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As any other usual Saturday in Bokuto’s and Akaashi’s life, they spend the evening studying at each other’s houses. It’s a routine they have built during the last year and a half, to have company while they do their own homework or study for an upcoming test. It’s also comforting to spend time together, it doesn’t matter if they’re actually too busy to be talking or not.
(Especially for Akaashi, since the boy craves Bokuto’s attention desperately.)
Like any other Saturday, both boys are together inside Akaashi’s room, doing their homework. Akaashi is helping Bokuto sometimes and Bokuto every once in a while cracks a joke to make Akaashi smile and relax. It’s how they work, and how things work between them. But tonight is different, because Akaashi’s parents are out of town to visit an aunt and it’s raining.
Scratch that, it’s pouring .
“Bokuto-san, you cannot leave like under this weather, you’ll get sick.”
“Ugh, my mom doesn’t have the car for the weekend,” he mumbles under his breath and Akaashi blinks. For so long he has wanted to invite Bokuto to stay over, for so long he has wanted to try to make a move on Bokuto. Suddenly, the chance is there – because he’s nothing but realistic, and all the signs tell him he’s right –, so Akaashi doesn’t even think twice; he seizes the opportunity.
“Stay over.”
Bokuto blinks at him from where he’s standing in front of the closed window in Akaashi’s room. Akaashi stands a few feet behind, watching him quietly.
“What?”
“You heard me, Bokuto-san. Staying over is better than getting sick. I can lend you some clothes.”
While looking back at the rain, Bokuto ponders for a moment. Akaashi crosses his hand on his back, fingers crossed, shame running through himself. He doesn’t show it, doesn’t say a word, though; it’s his chance, and he will grab it. He has seen the signs, and he knows this will work. Akaashi’s sure of it.
“I’ll call my mom, then!”
While Bokuto steps away to the kitchen to call his mother, Akaashi runs through his own closet to find the clothes that too big for him, so he can lend them to Bokuto. While he does so, he thinks about what he’s going to do now that he has managed to get Bokuto to sleep in his house – he hadn’t expected to make this far so soon. Sure, he had hoped, but not actually believed that Bokuto would say yes. And now…
Akaashi leaves the clothes folded on his bed and heads to his parents’ bedroom, looking for the futon. When he opens the closet, he sees it on the far corner and is about to grab it, but then he stops himself. Wait .
He closes the closet and walks out of there, hands empty. When he goes back to his room, Bokuto is sitting there waiting for him. “Akaashi! My mom said okay and asked me to thank you for this!!”
Akaashi nods and looks at the floor. He’s not a that much of a good liar, but he can hope. After all, hadn’t he been doing this so far and it actually worked?
“Bokuto-san, I… I couldn’t find the futon.”
He doesn’t directly avoid Bokuto’s eyes, but also avoids looking straight into them. Bokuto’s eyes widen comically, and he gets up, eyes glued to Akaashi’s face.
“Uh, I guess that’s okay Akaashi! I can sleep on the couch, no problem!”
Akaashi shakes his head. “No, Bokuto-san. My bed is big enough for both of us. We can share.”
Bokuto gulps. “Akaashi…”
“I will respect your space, Bokuto-san, don’t worry. But you shouldn’t sleep on the couch when we both fit on the bed. Your well-being matters to me.”
“Akaashi, one night on the couch won’t kill me!” he laughs nervously, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “Don’t worry about me! I’ll take the couch.”
“Bokuto-san, I guarantee you…”
“It’s okay, Akaashi, I’ll take the couch!”
“... that it’s completely fine by me…”
“Akaashi, don’t worry!”
“... and Bokuto-san, please, I am afraid of thunderstorms.”
Akaashi flushes at the ‘confession’ – one that isn’t a lie but also not the truth either. He dislikes thunderstorms, that is much true, but he isn’t afraid of them. But if this is what it takes to make Bokuto share a bed with him, then he will gladly say so.
He’ll even act if necessary.
“Oh,” Bokuto replies, smartly. Akaashi awkwardly shuffles on his own feet, Bokuto’s silence starting to stretch. “I didn’t know, Akaashi.”
He shrugs, gaze averting to the floor. “I don’t exactly tell people.”
Maybe it was Akaashi’s low voice, or how he hadn’t been meeting Bokuto’s eyes, but it made something clench inside Bokuto’s chest. The vulnerability in Akaashi’s eyes, the insecurity, the quiet request for him to say yes; all of this made Bokuto rethink on his decision, because as much as it might be awkward, he doesn’t want to see Akaashi scared. He cares for Akaashi, maybe a bit more than what’s considered normal and acceptable, but he truly does. Because of that, he doesn’t want to see him like this.
“Okay,” he says quietly, finally. “Okay, Akaashi. We can share the bed.”
Akaashi’s soft and relieved expression is the only reward Bokuto needs.
.
