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“Josh, don’t forget it’s my wedding day today. Please go to the reception at least. I swear if I don’t see your ass tonight, I will forget that you’re my best friend.” Joshua rolled his eyes after hearing Jun’s threat from the other line. “As if, Jun.”
“Oh, I would dare, Josh. Try to not show up and you’ll see.” Jun was serious with his warning this time since he was already slightly irritated with his best friend.
Who the hell won’t get mad at what Joshua did? He just canceled at the last minute. He was supposed to be Jun’s best man but he was unable to make time since he was already booked with appointments from left to right that day and he can’t manage to cancel them since these clients were important. Luckily, Jihoon volunteered to be Joshua’s replacement instead or else Jun would have been hysterical on his wedding day.
Joshua worked hard and made sure to finish all his appointments as fast as possible before the clock strikes 7pm. As much as he wanted to tease his best friend by coming in late at the reception, he no longer wanted to add fuel to Jun’s flaming anger since this was his special day.
“I think this design is perfect, what do you think, love?” The client went to her husband asking for reassurance before giving the go signal. The couple was taking too long to decide and Joshua still has one last client to cater. He was itching to check the time but looking at your watch in front of a client is disrespectful, so he had to resist for now.
“As long as you love it, hun. When are you planning to start, Josh?” The husband turned to him and he immediately responded, “As soon as possible. But I’ll let you know the exact date once I submit the report to my company, sir” The couple nodded and a few more chitchats until they left.
Joshua let out a sigh and checked his watch. It was almost 6pm and he still has one client left. Luckily his secretary called and informed him that the last appointment got canceled. He rushed to his car and immediately went back to his unit to change clothes. He wanted to take a quick shower but it would consume a lot of time and he still hasn’t figured out where the venue was located.
Okay, not that Joshua didn’t grow up in this city but he’s really not the type of person to go visit and memorize every hotel there is, you know. He knows some famous hotels around his area, but he never heard of the name Jun gave for their reception.
He immediately grabbed his coat and some styling kits before going back to his car. It feels like fate has been messing with him today because the moment he started the engine, the car won’t turn on.
Joshua grunted and slammed both of his hands on the steering wheel. He checked the time and it was 6:29 p.m., 31 more minutes before Jun disowns him. He called Seokmin and asked him if he could pick Joshua up because he doesn’t know the location and somehow his car broke down.
“Sure hyung! Wait for me at the convenience store near you. I’ll pick you up from there.”
“Great! Thanks, Seokie” Seokmin ended the call. Joshua got his coat, phone, wallet and a small bag that contains some styling stuff and headed to the nearest convenience store.
He was just about to take a seat to one of the benches when a taxi stopped in front of him. The door on the back seat opened and he heard someone call his name. The voice was too familiar so he walked closer to the door and bent down to look at who's inside, and there he saw the face of the person he thought he’d never see again. The most angelic face he had ever laid eyes on since high school. The person he loved the most.
“Jeonghan”
“Hi Shuji. I mean Shua. Come on or else we’re gonna be late!” Jeonghan didn’t even think twice pulling Joshua in the cab.
“I thought- What are you doing here?” Joshua cannot think straight on what to say. He was still in shock, okay? It’s been 2 years since he saw this man in front of him.
“Seokmin told me you didn’t know the way and I was just around the corner so I told him I’d be the one to fetch you since he was already there and they were busy rehearsing for their special number.”
“Oh” Joshua blinked twice before shifting to a more comfortable position. Seconds later he remembered that he still needed to fix his appearance. So he opened his styling kit, combed his hair, applied a little hair spray, and pulled out some light foundation.
Joshua was busy preparing when his favorite song played in the cab.
“Oh! That’s my favorite song!” Joshua squealed which made Jeonghan laugh.
Jeonghan knows how much Joshua loves this song and whenever it plays, Joshua will surely sing along no matter where they are.
He silently sat beside Joshua while the latter was busy putting on a light make-up just to highlight some of his features as he sings to Sunday Morning by Maroon 5.
Jeonghan can’t help but smile at the view. He definitely still loves this guy. He never stopped and he doesn’t think he ever will. If only he didn’t have to go, they could still be together. Jeonghan started to feel emotional just by remembering what had happened, but he immediately shook his head before his thoughts swallowed him whole.
