Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

IT FELT LIKE HIS BODY WAS MELTING

Grace help me, Grace please help me

There was a large puddle beneath him that wasn't water, a puddle that used to be a part of him.
Painpainpainpain.
HIS BODY WAS ON FIRE He was screaming, screaming like he never had before, tears of fear, of agony, streamed from his eyes that meet the eyeless beast of the ghom.
His feet pitifully scratching at the floor, to no avail.
pain.. PAIN IT HURT PLEASE DEAR GOD SOMEONE HELP ME.
ITHURTSOBADMORETHANANYTHINGHEHADEVEREXPERINCED KILLMEKILLMEKILLMEKILLME
AUNT FLORA!?!?! UNCLE SABASTION?!?!? MOM?!? DAD?!?! ...SAMANTHA? His body was coming undone, unraveling like a simple wax sculpture.
His fingers, his legs, his back, everything was MELTING
The flush fell off his bones, in liquid clumps, splattering all over the little bridge he was on. He screamed.
It felt like this was happening for hours, but really it was only a few agonized seconds, then there was nothing.
Not life, not death, nor afterlife, just nothing.
.....
.............
..................
..........................
Simon wasn't even consciously aware of anything any longer and even if he was It wouldn't matter.
His fractured, corrupted soul had long left his body, attempting to float down, before a glowing blue field stopped it.
The train couldn't allow it to leave.
This soul was still a passenger, a passenger that hadn't learned his lesson hadn't earned his exit ticked.
He wasn't going anywhere.
That was far too merciful.
The soul was jerked back to the train, thrashing, and twitching as if to try and get away from its hold.
The train didn't let go.
Passengers couldn't leave, and this one wasn't going anywhere.
Physical form or no physical form he wasn't going anywhere.
But then... what to do with the soul?
They couldn't just restrict him here forever, no real good would come out of it and this one deserved a whole new kind of lesson.
Death was far and few when it came to the train, most of them accidents.
Crushed, mangled, eaten alive, falling burning, ripped to tiny bits, but very few quite like this, very few with circumstances like this soul.
Assault, murder, attempted murder, harassment, vandalism, the list went on.
It had watched him do all this impassively.
Should it give the soul the same treatment as the others then?
It would mean he would no longer be a passenger any longer, but like the others, he could learn and that was what was most important to the train.
It was a shame to lose a passenger in such a way once again, but the train supposed this was a very fitting lesson for the soul.
A singular one that would last forever.
He had destroyed so many of the trains wonderful denizens, after all, the train supposed he would make for a nice replacement.
The train merely wondered if the soul would end up as one of the feral ones, or if he would do what he should have done in the first place.
What a waste though.. what a waste indeed, yet another passenger had been lost, their body, numbers gone just like that.
This one's body was quite literally only a dust pile now.
Hmmm oh well, at least this soul was useful for teaching the trains other passengers a proper lesson, It would help them get their exit a lot faster than they would otherwise.
The soul swirled in the trains grasp, still thrashing like a dying fish.
The train gazed at him for a moment, focusing a good amount of its willpower on the thing and to the newest empty denizen.
It founded it quickly, a very small white cat denizen.
A 'kitten' as the train's passengers called it, the creatures lifeless, let alive body just being pumped out, the fluid sack around it quickly dripping away.
The train momentarily stopped the inputting of the things new consciousness, this was it then, everything was ready.
The train looked at the broken soul one last time, his cracks pulsating at the train, wishing a silent goodbye for the loss of a passenger, and a wish for him to learn before sending it away.
The souls light flickering rapidly as it was suddenly pulled away from the caboose it was hovering over, still unable to get away, get down, as it zoomed faster and faster past hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of other train cars.
All going by in a flash of color, the train dragging him faster than anything ever known to soul.
Going and going and going and going, until it rather jerkily stopped right above a very ordinary-looking caboose and was slowly dragged down into it, a very large snowy forest-like place with upsidedown trees and mountains, just in time for the denizen shell to splat into the snow.
Chest rising and falling, but with no life in its eyes, the wet slimy fluid making its fur slick.
