Work Text:
"It was a good talk, then?"
Jester looks towards Caleb, slightly surprised as she sits breathless on the sand in front of the bonfire. The music and laughter from the dance she emerged from drowned out Caleb's inquiry, so she scoots closer to him.
She could see him flinch slightly and for a moment she considers backing away. Caleb had a frustrating habit of leaving very suddenly when she got too close and she didn't want to scare him away, not this time.
But the calm expression doesn’t leave his face so instead she smiles and leans ever so closer. "Oh, it was just lovely, Caleb. One of our best talks in a while." She laughs a bit too loudly -- maybe nerves, maybe the euphoria of the dance still raging, maybe to make sure Caleb would be absolutely totally sure she was okay.
Absolutely, she thinks, to draw that startled smile from Caleb's face. He looks off, thoughtful, formulating a response and Jester waits. She keeps close to him, not wanting to miss his soft reply. She draws a breath, taking in the scent of sea and smoke and she isn’t sure whether she’s taking in the bonfire or Caleb but regardless she feels warm.
Finally, he looks back at her. "I do hope you got things sorted, Jester. Or... at least, somewhat more sorted than before. I know how special the Traveler is to you."
His smile fades, slightly concerned, and Jester feels her stomach drop because it was a lovely talk, it really was. But... things don't wrap up that easily, not like in books. She's still going to miss him, she's still going to resent him, just a little, and--
Her face must have given her away because Caleb frowns and looks off, thinking again and damn it -- she sighs and puts a smile back on, a little less frantic than the one before.
"I ah, don't mean to bring down the mood, Jester, if you want to save this for another time..."
Another time. Jester's smile grows a bit more and Caleb looks almost -- bashful? -- At his insinuation. A weird reaction, Jester thinks, when Caleb is the first person she thinks of when she wants to talk things out. But then again, Caleb has always been a little bit weird.
Jester just shakes her head, glancing down at Caleb's hands. Would he mind if she held them again? She fidgets with the hem of her dress.
"No, no. Well, yes, but! You're not bringing the mood down, of course not! I was just thinking..."
She pauses, glancing up at Caleb then back down to her hands. His gaze is straight on her, astute and sharp but so patient, so patient. It's such a warm night. "I'm glad he's doing what he wants to do, you know? He's done so much for me, my whole life, and for so many other people now too! I'm happy that he's going to be happy now, but... he's going to be happy without me."
She pauses to sigh again, slumping a bit, and Caleb's eyes soften as he nods. He understands. Of course he does.
"And you feel selfish for wanting more from him, ja?"
She nods rapidly, letting out a frustrated noise. "Yeah! Exactly! It's like, I know he has a lot of shit going on but, come on man! Sometimes I wish..."
That things can be back to the way they were before. But that's definitely a thought for later. Not when there's sand all over her, and strangers everywhere, and not when Caleb looks at her so softly she can't imagine going back to a time before someone would look at her like that.
She's so fixated on his eyes, bright blue framed by flaming hair in the amber light that she doesn't notice his hand reaching out to pat her shoulder until it does. She watches his hands return to his lap and hers twitch in response.
And suddenly she's so focused on how hot her face is that she doesn't realize she's opened her mouth to speak until she does. "I-I do feel bad that I'm going to see him less. I mean, we are best friends and everything but -- I think I'll be okay."
Jester smiles at Caleb, and they both let out a breath in tandem. "I have you, of course."
Caleb clears his throat, looking away, and Jester isn't sure why she picked now of all times to tease him but there, she said it, and she tries to pretend she wants to laugh at his reaction.
"You, ah... you know you have all of us," he finally says, gesturing vaguely towards the crowd surrounding them. And of course Jester knows that, but...
He adds, far too quietly for her to hear had she not already been painfully close -- "But, of course. You'll always have me, Jester."
It's Jester's turn to clear her throat now -- there is a lot of smoke in the air after all -- but her smile widens and she looks around at the revelry and at the glowing green gate now part of the village forever, bold and bright and beautiful despite the modest impression the huts around them give off.
And as her eyes settle back on Caleb, she can only think of how much that reminds her of the wizard who created it. She says (for the hundredth time she thinks), "Thank you Caleb. For... For everything."
He rubs the back of his neck, looking off. "I... yes. Anytime. But ah..."
His eyes dart around, and Jester recognizes the look. She'll be wishing him good night any moment now. She hesitates only a moment before taking his hand, and he freezes, looking down to watch her fingers just barely wrap around his. It's loose and awkwardly positioned, more than easy to pull away if he wanted to. But he doesn't.
He looks up at her and takes a deep breath. "Do you... want to dance? For old time's sake."
Her eyes widen in delight and he smiles weakly, eyes not quite meeting hers. And it feels like she's struck by a bolt of lightning, ready to jump back into the crowd and lose herself again but with him--
Then their fingers settle together, and she can feel his skin under her thumb, so soft and delicate but heavily scarred, and she realizes she doesn't want to be distracted from this. Not yet, at least.
She shakes her head, grin settling down to a content smile. "Oh, we'll definitely be dancing soon, Caleb. But for now, do you want to just sit with me? My feet are killing me!"
She giggles at how clever her excuse is and he gives her a fond smile that remains on his face as she scoots just a bit closer. Only so they can hold hands more comfortably, of course.
She doesn't have to wish him good night for a quite a while longer this time.