“Hey, you okay?” Joshua was done preparing and was now adjusting his coat. Jeonghan faced him with a smile on his face, a genuine one. “Of course”
Despite their past, Jeonghan was really happy to see that the love of his life was actually doing better. He heard Joshua had a hard time during the first months but he wasn’t able to reach out or more like he didn’t want to, because he knew it would only be harder for Joshua to let go. He had to do what he had to do.
Minutes later, they arrived at the venue with 20 minutes to spare. The moment they enter, they immediately spotted their friends. I mean who wouldn’t? Their group was the loudest among the guests.
Joshua smiled and thought it’s like nothing changed at all. Their friends were still the same, everyone was still hyper and bubbly even if they haven’t seen each other in a long time. It’s been a year since they all got together and if it wasn’t because of Jun’s wedding, they wouldn’t be able to have this reunion.
Jeonghan pulled a chair for Joshua and surely Seungkwan didn’t miss that. “*Ehem* Seems like someone’s getting back together after 2 years?” All of their friends started teasing them immediately.
Jeonghan saw the blush in Joshua’s face as their friends made fun of them. He was about to glare at his friends when Joshua started to laugh at everyone. “Guys, don’t pressure Jeonghan. He might leave again.”
“Ooooooh '' their friends said in chorus. Jeonghan froze at Joshua’s remarks. He knows the younger was just joking around but he felt a slight pang in his heart.
“Hyung, are you still leaving?” Seungkwan whispered at Jeonghan. Everyone was busy talking to each other catching up and Jeonghan turned his gaze to the man sitting beside him who was currently busy laughing at Soonyoung’s jokes. “I think I’m staying this time” He unconsciously answered and Seungkwan widely smiled at that.
The event started and when it was time to eat, the newlyweds decided to visit their friends' table.
“JOSHUA HONG!” Joshua didn’t even have to turn to know who’s the person who called. He stood up from his seat and instantly hugged the groom “Congratulations Junnie!” Jun just rolled his eyes as he hugged his best friend back.
“Thank God you came. Although I was really looking forward in finding a new best friend” Joshua elbowed his best friend
“I know you won’t. You just love me too much”
While they were busy teasing each other, Wonwoo was already talking with their friends.
“Yoon Jeonghan??” Jun gasped as he eyed the man beside Joshua. “Surprise?”
“Omygod! You’re back!” Jun squealed and immediately hugged the guy. Joshua shook his head while smiling.
Everyone was busy talking to Jun and Wonwoo until the couple had to do their last dance. It was time for Seokmin and Seungkwan to sing.
After the first chorus, Soonyoung offered his hand to his fiancé, “Care to dance, Mr. Kwon?” he teased. “It’d be an honor, Mr. Lee” Jihoon answered and off they went to the dance floor.
All of their friends were now scattered and only the two of them were left at their table. Jeonghan was quietly watching Joshua, who was focused on looking at their friends, cherishing the moment as if it’d be the last time he’ll see him.
He just loved how enchanting Joshua looks tonight and the latter wasn’t even doing anything at the moment. It’s like even when Joshua breathes, it’s already fascinating for Jeonghan. He’s so whipped. Anyone can tell. He just loves this man in front of him so much. He can’t even put into words what he is feeling right now.
He wanted to grab his hand, intertwine it to his just like the old times. He wanted to wrap him around his embrace and just feel the other’s warmth, and just as Jeonghan’s eyes slowly looked down to Joshua’s lips, he just wanted to take him right there and then. Shower him with all the kisses he was unable to give for the past 2 years. He misses him so much!
Joshua turned to him and smiled, it was the most captivating smile he had ever seen. Yes, he might have seen Joshua laughing with his friends a while ago and smiling at the cab on their way here but this time, his smile was different. It’s that smile where Joshua’s eyes form into a crescent, where his cheeks start to puff, and his bunny teeth shows. It’s been a while since he saw that smile, the one that made him fall 7 years ago.
“Wanna dance?” Jeonghan looked him in the eye for a minute before taking his hand and pulling him to the dance floor.
Seungkwan went down the stage to dance with Vernon, while Seokmin started to sing a new song entitled Incredible by James TW.
You're wearing that dress I like
Those heels make you six feet high
Jeonghan and Joshua were silently dancing, still finding the courage to speak.
