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It’s during nighttime when everything’s quiet and everybody else has gone to sleep, it is only then that Yoongi and Hoseok turn to look at each other, each enveloped by a sleeping bag on the inside of the camping tent they have set on Hoseok’s backyard.
Their eyes are filled with trust, they still believe in magic and the two of them have secrets they can only confide to the other at this time of the night.
“I’m so bad with girls” Hoseok whispers, wiggling closer to Yoongi.
“That’s not true” Yoongi replies, reaching out to pat Hoseok’s shoulder. “Girls are crazy for you”
Hoseok laughs it off. “Still bad with them. Can’t hyung give me some advice already?”
“No” Yoongi shakes his head. “I’m not interested in girls; how can I give you advice on that?”
It takes Hoseok by surprise but to be honest he really shouldn’t be, if there’s a moment to open one’s heart is right here, right now, with the right company.
“Why aren’t you interested in girls, hyung? They also like you a lot, you have your own cheerleading team at basketball games!”
“Which you lead” Yoongi snorts, making Hoseok blush slightly because it’s true. After a moment of silence Yoongi just shrugs. “I don’t know, I never wanted a girlfriend”
“But,” Hoseok says, wiggling even closer to speak quietly. “You do want a relationship, hyung?”
Yoongi shrugs once more, a kid of few words one might say. “I don’t know. Maybe.”
“Because!” Hoseok continues and says perhaps a little bit too loudly for the quiet of the night. “Because…” He corrects with a whisper. “Maybe I don’t want my relationship to be with a girl. I mean… maybe with some girl. Maybe… with a boy”
“Oh?” Yoongi catches, although not completely. “So you have a boy in mind already? Who is it?” He also wiggles closer, wanting to be up to date with the gossip.
Hoseok pouts and looks away, probably thinking Yoongi is teasing him. “Hyung…” He whispers.
“Yeah?” Yoongi asks expectantly.
“It’s hyung…” Hoseok replies, even quieter than before.
But Yoongi catches on nonetheless and he is surprised, he really wasn’t expecting that, for Hoseok to be the same as him, for Hoseok to like him!
“Bull!” Yoongi calls out.
“Nooo” Hoseok whines. “Seriously! Please stop, this is embarrassing! Just don’t hate me!”
Then Yoongi scoffs and reaches out to cup Hoseok’s cheek. “Seokseok… even if you had told me you liked my older brother I could never hate you”
“Promise?” Hoseok asks hopefully.
“Promise.”
There isn’t a question to ask, at least not yet. The two of them spend the night stargazing into each other’s eyes until it’s very late and both can no longer keep their eyes open.
--
It’s their third and last grade of high school. Hoseok has joined the dance team and met a wonderful little kid named Jimin that comes along with a little demon’s spawn called Taehyung that always wants Yoongi’s attention on him. Despite their respective parasites following them everywhere, the dance team captain and the basketball superstar, they find their time to be by themselves.
Especially since Hoseok discovered weed and got both of them into a relaxed and silly state of mind every time they were too stressed, they didn’t want to be a bad example to the kids. Sometimes they joked about them being a married couple and Jimin and Taehyung being their sons, only when they were really high, though.
“I can’t seem to get a girlfriend” Hoseok complained one of those days they were sitting on the benches of the field behind the school, sharing a blunt in their free time.
“Get a boyfriend then,” Yoongi said like it was obvious.
“Can’t! You know my dad would kick me out of the house”
“Perks of not having a dad” Yoongi shrugged.
Yoongi’s father had left around four years ago, nobody knew where he could be but they knew very well he wasn’t exactly missing, he had the decency to leave a small note saying something along the lines of ‘being a dad and husband is hard, I quit’ Yoongi had taken advantage of the chaos and came out to his mom, brother and grandma.
They almost didn’t care because there were more urgent things to deal with. Once everything had calmed down they had all sat down with him and it took Yoongi a good year or so to convince them he had been gay waaaaay before his dad stepped out of the house. Once they realized that, they left him alone and accepted him completely.
Yoongi seemed happier and more relaxed ever since.
Might sound harsh but- indeed, the perks of not having a dad.
