Work Text:
I knew that there was something different, but I did not understand what the difference was.
Arriving at Garreg Mach for the first time in five years with Father and the Knights of Seiros, we saw that Professor Byleth was alive, as was Dimitri. The students who had originated in the Blue Lions were all there as well.
Except...Dedue was not there.
It was not long after our arrival that I learned that when we had all thought Dimitri had been executed, Dedue had saved him and was executed in his place. Dedue was dead. I knew that I should have felt sadness in my heart. The students who had originated in the Blue Lions were devastated by this news. Even Felix, though he had acted like he didn’t care, had pain in his eyes.
But I was not sad. I did not shed tears. I felt no feelings of sadness.
It was because I had a...sensing feeling inside of me. I so desperately wanted to express it to everyone, but it hadn’t seemed appropriate to mentioned it. I kept it to myself until the War Table had ended, and I followed Father up to his office. Father was quite pleased to be back in the familiar place, and I was quite surprised to see everything as it was when Father had left it.
”I am not encouraged by Dimitri’s demeanor,” Father said as he began piling loose pages into neat piles onto his desk. “However, Professor Byleth’s return to us is nothing short of miraculous. With her here with us, we will surely find Lady Rhea now.”
”Brother?” I blurted out, wringing my hands slightly. Even though we were in privacy, we could not risk our identities being found out.
”What is it, Flayn?” Father looked up at me.
”I do not believe Dedue is dead.”
He gave me a puzzled look. “That...is quite a random observation. Why do you believe so?”
”I can not describe it,” I said. “But I have a feeling that he is still alive. I believe that if he was dead I would feel his...loss.” It was the only word I could come up with.
”It is good of you to have faith, but Dimitri believes most strongly that he is dead. Dimitri was the last person who saw Dedue, so if Dimitri of all people believes him dead then we cannot doubt him.”
”He is alive,” I insisted. “I just know that he is alive. I still have many recipes that I need to learn from him.”
”Ah, so there is the motive for your faith.” Father shook his head though he managed a smile. “Do not dwell on Dedue’s fate, Flayn. There are other things we need to attend to. And please, do not tell Dimitri what you have told me. Given his current mental state, I do not trust his reactions to your speculations and I do not want to have to hurt him either.”
”Yes, Father.”
I kept to my word and told not another person what I believed in my heart. Dimitri sank further into the darkness, and even Professor Byleth struggled to stay afloat and keep everyone afloat while morale was so low. But every now and then, the thought slithered back into my mind.
Dedue is alive.
It was a thought that had strangely given me comfort. It was also like a hidden secret that I was keeping from everyone. I had been tempted many times to tell Professor Byleth what I felt, but I rememberd my promise to Father and kept it to myself.
Then...two moons after we reunited. We had stormed the Great Bridge of Myrddin and were fighting Imperial Forces, and even Alliance Forces that had allied with the Empire.
“Your Highness! Apologies for the late arrival!”
The fighting paused all but temporarily, and I had heard several people on the Kingdom side cry out in shock as Dedue suddenly appeared behind us, clad in full heavy armor.
”Dedue...You’re alive...How?!” Dimitri sputtered out. Even with the darkness etched into his face and mind, he sounded astonished and absolutely relieved.
“We can discuss it later,” Dedue responded, his tone his usual calm and stoic. “For now, allow me to join your forces.”
I realized that I was grinning widely and I looked away. I spotted Father, but instead of looking at Dedue he was looking at me with wide eyes and a slack-jawed expression. Seeing Father look so shocked caused me to giggle, but I covered it up as people turned to look at me. But I could not help feeling triumphant and vindicated as Dedue advanced with our forces. When he got close to me I reached out and gently grabbed him by his forearm. He paused, and looked surprised to see. I could not hide my glee or pride as I smiled up at him.
“I knew that you were still alive.”
28th of the Verdant Rain Moon, Imperial Year 1186
“I am so sorry!” I cried out breathlessly as I raced into the Cardinal’s Room. I paused on the threshold and leaned, my hands on my knees as I struggled for breath. “I slept quite late this morning! Please tell me that I have not missed the meeting!”
