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English
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Published:
2020-08-26
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1,061
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1/1
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The Sad Blade of Lost Chivalry

Summary:

Sometimes, he had nightmares bad enough to wake him up, even when he was a Knight that feared nothing. Thing is, there is something he fears, because it already happened. Like any other night, it came back to haunt him again.

Or, Trevor has a rough sleep, and Rose tries to help.

Notes:

Like I s a i d I will singlehandedly keep this fandom alive until it rises to get the glory and attention it deserves. Also, THE TRAILER FOR BOOK TWO IS OUT AND I'M STILL YELLING the author picked the same date I did for publishing two drabbles and I'm ajdksjcksmcksk why.

This might sting a bit, but it's not as bad as my other fics,,, I promise,,, this is nicer?

Work Text:

There were flashes of light crossing his vision. The sound of yelling, two voices he knew perfectly accusing each other and driving him crazy. He saw the Moon shining, going through all of its phases in seconds, in light, in dark, in light, in dark, then a splash. He had fallen into the ocean. He was sinking. The water made the Moon look blurry, finally wiping it out the skies.

The sound of clashing swords, the crash of waves, a thunder cracking in the distance and the echo meddling with the world. He closed his eyes, struggling to get out of the water, but when he opened them again, he was laying flat on his back in the middle of the forest. But he wasn't safe yet. Something was wrong. All the trees, all the leaves, they were as still as a photo… as if there was no wind.

Cornelia screamed.


Trevor jolted awake, snapping his eyes open and sitting up faster than his body would've liked. He gasped for air, his hand instinctively going to his chest and pressing against the area where his heart should be. He could feel a cold sweat covering him, drops sliding down from his forehead and dripping from his chin.

Then he felt the hand.

ーDear?

He tried to take deep breaths, calming himself and closing his eyes to concentrate on that single task at hand. He gulped, his throat feeling terribly dry, before opening his eyes again and slowly moving away from his wife, intending to get up from the bed.

ーI'm… going for some water.ー he whispered, trying to keep his voice calm and steady.

Rose didn't take it.

ーSounds good.ー she said, suddenly getting the bedsheets off her and sitting on the edge, putting on her comfiest shoes and ignoring Trevor's wide eyes staring at her.

ーWhat are you doing?

ーI want some water too.ー a flat answer.

ーI… Rose, I can bring you a glass. You don't have to get up.

ーHmm, let me think it over. Ok. No.

Trevor opened and closed his mouth, as if wanting to argue, but realizing it was a bad idea. This was Rose he was talking about.

He couldn't argue with such a woman.

Ignoring her husband and his comical expressions, like a gaping fish out of the water, Rose stood up and quietly walked to the kitchen, taking some additional time to check on her children while on her way there. Victoria seemed to be sleeping well, and Max, of course, looked like an absolute angel dreaming the sweetest things, or so she hoped.

Once she found the cups, maneuvering like the skilled mother she was in the absolute darkness of the kitchen, she took no time in heating up the water and finding her favorite herbs.

By the time Trevor recomposed himself and caught up to her, she was already serving their tea on the table, giving her husband a murderous smile and silently urging him to sit down.

ーRose, we're going to wake them up.ー he whispered, doing his best to move the chair and sit on it without making a sound.

ーNot if we talk like this.ー she whispered back.

Trevor sighed.

ーI can't lie to you, can I?

ーYou would've done it, if not because you were tossing in your sleep and muttering things.

She didn't see him going red.

ーS-sorry. I hope I didn't smack you by accident like that other time.

ーIt's alright, sweetie.

They fell into a strange silence, not awkward, but not right either. They both took a sip out of their drinks, and Rose hummed at the relaxing taste. Trevor didn't give any evident reaction.

ーYou made a calming one again.

ーIt's the one you need right now, hm?

He huffed softly and looked away. She frowned, showing the slightest signs of worry.

ーAnother nightmare, darling?

He nodded, then realized she probably couldn't see him well in the shadows.

ーYeah… I think so. You know I don't quite remember any of my dreams.

ーDo you know what it was about, at least?

ーHm… the Moon was there.ー Trevor tried to squint at his memory. ーI think I was drowning at some point, but…

ーWas Emily there again? It would make sense, if you saw the Moon…

He gulped. God, his throat was still dry.

ーEmily was there, I heard her voice… and…

He trailed off, not knowing how to continue, and not feeling up for continuing the conversation. Trying to dissimulate his conflicted emotions, he took another sip at his tea.

Rose hummed to herself again, slumping her shoulders and leaning back on the chair. She wished she could do more for her beloved, more than simply comforting him with some magically calming tea and empty conversations. Trevor had many regrets inside of him, she knew of them, she knew of how often they manifested as nightmares, and lately, they had become increasingly more frequent, to the point of gifting him some nice looking bags under his eyes. Honestly, he was lucky they didn't look ugly on him, unlike hers, which she had to hide with some make up.

ーI heard her scream.ー he whispered, suddenly.

Rose frowned, painfully aware of what he meant.

ーYou have to stop thinking you could've done something to save her, dear…

ーI can't. I just can't.ー he shook his head as he spoke, his voice tight, a knot probably in his throat. ーEvery time I swing my blade thinking about protecting you, she comes back to the front of my mind.

ーTrevor…

ーI couldn't protect her. It doesn't matter how much I do. I already failed as a Knight.

She fell silent with him. Truly, she wanted to argue and tell him everything he did was more than enough, that his honor as a Knight wasn't tainted in any way, that his chivalry remained clean, perfect and untouched.

But this time, this time she knew her words would fall on deaf ears. There were things she couldn't change in Trevor's mind. After one too many nights trying, Rose realized there was no way she could ever fill the void left by Cornelia with mere words. She couldn't bring back the dead to help her husband heal.

His was a broken blade no smith would ever be able to repair.