Chapter Text
The doctors murmured a diagnosis to themselves. Syma didn't really care much for it, she already knew what she had. Some kind of concussion probably, along with memory loss. She had a throbbing headache and she couldn't remember anything that happened. Maybe she was just a hungover drunk who forgot they went drinking and checked themselves into the hospital, but Syma couldn't remember checking herself into to the hospital either. She couldn't remember a lot. Her memories were wiped, but she retained a bit of information, but still not all of it. Their were gaps here and there, but Syma was relieved she had some kind of recollection and enough knowledge to know that she was missing something.
The doctors knocked on the door and walked in. They were all in their white coats, except a woman next to them. The woman obviously wasn't a doctor or nurse if she was dressed like that, but Syma couldn't remember who they were to her. A family member? A friend? Maybe they were just a complete stranger that found her on the street. Syma continued lying down in her ward bed. She waited for the doctors to say something to her.
"Okay, one last examination before your release," The doctor began. She had already been here for three days, every time they would ask the same questions. Probably to see if her state had gotten worse or better. but Syma was unchanged, also for worse or better. Every time they began this test, Syma would always strain herself to get an answer. She knew that something was missing, and she tried so hard to remember it. It was like have the melody of a song in your head with garbled up lyrics that were wrong. You couldn't just search them up, you had to remember the correct lyrics first, but as the recurring theme had been for the past three days, she couldn't remember. "Name?"
"Syma."
"Last name?" The doctor asked. Syma shook her head. She really shouldn't have done that, it only made the headache worse.
"Birthday?"
"July 13th."
"Age?"
"Twenty-three."
"Family?"
"My mother, Laura and my sister, Lyra."
"Father?"
"Don't know," Syma spoke this time, not wishing to trigger her pain in her brain more.
The same answers every time. Then they asked some basic cognition questions such as the date, season, month, etc. There was one piece of knowledge they had that Syma didn't know why she had. They wouldn't ask her about it, maybe it wasn't basic knowledge then.
Something about reapers.
Well, not something, Syma knew far too much about what a reaper is. She didn't know why, it was just there. She'd asked about reapers for the past two days, but the doctors gave her some weird looked and blamed it on her brain damage. At first she thought she was gonna die if that was on her mind, after all reapers are a symbol of death, but she showed absolutely no signs of that happening. The past day, Syma asked about reapers while that woman was present. They flinched, they must have known something, yet when they were alone with Syma, they wouldn't answer her. The woman wouldn't ever reply to Syma at all, just stare at her torso. It reminded her of something, she waved at her torso, still felt nothing. Apparently there was this huge red X across her torso, but Syma couldn't touch or see it. Only reapers could apparently. It bothered Syma a lot. That red X meant she was a sinner, that she had done something horrible.
Syma didn't think she was a bad person, well, not her, maybe the past Syma was. It bothered her a lot that she had done something bad. She learnt often that bad people are bad because something bad happened to them, which was a lot of bads for one statement, but it stuck. She wondered if her past self had something horrible happen to her that made her that way, and she was scared. She promised to spend this life being happy, because who knew what life would be like once she got her memories back. She promised she'd be a good person now too, she couldn't tell if that would erase the X or not - but maybe it was for the better, after all a good person is selfless, they shouldn't need a motive for doing good.
"You have some brain damage along with amnesia," The doctor reiterated what Syma had already known. "For now, we're putting you under custody of your sister, Lyra. Once she comes to pick you up, you'll be discharged."
"What about that brunette woman over there?" Syma pointed at the woman who ate away at her. "Who is she?"
The woman was already walking away, she waved goodbye towards Syma and the doctors. The doctors shrugged. Syma was slightly concerned they let someone who they didn't know is, but Syma was still alive so it was most likely fine.
She patiently waited in her ward, waiting for her sister to come pick her up. She couldn't even remember what her sister looked like, what if she got in some random strangers car? The doctors knew so she trusted them, but they also like a stranger in so that trust quickly degraded. The boredom of waiting had turned into anxiety. Her sister never visited, neither did her mom, they probably hated her because she was bad. There was the possibility a stranger would pick her up, but what if they hated her so much she wanted her dead? Maybe she'd be safer in a stranger's arms.