”You have missed the meeting, Flayn,” Father said briskly. He was standing behind his chair at the table. Other than Professor Manuela Casablanca, who was standing at the head of the table, the Cardinal’s Room was otherwise empty.
I groaned in anguished and waved my arms in frustration. “Why did you not check up on me, Brother?! I very much wanted to be present for the War Council today!”
”It was actually nothing more than a recap of topics already discussed this week,” Father said, though his tone was hardly reassuring. “We were not here long; one of our scouts had arrived with a report that bandits were spotted in the Outskirts. Professor Byleth assembled a team and headed out to take care of them.”
”But I could have joined them!” I protested to him. “Brother, I am not a child! Please do not spoil me and allow me to sleep in like this!”
”You need not have worried, Flayn. The Professor only took former students of the Black Eagles House with her. Those individuals in particular have been increasingly tense about our march in two days. The Professor was undoubtedly seeking to get them out of the Monastery for a few hours and keep their minds occupied with a task.”
Knowing this did help make me feel a little better, but I was still disappointed that I missed the meeting anyway.
“If you would like Flayn, there are still group tasks available,” Father offered. “Marianne and Hapi have Stable Duty, Ingrid and Cyril have Sky Watch, and Dimitri and Dedue are Clearing Rubble—”
”Oh yes, I will help Dedue and Dimitri!” I said excitedly. “I will assist them in clearing away the rubble!”
Father looked surprised by my decision and coughed discreetly. “Flayn, Clearing Rubble doesn’t quite match your skill set. As a Holy Knight, don’t you think Stable Duty would better su—”
”I do not think there is anything wrong with Cleaning Rubble!” I was deeply offended at Father’s suggestion that Clearing Rubble was not the best job for me. I did not hide the displeasure from my voice. “I have participated in this group task before without issue!”
”There is nothing wrong with Clearing Rubble, but please recall that the other times you were assigned this task I took on your workload.”
”If you will recall Brother, you insisted in those cases that I not needed to bother with the task! Do not accuse me of being unfit for this work when you have prevented me from doing the work!”
Professor Manuela laughed to herself on the other side of the room, and Father flushed with embarrassment. His brow knitted, as it always did when he was irritated, and he pinched the bridge of his nose. He sighed heavily before he answered me. “If you must insist Flayn, then you may go and help Dimitri and Dedue. They were sent to the Fishing Pond to clear away the rubble there.”
”Th—”
”But if I hear that you did not help them, or if you added to their burdens, then you will not be assigned to group tasks ever again,” Father told me sharply.
I made a face at him. “Brother, we march on Enbarr in two days! There will be no need for group tasks because the war will be over by the end of the week!”
Manuela laughed louder and harder now, collapsing into a chair. Father glared at her with fury, but he did not glare at me. “You have your task. You may go now.”
I was in an exceptionally good mood as I skipped my way towards the Fishing Pond. I heard a commotion coming from the Dining Hall. So many loud conversations; I almost stopped to go inside and see what was going on. But then I spotted Dedue and Dimitri cleaning away some rubble near the scaffolding and headed straight over to them. “Dedue! Dimitri! How wonderful to see you both!”
”Oh, good morning Flayn,” Dimitri looked up and smiled as he greeted me. Even now it was hard to believe that this was the same man who just four moons prior was filled with hate and bloodlust. His face now was calm, his eye held clarity, and his smile was friendly and eager. I will never be able to thank Professor Byleth enough for saving him.
“Good morning,” Dedue greeted over his shoulder. “You look rested.”
”I am very rested!” I announced, pumping my fists. “So much so that I will be assisting you both with clearing this rubble!”
Both of them looked quite surprised with my announcement, and I was concerned that they would find an excuse to refuse me. After a moment though they exchanged a look...and nodded to each other. “We’ll be happy for the extra help, Flayn,” Dimitri said.
”We’ve cleared away some of the heavier rubble already,” Dedue said. He gestured to a pile to his left. “You can start there.”
”Yes! I will most certainly start there!” I rolled up my sleeves and knelt down beside Dedue. As I reached for a rock a pair of gloves crossed my vision. I glanced towards Dedue and he nodded to me. “This is one of my pairs so they may be large on your hands, but the rubble is rough. These should help prevent you from cutting your hands.”