Hoseok on the other hand was glad his parents supported him on his wish to dedicate himself to dance, it was going to be a hard road ahead of him but they trusted him and knew he was the best at whatever he put his heart into. They knew someday Hoseok was going to make it big no matter what he wanted to do, if it was dance then that’s what it was.
But they were very set on Hoseok not having any piercings, tattoos were completely banned, he either got tatted’ and pierced or he kept being his parents’ son, he couldn’t have both. They also expected him to get a nice girlfriend from a good family, to get married, and give his parents a couple of grandchildren. And, well, is not like Hoseok didn’t like girls but he certainly didn’t prefer them.
“Seok” Yoongi snapped his fingers in front of Hoseok’s face. “You zoned out for a moment there, you okay?”
“Y-yeah. I’m okay. Just… wishing I was you”
Yoongi honest to God just laughed with his whole body. Hoseok had always liked seeing him laugh like that, it was like something Yoongi only shared when in Hoseok’s company and that made him feel special.
“Why the fuck would you want to be me?” Yoongi giggled.
And, well, that was a hard question. Because, to be honest, Hoseok doesn’t really want to be Yoongi but rather he wants to have Yoongi share with him what makes him him. Like his honest smiles, his serious face when he's working on math problems, his tears when he’s overwhelmed by life itself. Hoseok wants from Yoongi everything the elder is willing to give.
“Hyung” Hoseok started, coming closer to Yoongi. “What if we are single forever? What then?”
Yoongi stared at him like he was crazy but seemed to consider the situation nonetheless.
“Then we marry each other” Yoongi said, a sleepy but serious expression on his face.
“Promise?”
“Promise”
The kiss they share then to seal their pact may be chaste and short but it is full of commitment.
--
“YOU WHAT?!” Hoseok screeches over the phone.
“I said yes. It seems unbelievable but I did say yes” Yoongi replies calmly over the phone, his eardrums hurt a little bit from Hoseok’s scream but it’s nothing he can’t deal with, he has gotten used to it since they left to different universities and needed to call each other to communicate.
“But… Taehyung? Seriously? I would have guessed Jimin was more your type…”
Yoongi sighs. “He can be quite sweet when he wants, Jimin doesn’t know when to keep his mouth shut and Taehyung really has settled down over the years, he’s not the hyperactive little kid we used to know”
“I mean!” Hoseok tries to amend. “I don’t have anything against Taehyung, especially not against you and him being… a thing”
“Boyfriends, Hoseok” Yoongi clarifies. “We’re boyfriends”
“Sorry” Hoseok sighs. “I’m sorry. It’s just weird”
Yoongi laughs and Hoseok knows he isn’t mad at him. “It’s quite okay. But enough about me, tell me about your week, do you have anything going on?”
Hoseok doesn’t have anything interesting to say, nothing that can overcome the news of his favorite person in the world and Taehyung being together. However, he tells Yoongi about how they assigned him a small group of little kids to teach them dance and he actually is gaining a fraction of money from teaching them.
He has been on and off relationships for some time now, he can’t seem to settle with a girlfriend for a long time, there is this girl named Hwasa who is a queen at dancing and Hoseok feels some degree of physical attraction over her but nothing else, she’s his type but Hoseok simply… doesn’t want to be with her.
Yoongi is happy for him and tells him to give more girls a chance to do more than just warm his bed, which is crass but Hoseok gets it.
He tries to convey positive emotions on his congratulations over Yoongi’s new relationship, although he knows he’s not being completely sincere.
--
“What age do you think it’s good for a deadline?”
“For what? Yoongi asks, lifting carefully a heavy cardboard box containing some of his belongings.
“For marriage, hyung!”
Hoseok has to rush to Yoongi to avoid the elder from dropping the box full of things. He caught him off guard. It has been some time now since Taehyung and Yoongi broke up because they realized they didn’t really have that much in common when referring to affection.
Yoongi preferred thoughtful and subtle actions over words and Taehyung liked to be practically joined to the hip with his boyfriend. They endured a year and a half and then simply exploded and moved Jimin in with them to avoid complete awkwardness between them. Not long before that Jimin and Taehyung got together and Yoongi was genuinely happy for them, even if it meant he had to move out of the apartment because aside from his room the whole apartment had turned into a love nest for the birdies, Yoongi couldn’t take it.
