Archive of Our Own

It was another ordinary day for Tanjirou with him getting chased by the gym teacher, Tomioka Giyuu, and catching perverts around the precinct until he stumbled on a conversation - one that wasn’t supposed to be heard by him.

He was walking back home after sending another pervert to the police station when he received a text message from his youngest brother begging him to get a caramel pudding. He smiled, replying with a cute sun sticker saying ‘I got it’.

After getting the caramel pudding his brother so desperately wanted from the market, he was about to head home until his youngest sister called him and asked him to get the famous strawberry shortcake from the cake shop just a few steps away from where he was. He said okay to her promptly and got into the moderately long queue at the cake shop.

While lining up, Tanjirou was met with a surprise to see Shinobu and Aoi in front of him. He grinned, raising his arms in an attempt to greet them. He was about to call out their names until he heard what they were talking about.

“One of my classmates was going crazy that day when I told her that Uzui-san has something going on with Rengoku-san. She just wouldn’t stop blabbering on how Uzui-san only has his eyes on Zenitsu when it’s not true. Like come on, it’s not news that they hate each other’s guts!” Aoi said, sounding a little angry and impatient.

“My my,” Shinobu chuckled. “Wouldn’t it be more appropriate to conclude it as a love triangle? I’m pretty sure Zenitsu doesn’t hate Uzui-san.”

Aoi raised her eyebrows, “For real? I still remember that one time Zenitsu ran out of the art room with tears. Everyone in the school pretty much heard him screaming on how Uzui-san was a huge jerk.”

“Well, I do remember seeing how disheveled his uniform was,” Shinobu commented casually.

Aoi rubbed her chin, “Do you think they did something in the art room?”

Shinobu merely smiled as she stated, “Your imagination is already answering it.” Aoi blushed and lowered her head slightly in embarrassment when she understood the meaning behind Shinobu’s words.

Meanwhile, Tanjirou was frozen on his spot as he tried to comprehend their conversation. The information was immense and shocking to him. Well, he was there when Zenitsu escaped from the art room, but he had completely overlooked the fact the disheveled state his friend was in. His cheeks were suddenly red the moment a dirty thought hit his head; his face was burning up so much and he felt like he was on fire.

“Tanjirou, eavesdropping is a bad thing,” Shinobu said as she turned to Tanjirou with an ambiguous smile. Aoi, not noticing Tanjirou’s presence, was even more embarrassed.  

Tanjirou inhaled sharply and waved his arms around nervously, “I-I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to-”

“And you’re trying to say you didn’t mean it?” Shinobu asked. Sighing, she faked a disappointed face as she added, “How disappointing, Tanjirou.”

“I’m truly sorry for eavesdropping! It’s my fault for not greeting first!” Tanjirou apologized earnestly. “I’ll do anything to make it up to the both of you!”

Shinobu smiled in amusement. “Anything?” She asked, “Are you sure?”

Tanjirou nodded vigorously.

Shinobu nudged Aoi and winked at her. Aoi blinked in confusion for a moment until Shinobu said, “Tanjirou, you’re going to play the cupid.” Aoi covered her mouth, suppressing a laugh when she finally understood Shinobu’s intention.

Rengoku’s favorite student was Tanjirou, which wasn’t a very obvious fact. He rarely showed favoritism, knowing perfectly well that a teacher shouldn’t be giving special treatment to a certain student just because he had a crush.

It was a Tuesday and he was having history with Tanjirou’s class in the afternoon. The class couldn’t be any more ordinary until he realized something – Tanjirou was not asking him questions and he was just sitting there quietly as if his enthusiasm was drained out of him. At first, he thought that Tanjirou was probably feeling under the weather, so he refrained from calling the redhead. Directing his attention away, he started teaching.

History class ended when the bell rang and Rengoku found his gaze following Tanjirou as they stepped out from the classroom. He saw Tanjirou giving Uzui a beautiful smile, and he would be lying if he said he wasn’t bothered by the fact that Tanjirou was having a lively conversation with his colleague.

Rengoku went back to the teachers’ office with a tight-lipped smile. He felt his heart burning in jealousy, not understanding the reason behind Tanjirou’s indifference during his class. Was his class getting boring? A sigh escaped his lips, and it was a rare occurrence. He was not one to sigh. Pouring some green tea into his cup and drinking it, he started contemplating.