Something...I could not articulate into words the surge of emotions I felt at his care towards me. I was so moved that I felt tears sting my eyes as I accepted the gloves. “You have my most sincerest thanks.”
Dedue responded with a small smile to match his natural stoicism. It was a simple gesture and yet I felt my heart skip a beat, if just for a moment. I turned to my pile and began sorting the rubble. “Where is it that were are moving this rubble?”
”The wagon at the bottom of the stairs,” Dedue said. “If you have any issues carrying the larger rocks just let me know. We can carry them down the stairs together. Make sure that when you do any lifting that you lift with your knees and not your back.”
”I will. Oh, I am going to greatly enjoy this exercise!” I picked up a reasonably sized rock and carried it down to the wagon at the bottom of the stairs. When I went back up the stairs, I noticed that the commotion in the Dining Hall abruptly got louder.
”What on earth is going on?” Dimitri said, slowly standing up. He looked towards Dedue and then me. “Please excuse me, I’m going to go check what’s causing this disturbance.”
”We will be right here, Your Highness,” Dedue told him. Dimitri headed towards the Dining Hall as I returned to Dedue’s side. He stood up, holding a piece of rubble three times the size of his own head with little effort. “Hold on,” he said when I reached for a piece of rubble. “That one has considerable weight. When I come back up I will help you carry it.”
I flushed with embarrassment and was mildly irritated by his assessment. The rubble that he told me not to pick up was nowhere near the size of the piece he was currently holding in his arms. I frowned up at him. “I believed that I will be all right.”
”That piece is heavy,” he told me. “I would like to help you carry. I will be right back, I promise.” Then he turned and descended the stairs.
I glared down at the piece of rubble. How can he think that this is too much for me? Why, this piece looks barely 30 centimeters in diameter!
I was undeterred, and reached for the offending rock in question. I stood up and began lifting—oh. Oh, this rock was quite heavy. Much heavier than I had perceived it to be. But I was encouraged when I was able to lift the rock just a little off the pile. Yes, I can do this! I am going down a flight of stairs so the momentum should not be too much for me!
Oh, but the rock was quite stubborn and did not want to move. I lifted with all of my might but I could barely remove it from the rubble. I felt my knees start to tremble, but I was not about to quit. With a snarl I used all of my strength to lift the rock. I succeeded in hoisting the rock off and into my arms, but I lost my balance and stumbled backwards, slamming my back into one of the support beams for the scaffolding!
I heard a shout and felt the entire scaffold shake, and I looked up in time to see a large sack fall from the top of the scaffolding towards me. I had no time to react, only to have a split moment to realize that the sack was going to fall straight on top of my head—and that it was big enough to crush me.
”Oof!” I grunted as I was suddenly grabbed and shoved aside. I was pushed out of the path of the sack and my vision was obstructed by a wall of silver. I heard the sack one of the rubble piles and tear open, its content spilling all over the ground. I was stunned in the moment and could not think nor react. As I came back into myself, I realized that arms were holding me and my face was pressed against silver metal.
I...I felt safe.
”Are you all right, Flayn?”
My heart unexpectedly started pounding rapidly. I leaned back and looked up. Dedue stared back at me, his expression unmoving but there was concern in his eyes. He did not look angry with me for disregarding his warnings, but he looked scared. “Are you hurt?” He asked me calmly. “Did you get hit by anything that fell off the scaffolding, Flayn?”
I stared back at him wide-eyed. Emotions that I could not define flourished inside of me. I was breathless, light-headed...I could not explain why I felt these things, and whether or not they were due to nearly being crushed by the sack.
But...But I knew that these emotions only increased in intensity the longer I stared at Dedue.
“Cethleann.”
Dedue’s brow twitched and he did just a slight double-take. Horror filled my body as I realized what just happened. O-Oh no!
“What did you say?” He asked me, keeping his voice low.
My eyes darted around, and was thankful that despite the commotion that I had caused by falling into the scaffolding no one had come to check up on us. I looked back at Dedue, and realized that I could not take back what I had blurted out. He had heard me, loud and clear.
