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A Collection of Dirt

Summary:

Katarina and her friends collect precious memories in some short pieces.

Katarina also collects jars of soil, but don't tell her mother.

Jar 10.) Alan refuses to let Katarina win. Even when she doesn't know she's playing. (DRABBLE)

Chapter 1: Cufflinks and Soil

Summary:

Keith receives some letters from his parents while they are away. Katarina receives something very different. Alan is here too.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Alan found Keith perched on a chair in the school waiting room, an open package in front of him. The earth mage seemed distracted, adjusting his cuffs as he read two sets of pieces of paper in front of him. Or rather, Keith was reading only one of them, and then occasionally took glimpses at the other. Seeing how he wasn't going to get a greeting unless he made the first move, Alan somehow managed to gracefully slump into the chair opposite the boy (perks of a royal upbringing). Keith jumped out of his skin for a moment before he collected himself.

"Ah, Prince Alan. Good morning." he said hurriedly, folding the set he had been reading through up and placing it in his jacket pocket.

"Hey." Alan said casually. "Who's the letters from?"

Keith gathered the second set less hurriedly. "This one is from Duke and Duchess Claes."

Alan raised his eyes at the formality. "And the other one?"

Keith sighed. "That one is from my father and mother."

Alan paused for a moment and put on his confused scowl (which Katarina believed was his default face just due to how often she confused him). "Aren't they the same people?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. He knew Keith wasn't Katarina's brother biologically, but since the fourth prince had meet the boy he'd always refer to the Duke and Duchess as his parents.

Keith ran his hand through his hair. "I mean yes? But. Gah." he started again. "Mother and father send me two different sets of letters. This one is from the Duke and Duchess providing their heir technical details of their recent diplomatic trip to Kisalo."

Alan nodded. Kisalo was a island nation to the south of Sourcier, known for impressive craftwork and their royal families skill at fire and earth magic; as might be expected from a country built around a volcano. The Claes, as one of the most prestigious earth magic families in the country, were natural choices to send to the court. "You know you shouldn't be reading that kind of thing in public." he said, his scowl shifting to a more serious one.

Keith met his gaze levelly, seemingly happy to focus on this letter rather than the other one. "It's in code, of course. We aren't foolish."

Alan muttered something about that not applying to all the Claes family, which Keith steadfastly ignored, possibly because he couldn't refute the idea that Katarina would absolutely read non-coded secrets aloud in public. He, of course, could have, if he knew that Katarina kept several notebooks written in the near-unbreakable code of a language from another world, but the poor lad was not aware of this fact. Instead. he simply cleared the package that the letters had come in from the table.

"And the other one?" asked Alan, raising an eyebrow. Keith sighed again.

"That one is from my parents in their role of my mother and father. They send two, so that familial relations do not distract from the political matters," he paused "and so that the serious tone doesn't mess up the letters between us as a family."

Alan's scowl became interested. "Huh. That's actually a pretty good system."

Keith nodded. "The problem is. Well, you've met my parents. Their letters can get rather." he paused and searched for a word.

"Mushy?" supplied Alan. "Overbearing?"

"Loving." finished Keith. "I love receiving them but-"

"But you wouldn't want me seeing them, I'm guessing." said Alan, leaning back in his chair. "Particularly as I bet that one has the key words for the code for the other one in it, right?"

Keith pouted. "You princes are annoyingly quick on the draw, you know that."

Alan laughed. "Anyway, yeah, I've meet your parents. Are they that loveydovey in the letters as well?"

Keith's face was all he needed to see as an answer, and he laughed harder.

The laughter faded out as Keith finished packing away his stuff, and the two of them sat in silence for a minute, listening to the room's grand clock ticking. "You heading to the council room?" asked Alan, noting the time. Keith shook his head.

"Katarina's parcel from our parents got held up for some reason, so I'm waiting here while she and Anne sort it out." his expression told Alan that Keith would rather be helping sort it out himself, but someone had sent him out here. Probably Katarina, since she was the only one he'd instantly obey. She probably told him to go the council room without her, but he knew that Keith was unlikely to .

"Oh? What did she get then? Some kind of present?" asked Alan. Keith shrugged.