In the taxi you're trying to put your make-up on
While singing the words to your favourite song
“Oh, by the way, thanks for picking me up earlier, Hanie” Jeonghan was taken aback at what Joshua said. It’s been years since he heard that nickname and it still sounds wonderful coming from Joshua.
“Of course. Wouldn’t want you to get lost and kidnapped.” Joshua laughed. Jeonghan hasn’t changed. Still the silly guy he fell in love with.
My god, it's been awhile
Since the last time I saw you smile
They were quiet again but this time, both were staring in each other’s eyes as they slowly sway back and forth.
“When did you get back?” Joshua opened up because he wasn’t used to Jeonghan being quiet. Jeonghan is the type of person who’d always have something to say even in the most awkward situation, but not today. He was too mesmerized with the man in front of him that he got tongue tied.
“Landed last night. The gang was supposed to have a mini get together before the wedding but we weren’t complete so we didn’t push through and just decided to rest at the hotel”
Sometimes life gets so crazy that we can forget
All the little things we did back when we first met
Joshua felt a little guilty. He knows he’s the only one who wasn’t able to come last night since Jun and Wonwoo booked rooms for their friends so they could all go to the venue together.
“Hey. It’s okay! What’s important is you were able to come at the reception right? There’s nothing much in the church anyway” Jeonghan knows him too well even if he hasn’t said anything, Jeonghan already knew he was feeling down and guilty. And like always, he was there to lift his mood up.
Suddenly the room grows quiet, I'm lost in your eyes
It feels like we're all alone, as the lights go on
Silence engulfed them as they remained swaying staring at each other’s eyes.
Are you gonna stay now or will you still leave? Did you finally achieve your dreams after 2 years, hanie?
Do I still have a chance, shuji? Will you still take me back? Do you still love me or do you now have someone else?
There were so many questions and things they wanted to say but there was too little time.
It's getting late, wish we could stay like this forever
Dancing 'till both our feet ache
They both knew this night was not enough once they started opening up. So they decided to keep quiet for now and just let go for a moment and enjoy the night. They both know they’ll soon have the time to talk and settle these things out.
My love, nothing can break these arms
In your embrace, this crowded room doesn't matter
But dancing like it's our own stage
Joshua leaned in Jeonghan’s chest as they sway back and forth, not minding if there were other people staring at them. This is their moment and they won’t let anyone take it away from them.
My love, I just wanna say that you look incredible tonight
“You look incredible tonight, Shuji” Jeonghan whispered along with the lyrics as he placed his chin on top of Joshua’s head.
Joshua smiled as he wrapped his arms around Jeonghan’s waist. They were now embracing while dancing just like their first dance during their prom.
And all our friends are going home
Just leaving us all alone
Their friends started to go back to their table while the two of them remained dancing in the center.
Jeonghan was feeling like it was deja vu, and Joshua? He was already walking down memory lane.
-------FLASHBACK
“Shuji!!! Come dance with me!!” Jeonghan went to Joshua’s table to drag him to the dance floor.
“Hanie, I can’t” Joshua was sitting looking flustered. Jeonghan went down on his knees to face his boyfriend. He pulled his chin up and stared directly into his teary eyes. “What happened?”
“Someone spilled some blue lemonade on my suit.” Joshua pouted and he looked like he was about to cry. Jeonghan patted his shoulder, stood up and kissed his forehead.
“Don’t worry! No one will notice. Come on!” Jeonghan dragged him to the dance floor and a slow music played in the background.
Jeonghan didn’t think twice and pulled Joshua into a hug as he swayed both of them slowly. “W-what are you doing, Hanie? People are staring”
“I don’t care. They can stare as much as they want. I’m here to dance with my boyfriend”
“We’re not dancing, you’re just hugging me”
“It’s the best position to cover the stain on your suit so you won’t be embarrassed anymore.” Joshua looked up at Jeonghan and the latter looked back at him and smiled sweetly.
“Don’t worry babe. You still look incredible tonight!” Jeonghan kissed Joshua’s forehead and whispered an “I love you”. Joshua’s face immediately burned up and quickly looked away, which made Jeonghan chuckle at how cute his boyfriend was.