I am sorry, Father. I am so sorry for being so careless!
”Cethleann,” I confessed quietly, tears stinging my eyes. “That is my real name.”
I knew that this revelation must have surprised Dedue, but there was no change to his expression, other than his eyes widening ever so slightly. Before he could speak though, Dimitri hurried out from the Dining Hall towards us. “Dedue, Flayn! You’ll surely want to see this, come here!”
I was glad for the interruption, and Dedue seemed to be glad as well. I started to stand up but he took me by the hand gently and helped me up. I was quite surprised to see how his giant hand swallowed my much smaller one. Dimitri waved us towards the Dining Hall and we followed him inside.
The Head Chef and several cooks were talking loudly amongst themselves. Behind the counter I saw dozens of white sacks lined up from the counter to the back wall. There were brown smudges on the bag, but there were some words that were sewn onto the front of the bags. “Cacao? Chocolate?”
”It’s dirt,” the Head Chef supplied. She looked absolutely infuriated. “We got this massive shipment this morning—imported through Almyra. It was marked as a perishable, but these sacks are full of brown dirt!”
One of the sacks was open in front of the counter, and it did indeed look like it was filled with brown dirt. “Here is what’s bizarre,” Dimitri told us. “This dirt has a sweet scent. I don’t know what kind of dirt they have in Alymra, but someone took the time to fill thirty sacks full of sweet-smelling dirt to send to us!”
”We have no room in our stores for this,” the Head Chef fumed. “What a burden to happen when the Army is marching in two days!”
I was quite curious about the sweet-smelling dirt named chocolate. I leaned in close to the sack and had a whiff. I involuntarily squealed and looked up at Dimitri and Dedue. “This—This smell is absolutely wonderful. This scent is making my mouth water! Something that smells so delicious cannot be a threat or a joke to us! This must be something that we can eat!”
”Eating dirt?” Dimitri laughed, shaking his head. “I do not think that is a good idea.”
”Nor is eating weeds,” Dedue murmured.
”No, this must be harmless! I will prove that it is harmless!” I pulled off one glove, reached into the sack and pulled out a clump between two fingers. People around me shouted with fright, but I paid them no heed and popped the clump into my mouth.
Everyone was frozen around me, watching with horror in their eyes. Whereas I...I was melting.
”I-It is delicious!” I cried out, throwing my hands up into the air. “It has a creamy texture, and it melted in my mouth! It is so sweet, like it was mixed with sugar cane! And—oh, I am need of something to drink!”
”Seteth is going to kill us,” I heard someone mutter. I paid them no attention.
”Here, I will try it as well,” Dedue said, reaching behind the counter and retrieving a spoon. He stuck it into the bag and came out with a large spoonful. He put it into his mouth—and prompting began gagging.
”Dedue!” Dimitri shouted with alarm, grabbing his arm. “Are you all right?!”
Dedue could not speak for a few minutes, and his red began to turn red as he coughed hard. His reaction to the chocolate frightened me, and I hurried to his side. “De—” I found that my tongue was stuck to the roof of my mouth as I still had lingering chocolates. “Mmm!” I stuck my fingers in my mouth to try to clear away the delicious treat. Unfortunately it only made me realize that I was thirsty and I began coughing.
“Here!” The Head Chef shoved cups of water into our hands. “Rinse out your mouths!”
I gulped the water straight down, and the taste of the water with the chocolate was grotesque. Dedue drank his entire cup down in one gulp and gasped for breath. “That...” I gasped. “That chocolate was so sticky!”
”And sweet,” Dedue said. Dimitri handed him a napkin and he wiped his mouth. “I dislike sweets, and that was very sweet. This is not dirt.”
”You are certain?” the Head Chef asked.
Dedue nodded. “The texture does not match dirt. This was more reminiscent of baking powder. This is indeed a perishable.”
”Well, that is a relief,” Dimitri said, letting out his breath. “If it is good, then we should be able to get some enjoyment out of it.”
”But so much of it was shipped to us,” the Head Chef said. “What are we going to do with this?”
”It appears to be a confectionary—” Dedue began, but I interrupted him. “Oh, can we try turning it into a sauce and drizzling it over Teutates Loach?”