"I'm not sure. I got these." He held out his wrists, and showed Alan what he had been fiddling with on his wrists as the prince entered. A pair of extremely handsome glass cuff links sat on his wrists, in the shape of birds in flight. Bands of colour ran throughout, worked into the glass. It was the kind of subtle but stylish fashion that Keith seemed to pull off so well.

"Very nice." said Alan, appreciatively. "Your fans will like them I'm sure."

Keith groaned and his near perfect posture slumped a little. "Don't remind me. I have no idea how Nicol deals with his."

"I think he just sits back and lets them take each other out." smirked Alan, leaning back in his chair.

Once again, the two friends lapsed back into a companionable silence as they watched the door to the school’s package office and waited for Katarina. Theoretically, Alan could have left to the council chambers, or Keith could have sent him on, but they both knew, in their bones, that they’d be sitting here waiting however long it takes, and that if any other members of their group arrived, they would also be waiting however long it took for Katarina to arrive.

Five minutes later, Alan was reviewing some notes on hydrokinesis theory while Keith had stood up and was examining the ornate carvings on the wood of the room’s clock when the waiting room’s door swung open and Katarina stumbled through, carrying a large wooden crate in her hands. Anne, who had gotten the door for her, followed at a more controlled pace as the weight in Katarina’s hands and the excitement in her heart sent the young noble stumbling around the room.

“Sorry Keith! They took ages! The clerk didn’t believe that this was the kind of package that would be sent to a young lady and they wanted to get Professor Antigone to check it out, oh hey Alan!” she chirped without taking a breath. Alan raised a hand in greetings.

“What do you have then?” he asked, standing up and heading towards the table where Katarina had placed the crate and was now eagerly opening it up. Keith joined them, standing next to his sister.

“Yes, what did father send you? You were both rather coy about it.”

Katarina giggled. “Well mother wouldn’t approve so we had to do it secretly! But it’s done now so she probably knows.”

Keith had entered into clean up mode already Alan noticed. “Sister, what did you ask for?”

Katarina giggled, and removed the crate lid and began rooting through the soft packing straw. “I asked for…” she paused for dramatic effect “These!” she finished triumphantly, pulling out a large, thick walled glass jar of soil.

“You asked for a jar of dirt?” asked Alan, snorting.

“No! I asked for three jars!” replied Katarina happily, pulling out another two jars that to Alan looked exactly the same. Alan’s snorting became full on laughter that he didn’t bother hiding.

“Sister, may I ask why?”

“Kisako-“

“Kisalo” corrected Keith

“Kisalo thanks, is a volcanic island right? And when you think of volcanoes what do you think of?”

The two boys stared at her. “Eruptions?” asked Keith
“Calamities?” followed up Alan.

“No no no!” said Katarina, grinning broadly. “The correct answer is super fertile soils!”

Alan and Keith looked at each other and raised their eyebrows. Luckily, Anne was on hand to voice their thoughts.

“I believe you are one of the only ones who immediately thinks of that, my lady.” She said, hands crossed primly in front of her.

“Huh! That’s weird! More people should think of the soil first!” said Katarina happily. She picked up one of the jars and shook it in front of Alan’s face. “So anyway, I asked Father to send me back samples! I wanted to have a look at some of the different soil types they had! And look, he’s got all three main ones I saw in my books!” Her voice was utterly gleeful.

Alan stared at the jar dancing in front of his face and then back at the other two jars on the table. “So they’re different then?” he asked, straining his eyes. Keith made a thoughtful noise.
“I think that one is more sandy than the others?” he said, pointing at the one in Katarina’s hands. “Then that one looks like it has more clay?” Katarina nodded excitedly.

“Yeah! And then this last one is from further up the foothills of the volcano!” Her voice took on the same quality it did as when she looked down on Alan from a tree branch in one of their contests as children.  “They are really very different Prince Alan, you need to work on your knowledge of soil!”

Alan wore yet another type of scowl. “You’re not getting me into a contest of knowing things about dirt, farmer girl.”

Katarina cackled. “Then I shall declare it a win by default!”

“Now just wait a minute!” But before the two could really be set off, Keith coughed.

“While I’m happy you got what you want sister, what are you going to do with them? This hardly seems enough to use on your fields, even if they are as fertile as you say.”

Katarina grinned at him and began packing the jars away. “Oh no, I’m not going to put them on my fields!”

Alan and Keith paused, waiting for her next declaration.

