Chapter Text
Yennefer comes to gradually, in a room that's much darker than it should be when she opens her eyes. She reaches out, across the bed, only to find it empty, though the sheets are still warm. As consciousness asserts itself further, she can hear someone moving around the room. She props herself up on an elbow, rubbing at her eye.
"Tissaia? Wha's wrong?"
"Nothing," Tissaia's voice is soft. "It's early yet, Yennefer, go back to sleep."
Yen squints at the window, but the darkness gives no clue as to the time, only that it is well before dawn. "It's too early for you to be up." She yawns. "Come back to bed." Wiggling her toes against cooling sheets, she pulls the covers up further. "My feet are getting cold."
A soft laugh comes from the darkness, giving Yen an insight as to Tissaia's position. "Is that all I am to you?" Tissaia's footsteps come closer to the bed and a kiss is pressed to Yennefer's forehead. "As tempting as the invitation to warm your feet is, I'm afraid cannot. I must go."
Yennefer grabs Tissaia's wrist before she can retreat, tugging until she sits down heavily on the bed. She quickly wraps her arms around Tissaia's midsection, resting her head in her lap and curling around her.
"No. I absolutely forbid you to leave me here all alone."
"Yennefer," Tissaia starts, and there's more tension than affection in her voice, Yen notes, though a hand comes to rake through her hair. "I have work that must be attended to."
"You worked till late last night," Yennefer protests, burying her face further into Tissaia's stomach. "Surely you deserve to lie abed a little longer this morning?"
"Unfortunately, as you well know, that is not the nature of my work," Tissaia says, already working to unpick Yennefer's fingers from where they grip her dress. Yennefer merely tightens her hold and Tissaia sighs. "Let me up."
"No. I want you to stay." Yennefer is aware that Tissaia is not in a playful mood this morning, and yet still she persists.
"Yennefer," Tissaia warns, her efforts to be released increasing. "Let me up, now."
She knows that tone well. She heard it often enough when she was a student here to recognise the imminent danger it signals. It's only through supreme effort that she keeps herself from pushing just that little bit harder against it. Instead, she rolls onto her back, letting Tissaia go, and flings out a hand to ignite the candles by the bed. Tissaia wastes no time in getting up with a huff and continuing to get ready. Yennefer watches her sit at the foot of the bed to put her boots on.
"Will you be finished at a reasonable time today?" she asks. "Or must I dine alone again?"
"You dined with Triss and Sabrina yesterday," Tissaia points out and Yennefer curses herself for being so free with the details of her day the previous evening.
"But without you," Yennefer says. "Which is akin to being alone, these days."
Tissaia glances back over her shoulder at the confession, as if looking for artifice in Yennefer's words. When she seems satisfied that there is none, she sighs again. "I don't know when I'll be finished. I- I will try to find the time to meet you for d-"
"Oh, you'll try and find the time, will you?" Yen tuts. "That makes me feel very special indeed, Tissaia, thank you for sacrificing an hour with your old books for me." She holds up a hand when Tissaia goes to object. "No, actually, for potentially sacrificing an hour. If you find the time."
Standing up, Tissaia turns to face her now, hands clasped at her abdomen and mouth set in a stern line. "I thought you might understand that there are certain responsibilities I have here that I cannot simply abandon whenever you feel the need for my company." She purses her lips. "Clearly that was expecting too much of you."
"Oh no," Yen says, throwing back the covers and hobbling on her knees to the foot of the bed where Tissaia stands. "You don't get to do that anymore. You don't get to use your disappointed voice on me." She thrusts a finger at her own chest. "I'm your fucking wife, Tissaia. Not some idiot child who can't lift a stone."
"And yet you act like one," Tissaia says, shaking her head.
"By wanting to spend time with you?" Yennefer spits.
"By thinking I can drop everything on a whim," Tissaia says. She moves now, back to her dressing table, and lifts her medallion, placing it over her head and arranging it on her chest. She catches Yennefer's eye in the mirror. "We can't all just decide to swan around the Continent doing whatever we want, Yennefer. Some of us have obligations."
The jibe hurts more than she expects, but she's well versed in not letting her pain show. She curls her lip as her eyes settle on Tissaia's medallion. "We can all decide that, actually. That's the whole point of having freewill. The ability to choose what we want to do. And you clearly don't want to spend time with me."
She flops back down into bed, turning her back to Tissaia. Her heart is thudding against her breastbone, her breath coming quickly. She can barely hear over them, so she can't tell if Tissaia's footsteps are approaching the bed. The slight creaking of the door opening answers that question.
The door doesn't close immediately; Tissaia's lingering. Hope flutters in Yennefer's chest that she might come back in, might apologise and decide to stay after all. When she hears Tissaia inhale, she holds her own breath.
