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Hubert adjusted his tie in the mirror, wondering just how exactly he’d been convinced to do this.
It was a rhetorical question, of course: the combination of his girlfriend, Dorothea’s singing, and a few drinks proved to be a deadly poison, one he’d need to watch out for later.
The poison in question did not kill the person; rather, it warped the mind and filled it with dopamine, making the worst of tasks seem not so bad .
“Are you ready, Hubie?” Mercedes asked, coming up behind him. She was wearing a lovely brown dress with lace at the hems, reserved only for formal events.
“As I’ll ever be,” he sighed. He stepped away from the mirror to grab his guitar case.
Another reason the poison worked so well is because they’d managed to exploit one of his (regrettably) more well-known weaknesses: the chance to play his guitar. It’s the only dream he allowed himself to indulge.
“I promise you, it’s not as bad as you think it’s going to be,” she laughed.
“We shall see,” he frowned, and she laughed again. He locked their apartment and started down the hall towards Mercedes’s car.
A sense of deja vú came over Hubert, and it only got stronger as he got into the shotgun of the car after having safely stored his guitar in the trunk.
Ah, right. This exact scenario (minus the guitar) had played out yesterday.
It started out as a simple double-date. He, Mercedes, Dorothea, and Leonie had all gone out to eat, as they were wont to during an outing like that. Everything was normal for the first part of the date: they’d ordered appetizers, drinks, and entrées, and nothing seemed out of the ordinary. It was only when dessert was ordered that they’d dropped the bomb.
“So, Hubie,” Dorothea began, “Mercedes and I have a favor to ask of you.”
“And what would this favor be?” Hubert asked, taking a sip of his Irish coffee.
“Well, we usually like having a band play at our services,” Mercedes said. “Unfortunately, the guitarist won’t be there tomorrow, and we were wondering if you’d take over for them instead.”
In any other circumstances, Hubert would’ve refused. However, they’d slipped the poison to him in small doses throughout the night, and his mind was no longer as structurally sound as it typically is.
“I don’t see why I couldn’t,” Hubert shrugged.
“Thank you, Hubie,” Mercedes smiled.
“Yeah, you’re a real lifesaver,” Dorothea continued.
Hubert didn’t question his decision for the rest of the night. He didn’t question it when they were driving back home. He didn’t question it when he went to bed. In fact, the gravity of his decision didn’t hit him until Mercedes woke him up and told him it was time to get ready.
He wondered what the other half of the nefarious duo was doing right at this moment. Probably driving to their destination, same as him. In fact, likely the only difference between them at this very moment is that she was coming alone, while Hubert had accompaniment.
He envied Leonie.
Mercedes pulled up to the cathedral and found Dorothea waiting for them.
“I’m glad you came,” she greeted. “Honestly, I thought you were going to back out.”
“As much as I wanted to,” he sighed, removing his guitar from the trunk of her car, “I am not one to back out of my promises.”
“And that’s why we love you. Come on, let’s get set up.”
Hubert suspected they were using that poison again, as he began to think that one time wouldn’t be so bad.
However, if he agreed to it again, he vowed to swear off alcohol for the rest of his days.