The soul fought back vigorously as if somehow aware of what was about to happen to him, but was no match for the train as it effortlessly rammed it inside its new body.
The kittens form convolved violently, its form bulging in odd places, eyes glowing and close to popping straight out of its skull.
A terrified and pain-filled screech leaving it's maw that was omedently halted as blood gurgled in its throat.
The train let it struggle for a moment, waiting for the soul to set.
It's thrashing only getting worse, as it clawed at the floor blindly, fur fluffing up and tail going between its legs.
Veins showing up against its skin and muscles bulging, more blood pouring from its eyes, nose, and fluffy ears turning its fur red.
Still yowling, still screaming, seizing on the floor.
The train felt little to nothing, it had seen this before after all, it found passenger's souls never liked it when they were crammed into something unfamiliar, it often made them go completely insane, but the train supposed this was part of the lesson.
A very good lesson at that.
After a while of this thrashing and wailing (nothing to the trains part) the soul gave up, it's fight, submitting to its new body leaving the denizen out could and whimpering softly.
That was surprisingly fast...
His mind might still even be in tack, then again remembering what the train had seen him do before his demise that probably wasn't saying much.
The train guessed that didn't matter though, the deed was done and it was no longer needed here, it was really always watching anyhow.
And so the train left the denizen without care, going back to its regular duties, abandoning the denizen as he had been in the past by countless others.
~
He was nine
running with eyes full of salty, bitter tears as far away from the brick house as possible, his aunt's words ring In his ears.
The nice officers that had given him a sticker and bandaged up his wounds, (but for some reason hadn't let him but his sneakers on so he was forced to go in his dumb sanadles) had brought him hear so suddenly, so out of the blue and dropped him off hear after chatting with his aunt and uncle. He hadn't gotten the chance to tell his mom and dad he was sorry. "I..It's okay now Simon sweetheart, they can't hurt you ever again, were going to take care of you alright? and I promise we would never hurt you."
He didn't understand... why was he being taken away from them?
Did they.. not want him anymore!?
Gotten rid of him like they had threatened almost constantly?!
The boy choked on another sob, running further and further away from his aunt's house, away from his problems away from it all.
away, away, away.
Like the hero's in his storybooks, running away from their life to a new place, better places, and a new life.
Except in Simons cases, he was running away from his 'new' life, from his apparent 'better place.'
He loved his aunt and uncle, but he didn't want to live with them!!!
He didn't understand.. why didn't his mom and dad want him anymore, why had they finally ABANDONED him?!?!
Simon cried in frustration, in confusion, running faster than he ever had before into the empty little town, and down, down, down, or suspiciously empty subway.
He was too distraught to wonder why no one was around, it wasn't that late after all.
His eyes blurred with tears, crying out as his foot slipped on the last steep sending the small boy crashing painfully onto the concrete floor of the subway, skiing his arm and knee as his body slid across it.
Simon tasted the coppery taste of blood in his mouth, sniffling pathetically as he lied there for a moment, curing up into a little ball.
He felt no real need to get up.
Why bother?
The tears flowed a little faster down his cheeks, this whole situation stinging ten times more than some scrapes ever could.
His didn't want to leave his parents, he didn't want to leave, his parent he didn't want to leave his parents.
He loved them! but... they didn't love him back, he wasn't sure if they ever did.
They don't want you, Siman, why would they? you're weak! Your worthless, you are NOTHING.
"S..stop it!!" he yelled out loud, digging his nails into his hair as if trying to rip away at the self hatting thoughts in his head, "they don't want you and either does your aunt and uncle they'll get a clue and get rid of you eventually too!! Your good for nothing! Good for no one!! They were right not to want you!"
The child's nails dug in deeper, no..no! he didn't want any of this! He wanted this all to stop!! He didn't want any of this to happen! It wasn't fair!! It wasn't fair!! He.. he just wanted to get away!
As if responding to his demands, the soft chugging of a train, followed by a sharp whiled, cut his thighs off making him jerk to a half-sitting position.