"I had hoped, by now, that you might have realised the entire world doesn't revolve around you."
Not coming back to bed, then. Yen allows herself a bitter laugh. "How could it? When it's so busy revolving around fucking Aretuza?"
"Goodbye, Yennefer." Tissaia's voice is softer now. "I'll see you this evening."
Swallowing against the lump in her throat, Yennefer nods. "Yeah, only if you can find the time."
The door closes. Yennefer lies in silence for a few seconds. She sits up, holds out a hand towards the empty hearth, and lets loose a torrent of fire that no doubt erupts from the chimney.
Once spent, she collapses back into bed and yanks the covers over her head.
She spends far longer in bed than is necessary, to prove a point. To whom, she's not really sure. But she finally gets herself up and dressed and wanders the corridors until she locates Triss and Sabrina who appear to be rearranging Triss' collection of herbs and potions. Yennefer slopes into the room and drops into a chair with a sigh. She sees Triss and Sabrina exchange a look.
"So, who pissed in your porridge this morning?" Sabrina asks, wincing when Triss nudges her in the side.
"What she means is, you look upset," Triss translates. "Has something happened?"
Yennefer sighs again, propping her head up in her hands as she regards her friends.
"Tissaia and I had an argument," she admits.
"Is that...unusual?" Sabrina lifts her eyebrows. "I'd assumed arguing was foreplay for the pair of you."
"Sabrina!" Triss scolds. "You can't just-"
"Sometimes it is," Yennefer says, cutting Triss' admirable attempt at sparing her blushes. "But not this time."
"What did you argue about?" Triss asks, moving over to sit by Yennefer, laying a hand on her arm.
Letting out a groan, Yen shrugs. "About the fact that I never see her. And about how her precious Aretuza is more important to her than I am."
"You know she has to work, Yen," Triss says, gently. "And her position is really stressful."
"I know, Triss," Yen says.
"She's the one who keeps this whole place going," Sabrina puts in. "Do you think the rest of the fucking Brotherhood lies awake at night, wondering how we're going to negotiate a reduction in price with the farmers for next year's harvest? Or how we can find balance in teaching the non-magical intake with the girls who actually have abilities? Or how-"
"I know what she does, Sabrina," Yennefer says, frowning. "But if Stregobor and the others don't give a fuck, why should she?"
"You know why, Yen," Triss says, squeezing her arm. "You, more than most, know how much she cares. And not about the building or the grounds. But about the girls and what this place means for them."
Sighing heavily, Yen lets her head drop to the table. "You're supposed to be my friends. When I come to you to complain about my wife, you're supposed to take my side." But even as the words leave her mouth, she knows they're right.
"Not when you're being an idiot," Sabrina tells her.
"You're not being an idiot," Triss tells her, stroking her back. She can imagine the glare Sabrina is receiving right now. "It's very reasonable to want to spend time with your spouse. Maybe you just-" There's a pause and Yennefer lifts her head to watch Triss struggle to find the right words. "Maybe it's more about how you approach the subject, than the subject itself."
"I haven't even told you what was said," Yennefer points out. "How do you know how I approached it?"
Triss tilts her head and smiles, while Sabrina opts for outright laughter.
"Yen, I love you, but I also know you," Triss tells her.
Narrowing her eyes, Yennefer relents. "Fine. I'll apologise. We can take it from there."
"That's a good start," Triss agrees. "But perhaps leave it a while yet. Interrupting her when she's made it clear she's busy isn't perhaps the best plan."
"I'll take her dinner," Yen decides. "That was-" She wrinkles her nose. "-a bone of contention. So it may go some way to helping with the apology."
"That makes sense," Triss says. "And I'm sure she'll be grateful that you're willing to make the first move to resolve things." She sighs and shakes her head. "You're as stubborn as each other."
"Well, now that we've saved Yennefer's marriage," Sabrina says, with a roll of her eyes. "What time were you thinking we should head out tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow?" Yen looks between them. "What's happening tomorrow?"
"We're visiting a Fayre," Triss tells her. "I used to go with my family, and I still like to attend when I can. I go most years."
"That's sweet," Yen says, and means it. Triss is the sort of person to derive joy from the most mundane activities. She lifts an eyebrow at Sabrina. "And you're going as well?"
"Yes." Sabrina's eyes flash with warning. "What of it?"
"Nothing," Yennefer says. "I just didn't think it sounded like something you'd normally do, that's all."
Well, unless you're trying to get into someone's knickers, that is.
There's a crash when Sabrina drops the bottle she's holding.
"Oh dear," Triss says, as a blue vapour starts to drift upwards from the shards, far too calm for what she follows it up with. "Don't breathe that in."
Sabrina glares at Yen while the three of them scarper out of the room, holding their breath.
