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Chapter Text

Sakura fiddles with the hem of her red cheongsam as she stares wide-eyed at the dog sitting in front of her.

Ninken, her mind supplies immediately recalling the needed memories, Kakashi-sensei called this one Pakkun last time.

She gulps, feeling uncomfortable with the awkward silence hanging in the air. Since she was a little kid, she's never really been good at confronting people, always too polite and shy to go out of her comfort zone. It's obviously turning into a problem now, one which she has to resolve as soon as possible, or Tsunade-sama might have her head further down her apprenticeship.

"If you want to be a medic-nin, then you must confront people—no second-guesses and takebacks."

Ironically, exactly those words of advice are the reason she's in this awkward predicament in the first place. Since Naruto's departure and the beginning of her tutelage under the Godaime Hokage, Sakura's been conflicted about the other remaining member of Team Seven. Hatake Kakashi has never really been invested in her training as he has been in the boys' training regime but even if that left a bitter taste in her mouth, she couldn't blame him. It's not like she herself has been any more invested in her own training.

("Sasuke-kun! Don't you like my hair? It's gotten really long.")

She scoffs at that memory and shakes her head.

Despite all that, he was still her teacher and she does hold a great deal of respect for him, she still feels bitter—so Sakura decided to track him down and ask him if he plans to dissolve Team 7 just like that without bidding her goodbye. She might not be his favorite student or that likable in his opinion but a goodbye shouldn't be too much, right? Even Sasuke had said his farewells and she knows she’s built an undeniable distance between them through her childish and rude behavior.

She eventually manages to get his address from Gai-sensei when she stumbles upon Tenten in the midst of her search and after she arrives, the ninken greet her at the door, almost as if they are expecting her appearance.

"Um… is Kakashi-sensei available?"

Pakkun sighs.

"He isn't at home right now, pup."

There's a faint trace of familiar chakra in the apartment, no residue or anything, she loses track of it the second she feels it.

Ah, she thinks to herself, that's a clear sign, isn't it?

"Then… do inform him please that I dropped by… and that I'll stop by another time."

She probably won't.

The dog nods at her and she waves her hand before turning around. Tsunade-shishou is probably waiting for her.

It takes her one step to understand it. Haruno Sakura walks up the tree without any problems, as if it was as easy as breathing.

She looks at her teacher and he's staring at the boys.

She wonders—would he have paid her any attention if she was better, more focused?

"Kame, report."

Sakura blinks, confused before recognition fills her. Taking in the familiar chakra signature, she side-steps to let an Anbu through. The one with the turtle mask nods at her, a quick and short sign of gratitude before he leaves the tower, his cloak fluttering behind him. She hums, curiosity building up as she walks the stairs up to her master's office for her daily lessons.

Anbu are everywhere in Konoha and that's common knowledge. Also logical, really. They keep a lookout for their surroundings and report unusual sightings or help anyone in trouble whilst rotating their positions every few hours. 

It's not all that strange to see Anbu in and about the village, helping civilians with carrying heavy bags or bringing lost children back home—well, the more social ones at least. Those are also the ones whose chakra signatures Sakura usually could recognize. It's also not that strange to feel watched sometimes, a quick glance at the back of one's head. When Sakura manages to locate one of the more sociable ones, though, they make their presence known through spiking their chakra before their presence becomes invisible again. It's more of a reassurance, after all, all shinobi are paranoid.

So, yes, Anbu are not uncommon. That said, their presence was more or less unimportant to Sakura until she became Tsunade's apprentice. As the Hokage, Anbu flank around her, in view or out of view, always making sure her safety is secure. The daunting realization for Sakura is that she's now constantly being watched when in Tsunade's presence. Every single mistake she makes in a lesson, every time Tsunade absolutely floors the ground with her—it's all under observation. The more logical part of her understands, that those people could care less about her or her progress. The insecure part though bears the shame on her back and prays that she'll improve as soon as possible.

It's why the feeling of awkwardness settles in the pit of her stomach when she stumbles upon Kame. He's one of the Anbu members who spend a lot of time watching over the Hokage. It's also why his chakra signature is so familiar. On a few rare occasions, he made himself known through spiking his chakra and Sakura's keen memory only needed one instance to save it in the archive of her mind, forever engraved in there.

Besides, it's not the first time she's come across Kame. For some reason, he exited the tower by simply waking it down when he lacked a task. She's also seen him in the market streets near her parents' house helping civilians with some tasks. It's difficult to forget his chakra signature too—scorched wood with hints of spices.

She has yet to find out who the shinobi behind the turtle mask is, although it's not for a lack of curiosity from her side or trying. It certainly wouldn't be the first time, considering she knows a few Anbu without their mask simply by deduction and remembering their chakra signature. Of course, she has never walked up to one of them and revealed her knowledge (and she sure as hell isn't planning to do so anytime soon). Her finding out wouldn't count as treason (whilst Anbu are sworn to secrecy about their identity, those rules do not extend to people who find out by chance) but it surely wouldn't be taken with appreciation and would probably be considered as sniffling into a business she shouldn't due to the amount of Anbu whose identity she's deduced at this point. Which might get her into trouble and Sakura wants to avoid that.

Well, she is sniffling into a business she shouldn't, after all.

Kame is a bit difficult to track down in the village and despite being one of Tsunade's more common guards, he's gone a lot of times, indicating he's probably highly requested and sent on missions as shinobi. Now, that leaves the question as to what exactly could require his services that much.

Shaking her head gently, Sakura opens the door to her mentor's office and ignores her budding curiosity about the Anbu. It has become a little game to her at this point. Probably because it's so ridiculously easy to actually find out. A swear on secrecy and porcelain masks seemed to be the only true obstacle to stop people from finding out. And maybe, also the fact that most people don't want to know and don't like anything associated with Anbu—which is slightly confusing to her but she pushes it back with a simple; ”Maybe I'll get it when I have some more experience." For the moment, that is.

(Later, Sakura learns to understand that finding out highly-trained shinobi's true identities really shouldn't be a task considered as a "simple game".)

Tsunade lies the files down with a tired sigh.

“Shizune,” she mutters, leaning back into her chair, “bring me some sake.”

Genin Haruno Sakura was able to effectively break out of Genin Yamanaka Ino’s shintenshin.

“Tsunade-sama? Is something wrong?”

She groans burying her hands in her face.

“Where’s the damn sake?!”

Yamanaka Inochi requests an examination.

What a troublesome apprentice she has found herself.

Chapter Text

Tsunade is the one to tell her about Team Seven’s official disbandment.

It doesn’t come as a surprise, not after her last visit to her teacher’s— former teacher’s—apartment. The bitterness continues to swell in the depths of her stomach but she bites her lips and balls her fists—she knew this was coming. It’s the only logical option with Naruto gone and the insignia on Sasuke’s headband scratched through. Team Seven is no more.

Team Seven is no more.

Tsunade, the Godaime Hokage, delivers the information in a neutral tone, eyes glinting like steel. She has no remorse for the faith of a team that was meant to fall apart the moment it was created. How could it not? With the last Uchiha and the village’s most hated kid (and it still tears at her, that one time Naruto flinched when he walked through the civilian district with her) paired on one team, nothing in between their clashing ideals but an inexperienced genin and a man that should never have been a teacher, not under these circumstances. So, she breaks said girl (the only one remaining, chopped pink hair, and curious green eyes) with the orders she believes in.

But.

Tsunade, the mentor of said little girl, softens her gaze mere seconds after and sighs, her heart aching for everything that went wrong with the cursed number seven. Under the gazes of the people watching her back and the little girl in front of her, she smiles, sour but warm and strong .

“This is a new beginning, Sakura,” she speaks, voice firm, “not an ending.”

Under a vast blue sky on a Thursday, Team Seven ceases to exist quietly and yet, hauntingly. 

Who will remember it?

Who?

“Sakura,” Shikamaru drawls lazily, staring at the shogi board in between them, "it's been a while."

Back in the academy, Sakura had never had many interactions with the boy sitting opposite her. Maybe as kids, considering their matching quiet nature and preference for intellectual thinking, but by the time she had cut ties with Ino, he was gone from her life too. It didn't bother her as much as it probably should have back then—she had other issues to concern herself with (and surprisingly not all of them had to do with Sasuke).

Honestly, she didn't expect to start talking to Shikamaru again after rekindling her friendship with Ino, but maybe she should have had her suspicions. Team 10 was everything Team 7 could never have been; close-knit as a family, flowing together perfectly. A puzzle with pieces that perfectly fit together.

(She thinks of blue eyes resembling the sky and black hair the color of ash—and ashes of a broken bond he left behind, that's for sure.)

Thus Ino, wanting to kill two birds with one stone (1. spending time with Sakura and 2. spending time with her team), decided to drag Sakura along to some of her daily meetings with Team Ten. 

As uncomfortable and anxious as she was about tagging along, Ino left her no choice, firm with her decision to have Sakura interact with her friends. Naturally, one thing led to another, and suddenly she had begun weekly shogi matches with Shikamaru.

"Sure has," she mumbles in reply, looking at the board with a contemplative gaze before sighing, "I'm losing, aren't I?"

Though recently, thanks to her training under Tsunade, she's been unable to attend a few meet-ups.

"Yep." He leans back on his arms and stares up at the sky, eyes following the movement of the slowly drifting clouds. "Ino is worried."

Ah. That makes sense.

He blinks before he looks at her, a calculative glint in his orbs.

"You've been very busy recently." Busier than you should be.

Sakura scoffs. She's not sure what she finds more amusing—Ino setting her up with Shikamaru so he could quietly interrogate her about her suspiciously large workload or Shikamaru outright giving the whole thing away.

She shakes her head softly and grants the other a small grin.

Since he's been honest with her, she'll pay him back as a sign of appreciation—she's a very polite person after all.

"I've been requesting more training and work shifts at the hospital," she admits and observes as confusion settles in his eyes for a single moment before it's already gone.

He raises an eyebrow. Why?

She halts for a moment. Sakura, of course, knows why. The answer lies at the tip of her tongue, carefully constructed word by word but—she can't bring herself to say it, to speak it out in existence. Seconds pass and she sighs.

"Team Seven."

The lie tastes sour on her tongue but she knows he won't question it.

Recently, no one dares to approach the topic of her former team with Sakura. Not that she can blame them considering she doesn't quite like to talk about the catastrophe that was her former team.

Of course, he knows that's not the answer but the probably most irritating thing about Shikamaru is that he always seems to gather a lot of information and yet rarely acts on all of it. Sakura doesn't blame him though. Due to her shy and self-conscious nature, she holds back a lot as well. Though recently that's starting to change as well and she seems to do exactly the opposite of him more often—act on her knowledge. She can't pinpoint when she started to be a bit more confident, but she's sure it's because of Team Seven's absence and her training under Tsunade.

"Troublesome," he mutters, showing her which turn brought upon her loss on the board.

He agreed to not telling Ino about her little lie with his actions and she couldn't feel more grateful.

Even if Ino told him to do something about Sakura's questionable mood, there's not much he could do against the jarring absence of her former team anyway.

Just as there's nothing he could do against the true reason behind her desire for a larger workload.

Then he grins at her as they hear Chouji and Ino get back with the snacks.

“Another round?”

Sakura thinks she’ll be just fine for a little bit longer.

Except there are top secrets hidden for the village's safety, by all means, nothing gets past Konoha’s rumor-mill. Knowledge travels throughout many mouths, so if one has a good network they’ll gain a lot of useful information. That’s the first form of gossip coursing Konoha’s streets. It's hushed and not easy to obtain but usually worth it.

Then there’s the second form of gossip which is loud and absolutely everyone hears about it even if they don’t want to know about it. 

The knowledge of her team’s disbandment sadly belongs to the latter category.

It's not like Sakura didn't anticipate it. Team 7, after all, has always been the talk of the folks' gossip. With Konoha's Jinchuriki, the sole survivor (minus the murderer, of course) of the Uchiha massacre and the famous Copy Ninja Hatake Kakashi, there was much to say.

(Later, through the mentioned rumor-mill, she learns of Kakashi's other infamous title, Nakamagoroshi no Kakashi.

Friend-Killer Kakashi.

That day she recalls all the times she has spotted him at the memorial and craves every single time into her memory.

Then she starts to question the accuracy of that title.)

So, yes, her former team has always and probably will always be the center of the village's gossip. She's gotten used to the people pointing at her teammates and the hushed whispers following them everywhere.

Now, though, people point at her.

She's the only one left behind, they say, what a poor girl.

Sakura stumbles upon variations of those words everywhere and it's starting to irritate her but she refuses to embarrass Tsunade by letting her temper take the reins, so she bites her tongue until it draws blood and walks on. One day, she'll grab those words right out of their hands and shatter them. One day.

She does, however, also stumble upon Aburame Shino. Back in the academy, she sat frequently beside him. Mostly because she couldn't snatch the seat beside Sasuke.

Partially, because she was one of the few people who didn't mind the bugs and his whole silent nature—in fact, she quite appreciated the silence. It's one of the reasons she never practically liked Naruto, considering he's always been a bit too loud.

Sakura winces.

Though now, she realizes that she has been loud and rude too, especially with her fangirling.

Naruto deserved better than that.

"Shino," she greets him, letting a small smile onto her face, "didn't expect to see you here."

They are currently in front of Konoha's hospital. Her shift only starts in an hour but there's something else she needs to do at the hospital. 

Still, it's surprising to see her former classmate there. Whilst the members of the Aburame clan do as well have frequent check-ups or need healing, that's rarely the case. Shizune told her at the beginning of her training at the hospital that the Aburame's clan technique does interfere with healing done by medical chakra to some extent. It's not impossible but it's certainly uncomfortable at least, therefore they tend to avoid healing sessions whenever they can.