"W..what?" the little boy gasped, his mouth falling open in an almost comical fashion as his eyes landed on the beautiful, red locomotive stopped right in front of him on the rails a subway would normally be, it's doors wide open as if welcoming him inside.
I was.. such a wonderful looking train to Simon something straight out of one on his storybooks, something like the polar express!
He hardly registered it when he stood up and took a step towards the wonderful train.
He half wondered if there was hot chocolate on it, if this train was for him with an amazing destiny waiting for him.
One where he was a hero, where he saved the world, and everyone loved him like they didn't here.
He had just taken another few steeps about to grab the golden handrail to steep abord when he passed, wait.. was this really such a good idea?
The boy knew you shouldn't just hop aboard things when you didn't know where they were going, he hadn't even seen this strange train arrive at the station!
It was stranger danger 101!
...but
This train seemed to be outside anything human, outside this dimension, this multiverse.
Something this beautiful couldn't be bad!
It had to be destiny then!
His fate..
It was his chance to escape from this, and Siman didn't want to waste it.
Taking a deep breath, the boy finally grasped the handrail and border the infinity train.
~
The only thing that Simon could register when he worked up from what felt like years on sleep was that everything hurt badly.
His entire form throbbed and ached like he had been hit by not just one but eight busses.
The young man's underbelly and palms of his hands and feet freezing in the snow he was lying in.
His muscles all collectively cramped, his skin burred like the worst sunburn imaginable, even every hair on his body stung.
Simon grounded, confused for a moment what had happened.
He spat out a mouth full of blood, all too aware of the warmth of more of it as it rolled down his ears and nose.
Simon snorted a nose full of it out, blicking back the red of his vision.
He had.. he was fighting with Grace, no the traitor, they had almost fallen, she had grabbed one of his boots then it was his turn to fall, Grace had grabbed him, he had kicked her, his emotions realing, he remembered laugh, crying a mix of emotions flooding him his heat tearing and breaking yet feeling so thrilled, so excited then.. then..
what had happened?
He punished the traitor, then?
..? He didn't remember.. and certainly didn't remember how he had gotten hurt, or how he had wounded up where ever he was.
Some kind of weird snowy forest?!
The young man fumed, who had done this?!
Was it the traitor, had she.. done something to him!?
With a snarl that didn't sound right to his ear (that didn't feel right either), he sat up or at least tried to..
His body it wasn't moving correctly... Wavering and shaking as he tried to sit up normally, sending waves of pain up his form.
Simon bit back a mewl, his ears twitching in aggravation, putting a numb hand in front of him to steady himself when his blood rain cold.
where his hand should have been was a white fluffy paw, no numbers insight.
His pupils become more slit than they already were.
Fur... and a paw.. wh.. WHAT!?!??!! His ears ducked back and puffy tail fluffed up, his panicked yowl rigging through the forest that caused a certain little girl and a much older woman to raise their heads to it as the little animal little ways a way panicked on, so panicked so confused. This couldn't be real, It wasn't possible.. he couldn't be.. could be a.. He tried to stand, but not being used to his body only managed to fall again, getting a nose that was already bloody full of snow and grass, the world spinning and spinning, his shock, the pain everything making his chest tight. He struggled to get, up, but his legs still weren't working!! What.. what had they DONE to him!?!?! "I..am I a fucking cat?!?!" he mewled, his voice a lot higher than it rightfully should be and shaking ever so slightly with an emotion Simon refused to acknowledge. His body shook with a mix of emotions, denial wanting to force it's away out of his maw, but was proof was right in front of him WAS him. Fate... so have it, must really be real after all, after Simon had given up on it years ago. Fate was showing herself She was just a massive bitch.

Chapter Text

he fat icy drops of snow were still falling around Siman as the new denizen gawked at himself in mutilated horror, still unbelieving that this new form was really his.
If he was still really him.
He fought back the urge to scream again and slowly looked over ‘his’ body, shaking his head rapidly all the while.
His fur was long and silky, as well as literally dripping with a mysterious goo for reasons he didn’t understand, large strands of clear fluid dripping from the blond strands and on the snowy floor.
