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Louis packs his toothbrush last, inserting it in one of the front pockets of his bag. He sighs, it’s not that he doesn’t want to go but he really doesn’t want to go. Harry signed them up for one of those retreat slash meditation slash vow of silence things that he never agreed to but Harry knew he could get Louis to say yes to anything as long as he ate him out long enough.
“It’s not that bad, you know.” Harry says, leaning against the door. “I can hear you sigh from a mile away.” He grins mischievously and Louis just wants to wipe the smug look of off his face but he has to finish packing for the stupid retreat. “Yes, yes it is. We won’t get to sleep in the same room probably.” Louis complains while rummaging around the room for other things he might need. It’s just for three days but he’s packing everything he can to keep himself entertained. “They said it was alphabetical order, baby.” Harry whispers, grabbing Louis’ waist and pressing his chest unto Louis’ back.
Louis tries to push him weakly but he wants to be cuddled, okay? “What if you’re roommates with another guy?” Louis whines, dragging out the word. “Liam went to one last year, he said people switch room all the time, as long as you don’t make any noise you won’t get caught.” Harry chastises him, it doesn’t work.
“Do we have to go? C’mon baby.” Louis says, looking up to Harry through his lashes. “I’ll cook for a week,” He offers, hands around Harry’s waist, drawing random patterns with his thumb. Harry snorts, “You’re shit at cooking, Lou.”
They end up going, of course they do. They’re standing in front of a small hotel-like place called “The Attestation of Silence.” It was a building owned by their university to gather small retreats and of course, yoga classes. Niall bumps into Louis he trips forward a bit, “Tommo! What are you doing here?”
“Bloody hell, Niall. The real question is what are you doing here?!” Louis teases, pulling Niall into a one-armed hug. Niall laughs loudly until a guy with a scarf on his head comes out, “Lads, it’s called Attestation of Silence for a reason.” He glares at Louis. Harry is quick to hold Louis’ hand and pressing kisses to his knuckles with a smirk on his face. Louis pouts but lets it go, he sees Niall unbothered but holding a laugh.
They’ve settled in their rooms and it turns out it’s only one person per room so they didn’t need to worry about roommates but they also couldn’t switch rooms. Louis drops his bag, on the floor, and groans into the pillow on the single bed.
He was in room 118 while Harry was in 125. It wasn’t far but it wasn’t beside Louis so it is . It was a small hallway with multiple doors, and an ugly dull green wallpaper. The walls were also paper thin and everything could be heard, even small giggles from the people that also joined the retreat. They were 35 people at most.
After giving them time to settle in their rooms, they were given pamphlets with the schedule on it. Louis didn’t bother to read it and just focused trying to make his bed comfortable to sleep alone in.
Someone knocks on his door and he doesn’t know why he’s nervous but he is. Louis opens it, only to find Harry and sighs in relief. “We have to go down, baby.” Harry says, voice deep but quiet. “I know you didn’t read the schedule, I could hear you complaining 7 doors away.” He smiles dimples out, Louis tiptoes and presses a kiss on his boy’s left cheek. “Okay, let’s go.”
They have dinner and everyone is silent, so silent it actually hurts Louis’ ears, feeling like it’s ringing. Harry holds his hand through the whole meal, feeding him a carrot from time to time. Louis glares at him, knowing Harry gets why and he just smiles back.
One of their retreat mates as their moderator liked to call it, drops their fork and creates a loud metal sound against the floor. The moderator is quick to remind them that this is the Place of Silence which Louis is quick to roll his eyes at.
They enter a big room which has seats placed in a circle, Louis and Harry sit next to each other while Niall sits across them with some of his friends. “As you can see under your seats, there are pieces of paper and a few coloring pencils.” The moderator explains, Louis looks at Harry, annoyed.
Louis grabs the materials under his chair and writes, this is fucking pre-school harry with a few angry exclamation points. “I want you to draw where you see yourself in ten years, you’re in uni now and I know most of you didn’t expect to be here, so let’s see what your future holds.” The mod clasps his hands together and proceeds to play soothing background music.
A few minutes later, some people volunteer to share, even Niall does. He draws himself with a guitar (stickdrawing, of course) on a stage with a sold-out stadium. It was meant to be a joke but he said it with so much sincerity that Louis knows there’s some kind of truth into it.
Harry shares as well, as a film major, he draws a sketch of a studio he wants to own and draws a decent camera on it, under it says Directed by Harry Styles and a small Louis on the bottom left of his paper where only he can see, few people applaud him for it.
Louis doesn’t share his drawing, not even with Harry. He doesn’t tell a single soul that he drew a family, consisting of a specific curly-haired boy and children with blue eyes. And of course, him with a lapel. He isn’t a drama major for no reason.
That night, Louis showers and writes Harry letters, three letters to be exact. One for each night they spend alone.
The next day after they have their breakfast, they head into a small garden where they have their “morning meditation” which Harry is too excited for and of course, Louis dreads. They head into the garden early while the others finish off their breakfast. Louis sits beside Harry on the bench and puts his leg on top of Harry’s, “Didn’t sleep too well last night.” Louis admits, wearing Harry’s hoodie which he demanded first thing in the morning. Harry wraps his arms around him and presses kisses unto his hair. “I wrote you these,” Louis grabs the letters he wrote and presses it unto Harry’s palm, folded lazily. “Read it? M’kay?”
