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am i a lady or am i a rat

Summary:

felix picked up the energy, nodding enthusiastically, "he's like— the most daddy dom top there is."

hyunjin stared at him with his head tilted in confusion, "no, he's a pillow princess."

"what."
"what."

 

or, felix and hyunjin both get cheated on by changbin, but it's okay cause they make out with each other instead.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:


felix wanted to make brownies for changbin.

the older hadn't been feeling so well recently, and kept cancelling on their plans, which felix totally understood. he hated hearing his boyfriend sick and struggling, so he wanted to do something special for him.

he didn't know how much desserts were going to help heal a sick person, but he knew changbin loved when he baked brownies. its okay, it's the thought that counts.

felix stayed up all night to make sure he could bake the best brownies he could, and even made some extra to give out to others.

the blonde had been over to changbin's apartment plenty of times, and even befriended the cutie at the front desk. he had quickly learned his name was bang chan and another australian like felix— something you don't see often in korea.

this time, he skipped over to the front desk to say hi to chan and make small talk. "hey hyung, how's it going?" felix asked with a smile.

"i've told you, you can call me chris," the older scolded teasingly, what brings you here today, lix?"

felix bounced eagerly, "i brought brownies for changbin cause he wasn't feeling well." he beamed, truly encapsulating the role of sunshine.

a unreadable look passed over chan's face, but was quickly covered with mock hurt as the older boy held a hand up to his chest, "and none for me? you're bestie?"

felix laughs at chan's antics, "of course i brought some for you!! what kind of bestie would i be if i didn't."

the energetic boy pulled the cloth around the extra batch of brownies and chan looked surprised that he he actually had more. felix passed a brownie over to chan, who accepted it gratefully with many thanks.

he took a big bite, and a look of bliss washed over his face, "mMm, lix this is really good!!" he moaned over exaggeratedly.

chris kept chewing happily, but his face began to crinkle as he continued to chew. his face slowly morphed into one of slight distaste.

"almonds."

felix let out a huff, "shut up changbin likes them."

chan squinted with his mouth curled up, "i knew i couldn't trust changbin."

felix laughed and said his goodbyes, beginning his journey up to changbin's apartment. he was excited to see changbin again after so long. he couldn't help it, he really missed the older. the fact that he was sick only made felix worry even more.

the freckled boy skipped over to the elevator, making sure the brownies didn't swing too much in his hand. he hand wrapped the container in one of his roommates cloths that he used for bundling items up (minho didn't know about this).

felix carefully wrapped the box with a cute baby pink cloth, knowing that changbin liked the colour a lot. jisung, his other roommate, had seen him do this in the early morning, and pointed an eyebrow at him.

they both knew that if minho found out, he would complain for centuries, but felix bribed jisung off with a brownie.

felix hopped into the elevator and went to press the button, but he saw a stranger speed walking towards him with a determined look on his face. felix, being ever so kind held the door open.

the stranger got closer, and felix could really see how attractive he was. his hair was long, blonde and tied up messily with thick lips and a mole under one eye. felix thought he looked insanely attractive, but slapped himself out of it 'you have a boyfriend, lee felix.'

once they were both situated inside the elevator, the two went to go pick their floor, only to realize they were both reaching for floor six.

"oh you're on floor six too?" felix jumped when he heard the stranger try to make small talk.

brushing off his surprise, the shorter smiled, "yea, i'm here to visit someone to give him brownies. you want one?" he went to unwrap the bundled up brownies, but the one that wasn't as nicely wrapped as changbin's brownies.

the stranger hesitated, they say 'don't take candy from a stranger', but this wasn't candy, they were brownies. so it should be fine, right? anyway, he took one more look at felix and agreed. the boy was practically radiating sunshine.

the he was pleasantly surprised, "mmh i like the almonds."

felix grinned, he like the stranger already. "thank you! i like almonds too and i added them in cause i thought it would add a nice touch. i'm glad you like them!!" felix grumbled the next part under his breath, referring to chris. "unlike some people."

felix laughed shyly, "i guess this is where i say hi im felix." he held his hand out for the stranger to shake, immediately cursing himself out in his head for it. who the fuck shakes hands anymore, lee felix, are you living in the 19th century?

the stranger didn't seem to mind, however, and took his hand. "i'm hyunjin." and felix's eyes widened slightly at the way his hand encapsulated his own.

the small talk didn't last long before they had reached the sixth floor. the two got off and were ready to say their goodbyes, but this didn't happen as they both turned right.