“That sounds quite creative,” Dimitri said, but Dedue looked wary. “This chocolate is quite sweet. Teutates Loach is savory. Sweet and savory can work together, but my concern is that chocolate may be too sweet for Loach.”
”Well, we might as well try it,” the Head Chef said, throwing up her hands. “If it doesn’t work, we’ll just make cakes out of it.”
”Let’s have a hearty lunch and finish our group task,” Dimitri said.
“I am quite excited by this!” I cheered.
I could not hide my disappointment and rubbed my aching stomach as I descended the stairs in front of the Fishing Pond. “What a travesty. To think that two delicious delicacies such as Teutates Loach and chocolate could produce such an...inedible mess!”
“It was certainly...a clash of flavors,” Dedue said.
”I thought the dish was fine,” Dimitri said positively. “It was a fitting filling meal to complement our hard work today. Once the Professor comes back, we can—”
”Oh, Dimitri!” We stopped as the Gatekeeper raced over to them. “The Professor was just looking for you! She just came back from defeating those bandits and—”
”I will be right there,” Dimitri said with much haste. He looked at Dedue. “I’ll see you later.”
Dedue nodded, although I saw the hint of a small smile on his face. “Take care.”
We watched Dimitri depart for the Marketplace with the Gatekeeper and I turned to Dedue. “Then...you will take your leave then?”
Dedue glanced at me. It was a simple glance, but my heart still fluttered. “I am not in any hurry to depart. Are you?”
”Not particularly, no,” I agreed. “But I am afraid that disappointing meal ruined my enthusiasm for cooking today.”
”It did so for me as well.” Dedue looked out over the Fishing Pond. “Nobody is fishing at the moment. Shall we go and stand on the dock?”
I nodded. “I would like that.”
We headed out onto the dock and looked out over the Pond. We stood there for a long time in silence. I normally disliked silence, however I was greatly enjoying Dedue’s company. However...
”I did not thank you before, for saving me,” I said, glancing at him. “Thank you. And I apologize dearly for not listening to you about that rock.”
”There is no need to apologize,” Dedue said. “You were unhurt. That is all that matters.”
The flutter returned to my heart from his words and I felt heat on my cheeks. I decided to broach the subject from before. I took a breath and let it out slowly. “What I had said before. About my name...I...” I trailed off pitifully.
”If I am to be completely honest,” Dedue said. “I was not entirely surprised.”
I gaped at him. “W...You are serious? You knew?!”
”I did not know,” Dedue clarified. “But I had a suspicion. Your ears, your Crest, the Caduceus Staff—the fact that your birthday fell on St. Cethleann‘s Day. I am not very familiar with the Seiros religion, however I thought that these facts, and your kidnapping five years ago, were highly suspect.”
I nodded in resignation. “Well...that is who I am,” I said quietly.
”Seteth,” Dedue said. “He has the Crest of Cichol. Then—he is St. Cichol, correct?” I nodded stiffly. Dedue at his chin thoughtfully. “I remember His Highness saying though that St. Cichol and St. Cethleann were father and daughter. Then Seteth, he...” Dedue didn’t finish the sentence.
I nodded in confirmation. “It is true.”
”I see.” Dedue was silent for a long moment again before he continued. “The Seiros religion is over a thousand years old. So...then that would mean that you are over a thousand years old.”
I couldn’t find the words so I simply nodded again, squeezing my eyes shut.
”Well,” Dedue said, his tone only mildly shocked. “That is...interesting.”
I slowly sat down on the edge of the dock. “You do not know the full story. And telling would...it would take a lifetime.”
Dedue did not sit down, but I knew that it was because of the armor he was wearing. He said, “I have some free time at the moment.”
I looked at him, feeling tears sting my eyes. I felt overwhelmed, and it took a moment for me to catch my breath. “W—Would you really listen to everything? Then would you report my secrets to Dimitri?”