Should he ask Tanjirou to see him in private?

“Rengoku-san!” Tanjirou called, snapping Rengoku out of his thoughts.

Rengoku looked up immediately, a dazzling smile shaping his handsome features as he asked, “What’s up, Kamado boy?”

“I was kind of drowsy in class just now because I didn’t get much sleep yesterday,” Tanjirou’s voice was getting softer as he said, “What I’m trying to say is, I… didn’t listen to anything Rengoku-san had said, so can you explain everything again to me please?”

How  ̶f̶u̶c̶k̶i̶n̶g̶  adorable.

“Of course, Kamado boy!” Rengoku chortled. “Feel free to ask me anytime!”

Tanjirou beamed, immediately taking the chair beside Rengoku and placing his notebook on the desk.

Rengoku couldn’t hide his contentment and his voice was louder than usual, but no one was in the teacher’s office except for Sanemi, who was trying his best not to tear his students’ assignment papers into pieces. It definitely wasn’t a big deal, Rengoku thought. He knew Sanemi would be able to filter the noise. And he was wrong because Sanemi was glaring daggers at him.

“Shall we start?” Rengoku asked as he pulled his chair closer to Tanjirou, who was staring at the framed picture that was rested on his desk. Giving a light tap on the redhead’s shoulder, he found himself asking, “Is there a problem, Kamado boy?”

Tanjirou shook his head and peered at the framed picture with suspicion, “The frame looks familiar. I think I’ve seen it somewhere before.”

“Oh, you must’ve seen it in the art room! Uzui was the creator behind this magnificent frame!” Rengoku laughed gleefully as he gushed about how talented Uzui was. It was perfectly common for him to exaggerate his compliments, especially when Uzui was his best friend, but Tanjirou seemed to think the other way.

It took almost fifteen minutes for Rengoku to finish talking about Uzui, and when he noticed that Tanjirou was smiling at him like a proud mom, an uneasy feeling crept up his chest. He laughed, ignoring how he was feeling. He apologized to Tanjirou for going off-topic and finally, their tutoring session commenced.

Rengoku was impressed yet again by Tanjirou’s ability to absorb a whole chapter within half an hour, and explaining all the contexts with accurate details. Tanjirou was no doubt an intelligent boy and it was admirable, but his humbleness made him even more lovable than he already was. Rengoku could never get enough of him, and he admitted that he was head over heels for him.

“Before I go, Rengoku-san,” Tanjirou closed his notebook as he asked, “Can I take some pictures of you?”

Rengoku widened his eyes in confusion momentarily. He was taken aback by Tanjirou’s shocking request, but he agreed to it eventually. If he had known that his pictures would be given to someone else, he would never agree to it. God knows why he did that without thinking twice.

*

Rengoku was acting strange lately and Uzui knew his best friend was hiding something from him.

Uzui was curious, of course. But, he was never the type to stick his nose in someone else’s business. He knew Rengoku would tell him soon, or maybe never. It didn’t matter if Rengoku chose to keep to himself. Everyone had their little secrets.

Uzui had a secret. He was in love with one of his students, Kamado Tanjirou. He didn’t know when it exactly happened. As a teacher, he was aware of the consequences. He wasn’t supposed to fall for a teenage boy who was still growing, but he couldn’t help it.

Uzui was mildly interested in Tanjirou due to his perception of art, to begin with. He merely thought of him nothing more as that one student who shared a similar taste with him. He started paying attention after seeing the way Tanjirou described things. He couldn’t understand a single thing, but still, he was fascinated.

He was the type to get jealous easily and currently, he wanted to throw a certain blondie out of the window. “Keep your dirty claws to yourself, Agatsuma. Kamado is trying to paint something flamboyant and you’re distracting him.”

Zenitsu’s tear dam burst immediately as he sobbed, “T-Tanjirou, am I distracting you?” 

“No, you’re not,” Tanjirou answered as he smiled fondly at Zenitsu. “I’m fine, Uzui-san. Zenitsu is not bothering me. He’s just learning by watching how I paint.”

Uzui rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”

While Tanjirou was busy with his painting, Zenitsu gave Uzui a triumphant smile.