"Since they tend to keep their distance from outright directly fighting their foes, they don't get many injuries anyway."

"Sakura-san, it appears I've arrived at a suitable time," he mutters nodding at her, "why? Because I wish to sign up for the medical ninjutsu training program."

She blinks, her eyes widening a little in surprise. That's something she certainly had not expected.

Noting her surprise, he decides to quell her curiosity and explain. 

"My goal is to be able to use my kikaichu for remote healing."

Sakura grins at him. "Something akin to Tsunade-shishou's slug summons, huh."

At his nod, she shakes her head gently.

"Well, I won't be much help. I'm still only a trainee, so I can't sign you up or anything."

Right as he opens his mouth to reply, in a feat of boldness, she grabs his arm.

"That said, even if I can't help you, I'm sure Shizune can."

And then promptly drags him in.

(Sakura remembers the boy sitting beside her who would quietly watch the insects crawl on his desk whilst every break, without failure.)

Yes, this might work out just more than fine.

After dropping Shino at Shizune's office, she walks the hallways towards a certain room.

On her way there, she encounters Kame.

It's not that unusual to see Anbu in the hospital. There's a whole section dedicated to them. That section is, of course, meant to help keep their identity secret, and not every nurse can just waltz into there. Every Anbu has one assigned nurse, in rare cases two—that's to prevent nurses from knowing a lot of Anbu's identities at once (of course even that rule is discarded in life-threatening situations). All nurses are sworn to secrecy as well and need to overgo some evaluations to gain the clearance to work in that sector—Sakura suspects that some of them are probably Anbu themselves.

Despite all that, she's rarely seen Kame in the hospital. She recalls having seen his mask exactly once before in the hospital. It was back when she started her training and she's pretty sure he wasn't there for himself.

Sakura expects him to walk on and ignore her. There's no reason for him to address her. They have never talked with each other before. Sakura rarely has to speak with anyone of Tsunade's guards, after all. Yet, he halts anyway and although the mask hides his eyes, she can feel his gaze.

"Haruno-san," he speaks and his voice sounds a bit stiff but mostly… childish? Young? She's unsure of the right word. "Could you lead me to Shizune's office?"

She notes the familiar way he addressed Shizune before she blinks. That's the whole way back. Turning her head, she glances at the door of room 106. The hospital is large. If she walks back there, she won't have enough time to get back to room 106 and then to the ward she's stationed at. Plus, she always needs some time for herself after visiting room 106 with patient number 327.

He catches her hesitance and shakes his head. "It's ok I'll ask someone else to accompany m—"

If he's considering asking someone else to lead him there instead of simply asking for directions, that must mean he can't go alone for some reason.

"It's ok, Kame-san. I can show you to Shizune's office."

She smiles at him politely and he nods his head.

"Thanks."

As they walk there, her curiosity gets the best of her and she musters all her courage up.

"Is there a reason you didn't simply ask for directions, Kame-san?"

Seconds of silence pass and she wishes to take her words back but then—

"I'm not good with directions," he answers, "plus the staff here don’t like Anbu wandering around the place without a nurse."

A trainee usually doesn't pry , is what he doesn't say, Sakura figures.

Ferocious. She realizes startled, a grin forming on her face. That's how he sounds.

It's a bit different from the usual Anbu and Sakura is curious.

"… What were you planning to do before accompanying me?"

She wonders if he's trying to converse for his own sake or her sake.

"I was planning to visit patient number 327," she answers truthfully.

She can see the door of Shizune's office.

"Patient 327?"

She tilts her head at his curious tune.

"My mother," she answers and for one millisecond, she sees him stop in his place. 

She doesn't think an Anbu is supposed to act like that.

"She's been here since Suna's invasion," Sakura tells him as they arrive in front of Shizune's office.

He grabs the door's handle but tilts his head so that she's in his view range.

"I wish her a good recovery."

"Thank you," is what she says as he walks in.

I hope she doesn't, is what she continues to keep to herself.

Chapter Text

"That's enough for today, Sakura-chan."

She blinks, staring up from all the papers on her desk and glances over towards Shizune. She's been filling out some general datasheets, about a few of the patients,  and entering them into the system for further identification. It's boring work but also easily done, considering her aptitude to organizing and keeping track of information. She properly developed that skill in the academy for her study overviews and it's certainly not letting her down now. Sighing, she picks up the papers and pushes them against the table before filing them away for her next shift at the hospital. 

Shizune walks closer with a warm smile and Sakura remembers her conversation with her former seatmate.

"Shino," she speaks up, a curious tilt to hear a voice, "Did it go well?"

The Hokage’s assistant nods. "I've invited him for lessons tomorrow."

Sakura immediately picks up the way the answer is phrased. "Invited… are you going to personally teach him?"

"He showed an interest in poisons specifically."

Probably due to his kikaichu, if she had to guess.

A grin forms on her face. "That's nice. Will I see him then?"

Something about Shizune's expression following that question builds an uneasy feeling in Sakura.

"Unfortunately not. There's… there's something Tsunade-sama wants you to do." At her curious glance, Shizune shakes her head gently. "She'll tell you tomorrow."

Sakura nods in reply, albeit a bit confused before she stands up from her seat to stretch out her limbs. It's been a long day. Tiredly, she looks up at the clock and then halts mid-movement. Long workdays tend to mess with the mind but Sakura is sure that she's not seeing the time wrong.

"Shizune-senpai…," she trails off, trying to process the time. Then she blinks and determination fills her gaze. "You're letting me out too early. My shift ends at 1800 hours, it's only 1725."

The older woman steps closer, something warm in her gaze.

"Kame told me you've helped him find my office instead of visiting your mother today." She picks up a few pens from the table and puts them away. "Visiting hours end at 1800, after all."

And Sakura blinks, gulping, trying to calm her breath as she presses her nails against her hands. She meant well. Suddenly, the whole room feels warmer as if they are in the midst of a damn volcano. Kame meant well.

"Sakura-chan?"

At the other's confused gaze, she looks up trying to will the tears prickling at the corners of her eyes away but failing miserably. "T-Thank… you."

She must be lucky because Shizune mistakes her uncomfortable panic as immense gratitude.

"Ah, Sakura-chan," she says, patting her head (and it feels as if she's trying to scorch her skin off), "that's no reason to cry. I'm sure your mother will be glad to see you."

Sure, she will, a voice scoffs in her mind, she will be so damn glad.

Sakura tries to push these thoughts away to no avail. 

They meant well.

Her fiddling around is starting to seem concerning because Shizune's smile slowly drops from her face being replaced by worry instead.

"Sakura-chan… is something wrong?"

All alarm bells in her brain start to ring and Sakura blinks a few times, lifting her head to properly stare at Shizune. She can't find out. She needs an explanation for her odd behavior—and she just has the thing.

"I'm… just very confused and tired," she explains, grabbing onto her clothes and glancing at the ground, "Okaa-san is still at the hospital, and O… Otou-san is… gone now…"

"Sakura-chan…"

Shizune steps closer to lay a hand on her shoulder.

"Everything will be fine."

She is not the best actor or liar out there, but if her whole household situation has given her anything, then it's the fact she knows how to spin convincing lies and elaborate made-up stories, along with which tells, movements and expressions to twist around, so she could at least fool people that didn't know her too well. For example, lies are best mixed with honesty to craft them convincing, and that's exactly what Sakura is doing in this situation.

She's been confused and tired the past week, and whilst they are not the only reason, her father's death and her mother's hospitalization are a part of the reason.

It's not the fact that her father is dead itself. It's that her father is dead.

Not once did Sakura mourn his death in the past weeks and she doesn't plan to do so anytime soon. All memories he left her with were of slaps and bitter smiles, words preached in a dripping cold tone and eyes that didn't glance at her except to convey disgust and disappointment.

And yet.

She thinks about rare, warm smiles and forehead kisses.

Something in her chest just clenches and it feels too difficult to breathe.

Her father was so cold towards her and not in the way Sasuke was either.

Sakura doesn't know how to mourn for someone who's been so detached from her life to the point all she remembers of him is the stinging pain and the calm words of threats.

(People tell her that Sasuke's cold and an asshole. She agrees and disagrees with them. He's cold but there's warmth. Or maybe there isn't anymore.)

But her father also seemed invincible to her, no matter how much her mind told her he wasn't. He never advanced past the rank of Genin, instead dropping his mild shinobi career for a job as a teacher at a civilian school. He had a few good friends, got no complaints from his workplace or anyone at the village. Her parents also were enamored with each other.

He was in other words, an average civilian in the system, someone to overlook.

Maybe that's why no one, civilian or shinobi, seemed to notice the way his eyes would narrow at her, or tell her of, nor the way he'd hit her until blue and purple flowers decorated her skin (and they were easily hidden behind gear, concealer, and bandages). His words were spitting poison and a sharp knife.

He always roomed over her, with a straight spine and a gaze that screamed strength.

And now he's dead and there aren't any hits or cuts anymore, no more broken plates for her to pick up or harsh words to ignore and forget. She's at peace at that terrible house for once.

But soon her mother is coming back from the hospital.

She suffered through some injuries and later developed a fever which forced her to stay overdue and Sakura never felt more relieved than when getting the news.

Of course, she visited her mother daily, partially to avoid people getting suspicious and partially due to being concerned about her. The visits were always suffocating and unpleasant because that's just how her mother was, but Sakura pulled through it and did her best to stay calm and do nothing rash. But she was concerned about her mother anyway because that woman did raise her, albeit not really motivated or in a kind way—yet Sakura is still alive and breathing without too many injuries. Unlike her father, her mother rarely raised her hand against Sakura.

("That'd be doing you a favor," Mebuki muttered, "considering you want to be a kunoichi.")

There was also the fact that any visible wounds would raise alarm from others. That's why her father made sure she knew how to hide wounds and hit her mostly in covered body parts.

Her mother was very demanding, though. She gave her clothes and forbade her from wearing anything but them so that Sakura would look like a proper lady. At first, it didn't bother her. The clothes were pretty and she wanted to impress Sasuke with her appearance. Until after the first few D-ranks that is, she realized how inconvenient they were but her mother had slapped her once and Sakura shut up about it.

Food was another whole story. She did start the diet because Ino did so but her mother took it way further than she should have. Ino was from a clan with both parents being skilled shinobi. Her diet was created with that in mind. It was still not ideal to have one but if done properly the damage stayed small. They most likely anticipated that Ino would come to the realization that as a shinobi, diets were not necessarily needed. At least not always, and especially not when you're a growing child.

Sakura's mother heard "diet" and understood "saving costs on food". Whatever giddiness Sakura had for the diet vanished very soon but her mother wouldn't accept her protests.

(The disappointment in Kakashi's eyes after he told her to reconsider dieting and realized she didn't, haunts her sometimes, reminding Sakura of her father.)

And no matter what she did, her mother seemed to find joy in directing Sakura's life.

So, she thought about leaving the house. Genin are considered adults in the law's eyes, after all. There is a bit of scoff at seeing kids leave their parents’ house early on, considering the dangers of their jobs, but ultimately no one cares too much.

Finding somewhere else to live though, that's where all her problems lie. She doesn't have many friends and even then, asking to stay with them would lead to questions being asked. Rattling her parents out would not end well for her.

She can't rent lodging either because she just didn't have the money, as D-ranks don't pay well, and her mother would have her head for starting a job. Not that any civilian establishment would offer her a job considering her age and already gained occupation as shinobi.

Sleeping on the streets is a bad idea and her mother wouldn't stand for it, since it would affect her image as well.

Essentially, Sakura's stuck with her mother for only God knows how long.

Visiting her mother didn't end peacefully.

At first, Sakura considered just going home instead of willingly sitting through Mebuki's seamless complaints about everything from her hospital stay to the weather outside. That didn't work though. Shizune would have known if she didn't visit. Sakura didn't want to misuse the other's kindness, so she bit her lips and pulled through the visit.

It was terrible.

Haruno Mebuki has always been more caring than Haruno Kizashi. She was suffocating and harsh with her attitude but she'd think about Sakura.

(Sakura tries to ignore the doubtful voice in her head, telling her that it's all wrong anyway, filled with useless excuses.)

After Kizashi's death though, a part of her must have snapped.

She'd hold her daughter's shoulders and let her nails dig into the skin, harsh words would turn into spitting poison, and her gaze would turn as cold and dismissive as possible.

It's starting to wear Sakura down a bit. There's nothing she can do, so instead, she thinks about how her mother will probably calm down once a few months pass by. Grief and rage can turn one harsher than they should be, but it's not always permanently.

Sakura left the hospital, tears at the corner of her eyes and bitterness sweeping into her. Recently, nothing seemed to work properly anymore.

The next day around 1100 hours, Sakura is in and about the village. Her appointment with Tsunade isn't until 1600 and she doesn't have hospital shifts on Tuesdays and Saturdays (that would change later on though, once she'd start on proper medical ninjutsu healing). 

Wandering around, she's not sure what exactly to do. Maybe she should buy some sweets? There's no one to stop her and she has no idea what hell training Tsunade might put her through later.

A bit more cheerful than before, she walks towards her favorite dango stall, when she halts abruptly, blinking at the feeling.

That chakra signature.

She knows it.

It's concealed, muted to an extent but not fully. Yet, she can feel it faintly, recognizing its quirks.

Scorched wood with a hint of spices.

Kame!

Before she can properly think it through, her feet move towards the main street and she finds herself nearing a small bar. 

Sakura frowns, narrowing her eyes. She can't go in. They'd kick her out immediately.

Of course, as a Genin you're considered an adult. That's why other villages (except the civilian districts) let minors into their bars as long as they have proper identification proving they are a shinobi (although a lot don't even ask for that nowadays). If there's a chance you might be killed in action the next day, then who is going to stop you from enjoying a drink? God?

