Sweet Brother and Hellish Jeffree

my dude. listen. i have a D&Dstuck au. dave is a bard, college of satire. i wrote a whole-ass ballad in the traditional ballad meter for him based on the first sbahj comic. imagine dave singing it, completely out of tune, accompanied by a lute that is a week away from falling apart.
i had spent four years studying literature at university for this. enjoy

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

This is a tale of two sworn friends
Sweet Brother and vile Jeff
And admonitions quite a few
On ears falling deaf

Sweet Brother was a devotee
Of games of different kinds
His passionate love for chess and draughts
Unmatched by plush behinds

While he was walking down the stairs
His gaze was led astray
As he was pondering aloud
What game he'd like to play

Our dashing hero vile Jeff
Seeing this scene transpire
Yelled "Mind the stairs brother dear
Lest early you expire"

O if the warning'd come at least
With two seconds to spare!
As such 'fore long sweet gentle Bro
Was tumbling down the stairs

Our Hellish Jeff was so distraught
He had forewarned his mate!
He wished so desperately his friend
Had not befell such fate

Let this be lesson to us all:
The legend has it grim
The misadventure to this day
Keeps happening to him

Notes:

dave is a great bard, but nobody knows if he can actually sing, because he intentionally does it terribly. he is proficient with the tabar, the flute and the organetto, but not with the lute, which is what he actually plays. with his non-dominant hand.
you can see the accompanying picture here and like. follow me over there on twitter for more D&Dstuck shenanigans

Series this work belongs to:

Part 1 of D&Dstuck

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