"wow this is quite the coincidence isn't it?" hyunjin joked, and felix laughed alongside him, agreeing.

felix keep walking and hyunjin seemed to be by his side the entire time. 'holy shit he isn't a sex trafficker, is he?' felix began to silently freak out as he prayed that changbin could still fight in his sick state. (but have you seen his arms? he probably would win.)

at last, felix stopped by changbin's door.. only to find that the taller had stopped as well. felix's heart jumped as his head was filled with a ton of thoughts, the main one being 'holyshitholyshitholyshit—'

"wait are you here for changbin?" a voice broke felix out of the panic he was facing. his heart relaxed, 'oh thank god, it's just a coincidence. he's probably changbin's friend.'

felix nodded, "yea i am, you know changbin?" a dopey smile danced on his face. felix was never good at dealing with stressful situations and this was the aftermath of getting out of one.

"yea he's my boyfriend." the stranger smiled, so innocently that he couldn't have been faking.

felix's head rebooted and his heart stuttered. what was going on? thousands of thoughts were running through the boy's head at the moment. he was mostly in shock and an icky feeling flowed through his veins.

hyunjin could probably sense the distress coming off felix in waves, and he looked concerned.

"he's my boyfriend too." felix stammered out.

the other looked confused, then desperate. he searched felix's face for any signs of a lie, prank, anything. though he could tell from the way felix swallowed heavily and tried so hard to push his tears back that it was real.

"did he say he was sick?" felix peered up at hyunjin with hopeful eyes, maybe it was just one big misunderstanding.

hyunjin shook his head, "no, he told me he busy with school work." his fists were clenched and his jaw was wound up tight.

"that fucker, i was gonna bring him brownies and shit," felix scoffed, though his tough front was ruined by the watery eyes and his red nose.

hyunjin made a sound of agreement, "like bruh, i had bubble tea and everything." he sighed, hands gesturing around aggressively. to his word, felix looked down and saw the bubble tea bag in his hand.

the two stood there quietly, one hiccuping with tears and the other looking absolutely livid.

it was only now that felix identified the emotions that passed over chan's face.

chan looked almost apologetic when he was talking to felix, and that was when the blond realized chan had probably known about changbin cheating this entire time. felix felt hurt. how could his aussie buddy do this?

they sat in a shocked silence, both needing time to fully comprehend what they just figured out. felix's legs turned to mush as he slowly slid down the wall and hyunjin followed suit, their knees cracking in harmony.

no words were exchanged, just the two sitting on their asses as they thought about all the good times they had with changbin, which were now known to be a lie.

felix let out a couple sniffles, and his head was tucked into his knees, figure shaking from time to time. hyunjin decided to take action and nudged a cup of bubble tea towards felix, the one that was supposed to be changbin's.

felix offered him a watery smile and gladly accepted the wordless offer— sweets were exactly what they needed right now. the feeling of stabbing the straw through the plastic lid while imagining it as changbin's face supplied felix enough serotonin to keep him going.

and so, as a token of his appreciation, the younger pulled open the box of brownies. hyunjin gladly took them and the two had a small picnic outside of their ex-boyfriend's apartment.

no one bothered to move, this was actually quite comforting for the both of them.

after a couple small bites of brownie and sips of bubble tea, felix's sadness dwindled and faded into anger. a deep gut wrenching feeling that wanted to choke changbin.

"rat ass mother fucker." felix muttered under his breath. it wasn't meant for hyunjin to hear, but his sharp ears had picked it up.

the other boy laughed. "short bitch," he joined in, but more confident.

the pair took turns chewing changbin out, both getting their inner rage out with this exercise.

"fucking toe licker."

"cock sucker."