Konoha is different though, people assume it's partially due to being the nice village but as Tsunade's apprentice, Sakura knows it's because of health reasons.

Of course, in good fun, Tsunade has tried to get her to drink—but it's mostly jokingly and at some point in their career, med-nins learn how to reverse the effects of alcohol.

Yet, that doesn't mean the health risks vanish, especially if you're a minor.

("12-year-old twerps drinking? With their underdeveloped bodies? That's a fucking joke, kid. You never know when they die, they say but what if all the alcohol is the reason that gets them killed? Being a shinobi doesn't excuse stupidity.")

Sakura thinks there's a lot to say about Tsunade being the one to utter these words.

Just as she wants to turn around and walk away, the door opens and a few Anbu step out, all with their hoods up as well.

Sakura freezes.

How didn't she notice? Was it due to being so preoccupied with Kame's chakra signature that she didn't register any of the others?

He always had a rather weird feel to his chakra signature.

Wheat and Wisteria.

She looks up and faces one of the Anbu, who averts his eyes upon meeting hers before she feels the second gaze directed at her.

Kame is glancing at her.

Then to her complete surprise, he nods to the others, signaling them to wait, and walks closer to her, coming to a halt before her.

"Haruno-san," he greets her, and his voice sounds oddly relaxed, "thank you for yesterday."

Her eyes widen in surprise, as a red blush covers her cheeks. Taking a hold of her emotions, she calms down seconds later before slightly narrowing her eyes at him.

There's absolutely no reason for him to approach her.

"... It was no problem," she replies, trying to keep her tone as polite as possible. Thanks to his mask, she's unsure if she managed to do so though.

"Is there anything else you need or…?"

She asks him after seconds of silence pass.

Haruno Sakura.

The Godaime's apprentice. 

With an odd coloring consisting of green eyes and bright pink hair, resembling candy floss. 

Shizune only speaks fondly of her, labeling the kid as a responsible and kind girl.

Sakura's also a former member of the village's well-known disaster team, Team 7.

Essentially, she's known around the village. People spread rumors about her often and the hospital staff praises her diligent work.

With her former team and current apprenticeship, that alone shouldn't be strange.

It's just that often, Tsunade would send an Anbu to pick the girl up if there were any changes made to their training regime. 

And most times it would be him, no doubt due to his social and easy-going nature.

That in itself wouldn't be a problem or anything concerning.

It only started to get weird when he tracked her down to the library, finding her hunched over a few scrolls about chakra control and chakra signatures. Her spending her free time learning seemed normal, considering she was the Hokage's apprentice.

It's just that his gut told him that something was off—and he couldn't just really ignore a gut feeling. It kept him alive a few times on the battlefield.

But what really got him stunned, was when she looked up from the scrolls and politely greeted him.

He didn't make any noise when moving and he didn't approach her, still at the entry. With his chakra masked.

There is something off about Haruno Sakura.

Otherwise, though, there aren't many strange things about her and nothing else has happened. She looked a bit put off at the hospital the day before but that's probably because she couldn't visit her mother thanks to him.

He grimaces at that piece of memory.

"Is there anything else you need or… ?"

He can feel the gazes of the others on his back and sighs.

Nothing else happened until they stepped out of the bar and the girl looked directly at Inu.

Inu, or also known as Hatake Kakashi, her former teacher.

Knowing Hatake, the man definitely didn't tell her about his status as Anbu.

Yet there was recognition in her eyes upon seeing him.

He shakes his head at her.

"Just wanted to thank you once again."

The girl blinked and then—

"Anbu don't talk with people unless absolutely necessary."

That's… true? It happens here and there but they get advised against speaking too much, or at least not without the use of chakra to alter their voice a bit.

"Plus you already thanked me yesterday. There's something else you want, or you would have never approached me without reason."

Then she tilts her head, eyes sparkling with curiosity and he feels as if he isn't staring at a simple 12-year-old kid, nor the clumsy but hard-working apprentice of the Godaime.

"But I'm a Genin, so there's nothing of value you could need from me… except for information maybe?"

She looked up at him once again with narrowed eyes and he realizes that just because Ebisu keeps talking about that pink-haired brat that's visiting the library almost daily and just because Shizune affectionately talks about Tsunade's hard-working and responsible charge, that it doesn't mean that's all there to her.

Has Kakashi ever talked about her? It seems surreal that he didn't, considering there's an unsettling glint in her eyes which he cannot identify. 

"Kame-san, what exactly do you want?"

To know what you're up to.

Because there must be something she's doing or otherwise her eyes wouldn't look like that.

She knows that it's stupid to not play along and pretend that Kame doesn't want anything. She's curious though and hopes that maybe, just maybe, he'll stumble a bit and she finds out clues to his identity.

Disappointingly, he shakes his head again.

"Maybe another time," he says before he pauses and she can feel the grin behind his mask, "make sure to be on time for your appointment with Tsunade-sama this time. Wouldn't want to take after your old teacher now, or?"

Then he turns around to go back to his teammates, and shinobi instincts be damned, she hopes he trips over a rock and falls.

Dejectedly, she walks towards her favorite stall, wishing for some dango to cheer her up. She'll find out his identity another day.

Except life has a funny way of working and Kame hasn't anticipated just how much his next move is going to backfire on him.

At 1300 hours, Haruno Sakura walks into the library and abruptly stops. 

Scorched wood with a hint of spices.

At the reception sits a man with messy brown hair bound together by a blue bandana and a senbon sticking out his mouth.

Sakura blinks.

"Eh," he mutters lazily, "aren't you the Godaime's apprentice?"

That man is behind the turtle mask?

Chapter Text

"Hey, now," Genma greets her, his trademark grin resting comfortably on his face, "didn't think you'd be in such a rush to see me."

Sakura holsters herself up on her arms, groaning at the slight ache coming from her elbows. Then she looks up from her position at the ground to the man before her and hisses at him, resulting in him grinning even wider. Definitely not a good idea to ram against the door, head-on, without hesitation. 

"Better save that energy for your training with Tsunade-sama and get up from the floor, kid, " he tells her, leaning against the counter behind him, "I don't like cleaning up pink-haired brats from the ground."

She scoffs at him, irritation building up in her and—"The only cleaning the library needs is a staff change."—immediately afterward she freezes in the midst of her movements, biting on her lips as she stares at the ground.

And then whips her head up, astounded by the chuckles coming from the other.

"Getting feisty, huh," he replies, a teasing tilt in his voice, "now get up and go drown yourself in all your 30 scrolls for—What do you call it again? A light reading?"

A blush covers her face, she finally stands up, mutters her identification data, and walks towards the shelves.

Two weeks after seeing Kame for the first time in the library, Sakura can say with a bit of confidence that she's gathered a) enough information about his identity to know who Kame is behind his mask and b) enough familiarity with the Anbu to know who Shiranui Genma is.

To no one's exact surprise, the moment she matched up Kame's chakra signature with one of the strangers that suddenly worked at the library, Sakura had troubles finding out who the hell he was. She'd never seen the senbon-wielding shinobi before, or anyone past the rank of Chunin that is—and exactly that line of thought tipped her off to the proctor of the last stage. 

She had a name but still lacked information about him, and if Kame suddenly working at the library after their encounter earlier that day meant something, then that meant he wouldn't be the one giving her the information.

So, later that day, she marched up to Shizune, determined to find out more about Shiranui.

(God forgive her for her piss poor mood after Kame, mask and at all, took her to Tsunade for what should have been simple training. Should have.)

It surprisingly didn't take much. Just a curious tilt of her head and some nicely placed words.

"I was at the library and there was someone new at the reception counter. He kept a senbon in his mouth my whole stay there—isn't that kind of unsanitary?"

Shizune lit up, recognition glinting in her eyes, and told her a bit of what she knew about him. It was a lot of information but Sakura couldn't bring herself to be surprised, not after Kame sought out Shizune the last time. She mentioned various little things like the fact that his senbon was poisoned (no wonder Shizune got along with him) or he was known to be rather laid-back and humorous. 

Shortly after that, the man in question appeared in his Anbu gear and led her away to Shizune for her to go through probably three of the most irritating hours of her life.

"Still not reading?"

She lifts her eyes from the unopened scrolls on her table and meets Genma's gaze head-on. Whilst he looks fairly bemused, she can pick up on something akin to concern in his orbs and for a whole moment it leaves her incoherent, unable to properly form thoughts.

"That's unusual, brat. You literally breathe books, after all."

She snaps out of her daze and narrows her eyes at him, before she wavers, and then sighs.

"... Just got a lot on my mind."

Shiranui Genma is different from Kame.

That's something she came to learn after a week of knowing the Anbu's identity.

There's probably nothing much that could beat her astonishment once she properly realized that Genma and Kame are the same person, a few days after the internal discovery.

Kame… is resigned. He lacks a certain something that makes most of the Anbu, lets himself drift apart a bit and showcases a lot of goodwill and natural cheer. He interacts with people bearing a polite although awkward tone and doesn't dwell for too long on things, content with being like the wind and drifting to everywhere the sky takes him whilst still keeping a rather serious air to him. He also seems uncomfortable often, stuck in his own thoughts. He treats her with curt nods and pleasant conversations, always giving her space and outright avoiding her when he doesn't need to converse. Kame is a tired person.

Genma is different, perhaps not the complete opposite but still seemingly a divergent person. He's rough at the edges and gruff. A frivolous, lackluster grin or a ferocious, cutting smirk decorate his face almost every time she sees him. There's always a sharp glint in his eyes, which settles on people to aspire amusement, weariness, or exhilaration. It doesn't help that he carries a poisoned senbon in his mouth. Especially when he starts speaking, his tone, either cheerful and careless in a way that screams danger or, sharp and rude, inspiring discomfort in people. He ruffles her hair constantly, messing it up in the process and teases her about anything from her love of books to her bright, pink hair. Genma is, most likely, also a tired person.

What probably bothers Sakura is the way he holds himself depending on his persona.

As Kame his back is straight and proper with his arms at his side near all his weapons, looking like a competent and healthy shinobi. As Genma, he tends to slouch a bit, hands in his pockets.

Yet, for whatever damn reason, Sakura comes to realize that Genma seems more alert than when he is in his Anbu gear.

"Hey, kid? Still alive?"

He's complicated, a complete puzzle, she thinks at that very moment, and I want to solve it.

Sometimes he sees himself as a little brat in her gaze and that shouldn't be happening, because he was rowdy and all scoff as a kid, glaring at people right and left as he threw cheekily insults around. He was a mess as a kid with spit in his words and always speeding things up unnecessarily. 

She's different though, quiet and thoughtful with her responses, nose deep into scrolls, reading even more than Ebisu ever did. There’s a patience to her person that surprises him because a lot of Genin fresh from the academy are always in a rush, wanting to get stronger, better, and higher-ranked faster than they really should.

That's what he thinks at first, but then one day, the door to the library crashes open and she tumbles in, a bit muddy and full of scratches with eyes that outburn the sun for a moment. She glares, and scoffs, and hisses, and teases back— and he gets it. 

It's her lack of confidence that's slowly building up, it's the knowledge of something in her eyes that probably shouldn't be there. It’s the way her body posture screams that she’s holding back something.

Something rowdy and all scoff, ferocious and sharp.

Haruno Sakura looks like she could tear at trees and overthrow mountains like she'd pick a fight with any deity that asks for it, and he feels the familiar ache in his chest. She’s a twelve-year-old kid just like he was. She’s a Genin just like he was. 

It's his curiosity that started this all (unbeknownst to him though, it was her curiosity that started it) but days turn to weeks and suddenly he's sure they'll turn to months too.

Genma is growing attached. He thinks about the brat he used to be, thinks about the brat she is going to be, and he knows he wants to see her grow up to overthrow mountains and fight deities.

How sentimental of him.

But then she smiles at him, eyes bright and alive and warm —and he thinks to himself that he'll ask the Hokage for more shifts at the library.

He'll find out what she's hiding.

(And maybe, just a little chance, he'll protect her from the consequences.)

The whole ordeal with Genma is one thing.

Another thing is, the day she gets called to Tsunade's office and Yamanaka Inoichi greets her, standing in front of the kage’s desk. A pleasant, kind smile is plastered on his face and his shoulders are relaxed but his chakra is slightly tensed in a way that sets the alarms off inside her mind.

Dread alongside cruel curiosity fills her and she awaits Tsunade's words patiently albeit a bit on alert. Did she do something wrong? Is it because of her interactions with Genma? Did he find out that she knows who he is?

Did Tsunade find out that Sakura has a whole list with Anbu and their identities saved in her mind?

"Sakura."

Her name is spoken with a strong voice. One that doesn't weaver or break—it's the voice of Senju Tsunade, the Godaime Hokage of Konohagakure. A person who's able to shatter the ground beneath her with only a tap of her foot.

Sometimes, Sakura yearns for a voice like that.

"Recently, I finally found some time to properly read the files and reviews on the last Chunin Selection Exams," she speaks, eyes staring intensely at Sakura, not ever once leaving her gaze.

She has always admired Tsunade's ability to directly voice her concerns, a perk from being the leader of Konoha's hospital and the village itself. The Kage never beat around the bush, not even mincing her words.

"There were concerns voiced by various Chunin and Jonin that observed your preliminary match against Yamanaka Ino."

Oh.

Now, it's coming to bite me back in the ass, huh?

"Due to the unnatural happenings throughout the match, Yamanaka Inoichi would like to perform a mind check on you."

Oh no.

Sakura's gaze slowly wanders to Inochi and she doesn't know what she expects—cold, hardened eyes akin to steel and an impassive face— but it's sure not the warm smile on the man's face.

"Don't worry, Sakura-chan. It won't be anything bad. Just a small inspection."

