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Hello and welcome to… Yo-Yo the Musical, where everything is named after music stuff except the things that are named after fashion stuff and food stuff. I’m your host, the epic narrator who comes in and out occasionally to tell you stuff.
First off, the first part, Fart and Love. This is the story of two guys, YoYo and Dior, who hate each other for some reason. Yoyo’s buddy uhh Fast Car says Celine Dion is evil and yoyo just kinda goes along with it. Also, YoYo has a girlfriend but this is the only time in recorded history where a YoYo is straight so, jot that down. Diana Ross ends up killing YoYo but somehow there are others who kill Princess Diana.
Coming up next, part 2, uhh… Rattlesnake Ends? Eh, close enough. This is the main character, Go-Go, and his buddy Scissors. They’re training with Lisa Simpson to defeat some rock guys, idk. There’s a Ford Romeo there for some reason. It’s called Rattlesnake Ends cause there’s some animals in here I guess. Oh, and because it’s actually a game of rock paper scissors, rock crushes scissors. Too bad the villains weren’t paper guys instead.
Then there’s this shit, part 3, Fart Lasers. This is where things get weird. There’s these ghost guys, one of them spirit bonded with whatsisname, Bobo or whatever. So bobo decides to go on a cruise with Go-Go from last part and some other guys, uhh… There’s Firey Naked Chicken Spirit Guy, Tentacle Hentai, and Baguette. And they fight some dumbasses. The main villain is the same guy from part 1, Blondie, but Booboo the fool actually kills him this time.
Next up, part 4, Damned if I Know. This guy is DoDo and he meets BoBo from last time. They don’t go on any adventures, they just stay home and make friends. There’s… Money Boy, Short Mystery, Scary Hair Girl, the cartoon guy *#*+Fashion+*#*, and Swedish Chef. All of them get together to solve the scooby doo mystery of who the real nondescript salaryman is… That’s right, it’s, uhh, a melon! Not like that melon guy from part 3, an actual melon. Something, something… duwang chew.
And then Part 5… idk, Venti Cappucino or something? All the characters are named after food. Pink Martin Luther King Jr here is, uhh… Donuts? Shooty McShootface is, uhh… Battenberg? That one's literally just an orange… ANGERY STRAWBERRY! The stepmom's name is… Donut again… And Big Tiddy Goth Gf #1 is another Donut. Erryone’s Donut. Except Strawberry Swirl Ice Cream. She is everyone else. All these foods want to uhh. Be the best food. It’s like Great British Bake Off, including the murder. And the main villain is Strawberry Chocolate Chip Ice Cream and his little brother, Strawberry Ripple Ice Cream.
After that comes part 6, Tone Your Skin. This is the lesbian part. There's Spider-girl, she’s a lesbian… Okuyasu 2: Electric Boogaloo, she’s a lesbian… Big Gulp, she’s a lesbian… Slutty Strawberry Ice Cream, that’s the biggest lesbian of them all. Together with their little buddy Shoe Emporium, they’re gonna save MoMo’s dad BoBo from a cult led by Sonic, a guy with improbable facial hair. Or… not. He gotta go fast...
7th part is Steal a Horse and Run and it’s all about big, juicy, shiny metal baaaallllsss. This dumbass cowboy with emphasis on the ass is called Yooo, like part 1 but different. In this, he meets this bigass grill with a man attached called uhh… Miracle-Gro. Together, they harness the power of Beyblades to defeat this pink guy. I’d make a political joke here but, let’s be real, the current President is already living in a parallel universe.
And finally, part 8, uhh… Jorts Lyin’. This guy is DoDo again, I guess Ara-Ara Reader-Kun ran out of names. He has a girlfriend, Yass Queen, and they… uhh… there’s fruit I guess? And rock guys again? Let’s be real, even DoDo has no idea what’s going on, so why the hell should I?
Anyway, that’s my recap of… HoDown’s Mysterious Happenings. Come back next time but for now… Bye.