"musty doritos lookin' ass."


they eventually eased into giggles, at their own behaviour. felix sighed, a smile falling upon his lips and he leant his head on his palm. felix looked up at hyunjin with the eyes, "how did changbin manage to pick up someone as hot as you."

hyunjin blushed at the compliment and the sparkles gracing felix's eyes. honestly, hyunjin thought his eyes held the entire universe. "look at yourself, you're so fucking pretty."

the two were reduced to small laughs and heavy flushes across their faces.

"so how'd you two meet?" felix asked curiously. he was mostly past the pain at this point.

"we met at a coffee shop," hyunjin started, "damn, that's kind of cheesy isn't it." he laughed but felix was quick to assure him it was nice.

and so the taller continued, "i was a regular there and changbin would write pick up lines on my cup everyday. so one day i took my chance and when he asked what i would like to order that day—" hyunjin brought his face into his hands, cringing at himself, "i said you."

felix giggled at the story, to which hyunjin groaned and tucked himself into felix's side. "i was so embarrassing back then, fuck."

"i don't know, i think i would definitely fall for you if you used that on me." felix hummed with a smile playing on his face, his fingers playing with hyunjin's longer ones. "and plus, i think my story's way more embarrassing."

hyunjin looked up at him with a 'do tell' look on his face (that was two inches away from felix's, by the way). felix thought the elder looked like entirely too cute, and couldn't not give in.

"it was three in the morning and i had to take a piss in the middle of the night, but there was no toilet paper left. i went to the convenience store, and there was only one single roll left." he let out a hefty sigh.

"i went to grab it but so did changbin, and we ended up arguing for twenty minutes. i told him i was about to piss myself, and he was like 'well i need to take a fat shit'." hyunjin laughed whole heartedly at that.

felix continued, "we some how ended up exchanging numbers, and splitting the cost of the roll. to make sure it was completely even, we unravelled the toilet paper and counted each square individually." felix leant his head back in shame, but he still had fond memories of the event.

the two shared a laugh. "pfft that is pretty dumb, you're pretty cute though." hyunjin chuckled whilst looking back up at felix, and the air suddenly shifted.

all of a sudden, felix realized how close they were, and how badly he wanted to kiss the boy he just met that day. the australian could feel a warm breath fanning across his face and the gaze that was set on his lips.

no one acted, and it felt like time froze for the two. felix was pretty sure he stopped breathing and his head was cloudy, but he was sure of his own gaze glued to hyunjin's lips and the way his eyes were fighting to flutter shut.

it felt like an eternity passed before they both somehow ended up leaning back and completely ignoring what just happened. silence ensued, but more so the comfortable, thoughtful type instead of an uncomfortable one.

felix's mind was swarming with thoughts, so many that he couldn't help but break the silence. 'oh well,' he thought, 'if we made it this far, i don't think hyunjin will judge anything i say anymore.'

felix let out a drawn out sigh, "i knew we had an unhealthy amount of sex, but i thought he actually cared for me, y'know?" felix grumbled with a pout on his face.

"but to be honest, the sex was amazing." hyunjin raved, in an attempt to lighten the mood a little more.

felix picked up the energy, nodding enthusiastically, "he's like— the most daddy dom top there is."

hyunjin stared at him with his head tilted in confusion, "no, he's a pillow princess."


"what."
"what."


felix spluttered out, baffled, "have you seen his and his arms?? how can you top that." he waved his arms around for emphasis.

"but have you seen the way he acts when you stick it in— that's not daddy dom behaviour." hyunjin countered. he couldn't picture seo changbin, his little binnie, topping anybody.


"wait i'll be changbin, show me how you do it." and with that, felix stood up swiftly and puffed out his chest as far as it would go, bent down a little, and flexed his arms.

hyunjin cackled at the situation and the sight of felix mocking changbin. it was honestly a little too accurate.

the older took a small step forward, trapping felix in between him and the wall. felix let out an oof and it was like all his buff energy deflated, melting out of his body.

the taller's arm was right beside felix's head and the other was reaching to tilt his chin up.

"what happened to your act, princess?" he smirked, eyes not leaving felix's.

felix felt a wave of heat rush over him. no one except changbin ever made him feel this flustered, but it seems like the hot stranger he met half an hour ago would beg to differ.