She thinks about him being part of the Analysis team. Ino mentioned it twice or thrice but even Konoha's grapevine never forgets that fact.

Analysis works closely together with T&I.

Boiling worry builds in her stomach despite his kind words.

Inspection? Sounds like he's going to dissect my mind.

"You'll be fine, Sakura."

She turns her gaze to her Kage and relaxes her posture a bit. Tsunade doesn't lie about stuff like this. If Sakura was bad off, she would tell her without missing a heartbeat.

But still…

"Well, then, let's go."

She nods, unable to speak up, her heart too heavy to carry any intent behind her words.

It doesn't turn out well.

At least not for Inoichi.

They end up in his office and he asks his round of questions and makes her sign a sheet agreeing to the mind jutsu treatment, so it can't come back and eat him in the ass later.

It's the same basic stuff—an agreement to get her mind invaded, awareness of potential problems that may arise and cause concerns in her abilities related to the mind, side effects like dizziness, and all that generally applies.

In exchange, Inoichi swears that private information won't be revealed to anyone but to the Hokage if they demand the knowledge (of course, in case of the information being critical to the village's safety or hinting at treason, this gets discarded).

After that, he continues to ask her simple questions about how her day was and if she likes the current weather—they mostly serve the purpose to give Sakura time to relax as well as to get her mind working slowly.

And then—"Alright, breathe in and breathe out thrice."Inoichi nods his head and then calmly lifts his arms and puts his hands into proper position.

She gulps.

(She's not ready, it's too scary, she can't breathe, someone help—)

The entering of her mind works seamlessly without any minor or major disturbances. Really, it all works quite too well in the first few minutes. 

And that's never a good sign.

"Ino?"

His daughter turns around from the bouquet she's working on and blinks in surprise.

"You're early," she tells him, a frown building upon her face, "did something happen?"

He chuckles before shaking his head. 

"I have a question."

She tilts her head in curiosity, staring him down with something searching in her eyes and there's pride swelling up inside him. She's even questioning her own father's intentions.

"What do you want to know?"

No promises of answers.

He smirks for a few seconds before settling into a calm smile.

"Your match against Sakura-chan in the Chunin exams," he speaks up, observing as his daughter stops wrapping the bouquets, "why did your technique fail?"

He knows it's not fair of him to phrase the question this way, indicating that she failed. But because of Ino’s pride, getting her irritated is the best way to weasel out information from here.

Ino narrows his eyes at him.

"Did it really fail?" she asks him instead. "It did work, after all." 

He can't help himself but grin for a moment. Emotional manipulation didn't work. Ino's been taking her studies seriously.

"That it did," he agrees with a curt nod. "But it got broken through—and that mere minutes after you used it."

It's not impossible to break through the clan jutsu.

It's extremely difficult though, accented by the fact that it's a secret clan technique and that a mere Genin shouldn't be the one able to break through it.

It's curious, really.

"Yes," Ino answers him with a smile, "her forehead makes place for a lot of interesting tricks."

Then she picks up the bouquets and smiles at him.

"I have to finish this before Mom comes back."

Ah, she learns well.

Sakura lets Inoichi roam around her mind for a bit. She knows he'll most likely pull the memories of the Chunin exams up as first. There are no issues with letting him see them as far as she's concerned. 

There's nothing of importance in these memories, really.

It's when he's done there and starts to probe in other areas that Inner reacts.

The first sign of something being off is that he starts to feel cold.

There shouldn't be any temperature in a mind.

Inoichi blinks and ice spears fly towards him.

He gets his kunai out and—

"Nothing can hurt you here, your weapon is unnecessary and considered an offense."

He blacks out.

"Aren't you one of Gai's?"

He blinks out of his thoughts, trying to shove the discomfort away.

He's currently in the library, staring at a man with a senbon in his mouth. That's damn unsanitary. He'd rather turn around and leave the place. Some meditating might help gather his thoughts or he could help Hinata with training. Well. Whenever he manages to approach her about training in the first place. It's probably not a good idea but his teammates keep telling him to try and his teacher keeps projecting the sunset behind him whenever Neji informs them that he still hadn’t spoken to her. 

"Hyuuga?"

He sighs.

He can't turn around now.

"Do you… do you know Haruno Sakura?"

He speaks her name with a stiff voice. Neji isn't even sure if he got it correctly. He's never paid attention to her. Lee might talk about her all the time but he usually just blends it out. She's never been as strong as both of her teammates.

(Which are both gone now. He's still surprised that Tenten and Lee keep talking to him and he's probably been a worse teammate to them than Sakura has to hers.)

But after that day it feels wrong to judge her when he hasn't even talked to her once.

The man lazily raises an eyebrow.

"What do you want with the brat ?"

But Neji is a Hyuuga. Observance is their deadliest weapon. He sees the little twitch, indicating that the man's lax posture is now more alert. He heard the hidden fondness when the man called her a brat.

And Neji knows how people see him, especially after his match against Hinata.

So, now he understands, that he hasn't been wrong the many times he's seen Sakura talking with this very man in front of him.

So, now Neji knows that he can't turn around and leave anymore.

Not when the man in front of him would most likely come to detest him for keeping shut.

Not after what he had seen on his way out of the hospital after his check-up.

"I saw Haruno Mebuki hit her daughter yesterday."

The man's posture turns rigid and Neji wonders what exactly he's doing in that library. Why exactly he went to this stranger than to Sakura's teacher. 

And he wonders why no one else seemed to notice because suddenly he's picking up on behavior traits that would indicate abuse. 

Even though he's never talked to her.

Chapter Text

Inoichi wakes up seconds after the blackdown in his office, trying to regulate his breathing pattern, before taking in his surroundings.

Then his gaze settles upon Sakura sitting across him on the green armchair, concern, and fear written on her face.

She doesn't say anything, even when she realizes that he's awake. He doesn't blame her for it. She must be shaken up from the whole experience.

So, he sighs and sits up properly, trying to register how much time has passed since he blacked out by looking at the clock. Two or three minutes, maybe. That's a lot more than he had expected. He glances back to the obviously exhausted girl, observing the way she haunches her shoulders and bites down on her lips. There are a few things he needs to clear up first, it seems.

"Are you okay?" He asks her, breaking the anxious silence lingering in the room.

She doesn't respond at all. Not even a small reaction. Really, who's to blame her? He certainly won't.

"Sakura," he calls out, "there's nothing wrong. Nor with you, with me or the previous happenings."

He sees her twitch but her gaze firmly remains on the ground. It seems he has to approach this differently then.

"A mind is a surprisingly fragile thing," he begins, observing her, "it doesn't break easily but parts—or pieces, so to say—can be chipped off without much strain. That's what happens to most people in the duration of their lives, from a peaceful civilian to a full-fledged shinobi."

"Naturally, even those harmed pieces can leave their habits and reactions behind, which can be noticeable if people know where to look."

People like him , neither one says.

"That said, if pieces continue to be chipped off these reactions will get stronger and cracks might form—something the mind will immediately try to stop from happening if the general state of one's mental health is good."

Sakura is now outright staring at him, and he can tell she's getting an inkling into what direction this is going.

"Success isn't guaranteed though. It depends on the overall strength and health of the mind as well as the body to a little extent. Plus, every individual will come up with another way to successfully stop the cracks from forming."

Then he stares right into her eyes.

"That's what your mind tried to do."

Tried to.

There's just one thing that's a bit unexpected.

"It used your inner voice to stop the cracks," he tells her, watching as she bites her lips once more, "It's not unheard of, though but also not a common occurrence."

In fact, he's surprised her mind was able to manifest her inner voice as a sort of overall protection. And to be able to use it to throw him out her mindscape…

She must have done it years ago.

An uneasy feeling settles in the pit of his stomach. There wasn't anything off about the memories he'd seen. They were mostly about her academy days and a few of her childhood. People tend to focus more on the memories they like the most, keeping them at the front of their minds. Ino told him Sakura was bullied when she was younger, so of course, she'd shove those memories to the back.

The few memories of her childhood that she had were of a forest with lots of flowers and a small river. Her parents rarely appeared in them but that was because they were merchants —plus, he had heard about her father's death. She must be shoving these memories to the side.

"Do you think there's a reason for your inner voice's manifestation?"

And it's then—he sees it clearly in the way her eyes widen for a moment before she shakes her head—that he starts to wonder what else her inner voice can do.

But he can't question her, it would only cause her distress and anxiety.

Seems like he has to let it go, for now.

"Alright, this concludes the mind check-up," he tells her, observing the way her shoulders drop in relief, "thank you for your participation."

Shizune is good at explaining things in an understandable way.

It's a realization he makes during his first days of training as a medical ninja.

"There are a few lessons where I'll have you, trail nurses, at the hospital but usually I'm going to be one teaching you. I hope you don't mind."

There isn't anything to mind considering she's a very skilled medic-nin. In fact, he's a bit baffled that she would consider taking him on as a student despite his lack of knowledge or skill. He wonders if it's because of Sakura dragging him to her office that day.

Which brings him to a whole other query.

Sakura Haruno.

Learning under Shizune means spending a lot of time with the Hokage as well.

"I do have duties to attend so this is the best way to get both done—also Tsunade-sama won't mind teaching you as well when I'll have to do something."

Which indicates that he would see Sakura a lot.

Except one whole week passes without Sakura appearing to her training. Both the Hokage and Shizune seem unusually stressed and concerned during that time. 

Shino doesn't ask though, because he does not know how to word his concerns and he fears he might come across wrong.

Then after that week passes, he arrives at Tsunade's office with Shizune, and Sakura stands there with a small smile on her face.

"Good morning, Shizune-senpai, Shino."

Her voice is calm and her posture lax but there are bags under her eyes.

"Haruno-san," he greets her back, "I hope you've been well."

Then she steps closer to him and crosses her arms.

"Sakura," she states, staring directly at him, "it's Sakura to you."

The sound of chuckling echoes around the room and Tsunade grin at him. "Better get used to address her as that. She sure won't back down, that stubborn brat she is."

He glances back at the girl in front of him. Seconds pass and he wonders if he should or shouldn't.

She keeps on staring at him with burning eyes.

"Sakura," he finally speaks up and her eyes start to sparkle, "is too familiar, Haruno-san."

Her posture deflates and she pouts, obviously disappointed with the turn of the events. For some reason, he can't help but grin.

Then she straightens up and smiles.

"At the end of this week, it won't be too familiar, Shino !"

Her smile is bright and full of cheer and confidence.

Something in him warms up at it—

"Perhaps."

"You let her address you by your given name."

He's picking up herbs with Shizune for an upcoming lesson.

Shino continues to gather the herbs without halting.

"We used to be seatmates at the academy."

It's confusing to him actually. Sakura almost always sat beside him. More than beside Sasuke. At some point, he realized that she would walk slowly into the classroom somedays or get held up by something for a while, leaving the other fangirls (mostly Ino) to catch the beloved place beside Sasuke.

Then without hesitation, she'd come up to the seat beside him, which was always left empty whenever she made it in time to Sasuke, and sits down, smiling at him.

"Good morning, Aburame-san!"

"Hello, Aburame-kun!"

"How are you doing today, Shino-kun?"

"I hope I'm not disturbing you from watching your insects, Shino."

She didn't mind the insects nor his silent nature. She would chat away sometimes but instead of it all being centered around Sasuke like when she talked with Ino or even Naruto, the topics were flowers, plants, animals, or anything else nature had to offer.

"Hmm, so you're obviously familiar enough with each other," Shizune points out. "Then why not address her by her given name?"

This is when Shino stops gathering the herbs.

In the midst of the academy lessons, when Iruka would talk about Konoha's wide history or explain theories upon theories, he would turn his head to look at Sakura.

Sometimes, she'd scribble in her book, writing down notes upon notes. Sometimes she'd observe Sasuke with a smile on her face and blushing cheeks.

Other times though, she would stare into space, not noticing anything around her.

Eventually, he started to nudge her a bit to help her snap out of it before anyone else noticed or Iruka called her name.

But before that he would look away, confusion settling in him.

"I won't address her by her given name yet. Why? Because I do not know her well enough for it," he answers softly.

"That's alright." 

Shizune smiles at him.

He said yet.

Genma doesn't think any of this is fair.

Just two weeks ago Shizune told him that the reason he had to get the brat to the Hokage, is because a Yamanaka wanted to check her mind. That's not something people like to hear, especially if it concerns 12-year-old kids who should just enjoy their childhood as much as they can whilst they still are able to.

Then Shizune reminds him of the preliminaries of the past Chunin exams and instead of feeling even only a bit relieved for having a sound reason, all he can do is try to ignore the nagging concern growing in him. He has no business getting attached to weird brats.

But despite how much shaken up she must have been, the girl continued to visit the library to banter with him and read even after the check-up.

And she must have been pretty shaken up because when he thinks back to that week and Shizune dropping by the library with a lunchbox for Sakura— "She requested a week off of training. I'm glad she still visits the library though."

But she's been fine, maybe a bit tired, but fine regardless.

So, really it's not fair that a Hyuuga out of all people comes to tell him that Sakura's mother hit her.

And his first thought is— You know how it is with shinobi, always picking fights, even in the midst of fam— and then he remembers that she's a civilian and her mother is in the hospital.

It's a tiring silence and he doesn't want to consider it. 

But the Hyuuga brat— and he remembers back at the Chunin exams, before the Uchiha appeared out of nowhere, a whole invasion behind him, there was an angry child telling the tale of a caged bird— looks bothered and awkward and goddamnit, there's no way he can risk this.

So, he pats the kid's shoulder and refrains himself from telling him to go home because it would cause only more distress. Instead, he sighs and tells him as it is.

"You see," he says, feeling a headache coming up, "we can't do anything right now."

That obviously annoys the kid.

"Yeah, you've seen her get hit but we need physical evidence."