“I’m putting these in pride of place in my soil collection in my room! You guys go to the council chambers, I’ll catch up once I’ve put these away!” she said, as she strapped the lid back on and scooped up the box in her arms.

Keith and Alan stared at her for a moment as she made her strange, dancing way though to the door, the box again not slowing her down but simply putting her off balance.

“Wait, sister, what collection? How long have you being doing this? Sister!”

Notes:

I actually read some papers on volcanic soil types for this but then realised...that's all from the last century, Sourcier wouldn't have it and Katarina wouldn't know it from her past life.
It was fun to read but ended up not getting in. Yet. It might do another time.

Chapter 2: Show and Tell

Summary:

Katarina wants to show her friends something, while the author refuses to keep these at a consistent length.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“Come on everyone, come on!” cheered Katarina as she dragged Sophia by the hand and the rest of the group by her charisma.

She stops at a set of double doors, turning to them and grinning. “There’s something really cool I want to show you all in here! Something super amazing!”

They all look Keith, who shrugs. Katarina shoves the doors open. The room is sparsely furnished, dominated by a huge mirror across one wall. She points at it excitedly.

“See! See!”

“It’s a lovely mirro-“

“No no! Not the mirror!” She grins at their reflections. “It’s all of you!”

Notes:

Fun fact: The 100 word form of the drabble was invented in the University of Birmingham Science Fiction and Fantasy Society in the 80s, which, decades later, I was Chairbeing of during my undergraduate time, so I like to keep the art form alive.

Chapter 3: Magpie Mary

Summary:

Mary is known to love jewels.

Chapter Text

Mary carefully removed the sapphire from its bindings, eyes squinting through the magnifying glass as she examined the gem for any distinctive markings that might let someone recognise it. The ring that carried it, a birthday gift from a noble currying favour, was no good; the jeweller’s mark was clear, and the shop would contain records. Anyone who found this one could, with the right resources, trace it back to her.

She picked up the next piece in the pile next to her arm on the table, and scowled. She recognised the cut and style of the jeweller immediately. He was one of the best in the capital. This one would be no good. It would be traced back to her ownership immediately. She placed this one in the container that she would take back to her room and add to her normal rotation of jewellery.

Mary Hunt was known as a magpie by most. Alone among her close female friends, she openly flaunted her love and appreciation of jewellery, assuring that those wanting to get in her good graces would gift her the pretty bangles (or, more usually, get a servant to purchase a suitable piece of jewellery). She would smile and charm them, and there were many of them, given how she had become known as one of the next generation of nobles to watch, and then, once they looked away, she would take each of the gems and rings and necklaces she gave her and carefully sort through them.

Lady Katarina, while she didn’t particularly like jewellery, supported her collection. Sometimes Mary liked to imagine that it was because Lady Katarina understood her plan, but really she knew that Katarina didn’t get it. It was an aspect of noble society, and thus something that Katarina seemed incapable of understanding. Noble ladies did not value jewellery just for its beauty.

Noble ladies valued jewellery because it was easily transportable and concealable,  and, in an emergency, was an excellent source of funds.

Once the jewels that she could not get away with disappearing, such as any gifts from the royal family, were placed to the side, she took the rest down to the store shed for her rose garden, locked the door, and carefully pulled out a set of jeweller’s tools. It was not a skill she publicised to anyone, not even Lady Katarina. It was a skill she built up to be able to help Katarina without anyone realising.

Here in her shed, anything of worth that she thought could be sold without being traceable were removed and carefully stashed in a number of hiding places, so that no matter where she was when she heard Lady Katarina had left, she could easily grab a bag of jewels and be ready to leave. The gems were replaced with falsifications, pieces of carefully coloured glass, and returned to the collection in her room.

No one thought to check whether the tiny sparkles behind the large and very real diamonds on open display were real, after all. Hide a lie in the truth.

While jewellery and gems were easy to sell, this was also exactly why they were made to be easily traceable, with lists and jewellers marks on them. Openly this was to help crack down on jewel thieves, but Mary personally suspected this was also to prevent noble girls like her and Katarina escaping.

