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Violet looked around Clementine’s room and then at her beer, swirling it around as if it were an expensive vintage wine and not just a simple can of Bud Light. She took a sip and grimaced at the bitter taste, ignoring Clementine’s blank stare.
“I don’t see what this has to do with anything,” Clementine said, shoving a wedge of lime into her can.
Whatever, Violet didn’t care enough that it didn’t have any relevance. She swallowed a couple of times, noticing how her tongue felt thick and too big for her mouth. Shrugging it off, Violet sluggishly blurted out a response.
“Does it matter?” Violet drank the rest and resisted throwing it at Clementine’s head, “I just thought it was . . . interesting.”
She wasn’t making fun of Gabe or anything - the poor boy didn’t need someone to make fun of him considering how often he did to himself - she was merely pointing out how ridiculous he acted. And maybe insulting him as she went along, but that wasn’t the point.
Now that she thought about it, there really wasn’t a point at all.
Opening another can, Violet furrowed her brow and watched Clementine sip at her beer hesitantly, her face wrinkling after each tiny taste. What a cute little wimp.
Violet swallowed and savored the bitter linger.
Fuck, maybe she was being a dick.
“Look, maybe you’re right, maybe he does have a crush on me, but I still don’t see how it’s interesting.”
Violet rolled her eyes and sighed. She wasn’t sober enough to have an argument about a dumb boy she barely knew, but she also wasn’t drunk enough to not know how to hold her tongue, and as mildly annoyed as she was the last thing she needed was Clementine to be frustrated with her.
“Clem, it’s interesting because literally everyone sees it but you.”
Clementine set aside the empty can she finished and opened up another one, taking a short drink before shoving in another wedge of lime into the can. Violet leaned her head back onto the bed frame, resisting the urge to belch as the room slowly started to fuzz. She glanced at the full can in her hand and sipped it, thankful that it was the last can she had to drink.
She didn’t understand how Clementine didn’t see the desperation in Gabe’s eyes every time he did something for her, it was pathetic honestly. Seeing the boy follow her like a lost puppy was really starting to irk her. The door holding, the awkward compliment giving, the too loud laughs, the hoodie offerings, it was all grinding on her like an arthritic joint.
Just thinking about it made Violet grit her teeth.
“He’s just being a good friend, I really don’t see what you’re talking about,” Clementine muttered.
Violet raised a brow and rolled her eyes, “Well, he laughs way too loud at any joke you make and it’s just . . . ugh, I don’t know, annoying?” Violet took a deep breath, “And he’s always awkwardly complimenting you too. It’s gross, I don’t wanna have to see that.”
Violet felt her cheeks start to flush and willed herself to calm down, placing the blame for it on the alcohol rather than on her growing frustration. She stared at her socks and felt Clementine’s scrutinizing gaze slicing through her soul. She steeled herself and met her eyes, staring right back, slightly unnerved but too stubborn to look away.
“I guess he does, what else does he do?”
Violet hesitated and tied her scattered thoughts together while drinking the rest of her beer. This wasn’t a conversation she wanted to have, her blood pressure was high enough already, but she would’ve done anything Clementine had asked her to do.
Licking her lips and lining up the three empty beer cans beside her in a straight line, Violet cautiously took the bait.
“He’s always doing all of these . . . favors for you. Always taking your books and duffel bag so you don’t have to hold them, walking you to class and putting your shit down even if it makes him late, holding random ass doors open for you.”
Violet was beginning to realize how petty she was.
Humming and adjusting her hat, Clementine peered at Violet with squinted eyes as she chugged down the rest of her beer. If Violet didn’t know any better, she would’ve thought Clementine was finally beginning to understand her. In reality, she knew Clementine was going to try to assume why Violet was so “fixated” with Gabe’s crush on her.
Rolling her eyes, she waited for Clementine’s psychoanalysis and desperately tried not to squirm. She leaned back against the bed again and closed her eyes, relishing in the spin of the room and the thick cloud beginning to float in her head.
So maybe she was fixated. Maybe getting irrationally angry over a friend holding a door open for Clementine was telling of something bigger, there was no way of possibly knowing that.