"Haruno's cheek is bruised," the boy points out.

Genma grins at him, but it's full of scoff more than warmth.

"The brat is training to be a medic-nin, Hyuuga," he points out, trying not to laugh at the boy's poorly hidden surprise, "there won't remain any bruises to show-off."

But that's where the worst part comes in.

"Plus no one will believe you, genius son of the Hyuuga clan or not."

That's what catches the kid off guard and Genma sighs.

"There are Anbu stationed everywhere for reasons like these besides security. And you tell me none of them saw?"

There's no reply.

"Not impossible but also highly unlikely. In fact, some idiots must have ignored the signs because the brat is a civilian."

And that's the harsh reality.

A good portion of the graves in Konoha's graveyard belong to victims of domestic violence cases. In the fucking village that calls itself a family.

"Besides, even then, for cases like these, you need at least one Anbu to vouch for it."

It's complete bullshit because the rule was made, believing these utter morons would actually do their job properly.

Then again, that's what happens when you tell full-fledged murderers to care more about people than the mission.

"But…"

He pats the boy's shoulder.

"Come on, first we got to talk with Tsunade-sama."

At the Hyuuga's confusion, he grins.

"She'd definitely like to know how her apprentice is getting along with her family ."

"Careful, Anbu-san!"

He steps to the side, blinking as he takes in the pink hair and arms full of scrolls.

His former student marches in with a wide grin.

"Thanks!"

And then she proceeds to trip and the scrolls go flying towards the ground as she does—except he packs the back of her dress and catches her in time, before settling her onto her feet.

"Careful, Haruno-san," he mocks her, using chakra to alter his voice.

To his surprise she doesn't blush in embarrassment, instead, she keeps staring at him with a calculative gaze and it feels off.

Then she drops her smile and he notices the eyebags.

I didn't check her over immediately as I usually do.

"Careful Anbu-san," she echoes her words, gaining his curiosity, "you might sound like you care."

Her eyes widen immediately, red covering her cheeks, "S-sorry!"

Then she gathers the scrolls and runs off.

He keeps staring at her retreating back, wondering why her words sounded as if she knew him.

She couldn't possibly know, or?

"But I'm a Genin, so there's nothing of value you could need from me… except for information maybe?"

"Make sure to be on time for your appointment with Tsunade-sama this time. Wouldn't want to take after your old teacher now, or?"

He shakes his head and turns around. Really, it's none of his concern anymore.

"Shiranui-san."

There's no bruise , he notes as first before he grins at her, trying to shove the concerns to the side.

"Brat," he replies, "letting the door live today, eh?"

She scoffs then grins back. 

"Letting the library live, eh ?"

God, if that does remind him of himself back in his genin days he doesn't know. He chuckles, shaking his head gently.

"So? What are you going to read up on today?"

"Ah, I heard about this jutsu from Shino…"

As she keeps rambling, he stares at her.

He wants to ignore Hyuuga's words.

He really does but—

She only seems to look at the ground.

Chapter Text

"Sakura, dinner is finished."

She looks up from the colorful scribbles on the papers and stands up, stretching her tiny body.

"I'm coming!"

Hastily, she runs down the stairs, almost tripping down, but her hand catches the railing last second and she arrives safely on the floor. With a small smile, she runs the last part into the living room where her mother stands.

Mebuki clicks her tongue upon seeing Sakura.

"Wearing that bow again?" she mutters, annoyance sweeping in her tone, "I told you already, your forehead is too big for that."

She bits her lips but nonetheless keeps it on. It's a present from Ino, after all. She doesn't want the other girl to be mad at her.

So, she ignores her mother's glare.

The man at the counter—Ebisu, he said before—tells her that Genma most likely won't come to work at the library anymore. She balls her hands into fists and smiles. It's okay. Genma is really annoying anyway. He always teases her about her hair color and messes it up. Comments on the books she reads. Gives her small advice for her training. Brings her dango when she stays late at the library—although he kicks her out of the library, so she can eat it.

“It’s the only way to get you out, so I can close up, brat. Some people would like to be at 2000 hours, thank you very much.”

It's okay, Kame must have a lot of work.

So, she nods, tells Ebisu her identification information, and walks in to bury her nose into many, many scrolls.

It's so quiet and she can feel Ebisu’s cold gaze on her. She’s seen him twice or thrice but he never paid her that much attention before, so really, it couldn’t be her hair color. When he averts his gaze, she puts the book onto the table and sighs.

It’s way too quiet.

Just like a library should be, huh?

She tilts her head to the side, right when a cup flies into the spot it was before, shattering into tiny pieces with some cutting her cheeks.

Tears building at the corner of her eyes, she twists her head around to look at her father and gulps. He's drunk. Her mom's sitting calmly at the table, drinking a cup of coffee, and ignoring her.

It's not scary, she tells herself. This happens all the time, so it can't be scary.

It’s not scary. Really it isn’t.

(At night under her blankets, all alone, she tells the moon and the stars the truth. The sun though? The sun shall never know.)

Shino hands her a book about herbs when she gets into the office. 

"Why?" He mutters upon seeing her confusion, "because we have to go pick some next week."

She looks down at the book and realizes it's the academy standard one, so blinking she stares up at him.

"I know this book by heart."

She thinks back to hidden bruises with make-up tended with makeshift medicine from herbs. It’s not an easy realization but it’s something she knows by heart. Certain herbs can help, other herbs can make it worse. 

So, she remembers all pages of the book, number by number. Every herb listed and all it’s descriptions and information.

He stares for a moment, saying nothing—and she wonders if it's because he doesn't believe her if he's going to be disappo—"I see. That'll make the herb picking easier for you next week."

You.

She doesn’t like the way he says it. His phrase makes it sound like he thinks she wouldn’t help him. Sakura bits her lip and stares at the ground. Was she that bad in the academy? Of course, she tried her best to be standoffish enough that people wouldn’t approach her for serious stuff. She likes Sasuke—or liked?—but in the end, even he brought her a form of cover. As a fangirl, Sakura had to be pushy and unpleasant. Ino was also very convenient because she was from a ninja clan, so instead of gathering around her the other fangirls would surround Ino—leaving Sakura all alone. Sasuke wouldn’t have ever properly paid her attention, especially if she kept being annoying as he always put it. The only issue was Naruto’s quite surprising crush on her? She’s not even sure if you could call that a crush. Then again, her own crush on Sasuke was a mess too, so she kept her mouth shut about Naruto’s questionable crush on her and tried to drive him away with petty insults. It never really worked, and at some point, she must have become bitter about it.

That’s when the insults got harsher and now, after weeks of wondering why they put their team together, she feels the guilt gnawing on her heart. She wanted to be alone, so people wouldn’t suspect. She wanted to be seen as “fangirl” and “annoying” on the surface, so they wouldn’t even try to see. It was really unnecessary though, to harm Naruto for that goal. 

Shino though, is the other one, that she could never really hold too far apart. They weren’t extremely close, but she’d like to say that after years of choosing to sit beside him than Sasuke, they formed a small bond—albeit not one that really went anywhere but one that existed nonetheless. And now after years of trying to make sure he wouldn’t even consider anything she did as alarming, she’s trying to nurture the bond. She must have gone crazy. The situation hasn’t changed that drastically, she should be keeping him at distance.

But Sasuke, Naruto, and Kakashi are gone.

But she’s apprenticed under the damn Hokage out of all people, a woman surrounded by a thousand watchful eyes.

But she’s grown closer to an Anbu, observant enough to notice that she keeps stalling to go home but polite enough to not mention it to her.

"Shino," she says after seconds of silence, "it's us ."

He doesn't respond for a moment and she wonders if she finally has done it after she dared to take the first step.

Overstepped the line.

But then he lifts his head and she can’t see his eyes, can’t see much of his face thanks to the collar, and yet Sakura somewhat knows.

"Thank you."

His words are sincere.

"What did you do, idiot? Your hair's all chopped up?"

Her mother's eyes are blazing with rage.

"Who's going to marry you like this? How the hell am I supposed to make you presentable now? The hair is all you had going for yourself!"

The hair is all you have going for yourself.

It doesn't sting.

It doesn't sting.

(She’s never going to tell the sun.)

Ino stretches her arms.

"Shika's complaining now. Something about you being too busy."

Sakura blinks, shrinking into herself a bit and of course, Ino notices.

"I agree with him, you know? Trying to meet up with you is so difficult."

Ah, Ino's mad now.

"Therefore! The next time you get free, you're immediately reserving it for me, forehead."

Sakura blinks before a grin slips onto her face.

"My free time for you, pig? Hmm…"

"Hey! No arguing, you have to!"

"I suppose I do… wouldn't want you to be lonely."

They both bicker and laugh with each other.

There's warmth.

She missed that warmth for so long.

But she was the one who cut it apart.

Shizune smiles at her but she seems troubled about something.

"Sakura," she says and she can feel Shino's attention on them, "I'm giving you off a bit earlier."

Huh?

"Go visit your mother. It's been a while, hasn't it?"

She doesn't want to. She doesn't want to walk into that room and feel complete dread wash over her the moment Mebuki's icy eyes settle on her. Plus the woman has been getting better and will most likely return to the house soon.

She really doesn't want to go but she can't say that—it would sound too suspicious.

So, instead, she smiles brightly at Shizune.

"Thank you! I'll catch up with work tomorrow, I promise!"

Shizune smiles at her.

"Of course."

Leaving the room, she bids Shino goodbye and then walks the path towards her mother's room.

She doesn't want to deal with her mother's complaints but there's nothing she can do now. Well, she might as well just go through with it and put it behind her. Once it's done, it's done, after all.

With a bitter sigh, she walks towards her mother's hospital room.

"... Mom?"

Kame blinks, glancing at Shizune.

"Sakura is dear to me," she tells him, the tone of her voice unyielding, "you should understand."

He sighs, staring at the few other Anbu in the room before he nods.

"Everyone into your positions!"

Both Sakura and her mother are quiet, rarely speaking with each other. The whole conversation is something Kame wouldn't put down as a child conversing with their parents.

They wait and wait for 30 minutes before something happens.

And maybe because they've grown tired, thinking nothing will happen anymore. Maybe because almost everyone doesn't want to observe a little kid with pink hair.

Maybe it's because of all that.

Or maybe it isn't.

But the surprise comes like a punch to the gut tearing past their defenses, and before he knows it, Kame is moving out of his hiding place.

Past him jumps Shizune, rage in her movements as she tears Mebuki over her daughter's limp body.

The other Anbu jump into position, surrounding Mebuki but Kame pays her no mind—Shizune has it under control.

Instead, he lands beside Sakura, trying his best not to look at the bruises. Not yet.

He helps her sit up and pats her back as her coughs echo in the room. Only after she calms down, move his eyes to the bruises.

To the ring of red and purple around her throat.

He can't move his eyes away anymore.

Sakura almost let herself be murdered.

Genma can't move his eyes away.

And in the midst of Shizune’s harsh commands and the Anbu’s rushing movements, the girl whispers her first words since their appearance. She stares up at him, her eyes sparkling with emerald.

For a moment, he wonders if he’s heard her right.

(So, the little girl told the sun.)

Chapter Text

I fall asleep at the dawn of your misery

"They aren't talking at all."

Shizune sighs, clutching the hem of her kimono tightly. Her eyes are set on Mebuki, carefully following every little movement. She shakes her head at the Anbu's words. "That's just more worrisome."

Kame can't help but agree with her, staring at the pink-haired girl sitting in the chair. She's too pale and her hands are shaking a bit. It's almost unnoticeable with the way she holds them against herself in a rather calm manner but he—he's observing her with great focus. There's nothing that he can allow to escape his notice.

"Haruno-san is staring out of the window," another agent points out.

Love me gently

Love me broken

True to that shinobi's words, the woman's face is turned towards the window. Maybe she's not feeling well? She's been down with something in the last few weeks after all...

But then his stare lands on the reflection on the window.

And a shimmer of rage sparks up in him, flaring up like candlelight. 

To the sound of your lulling voice

She's glaring.

Haruno Mebuki is glaring, not even looking at her daughter once.

"Shizune”, he mutters.

"I know."

Her tone is harsher than usual.

Good.

Pull me closer

Pull me tighter

He makes sure to shield Mebuki's view of the brat as he pats the kid's back with one hand and clutches her shoulder loosely with the other. Purple-reddish lines decorate her neck and he has to push the rage to the side—he doesn't want her to be frightened by any unnecessary behavior of his.

It's hard to keep calm though, not when her coughs echo loudly around the room.

A gentle caress under the sleeping stars

I'll hand you my heart, my vows, and my dreams

I'll let you paint my skin with scars

Please respect my daring tears

As the sound of Shizune's calm but firm voice fills the room, he loosens up a bit. He knows she won't let Mebuki off easily. Then he glances down at the kid and meets the sight of frightened emerald orbs.

There's something else.

I'll become your stepping stone

Every insult will be regarded as a compliment

My past, my present, and my future shall be yours

Please don't forget my terrified eyes

She grabs onto his armor and lowers her gaze, trying to hide the forming tears at the corner of her eyes.

Before Genma can voice his concern and among the noise created by the room's other occupants, her small voice whispers something.

I awake to the dusk of your prosperity

"... sorry...I'm… s-sorry… Shiranui-san…"

Shiranui-san.

He didn't mishear that. He didn’t. But before he can comment on it, Sakura lets go of him and grabs her hair—too short, too short —and tears at it.

“Why… why...doesn’t she l-love me?”

Genma doesn’t know how to answer her.

Seconds pass and takes her hands and stops her from tearing at her hair.

He doesn’t know why her mother couldn’t love her.

He doesn’t know. What is he supposed to tell her?

Slowly, she looks up at him and he has to stop himself from visibly reacting. Red-rimmed eyes stare up at him.