And escape had seemed to be on Katarina’s mind for years now, even since Mary had met her. Mary did not know why, and Katarina did not seem ready to tell. But Mary worried. Not that Katarina was planning to run away; Mary had long made plans and arrangements to immediately follow her. No. She was worried that her love was too naïve about her financial plans. She was good at growing plants, and had the stamina to work for long days, but she would still need land and a place to live and, Mary suspected, Katarina with her love of books and sweets would find a tight budget harder than Katarina believed.

So this was Mary’s contribution. A pile of jewels, carefully chosen so that even Prince Gerald (the number one suspect in Mary’s mind as to why Katarina would want to flee, although she still did not understand why) could not trace them to her and Katarina and a network of fences and pawn shops she could dance her way through.

Katarina deserved the best life she could have, and Mary would build that for her on a river of sapphires.

Chapter 4: The World Continues

Summary:

Katarina's fears have changed over time. (DRABBLE)

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Subconsciously Katarina hadn’t be afraid of Gerald or Keith deciding to kill her for a long time. It was hard, even for her, to miss just how different they were to their game counterparts.

But her new fear was possibly worse.

The world seemed determined to play out Fortune Lover. Maria’s meeting with the boys, Maria still being bullied. Despite her not taking that path, the denouncement in the cafeteria still happened.

Kataria did not fear them choosing to kill her.

Now she feared they would have no choice, and have to watch their own bodies play out her fate.

Notes:

So it seems I am doing a drabble every even chapter. I wanted to write something like this, and wanted to see if the punchiness of a drabble would help.

Chapter 5: Leg Day

Summary:

Katarina does, in fact, lift bro.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

"Upsy Daisy!" chirped Katarina happily, placing her hands below Sophia's arm pits and lifting the shorter girl clean up in the air. The albino ep'ed as she found her legs floating in midair and her face level with Katarina's. 

"Lady Katarina!" She cried, face turning red as fifty ideas about what was happening ran through her mind at once, each less likely but more exciting than the last. Many people had compared Sophia to a porcelain doll, but this is the first time Sophia really felt like one; Katarina's arm muscles barely seemed to be flexing to hold her up. Katarina gave her a smile, but then frowned.

"No, sorry Sophia, this isn't going to work."

"What? Lady Katarina, I'll make it work, I swear-"

"I mean you could but you're just too light. I need someone heavier, sorry Sophia!"

The brunette gently placed her friend back on the ground. Sophia staggered back onto a bench, face the colour of her eyes. Katarina startled. "Oh no, did I hurt you at all Sophia! I was being as careful as I could when I picked you up!"

Sophia shook her head. "No, I'm fine, just...what was that about Lady Katarina?"

Katarina made an awkward smile. "Well see I've been looking at my muscles right and my arms are fantastic." she flexed and even through the green fabric of her overalls Sophia could see the movement. "But I think I need to stop skipping leg day." She slapped her thighs in demonstration and Sophia bit her lip.  "I use my arms a lot more for tree climbing and stuff but I need some...oh, Keith!" she shouted and waved, the sight of her brother completely distracting her. Keith waved to her as he made his way to the secluded bench the two were sitting at.

"Perfect timing bro!" said Katarina as she scuttled over to meet him. "I bet earth magic users are heavier than air magic users right! That makes sense!"

"Sister, what do you mea-" Keith wasn't able to finish his sentence before he too was up in the air, like a leaf in the wind.

"What! Keith, you're so light bro! Look at this you're even lighter than Sophia! We need to fatten you up!" cried Katarina, genuinely worried for her brother, which translated to the poor boy being hoisted into the air by her. "Look at this Sophia! What am I going to do with Kei...Keith! Are you okay! Everyone's going red today!"

Keith was set down and the poor boy given time to recover. Sophia knew the feeling. When he could speak, he also ask Katarina what she was doing, and she started back from the beginning again about her arm muscles and whatever leg day was, but before she could finish-

"So I went to see Prof. Ke...Nicol! Over here!"

Nicol, being a beanpole, was also deemed too light for Katarina's purposes, and while he was recovering from his slight flush (which in Nicol language was the equivalent of turning scarlet), Mary arrived. Sophia marvelled at the council's ability to arrive in drips and drabs, while a very enthusiastic Mary was again picked up. She was deemed as getting there, but still not heavy enough, although at Mary's request Katarina did spin her around and virtually fling her up in the air, filling the field with the girl's giddy laughter. As she reached the apex of a particularly impressive arc, the third prince arrived, coughing gently.