Dimitri flinched, but he otherwise kept his face blank. “What you have told me...they are your secrets. I understand that telling His Highness such things would be a gross invasion of your privacy. These are secrets that you have closely guarded for a millennia, and the only person hurt by these secrets has been you. It would not...displease me for you to ease your burdens and share this with me. I consider myself a decent warrior, and I already live a hazardous life. Knowing the truth about you isn’t going to change my life drastically. And—And I now believe that it will not be a danger to His Highness if I keep your secrets for you.”
I stared at him, my mouth hanging open. Emotions swirled inside of me, and the realization dawned on me so quickly that I felt my eyes widen even more.
I love you.
I was not naive to the concept of love, but in all of the years of my life I had never felt anything like this. I had not time to feel romantic love; my life had been filled with tragedy and death, and then I slept for such a long, long time...the world around me had changed so drastically that it was difficult for me to formulate my emotions.
But I knew that I had fallen in love with Dedue. He had a visage that would be scary to some people, but he was also one of the gentlest men I have ever met. I knew that this was why I knew that he was not dead when everyone else believed him to be dead. My heart had somehow connected to his, and in my heart I knew that he was alive out there. The realization of the depth of my love overcame me and I felt light-headed. I love him. Oh my goodness, I love him quite strongly. I am overcome with the desire to hug and kiss him. Oh, but he would think me strange if I did those things without warning! If he does not already think me strange with everything I have told him!
Oblivious, Dedue held out a hand to me. ”You look faint, Flayn. Let me take you back to your room. I will not pressure you to tell me anything. If you feel like talking, then I will be available.”
I accepted his hand greatly, and admittedly my knees felt wobbly. “You can lean on me,” he offered, putting an arm around me. Oh, to feel his arm around me was quite overwhelming in the moment. I glanced up towards him but my eyes locked onto his scarred mouth. I want to kiss him. It is shameful to think this way, but the more I think about it the greater my desire builds. I want to kiss him terribly!
He guided me towards the stairs in front of the Greenhouse. We ascended three steps when I grabbed Dedue’s hand on my shoulder. “Please stop,” I said quietly.
”Are you all right?” he asked me.
My face was red and my legs still felt weak, but I climbed the stairs ahead of him. I ducked my head as I reached a step that would make me on equal height to him. My fists clenched at my sides. “You...You are a wonderful man, Chef Dedue.”
”I do not think myself wonderful, but thank you for the compliment,” Dedue said. “I am actually in greater awe of you, if for nothing else than the fact that you can maintain a positive demeanor in the face of all of the hardships you have faced.”
I did not give him warning. I turned around leaned down to kiss him on the mouth, my eyes squeezed shut. I felt him stiffen and shift in shock, but...but he did not push me away. His mouth surprisingly felt soft against mine despite the scars, and after a moment I felt pressure against my own lips. He...He’s kissing me back!
When we parted, I opened my eyes to meet his gaze. It was then that I saw a slash of silver-blue at Dedue’s back. I screamed and grabbed his arm, taking him by surprise enough that I was able to pull him forward and out of the way of the attack. But Dedue lost his balance and he fell forward on top of me. His hands reached and slammed onto the stairs on either side of my head before his fully armored body crushed mine.
”Get away from him, Flayn.”
A feeling of dread sank into my stomach, but the rage surged inside me. I maneuvered out from underneath Dedue and took a protective stance in front of him. “Brother!” I screamed. “Just what is it that you think you are doing?!”
”I could ask you the same thing.” Father’s voice was low and cold, but his face was red and turning purple with rage. He held the Spear of Assal in both hands, and I knew that he had swung it at Dedue. “What is it that you were doing just now?”
I looked at Dedue over my shoulder, as he was slow to get to his feet. “Are you hurt? Did he hurt you?”
”I am not maimed,” Dedue told me sagely, though he was looking at Father warily.
”If you want to keep your life, then you will heed my warning and never do that again!” Father snapped, raising his voice. A considerable crowd had quickly formed behind him, and I was relieved that Professor Byleth was not amongst the faces. “Flayn!” Father snapped, getting my attention. “Come to me right now!”
”No!” I snapped. I reached back and grabbed Dedue by his hand. “How dare you attack him when he has done nothing to warrant such a cowardly attack!” How DARE you attack the man that I love, Father! I seethed on the inside.