They’ve been together for 3 months now, but they weren’t really out since Joshua was scared of being judged. Only their closest friends knew and this was the first time they had a PDA in public. Joshua was really nervous at what other people might say but at the same time he felt safe around the arms of the person he loves the most? He had always wanted this.
Since that day, Joshua started to gain more confidence until their relationship was out in the public. Their friends have been as supportive as ever. Jeonghan even asked permission from Joshua’s parents and he also let his family meet Joshua. Everything was perfect.
Until they graduated college..
At first everything was tolerable despite the difference in their career. Jeonghan took over their company, while Joshua started working as an interior designer. They were happy even though they were seeing each other less often than they used to, but what’s a challenge two people who love each other cannot overcome, right?
Well, fate must have been really testing them because this time, Jeonghan was assigned to their company in Korea and he had to stay there for at least a year or two to get used to their branches. It took him months before he told Joshua. Well, actually it was only weeks before his flight when Jeonghan decided to tell Joshua the truth. Joshua’s hurt was an understatement.
He was mad, no scratch that, he was furious. How could Jeonghan keep this from him for months? It’s not like he’s going to stop him from going there. In fact, he’ll support him all the way. Joshua was not gonna hold Jeonghan back just because the latter’s gonna leave him alone here. Joshua definitely understands. It’s what makes Jeonghan happy. He knows how much Jeonghan has worked hard when he took over their company and his boyfriend loves what he does so Joshua wasn’t going to take that away from him.
But he could’ve at least told him in advance so he could have made adjustments to his schedule to be able to spend more time with his lover. Now it is only weeks before Jeonghan leaves and he can’t take any leave because their company just closed a deal with a very big client.
To cut it short, Jeonghan flew to Korea and just like any long distance relationship story, it was only good at the start. Eventually, video calls started to die down, updates were forgotten, and communication stopped. Until the day came where Joshua knew he had to confront Jeonghan that he can’t do it anymore. He’s not good at long distance relationships.
Jeonghan tried to beg for him to stay. He promised they’ll find a way to work it out, but Joshua knew it won’t be the same anymore. It was easy when Jeonghan was still in the same country as him, but being miles away sucks more than he expected it to be.
They ended things peacefully. No 3rd parties or falling out of love, simply just because they needed time to focus on each other’s career more and strictly for their individual growth. They both know that they still love each other very much but it was for the better.
------- END OF FLASHBACK
Joshua smiled at the bittersweet memory. He felt Jeonghan’s embrace tighten around his body. He missed this. He missed Jeonghan, he missed his warmth, his smell, his stares, his forehead kisses, he missed the only person he has ever loved.
And there's moments like this I never wanna let go
We're still those two kids putting on a show
Both of them snapped back to reality, when they heard cheers from the crowd, most especially coming from their friends. They slipped out of each other’s arms and looked around, they were the only people left on the dance floor and everyone was staring at them. Joshua’s face started to redden and Jeonghan embarrassingly scratched his nape.
“Omg! Joshua Hong! First you backed out at the last minute on being my best man and now you’re stealing my spotlight? Tsk. Tsk. I am really ready to disown you seriously. Anyone of you here wanna be my best friend?” Jun teased and everyone at the venue started laughing and clapping.
Luckily, there were just a few people left since most of the guests went home as it was already late.
Some of their friends went back to their hotel rooms and since Joshua still has an appointment with a client tomorrow he decided to go home rather than spend the night at the hotel. Jun was about to argue but Wonwoo held him back, so Jun had no choice but to let his best friend go.
“I’ll make it up to you Junnie, I promise.” Joshua pulled his best friend for a tight hug and whispered “I’m so happy for you” before letting go.
“Hey, Jeonghan! Take care of my best friend okay? Or else” Jeonghan laughed as Jun mouthed “you’re dead” before they left the hotel.
Jeonghan and Joshua walked side by side in silence. “Let’s have a drink?” Joshua blurted.
“You sure you can handle?” Joshua nodded “3 canned beers won’t hurt” he added.
They walked to the nearest convenience store and bought 6 cans of beer and started walking to the park. They roamed around, beer on hand, as they talked about anything under the moon.
When they finally finished the last can, they decided to go home.
Thank God they decided to go home because Joshua started to feel light headed. It’s been what? A year? since he drank, and 3 canned beers made him a little tipsy already.