And her gaze. 

Uncomfortableness starts to creep up in his stomach.

“S-Shiranui-san.”

Ah, right. She knows .

“Why are you all here? Why have you been watching me the whole time? Why? It... it was so unsettling."

He blinks. Did she know?

And before he can speak up, the sound of heels echo in the hallways, and Tsunade steps in.

“Because I told them to observe you.”

“... Why?”

The Hokage steps closer and kneels down beside Genma. Her eyes soften as she glances at her apprentice.

“Because you needed help, Sakura.”

Sakura blinks but immediately shakes her head.

"No... I don't..."

She trails off, looking at something behind him. Genma turns around.

Shizune's student and the Hyuuga kid are staring back at them.

Be courteous with the threads around my neck

Chapter Text

"What are you doing here?"

Neji raises an eyebrow, unable to stop himself from scoffing at the other shinobi. Both have spoken out the question at the same time, a fact that irritates Neji a bit.

Admittedly, he technically shouldn't be here, but he's gotten too curious (and a bit concerned, if he's honest). After all that has happened recently, he doesn't think Konoha's ANBU force is trustworthy enough. Or capable enough, if he thinks back to Kame's rather colourful ramblings about the assassination force. 

It doesn’t help that the pink-haired girl is Uzumaki Naruto’s teammate as well. He’s been on standoffish terms with the boy since the Chunin exams. Of course, Uzumaki’s words have helped him… to some extent. Yet, even if a part of him acknowledges that he cannot bring himself to accept the other’s words wholeheartedly. It feels wrong. 

“I’m here to see Haruno-san.”

He breaks out of his thoughts and looks at the other, confusion settling in his eyes for a few seconds before he realizes that the other is talking about Haruno Sakura. Right, Sakura with the pink hair. The very person he is here for on that day. 

“And you?”

Should he answer? There’s no point in telling the other. It’s none of his busi—except, the other is here for Haruno. Neji’s seen those two talk with each other once when he was in the hospital with Hinata for a check-up. Haruno was smiling that time.

“I’m here… for Haruno-san as well.”

And it’s almost unnoticeable but Aburame's posture changes. It’s distrustful and for a moment he wants to scoff at the other, to point out that he’s seen the change.

And yet he can’t.

The Chunin exam lingers on his mind, a weary reminder that the other has all right to act like this, no matter how much it irks him. Neji knows what image of him others seem to have. It's the price he has to pay for his ruthless actions.

In that moment, they hear a sound coming from the room and without hesitation, Neji opens the door. He refuses to waste even one second in case something is happening.

He just doesn't expect to see Haruno's state of well-being. Are you okay? A part of him desperately wants to voice out those thoughts but his voice won't work. It's pathetic in a sense. Why can't he out of all people not talk? He doesn't even know her.

Aburame though, doesn't waste one second as he walks calmly into the room and stops near Haruno and the anbu. Then he kneels down and stares at her for a bit. Everyone watches his actions in bated silence, even the Hokage. The girl looks at the ground, unable to hold the other's stare. 

And then she snaps her head up, eyes wide.

"Sakura… do you require help?"

Later, Shizune would stare at him with a puzzled expression and ask him why he used Sakura's first name.

He'd think about her on the ground with bruises and scratches. He'd think about the marks on her neck and then remember her spacing out during class back in the Academy.

It's matching up now.

He'd continue with his work and then speak up, talking as if it's any usual topic. As if it's just a normal admission, nothing unusual.

"She's someone I know."

Maybe not too well but well enough. Close enough.

And that is nothing unusual.

Her first name. 

Shino has never used her first name before except that one time he turned down her offer.

But never properly, never to address her.

Is it out of pity? 

Here she's sitting on the floor, sobbing uncontrollably like an idiot, with ugly bruises around her neck. And it hurts to cry but she just can't stop herself. Not even in front of so many people. It used to be so easy to hide, to calm down. Of course, she's always been prone to crying, always too emotional.

"Sakura."

She blinks, trying to rub the tears away but they just won't stop. Looking at Shino, she can't tell what he's thinking. The high collar of his jacket and his glasses hide away anything that might indicate his thoughts and opinions.

But he's looking directly at her.

She bits her lip. What does she say? Is there even anything to say?

He slowly raises his hand, making sure it stays in her vision. For a few seconds—no, minutes—he keeps it mid-air, waiting for her reaction. She doesn't give him a response. No affirmation.

But no denial either.

So, he moves it again.

And then lays his hand down on her head.

He's seen the Hokage and the anbu—Kame—pat Sakura's head a few times. 

Sakura doesn't mind being touched in theory. He's observed her and she never really seemed bothered about Yamanaka hugging her or someone tapping her shoulder. There's absolutely no indication of abuse in her behaviour, one could say.

That's not exactly it.

Touch seems to be ok, even appreciated—maybe even needed. 

Almost as if she's starved of it.

Shino isn't very affectionate, it's just not the way his clan works. Certain words and actions take more than the silence he can give. But he's not cold-hearted and he does consider Sakura a close friend. She goes out of her way to reassure him and help him—he can and will do the same, no matter how strange and awkward it seems to him.

So, he pats her head, nods once, and then helps her up, shifting some of her weight onto him, by having her lean on his shoulder. She doesn't weigh much. He knows she had that terrible diet but he also knows she stopped it, when she started training under Tsunade. There's only one proper reason.

Shino glares at Haruno Mebuki and the occupants of the room can feel the mood drop.

The Aburame are neutral and hide their emotions and opinions well. But they hold grudges with unpredictable stubbornness and vigour. 

And they will retaliate.

After all, they love to fight.

Chapter Text

Shino doesn't leave her side. No matter who approaches and for what, he just silently stares at them, his gaze digging into them like a warning. Sometimes, they hear the sound of bugs buzzing.

He's clearly threatening them.

The moment Haruno Mebuki was dragged out of the room, away from Sakura, he relaxed a little bit—but not by much. Neji can see it in his stance.

That said, he still plans to approach the pink-haired girl, no matter how hostile her friend will react to his presence. Why exactly he’s so determined to talk with the girl is beyond his understanding. Surely, it’s partially out of concern for her well-being. That the top military force of the village didn’t notice—no, pay attention to her issues, is laughably sad. But he sees it for what it is—as someone coming from an unimportant civilian family, they wouldn’t have bothered to care anyway. But to go so far for her...

Maybe it’s because he was the one to discover, to realize first. Maybe he feels like there’s another weight on his shoulders now—one he doesn’t want to lift just yet. But why? He doesn’t understand, even when he’s already in front of the other two, staring ahead at Sakura, whose gaze is set on the ground. What does he even say to her? Especially after what just went down. He can feel Shino’s gaze turn even more piercing and then—

“Hyuga,” Shino mutters his name, “do you require something?”

Does he? Neji doesn’t know if he should say something—he doesn’t even have to say something. What is he doing there?

Sakura slowly lifts her head and stares at him—he feels uncomfortable. Her gaze, it’s meek and it’s tired. All the things he’s felt after the battle against her blonde-haired, loud-mouthed teammate. Former teammate , his mind whispers, team seven is no more. It’s laughable though. Why is he hesitant? It’s unlike him, it’s irritating. 

Then someone walks up behind him and slowly lays down a hand onto his head. He turns to face the person—one of the anbu. Brown eyes stare down at him, something comforting in them.

“He does have something to say,” the man mutters in reply to Shino before nodding at Neji. For a moment, he wonders why the Anbu seems so familiar. 

“Come on, kid, have some confidence.”

Neji almost wants to lash out. Almost. Because he knows his confidence isn’t there at the moment. Because he knows he’s struggling with saying something. He shouldn’t be. Sighing quietly, he steps a bit forward but stops, making sure not to approach her too closely. 

“I think,” he finally speaks up, directly gazing at her, “that you were—are...”

He hesitates for a moment, unsure of how to word it. But her curious eyes stare back at him and curiosity isn’t discomfort or fear.

“I think you are strong in a way… that most people aren’t,” he says with an odd finality in his tone.

What is strength?

Does he still hold the same answer as before his fight with Naruto? Neji doesn’t know.

But Neji knows that her eye wides and Shino’s slight nod are indicators.

Indicators that his words were heard .

Strength? How do you define something so varied anyway?

Genma pats his head and when Neji glances up the man’s smiling.

Maybe this is fine.

Tsunade feels like drinking sake. A lot of it. 

“Tsunade-sama.” Shizune approaches her, a tight smile on her face. “Haruno Mebuki is being detained right now and kept under watch by a few Anbu.” What should we do next? The question is left unsaid but it echoes in both their minds.

They will have to do quite a few things. Get that woman a mental check-up, have the custody of Sakura taken from her and a lot of paperwork. Depending on what the check-up will tell them about her. So, yes, there’s a lot to do regarding that woman.

But Tsunade has neither the patience nor the motivation to deal with that woman any longer than she did that day.

“Keep her in a cell for now,” she mutters tiredly, “perhaps that will make her re-think her actions.”

What a joke. Of course, it won’t. 

They can deal with Mebuki tomorrow though. For now, there’s a more important matter. The Hokage settles her gaze onto her apprentice standing near the Hyuuga brat and Shino. She still looks shaken up, exhausted in a way she shouldn’t be—it tugs at what’s left of Tsuande’s sympathy. 

That girl has no one now. Just like her. 

For a moment, Tsunade wonders what it would be like to take the girl in. To raise her herself—but then she remembers bloodied bodies and pain she cannot ever forget. This is too much already. This all, the mantle of the Hokage is too big of a hurdle already. An alcoholic, old woman trying to muffle out her pain is the kind of person Tsunade really is—no one should experience that. 

Not her. Tsunade can’t take her in. Not with her current state.

She frowns, unable to gaze away from the girl for a moment. Then Sakura looks up, emerald eyes digging into her own—Tsunade forgets to break. 

“More appointments with Yamanaka Inoichi for Sakura,” she states, finally managing to tear her gaze away to glance at Shizune. Then she considers something, staring at the other woman. “As for her current guard—”

“I have someone in mind,” Shizune interrupts her, the tightness in her smile decreasing.

“Oh? Who would that be?”

There’s a warm expression on Shizune’s face, her eyes brightening up when she answers. It leaves Hokage surprised, especially once she hears the name.

“Shiranui Genma.”

The name is spoken out gentle and soft, like a quiet admission, like something natural. Perhaps, her surprise unwarranted. Wasn’t Shiranui the one to check on her wellbeing? Rushing immediately to her when everyone jumped at Mebuki. The more she thinks about it the more it makes sense.

Tsunade nods her head.

The man might be a bit lackluster but he’s got a good head on his shoulders and his principles aren’t shared by many—but they would do Sakura more than well. She’s starting to see that the more she thinks about it. 

“Kame-san,” she calls out into the room, watching as the man turns around to face her, lifting his hand from the Hyuuga’s head. He nods at the kids courtly, leaning in to whisper something to Sakura. Then he moves towards them.

Tsunade’s mind is set.

She smirks at him, eyes glinting in satisfaction. 

He’ll do more than well.

She stares at Kame’s—no, Genma’s retreating back before the realization that she’s now alone with Shino and Neji settles in her mind.

She doesn’t know how to feel—it’s like everything should have stopped, should be stopping. But there's just this dull ache. She isn’t tired, no. She isn’t sad. Or angry. Or anything.

It doesn’t feel like an ending.

But neither does it feel like a beginning.

Sakura feels like she’s just drifting in nothingness.

And she doesn’t know when she’ll be back to standing on the ground.

If she’ll ever be back. 

Chapter Text

“You want me to… what?”

To be fair, he should have seen this coming. Or something similar. Shizune has been eyeing him in a specific way recently. It was a very considerate and calculative gaze—with Shizune that always meant she was planning something.

Genma sighs as he gazes at the Hokage. He… well he can’t deny the decision fully but it’s still questionable in his opinion.

“Are you doubting Shizune’s decision?” Tsunade stares back at him, eyes hardened. She won’t back down. Not easily at least. He already knows why.

Someone completely unwilling wouldn’t even be taken into consideration in the first place. 

He groans, shaking his head softly. 

“Nope, I’m not doubting her,” he mutters exasperated, “I’m doubting myself .”

Tsunade leans back in her chair but her gaze stays attentive, a clear sign for him to continue talking.

“I know that I’m considered a mother-hen by almost everyone that knows me,” he speaks up, “I also understand that they are partially right. I like to drink but I’ll stay sober if someone needs to be taken home, I let people stay over if it’s too late or they are too wasted. I cook for others if they need to eat, I also go out of my way to help out with household issu—”

“Shiranui, you’re counting down reasons why exactly you would do well as a caretaker,” Tsunade interrupts him, raising an eyebrow at him. 

“No, I’m not. I’m counting down things that contribute to me having my life somewhat together as an adult,” he stresses. “Which by the way, is an incredible feat if you consider what shit my generation went through.” 

The war. That one thing that no one should have to experience. But they did and it left its marks on most of his allies, himself included.

Before Tsunade can question his words once more, he continues talking.

“You see, I’m great at those things but that doesn’t qualify me as a… parent.”

“Guardian,” Tsunade points out.

“No, parent. ” He’s not going to give in with that one. “That girl needs a person that cares enough about her to try and raise her… or well, help her through this. Not someone who just makes sure she doesn’t end up in an orphanage.” The assassin raises one hand to his forehead, fingers treading through his loose bangs. “She needs a parent, Tsunade.”

“And pray tell me why you can’t be that parent?”

“Because I might be good at having my shit together and somewhat taking care of my friends, but… but my friends are people that know how to be independent and take care of themselves and not to rely on me. It would be completely different with Sakura,” he mutters. “She might have trouble realizing it at first, but she’ll end up relying on me to take care of her.”