"Hey Gerald!" said Katarina, utterly failing to understand the meaning to the cough. "Do you have a sore throat?" She slowly spun down to a stop, a disappointed Mary returning to the earth. They both staggered a bit from dizziness due to the spinning. Mary dropped into the shade of a tree, desperately fanning herself, face oscillating between disappointment and bliss as fast as her fan moved.

He shook his hand. "No no my dear. I'm just curious as to what you were up to."

Katarina grinned. "Well, I was thinking about working out my legs you see, and so I went to see Prof. Kenat...wait, is he a professor? The sword instructor guy from the boy's side." Gerald nods.

"I know Kenat." 

"Anyway, so I ask if I can use some of the work out equipment he has for training, and do you know...Ah, Maria!"

The group sighed as Maria appeared and inadvertently distracted Katarina once again.

"Lady Katarina! I brought you some..." she revealed a small carefully covered basket with delicious freshly baked smells wafting from it. Katarina made a happy squeal. "Oh Maria, those smell so good! But" she looked around "Can you give some to Keith and Sophia and Nicol?" Maria made a hurt and confused look and Katarina shook her hands in a slight panic "It's not that I don't want them! It's just...look at them! They're so skinny! They need to put some weight on!"

Maria looked at the other three, who made faces back indicating that they didn't know what Katarina was talking about either.

"Sister is lifting all of us up. Something to do with her muscles?" said Keith, one hand at the side of his face in what Maria was coming to recognise as his "oh sister" pose.  

"Well if she wants to lift me, I'd be happy for her to do so." said Maria, more calmly than she felt, as she placed the basket down on the bench next to Sophia.

Gerald coughed. "I think I shall be the most useful." he said, flashing a smile at Katarina, his questions about Kenat disappeared by the threat of Katarina physically touching the rest of the group but not him.

"I mean, you are pretty buff from all that sword stuff so maybe..." Katarina stepped up to him, and he had just long enough to stare into her eyes and think this could be very romant- before her hands were under his armpits and he was hoisted into the air. "Oh wow, yeah. I think all the gold stuff you wear helps too! Best one so far Gerald!" said Katarina happily, before putting him down. "Yeah! Yeah, okay, so now let's do the next step..."

"Wait, Lady Katarina!" cried Maria, stepping forward. "Don't you want to try me?"

"I doubt you'll be as heavy as me" said Gerald. "There's the height difference and the difference in our builds after all."

"Either way, please, Lady Katarina?" asked Maria, turning a look of sunshine onto Katarina's face. Maria may not understand exactly what was going on but damned if she wasn't going to get lifted by Katarina if everyone else had!

"Okay Maria! Here goes!" Katarina lifted, and this time made a small grunt of effort as Maria came up a bit more slowly. "Oh wow, Maria! You're so compact! I never would have realised you were so heavy!" she said in a manner that made it clear she thought being heavy was a good thing.

"Well, I am a commoner" said Maria, flashing what for her was a very cocky look at the others. "We do work harder in our everyday lives than most nobles."

Katarina nodded. "I can tell! You're like fruitcake! That's always heavier than it looks too! Ooh, fruitcake..." she tailed off, distracting herself with the idea for a sweet treat.

Maria nodded. It wasn't the first time she'd be called a fruitcake, but it was the first time it was so obviously meant as a compliment. "So what do you need me for, Lady Katarina?" she asked, still in midair. Katarina took a deep breath again.

"Well, I want to train my legs, but Kenat, the physical training guy, wouldn't let me! Said it wasn't suitable for a lady! So I've been looking for other stuff I can lift to show him but everything is too light but then I thought of...Alan!" She cried, so loudly the fourth prince actually jumped as he rounded the corner. Maria would have jumped as well if she wasn't currently in the air. Soon she was back on the ground, with Katarina briefly apologising before charging at the prince and jumping around him excitedly. "Oh yeah! Look at you Alan! Those muscles, that height! You are perfect!"

Alan looked pleased about the dramatic compliment, embarrassed, confused and nervous about the glares everyone else was sending his way behind Katarina. She didn't notice however.

"Alright then, let's get this started!" she said. And then she grabbed Alan's shoulder with one hand, scooped down and grabbed his leg on the same side with the other, and before he knew what was happening she had scooped him up and over her shoulders.