Hoseok had come back and had gotten a job at a famous dance academy as a teacher, it paid off well but he still could need some help with the rent.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes,” Yoongi replied way too quickly. “Just… what are you talking about?”
Hoseok made an undignified sound. “What! Our promise, hyung!”
Yoongi avoided looking at him, most likely because he already knew what Hoseok had been talking about. He was single and so was Hoseok and it had been some time since he last had a girl over at his room for the night.
“Help me get this down to the car, would you?”
“Of course!”
They went down the elevator in silence, at least for the first few floors, then Yoongi blurted out…
“Thirty”
Hoseok didn’t understand at first but his brain quickly caught up to Yoongi’s words.
“Promise?”
“Promise”
--
Yoongi wakes up with the sunlight.
It’s still early for the room has not started overheating yet, he takes a moment to take a big breath and to let his eyes get adjusted to the light.
Today it’s Hoseok’s birthday, he knows this almost by instinct. It is weird for him to do something else apart from thinking how much he’d rather stay in bed all day instead of getting out of it to get his life together but on Hoseok’s birthday, of course, the first thing his mind and body do is to search for his phone to send him a congratulatory text.
Seok-ah. Hbd. I’ll see you later in the day to give you a gift.
Yoongi is not particularly known for giving out splendid gifts on anyone’s birthdays but he’s made a tiny exception with Hoseok, he never goes overboard but always manages to hit the stop right in between sentimental and sarcastic and every time Hoseok loves it, so he takes that as a win.
Neither of them is a morning person but there’s always the knowledge that Yoongi’s never going to forget to congratulate Hoseok on his birthday first thing after he opens his eyes in the morning.
Not a minute after having sent the text, Yoongi receives a call, and although he wholeheartedly knows who’s calling he still takes a second to look at the screen of his phone instead of immediately answer. Of course, it’s Hoseok and of course, he picks up the call by the second.
“Happy thirtieth birthday, hyung” Hoseok replies with an air of mischief and Yoongi starts to wonder what is he missing from that statement.
“Yeah” Yoongi decides to agree easily instead of wondering. “Welcome to the third floor, Hoseok. You’ll only get older from now on”
Hoseok laughs at his nihilist comment because he knows Yoongi’s negative thoughts sometimes just fly out of his mouth without him being able to process them first.
“That had been true from the moment I was alive, hyung. Tell me something I don’t know like… what is this gift you’ll give me, huh?”
Yoongi laughs breathily into the phone and shuffles around in bed a little, body getting used to being awake. “Well… I was planning on treating you to dinner. It doesn’t have to be just the two of us, you can ask anybody to come”
“Actually” Hoseok immediately replies. “I’d rather be just the two of us if that’s fine with you?”
“Hmm” Yoongi agrees. “I’ll pick you up, okay? Be ready by seven”
By seven-thirty Hoseok and Yoongi are at Hoseok’s favorite restaurant, ordering food left and right and recalling the good old times and everything they did, everything they didn’t have the chance to.
They eat and they drink, albeit a little less than what they used to in their early twenties, sadly they have come to the time where they should definitely watch better what they eat and drink if they don’t want to end up with weak muscles and early wrinkles.
“So,” Hoseok says as he stretches after they have finished their food. “I am a little nervous but… I did say I preferred if it was just the two of us, remember?”
“Yeah” Yoongi nods easily, giving his drink another big gulp which to him is the norm, he learned to drink younger than most and can hand his alcohol just as well.
Hoseok seems to hesitate but he recovers quickly. “Well, that was for a reason” He seems to pat himself in the back on the back of his mind before continuing. “Maybe… what I’m going to say is going to sound stupid but, uh, remember about the promise we made?”
Yoongi snorts. “We’ve made plenty of them, haven’t we? Go on”
Hoseok bites his bottom lip and Yoongi has the impulse to tell him to stop but Hoseok seems to gain determination once again before speaking.
“I’m talking about… Well, today is my thirtieth birthday, right?” He waited until Yoongi nodded. “And… we’ve both been single for a while, right?” Yoongi nods once again and so Hoseok goes on. “And we… we promised?”
Yoongi frowns a little seeing Hoseok hesitate so much and not going straight to the point is something new, definitely. He tries to think back to a promise they may have made, possibly a long time ago, enough for him to not immediately remember as he usually would.