The stench of it wafting into his new, more sensitive nose.
Like chemicals, lemon, and a hint of something he couldn’t quite pin down.
He glanced behind him where a long fully Thi he extended from behind him swayed.. He even had a tail.
A TAIL.
Siman felt dizzy, his little body swaying back and forth, dangerously close to fainting from the shock.
His chest tightened up, even more, tears starting to build in the corners of his eyes.
No..no..no..
How had this happened?!?!
How?!?
The train was full of almost unlimited possibilities, but this!?
His body being changed so drastically?!
This couldn’t be!
He let out another frustrated yowl not noticing it as the snow on the mountains shook above him.
No.. he couldn’t he.. Couldn’t be like this!
He was human! Not some pathetic cat!
Hot a null.
He wasn't an animal!
Human!!
Human…
He, he was human, he was, he was..
Siman glanced hatefully down at his paws, his lips curling back.
He WASN’T supposed to have these.
With a snarl, he opened his maw about to sink his teeth in his paw, but the sudden movement quickly threw him off balance, getting a mouth full of snow as he fell hard on his face.
“RAWWWRRER!” He screamed out, slamming his paws into the ground like a small child throwing a tantrum.
The sound causing even more snow, fall from the mountain.
He attempted to claw at his fur, pull it out with his claws, but only managed to lightly paw at it, he didn’t understand how to let out his claws after all.
It wasn’t fair!
It wasn’t fair!!
He hadn’t done anything to deserve this!!
He hadn’t.. He hadn’t done anything wrong!
Simon’s tail beat at the ground in agitation, no he didn’t..
Someone had unfairly done this to him!
To stop him..
To take control.
To HURT him.
Hurt him.
Hurt him.
Hurt him.
Hurt him.
They wanted to hurt him.
His thrashing and child-like whining stopped.
The fear slowly disputed, replaced with the familiar emotion of rage and anger.
Grace.
She was the one that must have done this to him.
His old friend was the last thing he remembered before he woke up here.
She had betrayed him again and somehow did this to him.
Perhaps by going as far as to team up with the false conductor.
He bristled with ager.
Yes, that’s what must have happened!
As always it was always HER fault!!
The loudest cry yet let left his mouth, one of so much pain, so much betrayal, yet so much rage and malice.
A cry that didn’t merely make the snow fall, but made the entire train car seem to shake, the snow falling off in large globs around it.
The animal’s heart skipped a beat
He had caused the start of some kind of avalanche..
Crap.
Siman made a small noise of alarm, stumbling over his paws like a newborn fowl, as more and more snow glops splattered on to the floor, about the size of a fairly large house.
It was so close..
If something that big fell on him, especially with how he was now, it would most definitely break his neck or at the least suffocate him in it.
He had to get out of here!
NOW.
The animal tried to instinctively raise to his back legs, but of course fell back to the floor almost instantly, his balance more off than it had ever been before.
Cats weren’t meant to walk like that after all.
Not like humans could.
He was quick to get up, jumping back just in time to avoid yet another large pile of snow falling on his head, fur fluffing up so much he more resembled a large cotton ball than any kind of cat.
With a fearful meow, he quite literally turned tail and ran, or well ran as best he could with a body he had no clue how to control.
Stumbling and tripping multiple times over paws, even falling a few more times as snow continued to fall.
The adrenaline pumping in his veins did wonders, running at a surprising speed through the excessively large train car, the exit, a tree, anything safe, he had to get away from all these mountains!
The car seemed to go on forever, his little limbs beginning ache, his lungs screaming for release.
Siman didn’t dare even pause, do as little as look back, dashing through this death trap of a train car with still no end in sight.
He felt like he was running for about thirty minutes..
With most train cars he would at least seen something in the distance after running for so long, so where the hell was.. Well, anything!?
Was it all on the damn roof with the mountains?!
Was there nothing on the ground?
Still, he ran.
He couldn’t die, not like this, not while he looked like this!
Not in such a weak, pathic fashion!
That would mean Grace would win..
She would corrupt the others, warp the Apex into thinking her way, into turning against him.