That’s it. Sakura will want at least some constancy. At least one person that she can rely on, will help her. Genma is not that person. He cannot be that person. He’s neither good at keeping constancy to anything he does and even though he might be called a mother-hen, he’s a mess when no one’s around. How is he going to take care of Sakura? He’ll probably end up neglecting her, just like her parents—these assholes—did and what will happen to her then? How will she get better, climb out of that dark circle of abuse? And what about her mental state? There’s no way having hi as caretaker would do her we—

“Relying on me ,” Tsunade speaks up, her gaze even more intense than before. “Shiranui, you’re already talking as if you’re her parent.”

He blinks.

“That’s a lot of thought you put into this. Tell me, would someone who truly doesn’t want to be a parent, put such thoughtful considerations into the situation?”

She’s smirking now and he just knows that he can’t change her mind after that point.

“Sure, you have your doubts. I’m certain a lot of people would—even parents that plan on raising children.” Tsunade leans her chin on her hands. “But you see, for someone who believes himself to be such a terrible parent, you’re taking matters of her care and health into deliberation, which her biological parents certainly didn’t.”

Genma blinks.

How the hell is he supposed to argue with that?

“Maybe think about it from a different perspective: Why would you be a good parent?”

There has been a lot going on recently. Perhaps too much, if someone asks him. This all, whatever it is, started weeks ago. 

With the disbandment of the genin team under his care. 

Hatake Kakashi knew from the very beginning that it wouldn’t work out—he just wasn’t meant to teach kids. His expertise lied in killing and killing and killing. Just another tool for another village. 

Yet no one listened to his protests—as that everything spiraled into the chaos that Team 7 revealed itself to be. He couldn’t save Sasuke, couldn’t aid Naruto.

And God knows, he wasn’t even sure what to do with Sakura. 

(He just didn’t want to see her die.)

The worst case situation happened—Sasuke left, Naruto left, and he left Sakura all alone.

A terrible ending to a terrible thing. 

To be fair, he was hoping Sakura would give up on the path of a ninja and instead turn to something more befitting of her meek nature—something safer.

But instead, Tsunade took her in. 

As an apprentice.

He knows there is something different about her nowadays. Something that has shifted and continues to shift. His little encounter with her was proof enough. Those snappy remarks? Unlike her usual style but somehow they fit her. 

Is this what he has been missing?

He can’t mull on the question for too long—Tsunade calls him into her office. When he arrives there, Shiranui Genma and Shizune stand there, everyone obviously waiting for him. 

And as curiosity fills him, Genma speaks up. 

“Haruno Mebkui has been arrested for abusing Sakura.”

Everything falls into place.

Kakashi wishes it didn’t.

Chapter Text

He’s lost for words.

Really, what even would be a proper response? I’m sorry. Is she okay? What’s happening now? Kakashi doesn’t know.

How should he know?

He’s lived through countless tragedies but no one ever bothered to show him how to properly deal with the aftermath of every single one. Right. He was shoved further and further into the network of the most fucked up people in Konoha because he was skilled . Skilled at killing people twice his age. And then somewhen, maturity came, but what did it bring to him? The relentless anger quelled down and transited into muted sadness that engulfed his very existence—he couldn’t get rid of it anymore. He didn’t want to get rid of it anymore.

“Evidence suggests it’s been going for years.” 

Something churns in his stomach. Years . When she was under his care, too. He suspected that the moment the revelation left Tsunade’s mouth but he tried to deny it anyway. It’s almost funny, isn’t it? Things he used to nag her about subtly, suddenly have an explanation. How many times did he tell her to stop putting on too much make-up? Or to stop skipping meals? Or that her clothes weren’t suited for training or well, the occupation as a whole. So many things he wrote her off for, but perhaps that choice wasn’t his nor hers to make. 

But still, as much as it garners on his mind, he’s confused. 

“Tsunade-sama,” he mutters, voice tight, “why are you telling me this?” 

She looks at him with her stern eyes and he’s sure many other people would have feared for their lives—Kakashi is tired though. He knows very well that he’d deserve a teardown from her. 

She leans back in her chair and sighs. It’s a heavy sound, one that brings down the temperature in the room—it’s a sound beyond exhaustion and disappointment. From his side, he notices Genma staring at him, eyes filled with something he cannot comprehend. Do these feelings belong there? 

“Hatake, you were never suited to be a teacher,” she states and he wants to laugh. Truly, where was she when the creation of team 7 happened?

“That I agree with,” she continues before her gaze twists into a glare, “but that doesn’t mean you had to be an asshole nor a careless fool.”

He can’t even get mad at her—the reminder of Sakura’s situation prevents him from it, drags him down further to the bottom, and leaves him tired, tired, and tired . It’s visible to him as well, with Sasuke’s deflection and Naruto’s absence. But that’s it? He hasn’t only failed Sasuke and Naruto.

He has failed Sakura as well. 

At his silence, the Hokage shakes her head. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m not telling you this because I expect you to do something about it.” 

Confusion enters his mind for a moment. Why else would she tell him then?

“I’m telling you so that you know better than to carelessly approach her with that lackluster attitude of yours.”

Her voice sounds bitter and her words are sharp—but he needs that. Needs to feel the dread of it, the fear that crawls in his mind. 

He lets the silence drag on for a while before he speaks up again, asking a question that slowly creeps up from the deepest corners of his mind, seeking the solace of freedom and knowledge. 

“Is this a punishment?” 

Shizune shifts from the corner of his eye, her eyes slightly wide. Gemma’s sigh resounds around the room.

“For what, Hatake? For not doing your job? For not guiding these kids properly?”

It’s daunting , he realizes, how my mistakes cling onto my skin, digging their claws into my flesh.

“...Do you want it to be a punishment, Hatake?”

He wonders about that as well.

She’s oddly quiet. Although, with the current situation that isn’t exactly a surprise now, or?

He hasn’t seen her much around—being one year older than her generation and all that. But the times he did… she’s been loud. Starstruck in love with her teammate, competitive with the blonde-haired Yamanaka. Maybe a bit annoying. Ok, a lot annoying. 

But right now, at that very moment? He’d prefer that annoying girl over this.

She looks so dead , his thoughts swirl in his mind, hectic chaos, emptier than her teammate. Former teammate. 

It’s then that Shino moves, gently sitting down at the bed she’s laying on.

“Shizune-sensei will be back soon,” he mutters quietly. “Do you want anything to eat?”

Right . She hasn’t eaten anything. Not bothering with listening to her answer, he leaves the room. 

And comes back with fruit—apples, bananas, pineapple, tangerines.

That’s when she lifts her head for the first time since she’s been relocated to the hospital room. A good sign in his opinion. Stepping closer, he puts the bowl of fruits on the table beside the bed and gets a clean kunai out of his pouch—it’s new, so there aren’t too many concerns about using it. The other two teens observe him as he carefully cuts all the fruits into tiny pieces, adamant about not making a mess. 

“That’s unsanitary,” Shino points out. 

And of course, he has no better reply than, “You literally have insects living in your body.”

“I assure you, Hyuuga-san, these insects are more sanitary than you as you have proven right now.”

Well. He’s not sure how to take this—usually, it would have garnered on his temper, but there’s a stressed-out girl in the room right now and he doesn’t want to risk scaring her or anything. 

“... You both are being a bit dumb,” Sakura mumbles.

Neji almost drops the apple he’s cutting—she hasn’t said anything for hours. Shino turns around, quietly gazing at her, uttering no words. The people of the Aburame clan have always been quiet, so he isn’t surprised.

Though as the seconds turn into minutes, he realizes something.

Shino’s waiting for him to say something, trying to gauge Neji’s intention and thoughts. 

So distrustful . Neji scoffs before his expression twists into something softer as he picks up the bowl and holds it out to the pink-haired girl, who’s warily staring at him. Like a cornered animal.

That’s something familiar for him. 

Chapter Text

Sakura eats the fruits Neji cuts for her with a feeling of confusion settling in her. She’s not exactly sure why the other is there, cutting fruits for her and making sure that she eats them all–her mind is all muddled and she can’t even tell if she’s properly awake or still drifting off. She can’t process everything that happened that day, doesn’t even really want to recall it all. Shino is right beside her. He doesn’t say anything and she doesn’t expect him to. But his gaze lingers on her injuries sometimes, before he looks up to stare at her face. Every few minutes she lifts her head and stares back. She can’t see his eyes behind those sunglasses but she’s sure she is looking right into his eyes. He doesn’t react though. Just lets her stare. But his mouth twitches a bit, the corners of his lips drawing up.

The way his shoulders hunch and how he holds her gaze are telling. He’s relieved.

But why?

She never seems to come to a satisfying conclusion, so she turns to gaze at Neji who peels and cuts fruits, concentration barely wavering.

She remembers him from the exams and from the rescue mission for Sasuke.

(For once her mind doesn’t linger on Sasuke and on any other day she would have laughed about that, disbelief in the sound of it.)

Never has he really acknowledged her.

(“He’s the one who found out, Sakura-chan.” Shizune tells her, no smile on her face.)

She’s mad. Or was. At the moment, it’s rather difficult to honestly be mad at him. Instead, she decides to focus on curiosity. She has questions lingering in her, willing to be spoken out, to be asked.

“Why… why are you here?”

He stops peeling the apple in his hand. It’s quiet. She’s not sure if he’ll answer. That’s when Shino moves for the first time in a while, leaning closer to her–it leaves her surprised at his willingness to be close–and reaches to take the apple and kunai out of the other one’s hands.

“You should focus on talking,” he explains as he starts peeling the apple. Neji snaps out of it then and then glances at Shino, raising an eyebrow.

“Unsanitary?”

“Don’t avoid the question.”

It’s then that she realizes–Shino’s testing the other boy.

Minutes linger in silence and she wonders if she should just call off the question at that point. It’s getting too uncomfortable. Shino seems to notice that too as he stops cutting the apples to pat her arm twice–a gesture that seems a bit awkward in its movements but genuine nonetheless–before giving her one apple piece. It’s when she’s chewing on it, that Neji sighs before speaking up.

“Uzumaki,” he mutters and she can feel Shino stiffen beside her–she doesn’t blame him. As far as everyone’s concerned, her former teammates are a taboo topic around her, so Neji namedropping one of them is seen as bold. And probably insensitive.

For her though… she just feels strange. She hasn’t thought about Naruto for a while now. Bless his soul, but she never really grew closer to him or Sasuke, not in the way those two did to each other. Sure, in that forest during the exams, there were sparks. Sure, after Sasuke’s escape, they talked and tried to comfort each other. Or more like, Naruto tried to comfort her and she tried not to think about the whole ordeal altogether.

“Made me think about some things and then I saw,” Neji speaks, halting for a moment in the midst of the sentence. His eyebrows furrow and his voice sounds strained when he continues to speak. “You… and I guess it’s the first time I properly paid attention to you.” Because I ignored you due to your lack of strength before, is what he doesn’t say.

It’s quiet again and she doesn’t know how to reply. Is there even anything to reply to?

“I’m confused.” Neji breaks the silence again. “I didn’t know Aburame-san and you were close…I didn’t know you were Hokage-sama’s apprentice. I… didn’t know you…”

She understands then.

He feels just as out of it as she does. That’s fine. Naruto had a way with words that got to a lot of people, of course, he’d tear down whatever Neji had going on to some extent.

Shino doesn’t speak up once and she doesn’t expect him to. He is clearly waiting to see what her reply is going to be (she can’t remember when the last time was someone cared so much).

“I didn’t know either, Neji-san.” Sakura mutters, using his given name. “That your voice could sound so gentle.”

He stills and his eyes widen slightly. Shino’s posture relaxes.

How is he supposed to take care of a child? Granted, the kid’s training to be a shinobi–there comes a certain amount of independence with that.

But that especially is the reason that child needs a good caretaker.

He scoffs, thoughts swirling back to Haruno Mebuki.

How did he not notice earlier?

That girl's almost non-existent self-confidence should have tipped him off that there was something but he blamed everything on Hatake. Kakashi was terrible but even he couldn’t completely ruin someone’s feelings of self-worth like that, right?

That is it though. Genma knows he is bad at this but he can’t be worse than Hatake Kakashi out of all people.

He comes to halt in front of the room where she’s residing in. He can feel the chakra signatures of the Aburame brat and the Hyuuga brat as well. He isn’t surprised by that. Neither of them seemed like they could leave her alone after the whole breakdown with Mebuki. He’s glad for that.

And then his thoughts halt.

He is glad about that.

Almost as if Sakura is his responsibility.

She isn’t. She isn’t.

…Who is he even kidding at this point?

Genma groans before opening the door and walking right in, drawing the attention of all three kids. He raises an eyebrow at the sight before him.

Sakura’s munching on some strawberries as Shino and Neji both eat some apples and grapes.

She stops, eyes wide at the sight of him. Almost as if she was certain that she’d never see him again.

Oh no.

Genma groans once more before closing the door behind him and walking closer to her. Might as well just say it at this point.

“How do you feel about having me as legal guardian?”

He doesn't know what to think about how easy it feels to ask that question. 

Chapter Text

Perhaps she's being foolish, clutching onto Shino like that.

But she must have misheard, right? This must be her imagination. She can feel her friend shift beside her and put his hand on her shoulder— oh, it’s real. Genma is really standing in the room, a serious gaze on his face.

Sakura hasn’t really thought about where she’d end up after the entire ordeal. She didn’t think there were much options. Most orphans either went to the orphanage, and the others lived alone in some apartment paid off by the village until they had a job. There wasn’t much to consider. Well, before at least.

But now…

She averts her gaze from Genma, choosing to stare at Neji instead. The boy’s shifting nervously in his seat. Right. This must be awkward for him, huh.

“You don’t have to accept, if you don’t want to,” Genma tells her. “No one is going to force you.”