Jeonghan noticed but didn’t mention anything. He just carefully eyed the other as they walked back home. Joshua’s apartment was just a few minutes walk from the park.
When Joshua almost bumped into someone, Jeonghan placed his arms around the former’s shoulder and didn’t let go until they were in front of Joshua’s door.
“Are you drunk, Shuji?” Joshua pouted. “Of course not” Jeonghan chuckled.
They both stayed there standing in front of each other and staring at each other’s eyes. No one dared to move.
Joshua looked at the person he missed the most. He looked at every feature in Jeonghan’s face, carefully memorizing it like he won’t be seeing it again for a long time. If all of these were a dream, he wishes he wouldn’t wake up. He felt water pooling in his eyes as he started to remember the pain of breaking up with him.
Jeonghan wiped the tear that left Joshua’s eyes and Joshua cherished the warm hand of his lover on his face. He missed his touch.
“Shhh” Jeonghan said as he kissed Joshua’s forehead and went down to kiss both his eyes, to the tip of his nose, and when he was about to go lower, he paused half an inch apart from Joshua’s lips that made the younger’s heart skip a beat. Jeonghan didn’t move, like he was waiting for the other’s consent.
As if time had stopped right there, as they stood in front of each other and Joshua leaned against his front door. It was a minute or two until Jeonghan’s soft lips brushed against him, finally. As always, Jeonghan’s simple touch sent shivers through his body. The familiar feeling of kissing Jeonghan was giving him butterflies in his stomach and making his knees weak. He missed this. He missed him so much.
Jeonghan kissed him gently, carefully, making all Joshua’s thoughts fade and before it could go anywhere else, Jeonghan snapped out of the haze and stepped back. Joshua still felt like he was in cloud nine as Jeonghan took a step back, “I-I’m sorry”
Joshua’s eyes opened wide when he realized what just happened. “N-No. It’s okay.” He shyly bowed his head.
“I think I should go, Shuji” Joshua looked at him with disappointed eyes but Jeonghan looked away. Joshua took advantage of the last time he could see Jeonghan’s face before he nodded “Yeah, I should head in too. Thanks, Hanie. Take care going back to the hotel.”
Joshua went in and propped himself at the back of door as he closed his eyes and thought what the hell just happened .
Jeonghan took off, the moment Joshua closed the door and he kept on smacking his forehead while he was on the elevator.
What have you done Yoon Jeonghan? You just threw your last hope of getting back with Joshua. Great.
Little did Jeonghan know, Joshua was also losing his mind at the moment.
Why the hell did he do that? Does it mean he still loves me? Or was he also drunk? UGH!! YOON JEONGHAN!!!!!
Joshua decided to take a cold showerr to relax.
Jeonghan went back to the hotel. He was sharing a room with Seokmin since everyone was with their boyfriends. The moment he went inside, he was surprised to see the younger one still awake.
“So what happened?” Seokmin excitedly asked. Jeonghan groaned as he plump down on his bed. “We kissed,” Jeonghan said with his face on the pillow.
“WHAT?!?! DID I HEAR THAT RIGHT?! YOU KISSED??!!” Jeonghan immediately stood up and covered Seokmin’s mouth. “SHHHHH”
“No one’s gonna hear us, hyung. What happened??” Seokmin sit up properly to hear the story.
Jeonghan ended up telling the everything to him from the park convenience store to the kiss on Joshua’s front door, and this were the only last words Seokmin said to him,
“Man up, hyung. Shua hyung obviously still loves you. After the show you put up a while ago on the dance floor, the way you both steal glances at each other, I can sense it. It’s still there, the chemistry never died. Forget all the regreets and what ifs, just go for it! Okay? I’m gonna sleep now. I’m so tired! Goodnight!”
Jeonghan reflected on Seokmin’s words while taking a shower.
The moment Joshua was ready to sleep, he received a text.
“ I’m really really sorry about what happened, Shuji. I didn’t mean it and I wanna make it up to you. Would you like to have breakfast with me tomorrow?”
Joshua smiled. Same old Jeonghan. He knows Jeonghan was not sorry at all. It’s just his way to ask Joshua out.
There’s no point in hiding anymore. He definitely missed the guy, so who is he to say no, right?
“ No thanks”
“JOSHUJIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!”