”Flayn, that man is acting inappropriately towards you!” Father shouted. He advanced towards us but I kept myself between him and Dedue, my arms spread out to protect him. “I will not stand by while a perverted lech takes advantage of you!”
”He is not taking advantage of me!” I shouted back at him. “It was I who initiated the kiss! I wanted to kiss him and so I kissed him!”
Father’s face turned darker red. “Flayn...you kissed him? Am I hearing this correctly?”
”Um—” Dedue said behind me.
”I most certainly kissed him!” I confirmed. “It was something that I had wanted to do, deep in my heart, and so I did it! And you know what, Brother? I liked kissing him! Kissing Dedue Molinaro filled my heart with joy!”
”...It did?” Dedue asked him. I could hear the shock in his voice.
”I would not say it if I did not mean it,” I responded, looking at Dedue over my shoulder. “If I could kiss you a hundred—nay, a thousand—nay! A million times! It would never be enough kisses for me!”
Dedue blushed at my proclamation, and he looked astonished. “Did it please you to kiss me?” I asked, my tone uncertain.
”I...er...” Dedue hid his face with his hand in embarrassment. “O...Of course it did...”
I heard people around us gossiping loudly and I turned back to face Father. Father looked both shocked and still very angry. “...Flayn,” he said at length, his tone low and angry again. “This...This is very selfish of you. Do you not know what you are doing?”
”He knows, Brother,” I said impulsively, but immediately regretted it.
”What?!” Father exploded, startling several people nearby. “You told him, Flayn?! What have you done?!”
”What is the meaning of this?!” The crowd immediately parted as Dimitri made his way back over to us. He paused and gaped at the scene before him; Father holding a Sacred Weapon threateningly, and me standing in front of Dedue protectively. But Dimitri recovered quickly and moved to stand between all of us. “We’re going to Seteth’s Office,” he said tersely. “Now.”
I expected Professor Byleth to join us, but Dimitri had explained that the Professor’s group had been ambushed by over twenty bandits in the Outskirts. There were no fatalities or serious injuries on our side, but the Professor had arrived back at Garreg Mach fatigued from the skirmish. Dimitri had said she had given her debrief to him and had quickly retired to her chambers. Only Linhardt retired quicker than she had.
I was concerned that Dedue would tell Dimitri the truth about me, but the main thing Dimitri seemed most concerned about was that Father had attacked Dedue unprovoked.
”I apologize for attacking you Dedue,” Father said heatedly. But he immediately turned to Dimitri. “But he participated in a—a lewd act with my sister! I could not help but react!”
”I would say that swinging a Sacred Weapon at someone’s back, in a peaceful environment, was an excessive reaction,” Dimitri told him. His features were more relaxed but I could see that he was upset. He was surely not angrier than I was, though. “We march in two days Seteth so I have bigger things to worry about, but I cannot let this slide.”
”Your Highness,” Dedue said, stepping forward. “Please do not be upset with him. We have known Seteth for a long time. Long enough to know that this outburst from him is incredibly out of character, and not likely to repeat again.”
”If your can refrain from having relations with Flayn—” Father began.
”Brother, stop it right now!” I interjected. “I am not a child any longer! I have not been a child for a long time! I am not unknowing of feelings of the heart!” I turned to Dedue and swept down to one knee. “Dedue Molinaro! I most humbly ask you to be in a relationship with me!”
Dedue, Dimitri, and Father stared at me wide-eyed, but I kept my eyes determinedly on Dedue. I focused on the love blooming inside of my heart as I held my hand out to him. “I adore you. You are one of the kindest men that I have ever met. You are someone that I can unequivocally trust. If you would be in a couple with me, I swear that I will do everything that I can to make you happy! I will be all of yours if you will be all of mine, please?” I was becoming emotional from my declaration, tears stinging my eyes.
Silence filled Father’s office, and the longer it took for Dedue to answer me the more painful the silence felt. I couldn’t contain some of my tears and I scrubbed my face with my sleeves. Please, say something! If you do not love me, just tell me so!
A simple handkerchief was pressed into my hands. I looked up and saw Dedue was eye-level with me. His face was still stoic, but his eyes...
