Work Text:
Dan’s trying. He got that middle of the night motivation where he figured everything that feels shitty in his life just needs to be solved with him barreling forward with this new-found energy. It’s not gonna last. It never does. He’ll have another cry and spiral and days where he does shit all soon. But until then, he’s gonna ride this wave.
So he actually gets out of bed when his phone alarm goes off. Phil groans, but he’s back asleep by the time Dan slips into his shower. He straightens his hair and borrows a pair of Phil’s jeans and is ready to actually attend a lecture for the first time in a shameful amount of days… weeks… look, he’s going now okay.
There’s a moment where he second guesses himself. It’s the moment he looks out the window and sees Manchester’s sky is cold and grey, but Phil’s bed is so warm and inviting. Maybe that’s why uni rooms are so specifically prison-like, Dan figures. Easier to convince yourself to go to class when the question is leave your plain concrete walls and cot mattress, compared to leaving Phil’s tiny flat with a messy kitchen and soft sheets and a snoring boyfriend.
Dan really wants to throw his hands up and decide this kick of motivation doesn’t mean anything. He’s been ignoring his schoolwork, he’s been ignoring the advice that tells him not to give into those sunken despair pits quite so often as he does… why not just ignore the urge to get his shit together like he has been?
It feels bad. But it also feels a little good. Like scratching a bug bite til it bleeds.
Another alarm goes off on his phone. The one that accounts for how much longer it takes to get to class from Phil’s place.
It’s enough to shake him from the potential spiral, for now.
He leans over Phil and gives him a quick kiss. Phil hums and Dan thinks he’ll feel the ghost of his goodbye at least. And he’ll be back later tonight to give a better one.