"Claes! What are you doing you monkey? Put me down!" Alan cried.

"I'm doing body weight exercises! Your body weight!"

"That's not what that means!" 

"Shh, it's only for a bit, now hold still so you don't mess up my squats!"

"What!?"

"ONE!" Katarina, still carrying Alan across her shoulders, spaced her legs and dropped down into a squat. The rest of the group could only stare as she continued her work out accompanied by Alan's declarations of confusion.

Keith looked at Gerald. "I think perhaps Kenat may need some...training on gender equality."

The third prince nodded slowly, a rare alligence forming between the two. "Or we could get her some weights of her own, then she wouldn't need to deal with them."

Sophia turned to them with hands full of cake she'd be stuffing herself with from the basket Maria had put down. "If you stop her doing this before I get big enough for her to lift I am going to be so pissed at you." She shoved more cake in her mouth, her cheeks bulging outwards, and she glared at the two like an angry hamster.  

Notes:

I don't even know.

Chapter 6: Puppy Crush

Summary:

Anne compliments Sophia's hair, a weak point. (DRABBLE)

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“We fall in love too easily.” Nichol said as he followed Sophia’s gaze towards the field. For once not at Katarina, but at the maid standing nearby. Sophia blushed.

It wasn’t a big thing. Sophia has slept over in Katarina’s room and Anne had helped her get ready.

“Your hair is excellent to style” said Anne. It was blunt, not like Katarina’s compliments, but even now, anyone complimenting her hair would get some of Sophia’s affections, at least for a few days.

Anne noticed Sophia’s blush, groaned, and hoped the crush would dissipate soon. These kids had terrible romantic targeting.

Notes:

Anne is very cool and she has no romantic interest in any of the kids. Don't worry, Sophia will get over it.

Chapter 7: Ka Ka Katarin(a)

Summary:

With apologies to Boney M.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey

There lived a certain girl in Sorcier long ago

She was big and strong, in her eyes a flaming glow

Her mother looked at her with confusion and with fear

But to noble chicks she was such a lovely dear

She could destroy her doom flags like a master

Full of ecstasy and fire

But she also was the kind of disaster

Women would desire

Ka Ka Katarin(a)

Lover of all she’s seen

There was a cat that really was gone

Ka Ka Katarin(a)

Sorcier's stupidest love machine

It was a shame how she carried on

She ruled the Council’s minds, ‘cept for Sirius the Czar

But the maple trees she climbed really wunderbar!

In all affairs of love she was the girl to please

But she felt real great when she planted out her peas

For the queen she was no wheeler dealer

Though she'd heard the things she'd done

She believed the girl was a healer

Who would cheer her son

Ka Ka Katarin(a)

Lover of all she’s seen

There was a cat that really was gone

Ka Ka Katarin(a)

Sorcier's 's dumbest love machine

It was a shame how she carried on

But when her farming and climbing

And her hunger for sweets

Became known to more and more people

The demands to do something

About this outrageous girl

Became more and more concrete

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey

"This girl’s just got to go", declared her enemies

But the ladies begged, "don't you try to do it, please"

No doubt this Katarin(a) had lots of hidden charms

Though she was a dolt, they just fell into her arms

Then one day some girls of lower standing

Set a trap, they're not to blame

"Come to lunch with us", they kept demanding

And she really came

Ka Ka Katarin(a)

Lover of all she’s seen

They called her a bully all this time

Ka Ka Katarin(a)

Sorcier’s oblivious love machine

Her friends stepped in and then she felt fine

Ka Ka Katarin(a)

Lover of all she’s seen

Deike didn't quit, he wanted her head

Ka Ka Katarin(a)

Sorcier’s greatest love machine

And so he made her sleep 'til she was dead!

(Oh, those doom flags!)

Notes:

Me, looking at the pile of more serious and insightful one shots in progress: Okay but what if I just do a find and replace on a song?

The song is Rasputin by Boney M, one of the more bizarre choices for basing a disco track on. It's sort of the Hamilton of the 70s I guess but only one song long.

Chapter 8: Tea and Gossip

Summary:

Duchess Claes discusses a certain harem member.

Chapter Text

Duchess Claes surveyed her fellow nobles at their tea and gossip. Gossip which revolved around her daughter and her…harem. Milidiana’s eyebrow twitched at the word. Still, she had words to share on this member.

