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The Greek myth of Achilles and Patroclus came up when, in a philosophy class, Akaashi’s class reviewed the songs of the Iliad. The teacher wrote χρυσό on the blackboard with his thin white chalk.
Χρυσό / chrysó / means golden.
"Achilles was golden," said the professor, "with a destiny drawn from before he even was conceived ."
Bokuto is golden, his eyes are golden, his heart is golden, and his joy is golden. His love for Akaashi is golden. And also he certainly has a golden future in volleyball.
"He is in the top five of the best spikers nationwide," he recalls that Kuroo told one of the Karasuno boys, and his chest was filled with pride just by hearing that, knowing that he is the one who can see those spikes that made him famous from so close .
Akaashi thinks about Bokuto's smile when the professor says that, according to some experts in Greek mythology, Achilles had a kind of golden aura. He thinks about the way Bokuto almost shines when he's jumping high, ready to hit a ball that he put in especially for his captain, to make that moment possible.
He also thinks about how Bokuto is so spontaneous and so passionate, how he is so energetic and so inspiring; thinks about all the power he puts in to save and win every match. In his incredible ingenuity, the way he always gets to make him smile, to get his attention. About him wanting his attention. And he feels as if he is also bathed in that golden aura of his just for the proximity, for all the times Bokuto touches him with such admiration, with such respect (so much that he feels he doesn't deserve it).
"He always had Patroclus by his side, his brother in arms," says the teacher to the class. Patroclus, Philatos, the most beloved.
The professor explains how Patroclus could never be compared in abilities to him, because, of course, Achilles was a demigod, and Patroclus was just a human; however, he was always by his side, like a shadow that Achilles did not want to do without.
Akaashi knows that that’s what he is for Bokuto: a companion he doesn't want to get rid of because he needs someone who is there for him and his constant needs for attention and mood swings. Akkashi knows Bokuto wants him there because he tells him that he loves him " more than anything" over and over again.
And he knows that is not true. He knows Bokuto loves so much more the way he feels on the court, shining. Flying.
"And, of course, this story is a tragedy. They got separated from each other when Hector killed Patroclus while he was wearing Achilles’ armor to join in the battle because Achilles did not want to fight anymore ."
The teacher implicitly mentioned that Patroclus was only his traveling companion, but not all love could change destiny.
The inevitable separation of lovers.
Akaashi knows the story.
And he can't help to compare himself with Patroclus, because Akaashi often feels like he doesn't deserve Bokuto.
He thinks about it all the many times he can't keep up with him in the court, not even when he tries his best. And he fears that, in the blink of an eye, Bokuto will disappear, or that someday he will wake up from that daydream that means being his, and it will suddenly be time for the graduation of the senior students. And Bokuto will go to the big leagues, so far away from him.
He fears that Bokuto following his dreams would be the Hector that separates him from the life of his Achilles.
Because he knows that when that happens, he won't be able to be there with him, he knows he will have to see him from afar while he plays with such experienced setters as Oikawa Tooru or anyone else at his level.
Akaashi knows he is not at his level, even if he tries.
And he fears that the gold aura he feels covering him is temporary, that is just the trail Bokuto leaves on him with his simple presence, with that overwhelming closeness.
He imagines Bokuto in just a few months, how he will have to watch him go away and finally wake up from that beautiful dream, how finally all the golden and precious things in his life will inevitably fade away.
The teacher ignores the tear that falls on Akaashi's cheek and stains the word χρυσό on the notebook. The ink runs on the paper.