”Please forgive me,” he said. “I did not mean to make you cry.” He looked away briefly before meeting my eyes again. “I am a completely uninteresting man who is not good with words. I am also someone who has trouble continuously following him. It is something that I have to live with while in the service of His Highness, and it is something I have to live with as someone who is from Duscur.
”I realize that you have not had an easy life, and in the time that I have known you I have seen you suffer many ordeals. I cannot give you an easy life. My service belongs to His Highness, and such service requires many personal sacrifices.”
”Dedue...” I heard Dimitri say softly.
”But that is the life that I have chosen, and I would not want any other life,” Dedue said. He looked to Dimitri and then back at me. “I will not insult your intelligence by telling you that you do not understand what it will mean to be with me. I know you want to be with me despite everything that I have just said. You have...opened yourself to me in ways that you have not done for others. I am flattered—and deeply moved that you have found me worthy of your secrets.”
He took the handkerchief from me and started to wipe the tears from my face. I heard Father shift with anger, but I also heard Dimitri move to step in front of him.
“I want you to understand the...joy I feel from your presence,” Dedue said. I could tell by his expression that it was difficult for him to tell me this. “I have been judged for my entire life for events beyond my control. You have never shown me contempt or judgment. You radiate positive energy that is infectious. It is something that I...adore about you.” He flushed. “If—If you find me worthy to be your companion, then I would be honored to have you as mine.”
The joy and love swell so quickly inside of me that I burst into tears. I wailed so loudly and suddenly that the sound startled Dedue, Father, and Dimitri. I launched forward and threw my arms around Dedue. “I am the happiest that I have ever been! I want to spend all of my eternity with you!”
”Flayn!” Father sputtered, stepping around Dimitri. “I cannot approve of this! His position in life will put your life in danger! Something that I have worked very hard to avoid! And—And you do not understand what it means to give your love so completely to someone!”
”Well, I am doing it now!” I snapped at him. I glared at Father through my tears and grabbed Dedue’s hand as we stood. “I choose Dedue, and that is final!”
Father sputtered in further rage, but Dimitri discreetly inserted himself between Father and us. “I think,” he said calmly. “That all parties should avoid each other for now until cooler heads prevail. Dedue, Flayn? I think it is best we leave.”
Father did not say anything further, but he looked so angry that my heart ached painfully. But I held onto Dedue’s hand defiantly as Dimitri directed us out of Father’s Office. He turned us towards the stairs and we headed down into the first floor of the Central Building. “Well,” Dimitri said finally. “I mean no offense, but never would I have expected this to happen so soon before our campaign.”
”I am...still processing everything that has happened,” Dedue said. His face was still flushed and he still held my hand.
”I want you to know that I am not acting in rebellion against my—brother,” I said firmly. “I want to be with you Dedue and I accept the danger that will come with being with you! I have already faced enough danger!”
”That is true,” Dimitri said. He smiled at Dedue. “ My friend, I am very happy for you.”
”...Thank you, Your Highness,” Dedue said. I felt him squeeze my hand gently.
”Well, this is quite surprising.” We looked up as Professor Manuela sauntered over to us. I saw that she was holding two bottles of alcohol in her arms. “You should be careful Flayn, lest your brother sees you so close to another man.” She chuckled softly.
”He knows,” I told her. “And I do not care.”
Maneula arched an eyebrow. She looked between Dedue and I. “Well...congratulations.” She walked past us and headed up to the second floor.
”We march in two days,” Dimitri reminded us. “But we should still take care and be rested. I will head back to my room.” He smiled and took his leave.
I looked up at Dedue and saw that his face was still flushed. I rubbed my free hand over his. ”If you would like to ask me any questions of me, I will answer them.”
Dedue looked at me. After a moment he coughed. “Would you like to go fishing?”
I giggled involuntarily, but I couldn’t help but smile. “I would greatly enjoy that.”
We walked through the Central Building. I saw people looking and pointing at us. I knew that the gossip about Father’s behavior had to have spread throughout the Monastery, but I did not care. I leaned my head against Dedue’s arm and smiled.
I will tell him everything in time. We will survive this upcoming battle, save Lady Rhea, and then we will have all of the time in the world.