I am not trying to get into her knickers.
Yen grins as best she can while trying not to inhale a noxious substance. Well, you're definitely not succeeding at it.
Sabrina gasps as Triss closes the door and locks it behind them, her back turned to the other two.
Shut your fucking mouth, Vengerberg.
It's not open!
Triss turns around and they both turn smiles in her direction, making her frown.
"What's going on?"
"Nothing!" Sabrina says, immediately, shooting Yen a warning glare.
"Nothing at all," Yen confirms. "But listen, on the off-chance I can persuade Tissaia to take an actual break tomorrow, fill me in on this Fayre the two of you are going to."
Triss' face lights up at the prospect of more company, while Sabrina's expression could sour milk at twenty paces. Yennefer ignores her and listens to Triss babble on about the stalls and the food and the dancing.
She cajoles the kitchen staff into fixing her a dinner for two that she can take to Tissaia. It seems as good a way as any to apologise and to get to have dinner with her, so two birds with one stone. Stepping through a portal, she arrives just outside Tissaia's office. After the way they parted, she almost feels like she should knock. But she never usually does, and she has no hands as she's carrying a heavy tray, so she nods and the doorknob twists to grant her entry. The room is lit by candles, and illuminated by the moon coming through the window. Its light bathes Tissaia's desk and, when Yennefer looks closer, she sees Tissaia herself slumped forward, head resting on the desk, a quill still in one hand; fast asleep.
Setting the tray down and muttering a charm to keep the food from getting cold, Yennefer makes her way over to Tissaia's slumbering form. She bends and sits on her haunches, not wanting to startle Tissaia awake. She lays a gentle hand on her knee and squeezes.
"Tissaia?" She keeps her voice soft and low.
With an undignified snort, Tissaia sits up, the quill falling from her fingers. She blinks and looks first at her desk and then down at Yennefer, still crouched by her chair. Yennefer smiles up at her, hoping to ward off any lingering remnants of this morning's argument.
"Yennefer," Tissaia murmurs, her tongue sticking to the roof of her mouth. She licks her lips and blinks again. "What time is it?"
"Dinner time," Yennefer says, rubbing her thumb back and forth across Tissaia's leg. "I brought you something to eat. I know you must be hungry."
Tissaia glances over at the tray Yennefer brought, the confusion in her eyes dissipating as she wakes more fully. She turns back to Yennefer and brings a hand up to stroke her cheek. Yen's eyes drift closed at the contact and she leans into it.
"I'm sorry," Tissaia says. "For leaving things as we did earlier. I should have stayed and resolved the matter."
Laughing, Yen turns to press a kiss to Tissaia's palm before meeting her eyes. "I've come here to apologise to you. And now you've gone and stolen my thunder!"
Tissaia's face slackens in relief. "Then we are both sorry."
Taking Tissaia's hand from her face, Yennefer stands and urges Tissaia to do likewise. She leans down and kisses her, glad when Tissaia's arms wrap around her waist and pull her closer.
"You mentioned dinner," Tissaia says when they part.
"Mmhmm." Yennefer smiles. "If you're still busy, we can-"
"No." Tissaia shakes her head. "You saw my current level of productivity when you arrived. I'm done for the day." She leans her forehead against Yennefer's neck. "And I want to have dinner with you."
"Very well. Not here, though, if you're done." She conjures a portal to their apartments and nods for Tissaia to go ahead of her while she picks up the tray and follows. After setting the plates down on the small table, Yennefer pulls out Tissaia's chair for her, getting a raised eyebrow for the action. She makes sure Tissaia is seated comfortably before moving to her own chair. She pours wine for each of them.
"I hope you're hungry," Yennefer says, picking up her cutlery. "The kitchens do tend to overdo it when I mention your name."
"It looks delicious," Tissaia says, cutting into her meat. "Thank you for arranging it."
"Think nothing of it," Yennefer says, feeling a bit awkward, like they're dancing around the subject they really should address. "Would you like to discuss what you've been working on?" She lifts both eyebrows. "I'll even let you talk budgets to me. I won't yawn or anything."
Tissaia laughs, and it loosens something in Yennefer's chest. "I shan't put you through that particular torture, darling."
Watching Tissaia eat for a minute before cutting into her own dinner, Yennefer makes a noise of agreement. "You know you can talk to me about your work whenever you need to, don't you?" she asks. "I was being facetious about yawning. I know you have a stressful job and if you need to-"
"Have you been speaking to Triss about this?" Tissaia interrupts, a slight crease forming between her eyebrows.
"Uh-" Yennefer knows she can't lie to Tissaia. Not convincingly, at least. "I, uh, bumped into her earlier. She knew something was wrong so I-" She frowns. "How did you know?"