“Through her childhood visits to my estate, I have watched Lady Hunt grow from a shy, timid child into a vicious, brutal young lady. I have seen her reduce gentlemen to tears with words alone, and I daresay by the age of twenty she will have blackmail material on most of us here.” The duchess sipped her tea.

“Frankly she’s my favourite other than my children.”

Chapter 9: Playing for Silver

Summary:

Anne is asked her views on Katarina's romantic prospects.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

"What do you think, Miss Shelley?"

The maid looked up from clearing up the papers her Lady had left in the student council room when she had dashed off to look at the third prince. It was unusual for her to be in the presence of the student council without her Lady, but Katarina had gone to meet one of her many different secondary social groups and had managed to leave her homework behind, and had asked Anne to retrieve it.

"Pardon me Lord Prince, but my thoughts on what?"

Gerald smiled. "Your thoughts on who Katarina will choose among us. I'm sure, given we are both Katarina's longest running companions, you will be with me that I am the clear forerunner."

Anne had been raised to submit to her superiors in rank, to obey, and as the senior prince in the room and her Lady's fiancée, Gerald certainly counted. Not to mention the way his gaze seemed to possess weight: Katarina sometimes muttered about him being a black hearted prince, and at times Anne knew exactly what her Lady meant but that. It was so easy for her to agree, or, given the way the rest of the student council was staring at her, at least to demure and use her station as a way to avoid answering. But...perhaps it was all this time with Katatina rubbing off on Anne. Perhaps it was the sight of Maria Campbell,  a commoner, holding herself as an equal to a prince for Lady Katarina. Or perhaps it was Gerald's mention of how long they had been with Katarina that flung a very clear image of the children the student council had been into Anne's head. Either way, she straightened first the papers and then her posture before answering. 

"I do not have any particular opinions on the games you play for Lady Katarina's hand."

There was a moment of silence, before Gerald's reply, sure to be as smooth and cutting as a polish sword was drowned out by Lady Hunt's indignant declarations. "I do not play games with Lady Katarina's heart! I love her!"


The rest of the group, except for the highly amused council president, chorused their agreement. Anne waited for one of them (Keith, as it turned out) to demand what she meant, and she continued. "I do not mean you are treating your affections towards my lady as a game" she ignored Prince Alan spluttering and asking what affections she meant "Rather, I simply mean that so far you do not punish the other players as you could. In ordinary circumstances, Your highness, a prince would be unlikely to allow a commoner girl to peruse his fiancée."

Gerald looked at Maria, who had gone rather pale. "But that would be against the rules of the game, would it not?" Continued Anne. "Lady Katarina feels great affection for everyone here, so everyone here must be treated as, if not an equal, at the very least a potential rival, regardless of the situation, and that applies to any other potential new players of the game."

She bowed her head. "If I may, I think this is an excellent trait of this group. I say it is a game because none of you have been cruel enough to turn this into a war." She tucked the papers she was holding under her arm. "Now, my lady has asked me to return these to her as soon as possible, so I am afraid I must take my leave."

She let orders to stay slide over her with the simple explanation that her lady's orders had priority, but paused at the door.

"I will say one thing however. The ultimate prize of this game is to take your place by my Lady's side, is it not? Then, ladies and gentlemen, I am afraid to say you are all playing for second place."

She curtsied and left. Behind her, there was a moment of silence before the council, as one, realised what she meant, and the room exploded into talk.

Notes:

A quick thing from my in process catalogue. Could be expanded but...eh. Could maybe be read as romantic on Anne's side but it's more platonic I think.

Chapter 10: Staring Contest

Summary:

Alan refuses to let Katarina win. Even when she doesn't know she's playing.

Chapter Text

Alan sat facing Katarina, his nine year old legs not able to reach the floor. She hadn't said a word since he arrived twenty minutes ago. Just piercing him with her gaze. Fine, if she wanted a staring contest, like hell he was backing down!

"Meeting adjourned!" Said Judge Katarina as the council finished.

"Wait, when did Alan get here?" Asked Timid, looking at the KatarinaVision(tm) screen.

"I don't know but I think he wants to do a staring contest." Said Studious. Adventurous grinned.

"Like hell we're gonna back down!"

Alan and Katarina did not move for a long time.