They eat the food that Akaashi’s mom left for them while making small conversation. Both hide their nervousness between random topics, both too scared of showing their emotions and the consequences of it. The evening drags on, the rain pouring outside with thunder loud enough even for the inside of the closed house. During a really loud one, Akaashi can’t help but shiver slightly. He really doesn’t like thunderstorms, he didn’t lie, and he hadn’t been expecting this one to be this loud.
“You okay?” Bokuto asks quietly, reaching for Akaashi’s hand. He squeezes it, a soft look on his face. Akaashi nods, not trusting his voice because oh my god Bokuto-san is holding my hand .
It’s when Bokuto realizes what he’s doing, and he lets it go just as fast as he had reached for it. “Uhm, sorry! I–I didn’t think!”
Akaashi blushes and nods, turning back to his own food. “It’s okay. It was nice.”
He doesn’t meet Bokuto’s eyes, and doesn’t look at his face, missing Bokuto’s shocked and relieved expression. Akaashi doesn’t see Bokuto’s soft face directed at him, the look of love he gives Akaashi like he gives no one else.
After they eat, they take turns to take a shower; Akaashi goes first, and then Bokuto. While Bokuto is in the bathroom, Akaashi takes the moment to organize his bed, his desk and close the entire house, just so they can sleep soon. Maybe he’s a bit too eager, but Akaashi can’t help himself – he wants to be closer to Bokuto and tonight might be his only chance.
When Bokuto is back into the room, Akaashi turns off the light, leaving only the lamp on, and they both awkwardly and silently settle on the bed. Both laying on their backs, Akaashi on the side closer to the wall, and when Bokuto turns the lamp off, they’re momentously surrounded by darkness.
It takes a few minutes, quiet ones with both boys only breathing next to each other, before their eyes adjust to the semi-darkness provided by the drawn curtain. Akaashi shuffles, rolling to his side, so he can see Bokuto’s features in the dim light. He looks nervous, staring at the ceiling, mouth in a thin line. Akaashi’s heart clench inside his chest, feeling guilty for making Bokuto uncomfortable.
“Bokuto-san,” he whispers and Bokuto stiffens even more. Akaashi feels like an idiot. “I’m sorry for this.”
Immediately, Bokuto turns his head to the side. “No, Akaashi!” he says, voice low but urgent. “I’m sorry I’m just weird, I....”
“It’s okay, Bokuto-san.”
“No! I...I don’t want it to be weird.”
“It’s not weird, but it’s okay, I’ll take the couch and…”
“No, please, Akaashi, wait!”
Silently, Akaashi waits. Bokuto continues.
“I’m sorry, Akaashi, that’s not what I mean…”
Akaashi stares at him, watching him shuffle, so he can turn and mimic Akaashi’s position. They stare at each other’s eyes, quiet for a moment, hearts racing.
“I don’t want you to be scared,” Bokuto murmurs and his hand softly traces Akaashi’s cheekbone. It’s endearing, and Akaashi wonders when did the mood change between them. He doesn’t mind it, though he isn’t sure if Bokuto is aware of it. “I keep thinking that I’d do anything to protect you.”
Gulping, Akaashi takes his hand on his face, intertwining their fingers. “Just the fact that you’re here is enough to make me feel braver, Bokuto-san.”
Bokuto smiles softly, squeezing Akaashi’s hand. There’s a beat of panic inside his head; he thinks if Bokuto realizes what this means between them, if he knows what this could possibly imply in their relationship. He glances at the joined hands briefly and then back at Akaashi’s face, face more relaxed and even more open than it has ever been. Akaashi hopes that Bokuto feels the same, that he’s just as scared as Akaashi is, but also just as willing. “Akaashi?”
“Hmm?”
“What if I say I wanna protect you forever?” he asks hesitantly, voice small and unsure. “Just like this?”
Akaashi’s breath hitches, his heart racing even more. He wonders briefly if Bokuto can feel his heartbeat under his fingers, considering how strong and fast it is right now. He stares at him and hope blooms inside his chest, a warm feeling going through his entire body. Akaashi feels fuzzy, light-headed and drunk into the feeling.
“Do you promise?” he asks, voice just as small and Bokuto kisses his knuckles. His hand is shaking, and he looks like he’s about to combust. Akaashi figures he must be in the same state, and it makes him weirdly happy to see Bokuto as nervous as he feels.
“I promise.”
Akaashi holds onto that.
.
(Weeks later, after they have had many sleepovers, in one of those they end up sharing a bed on purpose, and, in the end, when they’re sleepy, speech already slurred, Akaashi scoots closer and plants a kiss on Bokuto’s cheek. It’s sweet, but Bokuto decides it isn’t enough.
He plants a chaste kiss on Akaashi’s lips.
Slowly, they exchange lazy and sweet kisses, just touching of moving lips, not urgently or worried about anything. They fall asleep like this, intertwined, faces close and hearts reaching out.)