Fucking two-faced, Uzui hissed mentally.

“I have an important announcement to make,” Uzui coughed, gaining the attention of everyone in the art room. “I’m sure you know tomorrow’s a flamboyant day for me. I expect to get something from everyone.”

The bell rang and Uzui picked up his stuff. “Consider this as one of your assignments. Class dismissed.” He said before leaving the art room.

“Oh god, is he serious in making this annual?!” A male student scowled. “I didn’t buy shit!”  

Another male student sighed, “I got his favorite wine brand for him last year and was given a C.” He sighed again and asked, “Has anyone gotten an A from this last year?”

“Tanjirou did!” Zenitsu exclaimed.

The girl sitting behind Tanjirou poked him. “Have you prepared a gift already?” She asked curiously.

Tanjirou nodded confidently and announced that he had been preparing it since a week ago, making everyone in the room to sigh in defeat. That’s the difference between a model student and a normal student.

Uzui had woken up feeling extremely good. It was his birthday and he couldn’t wait to grade his beloved students badly to see them suffer. Tanjirou was an exception, of course. He didn’t have art with Tanjirou’s class today, so they would have to meet him at the teacher’s office.

Tanjirou was the first one just as he had expected.

“Happy birthday, Uzui-san!” Tanjirou cheered as he handed a pink envelope to Uzui.

Uzui smirked. The pink envelope reminded him of those love letters he received back in high school. He ruffled Tanjirou’s hair and thanked him. The envelope was thick and Uzui couldn’t guess what was inside.

“Is this some sort of love letter or-”

There were about five to seven pictures of Rengoku in the pink envelope. Uzui felt like he was struck by lightning. He was flummoxed, utterly speechless by the current situation. How was he supposed to react? Was this some sort of prank?

“I’ll give you all my support, Uzui-san,” Tanjirou said as he held Uzui’s hands. “Rengoku-san is an amazing person. He’ll make you happy.”

What the fuck?

Uzui furrowed his brows in displeasure. “Are you misunderstanding something, Tanjirou? Rengoku and I are just friends. We’re definitely not a thing, and we’ll never be.”

“I’m sorry, I misunderstood the whole situation!” Tanjirou apologized loudly as he bowed to Uzui.

Uzui grabbed Tanjirou’s shoulders firmly. “I’m going to said this once, so you better listen properly.” He said. “The person I like is around a hundred and sixty-five centimeters tall. He has flamboyant hair and pretty features. He is smart and just too cute for his own good.”

“I understand now!” Tanjirou shouted.

Uzui heaved a sigh of relief. “Good.” He said. “I’m giving you another chance and make sure you submit something flamboyant tomorrow.”

Tanjirou raised his arm in a salute. “Roger that!”

The next day, Uzui received a bundle of Zenitsu’s pictures from Tanjirou.

The grades for the “birthday assignment” were revealed a few days later on a piece of paper stapled on the announcement board in the teacher’s office.

An F was right next to Tanjirou’s name and he didn’t know what could’ve possibly gone wrong. Was his approach bad? Was he over-prying? He sighed in disappointment and went back to his classroom. The classroom was empty the moment he got there. The other students had probably gone home.

However, it wasn’t time for him to go home yet because he was on duty. Taking the broom, he started sweeping the floor with dexterity. Just then, his phone vibrated and a notification popped up.

The Pretty Committee

kanzaki_aoi (3:35pm)
I heard you got an F for that weird bday thingy, Tanjirou! Is that true?

He had gotten a message from a group chat named The Pretty Committee. It consisted of five members including him. He was the only boy in the group and the sole reason of him being added was – Shinobu wanted him to play cupid for their ships, which he didn’t understand what it meant, but he accepted anyway, without complaining because he was told that his friends (and teachers) had been struggling with their love life.

Poor Tanjirou. He didn’t know the stories were all nothing but fantasies.

Stopping the task in hand, he replied.

