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Usually it was once or twice a week. During particularly stressful weeks, it would happen three or four times, but it hadn't happened in a month. Yunho would regress to help with his stress, but he hadn't for a while. Yunho was stressed and the others could tell, the stress painted on his face through dark eyes and a permanent frown. Yet he wouldn't slip. No one tried to force him to, or asked him why he didn't, out of fear of making him uncomfortable, but they were concerned. Yunho would stay in his room when anyone else regressed, avoiding them at all costs.
He didn't talk about it either. Acted like it was fine when there obviously something on his mind. He would see Wooyoung being carried around by one of the members as he was babied and Yunho would just stare before walking off into the other room. He meant no harm when he did so, he just felt something inside of him when he watched the others being picked up.
Maybe it was jealousy, envy, or even sadness. He was never picked up by the others. They said he was too big to be picked up. That made him a bit insecure. He felt too tall to be little, not like Hongjoong or Wooyoung who could be carried around without much effort. He wanted to be carried around too, made to feel small like the others, but he didn't want to bother them.
This insecurity drove him away from regressing. That's how he ended up in his room, trying his best not to slip after seeing Yeosang and Wooyoung regress. He'd watched Wooyoung being carried around by Seonghwa and Jongho. It made him feel jealous.
He sat in his room and pouted, holding his covers close in a bundle as he didn't want to hold his dog stuffie in fear of slipping. But he couldn't stop it and his head went fuzzy with the familiar feeling. He hated being alone while little, but he couldn't help it. He let out a whine and looked at his stuffie.
"Don' wanna be tiny." He muttered to himself quietly as tears came to his eyes. But he knew that the headspace wasn't going to go away. He picked up the stuffie and crawled under his covers as he began to cry. "Too big to be tiny." He cried, hugging the dog to his chest tightly. He cried for a while, not realising how much time passed by, babbling to himself and softly crying. He didn't even flinch when his door opened. Seonghwa stepped in, ready to call Yunho out for dinner.
Seonghwa froze as he heard crying and babbling, his face falling from the smile on his lips, being replaced with a frown. He slowly stepped over to Yunho's bed and crouched down, placing a hand over the lump of covers, receiving a sharp gasp. Yunho sobbed even harder after being startled. He didn't want to look at who it was. He didn't want to bother them with his tears and his problems, so he bit onto his stuffie to try and keep himself quiet.
"Yunho?" Seonghwa's soft voice chimed out. Yunho didn't answer. "Darling, what's wrong?" He tried again. When Yunho didn't answer, Seonghwa simply rubbed his back soothingly to comfort the boy. It took a bit, but eventually Yunho stopped crying. Seonghwa slowly pulled back the covers, revealing Yunho's tear stained face. Yunho covered his face with his stuffie and whined. "What's wrong, sugar?" Seonghwa asked. Yunho just sniffled. "Don't wanna talk?" Yunho shook his head. "Too small to talk?" Yunho sniffed and tears fell from his eyes again. "Oh, baby-"
"No!" Yunho cried out, turning his back on Seonghwa and pulling the covers over his head again. Seonghwa sighed.
"Yunnie..." Seonghwa said quietly. Yunho sniffed and tried to cover up his crying again. Seonghwa could see him shaking from under the covers from how hard he was trying to keep in his heavy breaths. When Seonghwa put his hand on Yunho's back again and the regressor flinched. "Please tell mama what's wrong, little one." That name struck something in Yunho and he suddenly stopped trying to hold back his tears. He turned over and poked the top of his head out, tear filled eyes peaking out at Seonghwa.
"Mama..." Yunho said in a quiet, saddening tone. Seonghwa truly hated to see the boys like this. It hurt to see them upset, especially Yunho since he was usually ecstatic and energetic. But the Yunho in front of him was sorrowful and scared.
"Oh, baby, come here." Seonghwa said, holding his arms out. Yunho removed the covers from his face and sat up, falling into Seonghwa's embrace. Seonghwa moved to sit on the bed and placed Yunho on his lap. "Tell mama what's on your mind." Seonghwa whispered, rubbing Yunho's back.
"Yunnie..." Yunho started, interrupting his sentence with a hiccup. "can't be small." He said. Seonghwa hummed in confusion.
"Why not, Yunnie? You're my darling little baby, of course you can be small." Seonghwa sighed. Yunho shook his head in Seonghwa's chest.
"N-no, too big." Yunho cried. "Too big to be baby n' carried 'round." He explained. Seonghwa finally understood, nodding his head and remembering how he'd told Yunho months ago that he couldn't carry him.