Violet sighed and crossed her arms, shamelessly watching Clementine bite her lip for a moment before meeting her brown eyes again. They should’ve sat side by side instead of face to face, Violet was too busy estimating the amount of inches between them instead of trying to focus on “planning” her next step. It was horseshit though, Violet would sit back and let Clementine burn the bridge if it meant she got to stare at Clementine for hours. She slowly blinked and shook her head.
She really needed to pull her head out of her ass but it was way too deep in there.
“I . . . why do you care so much about this?”
She felt the tips of her ears become hot with embarrassment and her empty brain ran through a blank list of excuses she could use. Her hands began to sweat as she spit out the first thing that came to mind.
“I don’t, I’m just . . . waiting for the day you turn him down.”
Violet feigned nonchalance while Clementine suddenly perked up, a dangerous glint in her eyes.
“Oh? And why is that?”
Heart in her throat, Violet felt her mouth go dry. She really should have dropped it when Clementine tied the carrot to the string. Shrugging, Violet tried her best to keep her poker face.
“No reason.”
Clementine shifted, scooting closer to Violet until their knees were almost touching, and slouched, her chin cradled in her hands. She looked up at Violet through her lashes and licked her lips. Violet’s heart skipped a beat and a soft warmth bloomed in her stomach.
“No reason, huh?”
Red colored her cheeks.
“Nope,” Violet popped the p, awkwardly fixing her gaze to the floor.
Clementine hummed and smiled. It made Violet nervous about what Clementine was going to say next, and the haze that fogged her thoughts added to the wary unprepared anxiety that was building deep in her chest. She bit her lip and looked Clementine’s eyes that shone with curiosity. She was definitely fucked.
Clementine flicked Violet’s nose and smirked, “Okay, if you say so.”
Violet could practically feel her brain roll and fall out of her head as she struggled to process the words that seemed to change the atmosphere around them instantly. It felt electric and heavy, and Violet brushed it off as it just been the product of her desperate hope and sudden hypersensitivity to Clementine’s body heat. She shifted and tried her best to keep her hands to herself.
More importantly though, Violet was beginning to think that Clementine knew, and she didn’t know how to feel about it anymore. The ball of unease in her rumbled at the thought.
Violet shook her head and anxiously furrowed her brow with an unsure smile, “What does that mean?”
Clementine leaned in while trying to hide a cocky grin, “Nothing, I just think . . . you’re jealous.” She glanced at Violet’s lips for a millisecond, “And . . . I think you’re stupidly oblivious, even more than me.”
A hot flush washed over Violet’s cheeks and she felt her heart race. Words left her mind and she felt her fingers twitch with an overwhelming urge to grab Clementine by the shirt and kiss her until they were breathless. She bit her tongue and watched Clementine giggle at her bright red face while heat burned in her belly. Violet weakly pushed Clementine’s shoulder and ignored the want to drag her hand down and dig her fingers into Clementine’s bicep to feel the hard muscle there.
“Shut up, I just . . . fuck off, you don’t know that,” Violet laughed nervously and began tracing patterns onto Clementine’s knee. Each new line felt like a shock and made Violet ache.
Clementine smiled and adjusted her hat, “No, I definitely know, the glares you send Gabe are so obvious, Vi.” She smirked and bit her lip, sending Violet’s heart into a sprint, “It’s kinda hot.”
At that moment, the world slowed down and Violet felt like she was in the matrix, dodging bullets like Neo. She raised a brow, leaned in until their faces were inches apart, and felt a response leave her mouth before she could even fully process what Clementine had said.
The realization that she wasn’t dodging the bullets and was in fact throwing herself at each one instead hadn’t set in soon enough, and Violet felt her stomach drop as her mouth pushed out the syllables.
“Then why aren’t we making out right now?”
Violet kept a straight face as Clementine opened and closed her mouth, adorably stunned and pink. It was almost enjoyable seeing their friendship fall apart.
But then the world sped up.
Both of their hooded eyes shut when Clementine grabbed the collar of Violet’s hoodie, and a harsh yank quickly closed the gap between them while Violet frantically moved her hands to cup Clementine’s face. A soft whimper left Clementine's throat as Violet bit her lip, and she clumsily climbed into Clementine’s lap, sending cans clattering across the floor.
She definitely knew.