This sent a new burst of energy through him, speeding up, tripping a little less over his paws as he did so.
His breathing coming out raspy and frantic, everything going by in a blur of white, all too aware of the sound of serval heavy things falling right behind him.
He was so focused on running in fact, Siman almost missed it when a large shadow formed over him cast by something far above him, getting bigger by the second as it propelled itself closer.
Damn it!!
He struggled to run faster, to dodge out of the way, but the snow ball was just too large, to close, getting closer and closer to him as Siman’s legs burned trying to get away, the snow just barely brushing on his back, before the whole world flipped over.
Gravity reversing on itself, pulling the cat to the roof of the train car along with the falling snow.
Siman was too shocked to try digging his nonworking claws into the floor, flailing in midair as he was launched into the air or more.. At the ground now.
Falling within mid-air faster and faster towards the unforgiving ground, looking around quickly for anything that would slow his fall.
Mountains, those would kill him for sure, he would fall right through the snow and suffocate and the trees..
Siman had only a few seconds to decide, making his decision to aim his little body into the large trees.
They would stop or at least delay his fall, he just had to be careful and try to fall in the mastiff amounts of leave, if he fell on one of the branches, he could differently break something maybe even his neck or back.
Where if he was lucky he would die instantly, or fall to the snow unable to move and die slowly and painfully.
His heart plummeted in fear, something in his gut dropping at plummeted to the trees, only just arriving over the trees, before his body made contact with the top of the tree.
Falling through the smaller branches, that cut into his flank effectively slowing down his fall is only by a little, continuing to scratch, some of them cutting worryingly deep as he fell further down the tree.
He had made it past the top, but things only got more painful from there, his body tumbling down to a branch, landing on his side hard, leaving his gasping, unable to get his breath back as he fell to the next branch on his shoulder, pain shooting up that area.
Crying out in pain as he slammed his chest on the next branch, then his tail, then his side again, then the head.
All these painful falls must have been enough to slow his fall, hitting the next branches with less and less force until he landed on a rather large branch and this time didn’t fall off it.
His body started to slide before Siman quickly angled himself, grabbing the branch best he could without using his claws or any other proper grip.
His little limbs wrapping around it, entire frame shaking from the pain he was currently under and the shock and terror for almost meeting his demise.
His entire body hurt even more than it already did, which was saying a lot, he wasn’t even sure how bad he was hurt or even if he had fractured or pulled something, but he was alive..
That was something he guessed.
It took a while for the kitten to get his breath back, grasping the tree branch for dear life.
His lungs burning as he lied there gasping in the fresh oxygen until his uneasy breathing returned to normal.
Even with this, he didn’t dare let go or even try to sit upon the tree.
Even with how far he had fallen the ground was still far enough down that falling to it wouldn’t be pleasant.
That has been way too close for comfort for Siman.
He had been so close to getting hit with one of those giant snowballs, from hitting the ground when he was flying in the air..
Had.. Grace intended this?!
She already turned him into a damn cat, but was she also intentionally trying to kill him by putting in this train car?!
It was possible if she was teamed up with one-one.
“Y..you think you can kill me that easy! Well, you're going to have to try a lot harder than that!!” He squeaked aloud.
He got no reply of course except a small humming noise that resigned from the train itself.
He sneered as much as a cat could sneer pushing back the fear still churning in his gut.
This was just great, how was he going to even get down now?!
He still didn’t know how to control his damn claws.
His teeth?
No.. that definitely wouldn’t work.
He couldn’t just stay here either!
Who knew when this place would randomly flip again...
If it did that he was going to die..
He could try and slowly jump on the branches down, but that was risky too.
Then again what other chance did he have?
Siman shakily sighed, wiggling his way back to the trunk of the tree, his legs still around the branch.
First thing first, to even jump down he was going to need to stand up on this damn branch.
He swallowed back his fear one again, trying to focus on his sneering rage for those who had done him harm.
He would get off this tree..
Get off it and out of this cart, find Grace.. And make her PAY.
Make her SUFFER like he was.