But then everything comes back to his mind like a slap.
His glass slips from his hand. There’s a gasp and Hoseok’s very recognizable screech as he stands up to avoid getting his pants drenched with beer. Yoongi, on the other hand, is blushing furiously and is unable to move at all, at least not until there’s a waitress running towards him with towels to clean up the mess and urging him to stand up.
The front of his pants is drenched, he looks like he’s peed himself, he’s blushing like he did too.
It’s a nightmare come true.
About five minutes later they flee the restaurant after apologizing profusely and leaving a large tip for the poor woman who had to clean up after Yoongi’s mess.
They get into the car and settle into an uncomfortable dead silence before Yoongi starts the engine and starts to drive aimlessly.
A few seconds later, Hoseok speaks. “I didn’t think the idea was so… unappealing. I’m sorry”
“No” Yoongi quickly replies. “It’s absolutely not your fault, you did nothing wrong. I’m the asshole who doesn’t know how to deal with a flood of feelings and makes disasters on his way. God damn it, that’s exactly the reason why Taehyung and I didn’t work out at all, we’re both fucking idiots and we fought a lot”
“I’m glad you didn’t last” Hoseok confesses.
This shocks Yoongi as well, though this time he’s not as surprised and much more conscious of the fact that he’s driving a car and this is precisely the time he should keep his shit together.
“It would have broken my fucking heart if you married Taehyung. I would have had to revenge-marry Jimin or something like that” Hoseok says, dead serious.
Yoongi snorts, he actually feels laughter bubbling up and he pulls over to let it all out. He laughs for a good moment, finding everything in Hoseok’s statement amusing. The idea that Hoseok has wanted him so much for this long and yet he had been waiting until his thirtieth birthday to say anything, to make the slightest of moves.
When he finally manages to stop his laughter, he notices Hoseok is looking at him fondly with a little bit of shyness emanating out of him.
“I would have never married Taehyung” Yoongi states, breathless as he is, but he’s got to get Hoseok to understand this. “Not when I have always wanted to marry you”
Hoseok blushes furiously and he looks almost in shock.
“Y-you do?”
Yoongi doesn’t resist the urge to get as close to Hoseok as he can despite the impossibilities of the space in the car, he cups Hoseok’s cheeks and then squeezes slightly making the other man groan.
“How could I not? It’s always been you”
“Except when it was Taehyung…” Hoseok mumbles.
Yoongi is taken aback once again by how affected Hoseok really was of his relationship with Taehyung. He had never noticed anything weird about Hoseok when he had been boyfriends with the younger man, not a hint of jealousy, always soft smiles and loud laughter, and talking about the girls he was briefly with.
He wonders for a moment if all of that talk about being happy and having plenty of women to enjoy life with had been exclusively to bring jealousy to Yoongi, if only he had been more self-confident he would have noticed if that had been the case, perhaps. Because he can’t deny that he was only doing the things he did to convince himself he could fall in love with another person who wasn’t Hoseok. In the end it had been fruitless despite how much Hoseok threw bullets at his heart with his seemingly endless trail of women following after him. He wonders how much of that was actually real and how much of it was an act, just like Yoongi was pretending.
“Hoseok,” Yoongi said, shaking Hoseok’s head with his hands. “It has always been you. Taehyung was just… my attempt of giving you the chance to be happy”
“I’m happy when I’m with you” Hoseok smiles.
“Then, Hoseok… about our promise…” Yoongi says, bringing his hands down from Hoseok’s cheeks to his shoulders. “Wanna talk about it?”
Hoseok smiles big and bright, he nods with enthusiasm. “Yeah… let’s talk about it”
--
Four years later, Yoongi is opening his eyes to the sun hitting him on the face. He grunts and struggles to open his eyes, however, the effort is well rewarded when he sees Hoseok already looking at him, on the other side of the bed but just as close to him as he has always been.
“Morning” Hoseok mumbles.
Yoongi has no energy to respond but he grunts in acknowledgment. He doesn’t feel like waking up yet so he scoots closer to Hoseok and lets the man envelop him in his arms, Yoongi rests his head on Hoseok’s chest and snuggles close and closer. He feels like life has been perfect for a while now, all in Hoseok’s arms.
It seems like that’s the place where he belongs.
He has always known that, after all.