Work Text:
Izuku blinked up from the papers he was reading when a pair of hands slammed on the desk in front of him. Mei Hatsume’s face loomed in his vision.
“Hello, Hatsume. What can I do for you?” Izuku already felt a budding headache.
“S.O.! You still haven’t commissioned your Overlord Suit! You know I’ve got what you need to make sure you’re protected from assassinations, usurpers, and paper cuts in style.” Her hands went to his vest and began patting it. She frowned. “This is boring, but if you want boring you can at least do it right.”
Over her shoulder Izuku could see Gigantomachia getting to his feet with a scowl. Izuku shook his head, and his overprotective self-appointed bodyguard slowly sat back down. He should consider more protective clothing. Shirakumo had returned Izuku’s hero gear in perfect condition after the interviews were over, but Izuku ended up adopting formalwear for everyday work - vest, dress pants, and button-up shirt, no tie or jacket. Shirakumo continued to supply a steady source of the outfits, and Izuku found them more… suitable attire for his current line of work. He made a mental note to ask where they came from. The downside, however, was the loss of both functionality and protection. Izuku was surprised that he hadn’t encountered an assassination attempt yet. Hatsume had a point.
Which is why he didn’t bodily remove Hatsume from his office when her hands moved on to his pants. “Good, you’re wearing my babies. The Exo-Kneecaps?”
Her naming sense had worsened with age, but the lightweight knee supports really did help Izuku’s joints stand up to the pressure of One for All-powered kicks. “Yeah, they’re great, but you know that.”
“My babies are the best.” She bobbed her head sharply. “So what do you want for your suit? I’ve got the general style, but I’m thinking dark green, and do you want an envelope opener in the gloves? Oooh maybe razors. And you don’t have a watch yet, it’s a great addition to any formal attire and perfect for concealing all sorts of fun things -”
She shoved a watch into Izuku’s hands, and he held it away from himself uncertainly. He knew better than to accept anything Hatsume handed him without question. “What does it do?” he asked cautiously.
Hatsume's reply was interrupted when the window shattered inward.
Izuku was instantly on his feet with One for All activated when four people flew in through what should have been reinforced glass. Gigantomachia moved to intercept the unexpected invaders. The world slowed. Izuku performed a rapid analysis of the situation.
Priority one: defend bystanders. He pulled Hatsume behind him gently, ignoring her shriek that sounded more excited than worried.
Priority two: deal with immediate threats. Gigantomachia successfully engaged three of the intruders, but was distracted by the last one who escaped his grasp. The villain took three steps in Izuku’s direction, his fingernails - talons? - sharp and clawed, hand reaching. Izuku focused on that one. He could vault the desk, taking a precious second to do so, or -
Izuku looked at the watch in his hand, and did what any quick-thinking person handed one of Hatsume’s babies would do: he hurled it at the oncoming villain. As expected from one of Hatsume’s works, there was a flash of light and a loud bang on impact.
He didn’t expect the fire that exploded outwards.
“No,” he whispered through the villain’s panicked screams. This wasn’t good, not good at all.
The paperwork. He’d just finished with that entire stack.
“HATSUME!” he yelled. He sent a glare over his shoulder at the culprit, then vaulted the desk at a speed that blurred his vision. He smacked the smouldering documents as he passed in an attempt to extinguish them, holding back just enough to avoid clearing the desk with the blowback of the movement.
He rushed toward the flaming, screeching villain. He ignored the stinging heat against his hands as he picked the man up and hurled him back through the window. The villain flew in an arc toward a large fountain halfway across the courtyard below. Izuku didn’t listen for the splash as he absently patted his clothes, extinguishing the embers before they could do more than singe the flimsy fabric.
Gigantomachia had already subdued the other intruders - two knocked out and held under his arm, the other trembling with a large hand wrapped around his throat. A glance around the room revealed no further immediate threats. Izuku took a deep breath and let One for All drain out of him. The adrenaline rush left him lightheaded in the sudden stillness.
“See?” Hatsume beamed, breaking the silence. Her goggles were over her eyes, but he could easily picture the sparkling intensity behind them. “My babies are useful!”
Izuku massaged his temple with one hand. “Gigantomachia, if you would please deal with that and call security.” He made a sweeping gesture toward the villains and the window. Distant yelling filtered in, along with a draft that rustled the paperwork softly. He’d call the janitorial crew, they’d pick everything up and get someone in to replace the broken glass.
He turned toward Hatsume fully, taking a deep breath. “And you. If any of your ‘babies’ set my paperwork on fire again, I will fire you.”
Her smile barely dimmed. “No fire, got it. But you definitely need fireproof fabric. Maybe a protective shutter for the desk for emergencies -”
After Gigantomachia finished cleaning up the intruders, Izuku would consider having him remove her from the office. For now, he tuned her out as he sadly shuffled the burnt documents, seeing what he could salvage.
He got a call from Hisashi an hour later. It was the first time Hisashi had called Izuku rather than the other way around.
“Izuku! Are you alright? You weren’t hurt, were you?”
“Yes? How did you even know?”
“Your… janitorial crew told your explosive young friend, who screamed the news to the entire neighborhood.”
Izuku sighed. Hisashi was almost certainly exaggerating about the entire neighborhood hearing - Bakugou had slightly more self-control than that when it came to spreading intelligence on villain activity - but maybe he should think about security leaks, just in case.
“Well, I’m fine. I should get back to work.”
“Izuku -”
Izuku waited.
“I’m sorry. I thought I had…” Hisashi hesitated again. “Never mind.” He hung up.
Izuku wondered what that was about.