absentmindedly, still not fully believing what was happening. Dina gave her a peck on the check, which she learned into, then ran out of the room. Ellie stared at him for a moment before quietly saying," Hey."
Joel smiled and murmured," Hey," back.
She shifted from her weight before asking the first thing that came to mind," How do you feel?"
He shifted his gaze to the ceiling at was quiet for a minute before telling her," A little sore, but not half as bad as I expected to feel. M' throat's dry as hell though."
Ellie turned and crouched next to her pack, digging around for her canteen. As she pulled it out she realized her hands were shaking so she took a second to take a few deep breaths and calm down. Standing back up she eased his bed so he was in a sitting position and gave him the canteen while keeping a close eye on him. She bit down the urge to tell him to take it easy.
He took a few sips, but lowered the canteen with a frown and ran a hand over his face, then looked back up at Ellie in confusion. She quietly answered his unasked question. " Doc says you're almost completely healed. It's been a while, a few months actually since-."
She lowered her gaze to her white knuckled grip on the rail and let out a shakey breath before she managed to choke out," They weren't sure when--I wasn't sure if you were gonna wake up." She saw Joel's hand lift up slowly and he seemed to hesitate before lowering it over hers, squeezing it slightly.
He gently said," M'sorry for scarin' you kiddo."
It was like a dam burst inside her. She had been terrified she would never get to hear him say that again, would never hear him say anything again. It was like all these weeks, and months of telling herself he was gonna be okay were finally real. She brought her other hand up to cover her mouth as she started sobbing feeling a mix of emotions, but mostly just an overwhelming sense of relief. Ellie started leaning towards him and he met her halfway, pulling into a hug. The railing digging into her stomach was uncomfortable, but she barely paid it any mind as she buried her face into his shoulder and finally felt like she could breath again.