Tanjirou0714 (3:35pm)
Yes T-T I don’t know what went wrong.
Uzui-san got so mad at me when I gave him Zenitsu’s pics.

kanzaki_aoi (3:36pm)
That’s weird…
but Uzui-san’s descriptions fit perfectly with Zenitsu!!

makomakomo (3:36pm)
maybe he’s just shy
i’m still salty that uzui x rengoku is not a thing

kanzaki_aoi (3:37pm)
Well Tanjirou did tell us abt how Rengoku-san fanboyed over that whatever pic frame
alsoooo I saw them going out tgt yesterday

shinobuK (3:37pm)
oh my
I’m sorry that you got an F becuz of us, Tanjirou

Tanjirou0714 (3:38pm)
No!! It’s fine! I was the one who wanted to do it :(

“Tanjirou!” Zenitsu screamed as he stomped angrily into their classroom, causing Tanjirou to jolt in surprise. “I saw the list of grades just now and I can’t believe you got an F! What was that pervert thinking of when he failed you?!”

Tanjirou slipped his phone into his pockets in a flash, turning awkwardly to Zenitsu. “I thought you went home.”

Zenitsu sighed in exasperation. “I had committee meeting just now and I pretty much wanted to jump down the window when that spartan gave me more work as a punishment for having blonde hair. How many times do I have to tell him? It’s hundred-percent natural!” Rubbing his cheeks in frustration, he felt the urge to cry, so he did.

Tanjirou took Zenitsu into his arms, hugging him as he cooed, “Don’t worry, Zenitsu. I’ll help you with your work.”

Zenitsu sniffled and wrapped his arms around Tanjirou’s waist as he nuzzled up against him. As he pressed his head on Tanjirou’s chest, he heard the redhead’s heartbeats. The sound of Tanjirou’s heartbeats sounded unusually soothing. He was able to feel less agitated, but he still couldn’t stop crying as he exclaimed, “You’re the best, Tanjirou! What would I do without you?”

“Go home if you’re not on duty, Agatsuma.”

A familiar voice cut through the air, making Tanjirou raise his head. Uzui was standing at the entrance with crossed arms.

“Zenitsu, you should head home first,” Tanjirou said as he tapped Zenitsu’s back.

Zenitsu shook his head as he whined, saying that he would wait for Tanjirou.

“Stop clinging on him, Agatsuma,”Uzui said coldly. Tanjirou was surprised for a moment when Uzui was suddenly right next to them, trying to pull Zenitsu away. Sensing a tug at his back collar, Zenitsu tightened his grip, showing no signs of leaving Tanjirou’s arms. “This is not flamboyant of you, Agatsuma. Let Kamado do his freaking work, okay?”

“Why are you always sticking your nose into my business, you pervert?!” Zenitsu chided.

Uzui narrowed his eyes in anger, “Huh? You’re the one always getting in my way!” He hissed, finally hauling Zenitsu away from Tanjirou. “And now, I’m going to drag your ass home so that Kamado can finish his work in peace.”

Tanjirou’s lips quivered in excitement as he watched Uzui dragging Zenitsu out of the classroom.

Taking his phone out immediately, Tanjirou typed.

Tanjirou0714 (3:55pm)
Uzui-san took Zenitsu home!

kanzaki_aoi (3:55pm)
Omgomg tell me everything

makomakomo (3:55pm)
just finished club and saw them at the parking lot
zenitsu’s carried on the shoulders asdfgh
ok uzui x zenitsu is now my new religion

Tanjirou0714 (3:56pm)
Yes! I was there when Uzui-san lifted Zenitsu!
Uzui-san said: “I’m going to drag your ass home.”

flower.kanao (3:56pm)
!

Tanjirou0714 (3:56pm)
What’s wrong, Kanao?

shinobuK (3:57pm)
She’s just shocked that you typed ass :)

Tanjirou0714 (3:57pm)
Eh?
But that’s exactly what Uzui-san said?

kanazaki_aoi (3:58pm)
Wow that’s-

makomakomo (3:58pm)
also r we just going to ignore the fact that uzui-san knows where zenitsu lives

*

Zenitsu angrily plopped on the passenger seat as he muttered some swear words. He was surprised at himself as he wasn’t one to swear, but truthfully, it was tough to contain it.

He used to think that it was difficult for him to hate someone until Uzui became his art teacher. He had nothing against the man initially, though he didn’t have a good impression. Uzui was always flirting with female students during classes and he was much chagrined by it.