"Because what you were saying sounded like something Triss would say." Tissaia's lips purse, like she's trying to hide a smile that Yennefer can't help but match.
"Okay, fine." Yennefer pauses. "But she only helped me reach the conclusion I would have reached anyway."
"I'm sure you would have." Tissaia sets her wine down and reaches for Yennefer's hand, squeezing her fingers gently. "I do appreciate the effort."
Yennefer returns the squeeze. "Good. Because Sabrina was also there and you know how much I hate showing any kind of emotion in front of her."
Tissaia rolls her yes. "Indeed." She lets go of Yennefer's hand and picks up her fork. "Tell me about the rest of your day."
Dinner passes in pleasant conversation, where Yennefer relates the escapades of her time with Sabrina and Triss, about Triss' Fayre and the incident with the broken potion bottle. Tissaia smiles and nods and laughs along with her. As they leave the table to move to their bedchamber, Tissaia takes hold of Yennefer's elbow, turning her so that they're facing one another.
"What time are Triss and Sabrina going to this Fayre tomorrow?"
"Hmmm?" Yen is taken completely off-guard by the question. "Oh, some point in the afternoon, I think. Triss mentioned wanting to be there when it got dark because of some procession or other."
Tissaia nods. "Well, if I get up early and get a few hours of work done, how do you think they'd feel if we were to join them?"
Yen breaks into a grin, tugging Tissaia into her arms. "I think Triss will be thrilled, and I think Sabrina will be pissed off that we're infringing on her time with Triss." She drops a quick kiss on Tissaia's nose. "So, two excellent reasons for us to go!" She earns a reproachful glance for this assertion, but ignores it. "Are you sure you can spare the time? I know how I acted this morning, but I don't want-"
A finger comes to rest over her lips and she stops talking. Tissaia shakes her head. "I want to spend time with you." The finger is replaced by a thumb, the pad pressing gently at her lower lip while fingertips graze her cheek. Tissaia swallows before continuing. "I clearly don't show it enough, but you are, always, the highlight of my day."
Blood rushes to Yennefer's cheeks. Even after all these years, an unexpected compliment from Tissaia shifts the ground under her feet and makes her stomach dip. As a person who spent several lifetimes waiting, and longing, to matter to someone, the reality of having just that still catches her unawares. She sighs, blinking back tears, and drops her forehead to rest against Tissaia's. "Well," she begins, her voice gruff. "The same goes for me, with you."
"I know," Tissaia says into the warm space between their mouths. "And I do understand. I feel the same when your duties take you away from Aretuza for any length of time."
"You do?" Yen whispers, her hands finding Tissaia's, fingers tangling.
"Of course." Tissaia frowns. "Again, I'm sorry if you didn't know that." There's a pause, and Tissaia's lips twitch at once side. "Although perhaps that's because I don't act like a spoiled brat when others require your time."
Gasping, Yennefer yanks Tissaia closer, so their fronts are pressed together, noses bumping. "Spoiled brat, eh?" she murmurs, her lips barely brushing Tissaia's cheek. "Is that how I was acting?"
"Yes," Tissaia confirms. Yennefer can feel the increase in Tissaia's heartbeat, feel the tendrils of her chaos start to call out to her own. "You were."
Instead of responding, Yennefer bites Tissaia's earlobe, tugging with her teeth until she hears her hiss, then letting go, her teeth coming together with a clack. She turns to whisper. "How can I make it up to you, Rectoress?"
Tissaia hums in thought, her chaos now vibrating against Yennefer's chest. "Oh, I have a few ideas."
"I bet you do," Yen growls, meeting Tissaia in a hungry kiss. She hadn't expected this of their evening. Tissaia has been so tired lately that they've shared nothing more than a few kisses in bed. That nap at her desk must have worked wonders. She pulls back, smirking when Tissaia whimpers at the loss. She takes her by the shoulders, turning her around and pushing her in the direction of the bedroom. "Go and wait for me." She smacks her backside, earning a scowl. "I'll be in shortly. I want to slip into something more suited to-" She licks her lips. "-penitence."
Lifting an eyebrow, Tissaia nods, trying her best to seem unaffected. But Yennefer doesn't miss the flash of fire in her eyes.
"Very well," Tissaia says, heading to the bedroom. She speaks over her shoulder. "But don't waste a lot of time choosing clothes. You'll be out of them soon enough."
Yen presses her lips together, her own need building at the certainty in Tissaia's voice. Something about that slightly haughty tone always gets her going. She tries not to examine it too closely.
"Yennefer?"
"Mmmhmmm?" Yen calls as she makes short work of their dishes and conjures up an outfit for herself that leaves very little to the imagination.
"Why are there scorch marks all over the fireplace?"
Shit.