She knows he’s being sincere—everything from the tone of his voice to the feel of his chakra signature tells her. 

Sakura has the choice. 

Her eyes widen upon that realization. Her mother never let her choose. It’s surprising. It’s new. It’s overwhelming. There he is, letting her choose. There he is, trusting her with a decision.

Can she take him up on it? Can she make the decision on her own? His eyes tell her that she can. She could say no and he would respect that. Genma is kind and warm and he always takes her seriously. But he doesn’t treat her like an adult with all the answers. He lets her tease him and act like a brat.

She knows what she wants to answer. 

But she’s just a tiny bit scared. What if he turns up out to be different? What if he realizes she’s an annoyance? What if—There’s too much that could backfire. So, she doesn’t know how to speak up. Doesn’t know if this is the safe option.

Sakura is too afraid. 

What would she gain from saying yes? Will things truly change? Will things remain the same? All that she has gathered by now, will it be gone once she accepts? She’s tried so hard to build everything up, even with the cold, biting presence of her mother in her life. Sakura tried her best to survive the way she is in the situation she was stuck in. What changes now? 

If she accepts Genma’s offer, will she lose all that she had before? 

Her eyes wander up to stare at him and she gulps. He’s not scary—not at all. Instead, his presence is comforting and warm. 

“You’ll be fine,” Neji’s voice interrupts her thoughts. She blinks, glancing at the other. His gaze is serious, yet in a way unlike him. There’s something else swirling in those eyes. “No matter what your choice is, you’ll be alright.” 

He’s calm. He has always seemed so calm. His voice, his words, his reassurance.

Sakura takes a breath and lets herself relax.

She’ll be fine.

Shino digs his fingers into her shoulder, not in a way that hurts, as a slight reminder.

She’ll be alright. 

“I… W-What happens if I say no?”

Genma’s gaze softens with understanding. “We’ll find another way, but rest assured, you'll be cared for.”

Even though she's anxious, at that moment, she cannot help but relax. He meant every single word.

He won't force her .

And that? That's all she ever wanted from her parents. To make her own choices. It's an overwhelming feeling.

But so, so warm.

She feels a hand on her own. It's Neji's. When she turns she comes face to face with him. He doesn't say anything but he doesn't have to. His expression alone reassures her as does the slight smell of apples that comes from him. With Shino's hand on her shoulder and Neji holding her hand, she feels secure.

Like nothing could hurt her now.

She's sure now—no matter the choice, if something happened they wouldn't abandon her.

Still trembling a bit, Sakura gazes at Gemma.

Genma with warmer eyes than any other adult. Genma, who likes to tease her but still stays past the closing time in the library when she's too invested with something.

It's then that she realizes something.

Genma is the only possible choice.

(Because he's the only adult that has gained her trust naturally.)

Ah. She looks at him, a small smile forming on her face.

For once, she believes that this decision won’t backfire on her. 

It's when she smiles that the anxious feeling of dread in him subdues. He's meant every single thing he has told her. If she didn't want him as guardian, he would make sure to find another proper option. Her comfort comes first. 

He watches as her friends quietly comfort her, and nods his head at them in his mind. She's found good ones. Ones that understand the importance of their presence in her life. Still, he's a little bit surprised to see the Hyuuga kid there. Not that it’s a bad thing. In fact, it's the opposite.

It's good that the kid's going out of his way to interact with other people.

"Alright."

It's so quiet that he almost believes he's heard wrong. But then she continues.

"I t-think it'll be fine," Sakura mutters, clutching Hyuuga's hand, "if you b-become my legal g-guardian."

Genma's eyes widen slightly. He gazes at her and finds no doubt in her eyes.

His eyes soften as he walks closer to her, stopping in front of the bed. Neji shuffles to the side, allowing him to step closer to her bedside. He kneels down so he can gaze directly into her eyes.

“I might make mistakes,” he admits to her. He wants her to know. “I’ve never been a parent before. There are things about raising someone that I don’t know. There probably will be times where you have to call me out for it.”

"But I will learn," Genma promises her, letting his sincerity be heard. “So, thank you for giving me a chance.” 

Genma won’t let this chance go to waste. He will learn as much as he can. He will try to raise her healthily and he’ll make sure she’ll be happy from now on. That she will come home without having to fear being at home. 

But more than anything else, he has decided that he will be honest.

And by Sakura’s warm smile, Genma knows this is the right choice.

Chapter Text

They keep her in the hospital for a few days longer.

It’s not because of her injuries—Tsunade healed the bruises around her neck with the ease of a professional. No, it’s to keep an eye on her. Shizune reassured her that it wasn’t anything serious or negative, everyone just wanted to give her some time to process the whole confrontation with her mother. To let her get used to her new reality. 

Also, Genma apparently needed to deep-clean his apartment or something.

(“That man is secretly a housewife,” Shizune told her with a grin, “He’s probably trying to make sure everything is in place and as clean as possible for your arrival.” 

Then she shook her head with a small sigh, and whispered under her breath, “And to kick out his friends, if they try to sneak in again.” 

Sakura pretended not to hear that last part.

Although she’s really, really curious about what kind of friends break into one’s home. Or are all shinobi just like that? If one has the skills, after all…)

Sakura glances at the door, a small smile forms on her face for a moment and then it disappears again. Before the person has the chance to knock on the door, she calls out, “You can come in, Neji-san.”

The chakra signature spikes—a sure sign of confusion. Sakura finds she likes the way it feels. Caught off guard and surprised. It’s kind of fun. One moment later, the door opens and the Hyuuga enters the room. After he closes the door, he walks closer to the bed she rests on, taking place on the chair standing beside it.

He takes a few seconds to stare at her. It’s something he does a lot, she realized recently. Not just her. At everyone that he doesn’t seem to be able to comprehend… and well, that’s almost everyone that’s decent to him. He stares the same way at Shino, who has decided to tone down his dislike for the other. At Genma, who pats his shoulder and smirks at him. At Shizune and Tsunade, who treat him politely with warmth behind their words.

In a way, she comes to understand, they are a bit similar in that sense. Sakura doesn’t think comparing Neji and herself would be smart—in the end, their situations are still vastly different and they have developed very varied due to that. But sometimes, when he stares like that, when he’s so caught off guard that he doesn’t know how to react, when he struggles to form sentences—words—that are sincere, she can’t help but relate. 

He’s been stopping by every single day since she’s been admitted. Some would find it strange—she did too, at first—but he seems determined to visit her. To talk and interact with her. She doesn’t quite know why, but she can tell it’s important to him. He stops by every day, often with fruits or sweets, and stays for a few hours to talk. 

And the more time she spends in his presence, the more she starts to think about his sudden presence in her life, about how he behaves, about what he says.

About what he has said.

The Chunin Selection Exams. 

As she observes him, as he observes her back, she’s reminded of his speech from back then. The one during his match against Naruto. 

Now, Sakura… has her own fair share of experiences with Konoha’s system. No matter how much people like to butter up the village as friendly and kind, it’s hard to ignore the signs if you look properly. Sakura has always been fascinated with the inner workings of the village, with the systems and how everything settles into place to make things work . From the civilian side to the shinobi side of the village, Sakura has always been curious about it all. It’s like a puzzle to her: the whole picture can only be appreciated, if every little piece is in its place. 

And well, if you spend a lot of time observing something, you’ll find out a lot. Like the fact that despite the subpar security that Konoha should have, with the presence of Anbu everywhere, there are quite a lot of things that seem to slip through. Her own case would probably be a proper example but she really doesn’t want to think about the details of that just yet.

(Doesn’t want to acknowledge just why it’s taken years for anyone to notice something off about her whole situation, regardless if she wanted it to happen or not.)

So, she’s aware that not everything runs as smoothly as it should and not everything is as good as it seems, and yet… she hasn’t really processed Neji’s words from back then properly.

It’s not that Sakura was completely unaware of that cursed seal. Whilst she couldn’t fish out the details of how it worked and neither could she figure out how widespread in the clan it actually was, she heard of it before from the rumor-mill. If you dig deep enough, you’ll find a lot of things you aren’t necessarily looking for, after all. That said, she never found out enough to see the whole picture.

And then his speech happened and there was so much going on that she just couldn’t process properly—she ended up shoving it to the back, forgetting all about it. 

Until now, that is.

With too much time on her hands and trying to figure out where her interactions with Neji are going to lead to, she’s giving his words a lot more thought. Predetermined fate? Admittedly, she is still not sure what to think about that part of the speech. She’s never given fate too much thought. Until Team 7, then she started to wonder if they were just fated to fall apart the moment they were made.

(Yes, they were.)

But the seal he showcased in the arena. His words about the main and side branch. They linger in her mind.

Sakura knows things often fall through in Konoha and that not everything is as sunny as it seems. However, the Hyuuga side branch is essentially being enslaved. Isn’t that literally the case? There’s no sugarcoating it. 

It leaves her with something bitter and cold settling in the pits of her stomach.

(If she knows about the seals then the higher-ranked shinobi definitely do as well. And isn’t that the biggest sign that something is inherently off about the village’s system?)

“... Are you alright, Haru—Sakura-san?”

Torn from her thoughts, she focuses her attention back onto the boy sitting at her bedside. 

“I’m fine, Neji-san. There’s just a lot to think about.”

It’s best that she doesn’t bring anything up now. They aren’t close enough yet and running her mouth could do more damage than help at the moment. 

Neji is careful and quiet. She wouldn’t call him thoughtful like Shino, no, he seems a bit more… direct, so to say. However, Sakura understands that he’s going through changes himself. His battle with Naruto obviously did something to him, stirred up some part of him that might have been buried beneath every obligation he’s carrying. The former him, the one from the exam, would never have wasted his time visiting her. So, something is shifting within him.

And despite that, he’s still here.

Whatever change he is facing, it’s clear he decided to continue building up on whatever they are currently trying to achieve through their interactions. He keeps on visiting and although he might not be very good at conversations, he… isn’t like Sasuke . He tries to talk. He doesn’t do it much but it’s obvious that he wants to talk at least a bit for whatever reason. Admittedly, it’s a lot easier when Shino is around. Despite probably being the one that seems to want to talk the least out of all of them, he is incredibly good at reading them. Good enough to coax Neji out of his self-imposed awkwardness and to get Sakura to feel comfortable enough to speak. 

But Shino isn’t there this day; It’s just Neji and her. 

“Neji-san, is there a reason for your visits? Uhm, I’m not trying to be rude and I appreciate your presence, but… I’m confused?”

It’s silent for a while and she wonders if she overstepped a line she wasn’t aware of, but then he speaks up.

“I’m not sure either,” Neji admits. “Recently, I have been getting curious about the people around me. That includes Aburame-san and you.” 

Sakura blinks.

He sighs. “I just feel like my view has been narrow-sighted. I can’t really explain it, but it’s bothering me because… Uzumaki’s words are affecting me in ways I cannot comprehend.”

Huh. He’s making Naruto sound like a siren from those old fairy tales. 

“You’re trying to widen your perspective then,” she concludes.

He nods. “I wasn’t sure where to start or what even to do, but then everything progressed so abruptly, and now I’m here.” 

She can tell that he’s disgruntled. It makes sense. Neji doesn’t seem like a person that likes to go with the flow, but that’s essentially what happened to him. But he’s obviously putting effort in and Sakura does think that’s commendable. 

Maybe it’s alright to reciprocate the effort, in that case.

“Neji-san,” she mutters, sorting her thoughts,”did you know that your chakra signature smells like petrichor and cinnamon? It’s quite an interesting scent…”

“Huh?”

She looks up to an expression of confusion.

“I know you never listen to me,” Genma says when he approaches the other, “But I’ve got to ask anyway. How about giving the Yamanakas a visit?” 

As expected, the other doesn’t bother with a response and just keeps staring ahead at the memorial. Genma sighs, shaking his head.

“You really are a mess,” he mutters, coming to a halt beside the other shinobi. “Aren’t you tired of living like this?”

“I’m not bothered by it,” Kakashi finally replies. 

Genma almost scoffs. That’s a bad lie. Still, he’s always been able to read Kakashi just a bit more than the average person—it’s not difficult to him, not when at his core, Kakashi is just a really simple person. The ones that can’t grasp him are the people who have no understanding of mental health or truly believe Kakashi is some tool without feelings. It’s downright pathetic how most people really just don’t seem to grasp the issue at the hand. 

He lifts his hand and places it on the other’s shoulder, squeezing slightly. 

“Every sane person with some brain cells left knew that Team 7 was a terrible idea,” he states, observing as the other refuses to move his gaze from the memorial. “We all saw the fallout coming. It would have taken a lot to fix that mess of a team and there is just simply no way you could have shaped up fast enough to fix it.”

Kakashi just isn’t in the right mind space to look after kids, no matter if the kids were to become trained assassins or not. 

“What is done is done, Kakashi. There is no fixing the past.”

He can feel the slight trembling under his hand. 

“However, there is still the future. Don’t you think you owe it to her to at least try to get better?”

Genma ignores the following flinch. 

“Sakura’s abuse is one of many examples of Konoha’s absolute garbage of a security system. Just how many Anbu have looked the other way, ignoring what was going on?”

“...”

“I know you’re not the same as those idiots, but if you continue on like this, surely you’ll get there eventually. Just think about that.”

Kakashi still doesn’t gaze away from the memorial. With another sigh, Genma turns to leave. A few steps into his walk, he remembers something.

“Oh right, I already told most of the others,” he starts turning to face the other’s back. “But use the door and ring the bell if you want to come over in the future. Otherwise, you might end up spooking poor Sakura.”

And for the first time since he’s gotten there, Kakashi glances away from the memorial to stare at him, eyes slightly wide.

Genma just waves a hand at him and then leaves. “See ya.”