Later that night, Harry heads to bed and opens the letter named “Open me first!”
harry,
hi baby :( i miss you, i can’t sleeeeep. you’re probably calling me dramatic and then you’re gonna make the “but you’re a drama major lou!” joke but i really can’t sleep. this is all your fault, after this, you’re gonna fuck me till i see stars then we’re gonna cuddle until i complain.
anyway, the activity today kinda made me think. i know after uni you’re gonna pursue film and want your own studio, but what happens to us? what’s the ideal age for marriage anyway? and should we have two separate rings for engagement and the wedding itself? maybe we should buy those interlocking ones lol (yea the ones you always see on pinterest)
goodnight now baby, i love you so much.
your lou xxxx
Harry rereads it a few times, a smile unmistaken on his face. They’ve talked about the future many times, but it’s the first time Louis isn’t shy to open up about it. He leaves the two letters on the bed and heads to the door.
The door creaks but not loud enough to disturb anyone. He walks slowly, careful to not make any noise. He feels like a teenager escaping to see his secret boyfriend. He sees 118 and opens the door.
“Harry,” Louis whisper-shouts and immediately wraps his legs unto the taller boy’s waist. He kisses Louis, sucking his bottom lip. His hands squeezing Louis’ arse. He stifles a moan, he drops Louis on the single bed and the bed creaks loudly. “Shit.” Harry mutters, they still for a moment, to see if they got caught. Luckily, they hear nothing and proceed to giggle quietly. “We won’t fit here baby.”
“Yes, we will.” Harry squeezes himself beside Louis, “I’ll cuddle you the whole night.”
Louis punches him weakly, eyes already closed. “You better.” Louis nuzzles his face unto the crook of Harry’s neck. “I love you.” Louis whispers.
Harry rubs Louis’ back slowly, “I love you.” He whispers back.
The next morning, they do the morning meditation again, which just consists of them stretching repeatedly while saying the words, “Good energy in, bad energy away.” To which Louis and Niall mock for the rest of the day.
The day passes out as a blur, there’s more sharing, more writing, more drawing.
Harry lays on his own bed that night, opening the second letter, they’re leaving tomorrow morning anyway.
did you cheat? are you reading this right after the first one?
you better not be!!!!!
i just want u to know, i miss your cooking >:( their food sucks and i want to be woken up with a hand job and pancakes with chocolate chips. and yes you’re doing that after this retreat thing
you know how in arranged marriages (or something) they sleep in different bedrooms then get married in the morning? that’s how i feel but except tomorrow we’re still not sleeping in the same bed OR getting married so maybe that’s not what i wanna say
i’m not a morning person and even the queen knows that but harry if i get to see your frog face every time i open my eyes, maybe it doesn’t seem so bad. even if you snore and get your curly hair everywhere. i still want to kiss your sweaty back and your tattoos
is it wrong that i wanna spend the rest of my life with you? do you feel the same?
i love you baby
your baby xxx
Harry doesn’t get much sleep that night, too giddy to be in his boy’s arms again.
“How dare you question if I wanna spend the rest of my life with you, of course I do.” Harry says the moment he sees Louis, dressed in one of the hoodies he stole from Harry. Bag on his shoulder, all ready to go home.
Louis hugs him, “Shut up, sap.” He doesn’t look up, still hugging Harry. “And the third one?” He asks.
“Oh, I haven’t read it yet.” Harry says, “No seriously, tell me.”
“I haven’t read it, love.” Harry frowns, getting the letter from his pocket. “Why?” Louis looks at the letter and shoves it back in his pocket. “Don’t read it here!”
Harry grabs Louis’ jaw, forcing their eyes to meet. “What’s in it?”
“You’ll know later, let’s go somewhere fancy.”
They do end up going somewhere fancy, it’s a small place with a garden as their seating area. There’s not much people considering it’s Thursday night. Louis is sweating despite the cold night but Harry doesn’t question it.
He reaches for Louis’ hand under the table, “Okay, can I read it now? You’ve been jumpy for the past 20 minutes and it’s killing me.” Louis nods.
Harry brings out the paper, written on it open last. He sees the drawing Louis did on their first day on the retreat, it’s not the next Leonardo Da Vinci but Harry knows what it is. Harry gets emotional and breathes out slowly, he’s so in love with this boy.
Harry sees there’s something written below the drawing
we should get married :o
He looks up to Louis so fast, he swears his neck snaps. Louis is holding out a fist to him, Harry looks at him confusedly, “What’s this?” Harry also holds his fist up, “Brofist…..?” He touches their fists together.
“No,” Louis laughs, “You idiot.” He grabs Harry’s hand and pressed a silver ring with green and blue stones on his palm. Harry gasps, and covers his face, ring left on the table.
“Louis, no.”
Louis’ heart stops, “I mean yes, I’ll fucking marry you but I wanted to propose!” Harry clarifies, already handing his left hand out so Louis can put the ring on. “I fucking hate you, Styles. Thought you were rejecting me, you know my ego can’t handle that.”
Harry kisses Louis. “Not gonna be Styles anymore, like, soon. Have you seen the ring on my finger?” Harry jokes even if his cheeks are blotchy and tear-streamed.
“Oh my god shut up and keep kissing me.”