Just outside her room's curtains, another voice joined. It was a new one, probably the dreaded sister. She felt like hiding under her blankets, the hospital was nice and safe, albeit boring, but she'd prefer that over death. The curtains opened. Syma cringed. Her sister grimaced at her like she was some lost puppy, but who grimaced at lost puppies?
"You're discharged, loser, I mean my sweet darling sister," The girl smiled, eyeing back the doctors to make sure they hadn't heard. "Get out, and ger in my car." She impatiently tapped her foot waiting for her to get up from the bed.
"What's your name?" Syma jitterly asked.
"Lyra?" She said. "I know you have amnesia and all, but geez, you should know this. Get in the car,"
"Are you kidnapping me?"
"No! Just get in-" Lyra sighed. "You know what? Take your time." She closed the curtains and walked out of the building. Syma slowly followed suite. Lyra hadn't left the building at all, just went around the corner. She had figured Syma wouldn't be able to leave the hospital by herself, so against her better judgement, waited. Lyra led Syma out of the building and into her car. She began driving without saying a word.
After first it was fine, but soon Syma was able to pick up on the atmosphere and social cues. Her sister was really irritated. Syma was pretty sure they lived separately, so she guess her sister wasn't fond of babysitting an adult, or maybe Syma was just that hated.
"Um," Syma began. "Are you mad at me?"
No reply.
"Are you mad at the old Syma? Syma isn't like that anymore! I don't know anything about what I was like, but I swear with the way I am now I'm a good person!"
"Mhm, Syma was also a liar so I don't believe you one bit. Playing the amnesia card to try and get my pity is exactly what you would do."
"I'm not-" Syma had already given up. There was no point, with the tone in her voice there was no way that she would ever change her mind, justifiably so. Using 21 years of evidence versus just the word of today. Syma would love to believe the word of today from everyone, trust is a good trait, but if the past Syma had really hurt everybody that badly then she understood. The ride continued to be silent.
Lyra pulled up to what Syma figured was either Lyra's house or hers. They got out and Lyra jangled with her keys, answering Syma's question. Lyra opened the door and pointed towards the couch.
"I only have one bed, so you sleep there," Lyra ordered. Syma didn't complain. "I have to buy double the groceries now because of you, so don't do anything. Don't wreck anything, don't leave, don't do anything stupid, got it?" Syma nodded obediently. Lyra left the house and locked the door, leaving Syma alone.
Syma lie down on the couch, wasn't as comfortable as the hospital bed, but she didn't want to complain. She was lost in thought, how could she be a good person now? She wanted to start right on it. She wanted to be sincere, do something really kind and unique, but she guess the brain damage affected her intelligence as well. Thirty minutes passed, but all she could think of was charity, the most generic answer.
Syma got up from the couch and wandered the house, looking at what Lyra had. She found a computer in a room with a bed, probably Lyra's room, she wondered if Lyra would be mad for her using it, but Lyra wasn't here. Maybe she was already failing to be a good person, but this was for a good cause. Syma was fortunate she still knew how to use a computer, though the screen looked super bright and blurry to her. She squinted as she typed in 'charity sign-up' in the search bar. She clicked the least sketchy looking site and followed all the instructions, struggling briefly to recall somethings like her email and phone number, or Lyra's phone number since she didn't know what happened to hers, but managed to complete the think to the fullest. She was registered as a volunteer, registration closing right after that, the site read '0 more helpers required' Syma assumed she had gotten it just in time. The event would take place tomorrow, she looked at the address. It seemed familiar so it must have been close by, but she was gonna need Lyra's help with once she got back.
Syma got out of the chair, and though tempted to jump onto Lyra's bed, headed back to her muggy couch. Though the bed probably felt nice, the satisfaction Syma thought she would have from being a good person felt nicer. Helping other and herself by erasing that nasty X off her stomach if not already gone was plenty for Syma needed to feel happy, after all, she couldn't remember where it came from, but she remembered the mentality she kept. The only thing that matters in life is being happy.