"you gonna do something about it, or do i have to?" felix hummed, meeting hyunjin's challenging gaze with one of his own.

this scene felt all too familiar. their eyes flickered to the other's lips, and it was like the tension they had created before came back ten fold.

the only difference this time was that they didn't stop themselves.

hyunjin took the bait, and leant in though felix quickly followed. their lips met, and felix could write a whole twenty page essay on how the boy's lips were the softest, most plush things he's ever felt.

they both tasted like brown sugar milk tea and brownies— a combination that was too sweet, but neither seemed to care at the moment. the younger silently thanked whomever was looking out for him that day for the copious layers of pink grapefruit chapstick he applied this morning (mostly because he liked the taste but that wasn't important).

the kiss start off slow, just the glide of their lips against each other. things began to heat up after hyunjin tilted his head in an attempt to get more, to go deeper.

the two began to pour out every emotion they had through the kiss. if their lips could talk, they would be chanting "fuck seo changbin!!" in perfect synchronization.

felix knew making out with a stranger whom his own boyfriend was cheating on him with, outside of his apartment was petty behaviour. but felix couldn't bring himself to give a single fuck.

neither could the stranger apparently, as he bit on felix's lower lip, swiping his tongue across it moments after— silently asking for access. felix complied, parting his lips and letting out a sound of approval while at it.

felix's hands tangled up into hyunjin's hair and gripped occasionally while hyunjin's grip was tight on felix's hips, rubbing small circles with his thumbs. they basked in the small moans that were pulled out of each other.

they took turns, exploring each other's mouths. tongues were caressing, no parts going untouched. felix's chest was getting tight, and he was almost out of oxygen, but the way that the older was sucking on his tongue was too addicting to stop.

thank god that no neighbour walked in or out at this moment because they would both collapse in embarrassment.

the freckled boy's hands began to wander, going from around hyunjin's neck and sliding down to the hem of his shirt. he slipped his hands under and felt around— to no one's surprise, finding a solid set of abs.

the kiss turned sloppier, and they eventually came to a stop.

"fuck, your hands are so small." hyunjin whispered against his lips to which felix dropped his head onto the taller's shoulder.

they both took a moment to catch their breath. when the hard panting resided, the pair was about to lean back in for another kiss— they were addicted.

however, before they could do so, changbin's door swung open. 'shit, were we too loud?' felix thought to himself in a panic, 'at least it was just changbin and not a neighbour.'

changbin took one look at the two and froze. felix couldn't blame him though, the sight was really something to behold. there, his two "boyfriends", one pinned to the wall by the other, both with kiss swollen lips and a tell tale flush on their faces.

the surprised looks on felix and hyunjin's face soon morphed to anger. changbin paled.

the boys were about to begin yelling when—

"changbin, why are you standing out here?"

from behind changbin emerged a cute boy. he had a boyish face with a square jaw and a smile that closely resembled a puppy.

"s-seungmin, uh go back inside." came the oldest's stuttered response.

it was then felix and hyunjin noticed something odd. the four all had matching flushes, messy hair, and wrinkled clothing, but changbin and the stranger both had a suspicious glow surrounding them. the after sex glow.

it became clearer to felix that the two just fucked.

hyunjin and felix turned to each other in unison, as if the same thought was running through their heads. they looked back at seungmin, sending him flirty gazes.

hyunjin was the first one to make a move, setting one hand on the wall by seungmin's head, but like he did to felix. he played up the seductiveness in his tone, "hey baby, how do you like your eggs in the morning?"

felix stepped forward next, completely disregarding changbin gaping at them beside him. he dragged his finger down seungmin's chest slowly and looking up at the taller through his long lashes, making sure pout a little extra with his words, "let's play titanic. you'll be the iceberg and i'll go down."

"what the fuck's going on." changbin whispered under his breath.

Notes:

me: i'm not gonna write anymore make out scenes
also me: writes THIS

the pacing for this fics kinda wack ngl but i can't proofread my own work cause i get ✨embarrassed✨

seungmin's and changbin are switches btw (bc u def needed to know😃)

I JUST REALIZED ITS CHANGBINS BIRTHDAY AND HES THE BAD GUY HERE OH NO im so sorry binnie hshhshdhd but u can take it as a small bin harem cause he's dating everyone LMAO

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