A teacher should be doing their job seriously, but Zenitsu failed to see it from Uzui.

The moment of dislike started when Uzui destroyed the art room with dynamite. It was extremely dangerous and his actions had greatly endangered everyone. And who on earth would bring freaking dynamite to school?

Uzui was suspended for a month after that incident and it couldn’t have been better for Zenitsu.

Zenitsu’s dislike grew into resentment after noticing Uzui’s growing affections to his childhood friend and crush, Tanjirou. He couldn’t stand seeing Tanjirou getting teased even though the redhead was too oblivious in realizing that the man was messing with him.

One day, he confronted Uzui regarding his “issue” with Tanjirou. He was supposed to be afraid of confrontations, and yet he dared to do it. He was a coward by nature, so he felt rather proud of himself for not shitting his pants. However, fear struck him when he was gripped by his collars.

“You don’t get to tell me what to do, Agatsuma.”

Zenitsu bit his lips.

“A coward like you should just shut up and mind your own business.”

Pushing Uzui away, Zenitsu escaped the art room with teary eyes. Uzui was right. A coward like him had no right to stop someone else from courting Tanjirou. Despite knowing that, he still hated Uzui for trying to steal Tanjirou away. Rubbing his eyes in frustration, he screamed.

“UZUI-SAN IS A JERK!!!”

It was embarrassing though.

The whole school heard him.

Zenitsu cringed at his memories and rolled his eyes inwardly. He turned to the driver’s seat and stared at Uzui. Sensing his gaze, Uzui glanced at him and asked, “Where do you live?”

“Just go straight down this street,” Zenitsu answered. “I’ll ask you to stop when I see my house.”

Uzui hummed.

Zenitsu told Uzui to stop the moment a traditional Japanese house entered his sight. Thanking the man unwillingly, he removed the seatbelt and opened the door. “Before I go, I want to ask something.”

Uzui gestured him to go on.

“Why did you give Tanjirou an F?” asked Zenitsu.

Uzui paused momentarily before asking, “Are you sure you want to know?”

Zenitsu nodded.

Uzui handed Zenitsu a thick bundle of pictures.

“What are these- Wait, why do you have my pictures?!” Zenitsu shrieked as a look of horror crossed his face. Untying the bundle, he went through all the pictures. “These are taken by Tanjirou. Why do you have them?”

Uzui sighed. “He gave them to me.”

Zenitsu shook his head in disbelief, “This can’t be true. You’re joking.”

“Tsk, ask him yourself if you don’t believe me.” Uzui hissed in annoyance and drove away after Zenitsu had gotten out of his car.

Uzui’s word ultimately sank in and Zenitsu needed an answer from Tanjirou. He took his phone out and messaged Tanjirou.

thunderclap_flash (4:10pm)
tanjirou…
did you give uzui-san my pictures?

Tanjirou0714 (4:11pm)
Yes! ( ๑ •̀ ㅂ • ́ )و ✧
But don’t worry!!
The pictures were chosen carefully and the quality is guaranteed!

thunderclap_flash (4:11pm)
tanjirou the thing is..

Tanjirou0714 (4:11pm)
No worries, Zenitsu!
I know dating a teacher is hard, but you have my full support!!

thunderclap_flash (4:12pm)
TANJIROU
WE R NOT DATING!!!!!!!!!!

Tanjirou0714 (4:12pm)
Eh?????
But you two… did it in the art room?

Zenitsu dropped his phone.

*

Tanjirou received a call from Zenitsu shortly afterward. His best friend was crying so much that it made him felt guilty. Was he wrong in assuming that Zenitsu and their art teacher were together? But then, he didn’t see the reason for Shinobu to lie.

“I’m sorry, Zenitsu. I misunderstood again.”

Zenitsu continued to sob, “The person I like is pretty, good in sports and just slightly taller than me! I would never like an old pervert like Uzui-san!”

Pretty?

Good in sports?

Slightly taller than Zenitsu?

Tanjirou let out a short gasp before asking, “Is it Inosuke?” After saying Inosuke’s name, Zenitsu paused and stopped crying. Silence engulfed Tanjirou and he felt like he said something wrong again. He was about to say something until Zenitsu ended the call.

Tanjirou: ??? What did I do again?