Siman didn’t currently know how exactly he was going to make her pay, make her hurt, and scream and BEG ON HER DAMN KNEES, he was only about a foot tall after all..
He might have to wait until he got his actual body back or just pounce on her when she was asleep even if his teeth were small he would be able to rip the sensitive part of her neck out..
The thought, the image almost made him smile and gave him what he needed to slowly stand up.
The branch was thick enough for him not to waver too badly, looking down to the branch closest to him.
It wasn’t too far down, the jump wouldn’t be too hard, really anyone could manage it, he just had to be careful not to slip up at all.
He did and it would literally be the death of him.
Siman failed to hear a small rustling noise behind him as he crouched to the floor about to jump when; “HELLO THERE NEW FURRY FRIEND!”
An annoying high pitched voice only a new inches from his ear, nearly making him jump yelled, swinging his head around to see a very odd-looking creature, with its long tail wrapped around the higher branch next to him.
It was almost bright yellow with speckles of black and looked like an odd mix of a bunny, squirrel, and porcupine.
Sharp quills covering it’s back, with long rabbit ears and paws and a very large squirrel tail that was about twice the size of it.
Siman growled softly, a denizen.
Of course, there was one here, those vermin were everywhere, he was surprised he hadn’t seen one sooner.
He could already feel himself baring his teeth, “What, do you want null?!”
The creature blinked at him, “null?! That is not my name, you silly, silly feline!! Not my name at all, no, no!! My lovely name is Springer!! Springer is my name and you!?”
“That’s none of your business!” he snapped, his entire form tensing up, wishing more than ever he could use his claws, so he could rip this stupid little thing to bits.
Its body bobbed from where it was swinging, “That’s quite a strange name!! A strange name indeed!!”
“That’s not that I meant, you retard!” he spat.
This thing was even more useless than most other nulls.
It was.. Stupid than most the others.
Must be broken.
Somehow Siman could feel himself become more disgusted in it.
The hybrid cocked its head to an unnatural angle, “huhhhhhhhhh?!”
“Ugh, never mind just stay the hell away from me, you don’t and I’ll come back then I get my body back and rip your damn head off.”
The Null’s large ear twitched before breaking into very unsettling laughter that lasted a little too long, “That's a funny joke!! You're very funny! Very funny indeed!!”
This time Siman snarled at them, “I mean it, get lost!”
The creature seemed to finally get it, its expression falling, “Oh.. well, alright then!! I wish you luck at that door of yours then!!”
Wait.. the door
It said that like it knew where it was at!
“Ugh! Hey wait, how do you know about that!”
“Well of course because the door is right next to me and my siblings, wonderful home you see!! It’s very pretty! Very shiny!”
Siman’s mind pondered for a moment.
It knew exactly where the door was then?
Maybe this dumb little thing could prove some use after all.
Normally Siman would never in a million years even consider it, but he needed to get to that door as soon as possible, to get his body back to get revenge.
He had worked with Nulls in the past away way, he could deal with this one, let it take him to the door then rip it’s throat clean out with his teeth, push it off the tree… watch its tiny body go limp and start moving.
It was even smaller than him, he was sure it would be easy.
It might even cheer him up with everything going on…
“Tha.. ugh, you think you could show me the way there, I need to get to the door as soon as I can, there's something I need to do..”
“Really oh really? The door? You? But how will you open the wonderful door without proper human thumbs!?”
“Shut it! I’ll figure that out when I get to it! Just show me where the damn door is okay?!” he snapped, fighting back any worry this question brought.
What was he going to do?
The door was so large compared to him now the handle was so high and..
He shook his head, no..
He couldn't think about that right now, he needed to focus on balancing on this tree, as he said to the null he could cross that bridge when he came to it.
“Okay!! I will oblige!! Of course, I will oblige! Just follow me! Follow me young cat and I will show you!! I will! Just remember to hold on to the tree with your tail when the world flips again!”
Under his fur Siman paled, “but hey, I can’t-”
Before he could finish the null was already swinging off at a surprising speed.
“Wait up!” he hissed in alarm, immediately starting after the null and to the door, to his revenge.