Chapter Text
I laid my eyes upon Skyrim's lands, and inhaled deeply. I felt as if my entire being was one with the land. It was breath taking, so unlike Bruma.
"Skyrim... Mother's home." A whisper tickled across my lips, and was carried off by a warm breeze, that urged me on.
I walked with my horse, Felix, down the stony path when suddenly to my right, a shadow darted by.
"Give me your valuables, and I'll think about not killing you." a Breton slurred, with a dagger pointed at me.
"Look just leave, I don't want any trouble." I didn't want any conflict so soon after entering skyrim, even though I knew i could take him.
Instead of leaving, the Breton charged at me, and i had no choice but to burn him with a flame spell and cut him down with my steel sword, my horse never leaving my side, I petted him.
"How?..." was the would-be thief's dying gasp.
Despite how much i told my self i wanted to avoid conflict, i knew this is what i wanted. The short fight was exhilerating. The blood, the adrenaline, the feel of my blade cutting his flesh.. The Blood.
My lips quivered as i looked down at the man i had just slain, saliva filled my mouth on reflex as i looked at the still warm flesh i cut, at the blood that i split.
I was always a-curious- child, i always wanted to know what human, or mer, flesh tasted like. Wondered if other's blood tasted different than my own. BUT! No matter how much i wondered, i held back, i did not want to fall into this curiosity. i did not wish to loose my self...
It was about five and a half months in Skyrim when i found my family... Not my family in Brama, but a new family.
It started when i had lost myself. All the battles with the bandits, vampires, creatures, and the bloody Thalmor agents left me feeling empty, it wasn't as joyful as my first kill. i wanted something more. i did not want a dark soul to kill, to feed to my childhood imaginary friend, Sissy. I wanted an innocent soul, maybe a soul just a bit stained with darkness. i wanted someone living a quiet peaceful life.
it was when i was in Whiterun when i found her...
Her name was Erial Ulfranerson, blond hair so light it was almost while and deep brown eyes, all against a lovely shade of honey colored skin, a true beautiful nord.
Since i was only thirteen at the time, she trusted me right off the bat, what harm could a thirteen year old girl do?
We talked at the local in about her life. She was married, her husband Vulnar was fighting in the war. She was a Priestess of Dibella, until he stole her heart and took her away. She was so cheerful as she talked of him, describing how handsome and kind he was.
"I can't wait until tomorrow, Vulnar is coming home to me. It is going to be wonderful. Its been a whole two months." Her smile so bright i couldn't bare it.
***
'I'm sorry, but i need this. You are so perfect, i must have you. And i'm sure Sissy would love to have you too.' I looked down at her sleeping face, smiling, excited at what i was going to do.
"Come on Erial, wake up." i shook the nord beauty who awoke and looked at me with a smile.
"Well isn't this a surprise, what can i do for you?" She started to get up, but i stopped her.
Bringing my finger to my lips to silence her, i straddled her chest, pushing her back down, i held fast against her mouth as i dragged my Elven dagger across that beautiful honey colored neck of hers.
The dagger cut across her throat in the most beautiful way, smoothly and artistically. The blood had poured achingly slow at first, but then it ran like a glorious sanguine river of innocent life.
Oh! Her eyes were so lovely. They were full of panic, fear, betrail, confusion... This is what i have been wanting, a look like this, not a murderous look that others had given me.
My lips bleed from the bite i give my self as i watched the light fade from her eyes.
Her muffled screams and dying gasps tickled my hand. And when i pulled it away, i found my hand to be covered in her blood.
"Blood... I wonder- I wonder if it tastes like my own..."
I had always kept a check of my carnal desires for the taste of human flesh and blood.
"Surely one lick wouldn't;t hurt. Right?" i asked no one.
The moment my tongue hit her liquid life force, my scenes exploded. i couldn't control myself from lapping it all up, greedily, until my hand was clean of any trace of red.
I sighed heavily with much gusto. My eyes traveled her flesh, 'So beautiful, so... Hungry.'
I indulged myself, biting, tearing, chewing, swallowing, and drinking her flesh and blood. In the back of my mind i knew this was wrong, and i felt sick to my stomach, but i enjoyed this so much. My tongue hungered for more, and i happily obliged, feeding my curiousity and desire for human flesh.
In the two months since then, i have killed- and nibbled on- fifteen people, man, woman, and mer alike. It was then, while eating my fifteenth meal, a dark elf girl who was carelessly wondering around outside of Falkreach.
"Quiet the appetite huh? For murder--and for flesh. But hey, I won't judge. To each our own. Wouldn't you agree?"
It was those words that made me feel like i wasn't a monster. It was those words that freed me from my guilt. And despite my awful habit, i was welcomed warmly into the Dark Brotherhood. My new family accepted me, and i felt content.
But that was about two years ago. I had left shortly after i turned fourteen, after Cicero had stayed with us for a few months. I told Astrid that i wished to go and adventure more, that i would return when i was ready. Sure i was a spoiled brat in those ten months that annoyed everyone but the mad jester who loved my company, but Astrid understood, and wished me luck.
Since then i have studied under the Grey Beards for eleven months, been in the Thief's Guild for two months, ran with the Companions for two months, 'Ugh, the Companions, sure they were nice, but the no killing policy was a bit boring.' I was also in the Bard's college for three months, and the mages' college for five months.... Five months I spent outside of Skyrim.
And now i was ready to go back home. I couldn't wait. To be honest, i would have stayed longer with each group, but Sissy was moving me along, always onto the next one, as if he was preparing me.
Sissy has been with me since i could remember. He had a raspy and deep voice that almost reminds me of the Black Door. Sissy took on a black mist when ever we were alone, and stayed in my head when i was around people. However... one time when i was four, i was out with my friend Sylma when a troll attacked us. Sissy materialized into a great big black figure with a skull mask, i knew it was a mask because it fell off when he checked on me. i couldn't get a good look at his face though.
Sissy materialized to protect me, to kill the awful troll, unfortunately Sylma was not able to receive that help. She was... the first flesh i tasted. i couldn't help it, i was curious as always. Sissy comforted me when i cried after what i did to Sylma. His voice was comforting, he told me it was alright, but to forete this ever happened, that i would remember later. Which i did with the help of Eola, a cannibal, and Namira the Daedric Prince of Decay.
"What- is the music- of life?" the door's voice called to me, drawing my attention away from memories.
"Silence my Brother." How good it felt to be saying those words again.
"Welcome..... Home"