"Oh, baby, is that what this is about?" Seonghwa asked sadly. Yunho nodded. Everything began to click. "Sweetheart, just because you're taller doesn't mean you're too big to be little." Seonghwa told him. Yunho sniffed and looked up. Seonghwa remembered how he'd been working out recently for the comeback. He wondered if he could actually carry Yunho around.
"Not too big?" Yunho asked. Seonghwa shook his head. He hummed to himself, thinking.
"You know what, Yunnie, mama is a bit stronger than before." Seonghwa said. Yunho looked away.
"Bu... mama get hurt if he tries." He said quietly. Seonghwa shook his head. He decided he'd prove it to Yunho by lifting him up. It was surprisingly easier than he thought. Yunho gasped when Seonghwa lifted him. He'd never actually been picked up by any of them before and it was a bit surprising for him. He held onto Seonghwa's shoulders tightly, looking a bit panicked. His tears had stopped after being so shocked.
"Don't worry, baby boy, mama's got you." Seonghwa reassured. Seonghwa walked around Yunho's room with the little resting on his hip. "See, baby? Nothing to worry about, mama can carry you around everywhere." Yunho was quiet, his eyes darting around, looking at the floor.
"Mama." He muttered. Seonghwa hummed and Yunho hugged Seonghwa tightly.
"What is it, darling?" He asked, patting the boy's back. Yunho just babbled, trying to speak, but failing as he slipped further into his headspace. Seonghwa cooed. "Is my little one feeling really small?" Seonghwa asked. Yunho nodded. "Want your paci, sweetheart?" He nodded again and Seonghwa reached into Yunho's bedside table, finding the pacifier in a case. "There you go, bubba." Seonghwa said as he placed the paci between Yunho's lips. Yunho hummed and buried his head in Seonghwa's neck. "Are you hungry, baby boy? Dinner's on the table and the others are waiting for you, bubs." Seonghwa said.
Yunho hummed and nodded slowly. Seonghwa patted his back and grabbed Yunho's stuffie before opening the door and carrying the regressor out of the room. He could tell that Yunho was a bit nervous as he began to shake as they got closer to the dining room. Seonghwa hushed him and rubbed his back.
"It's okay, sweetheart, no reason to be scared." Seonghwa said quietly. Yunho sniffed and hid his head in Seonghwa's shoulder once again, holding him tightly. Seonghwa received quiet coos as they stepped into the dining room, the others already sat down for dinner, in the middle of their meal. Mingi even choked in surprise to see Yunho in Seonghwa's arms. "Yunnie's feeling super small right now, so don't be too loud." Seonghwa told them. Yunho hated shouting and loud talking when he was younger in the headspace and since he couldn't address it by himself at the moment, Seonghwa did so for him.
"Our little baby looks so cute being carried around by hyung." One of them cooed. Yunho could tell it was Hongjoong.
"Doesn't he?" Seonghwa chuckled. Yunho turned around slithly, seeing the others eyes on him. One of them gasped when they saw his tear stained cheeks and Yunho turned his head around again, his ears and cheeks heating up.
"What happened, baby boy, did something make you upset?" Yeosang asked in a concerned voice. Yunho didn't want to answer. He looked up at Seonghwa with pleading eyes.
"Our little one thought he was too big to be tiny and be carried around, but look at him." Seonghwa explained. "He looks so small in my arms, right?" Seonghwa teased. He received nods and grunts of agreement from the others. Yunho felt his heart stutter at the words. He picked his head up from Seonghwa's shoulder and looked at the older boy.
"Small?" He asked quietly, holding tightly onto his stuffie. Seonghwa nodded.
"So small and cute, isn't he?" Seonghwa asked them. Yunho looked to the others and they all nodded once again, cooing at Yunho. Jongho pouted and stood up.
"Can I hold him?" He asked Seonghwa. Seonghwa looked to Yunho and Yunho nodded eagerly. Jongho quickly scooped him up from Seonghwa's arms, making a trill noise when Yunho hugged him tightly. "Aww, you're so adorable, Yunnie." Yunho giggled a bit as Jongho bounced him up and down on his hip. "Look at how tiny he is when I pick him up." Jongho said.
"I wanna hold my baby too." Mingi pouted, standing up and rushing over to Jongho. Yunho giggled as Jongho passed him over to Mingi. Mingi looked at Yunho with a look of endearment and held him close.
"Little Yunnie will never be too big to be carried around." Mingi told him. "I'd carry you around until my arms fell off!" Mingi exaggerated. Mingi looked from Yunho to the table. "You want dinner, sweetheart?" Mingi asked. Yunho nodded and Mingi sat Yunho down at his seat between Wooyoung and Hongjoong. He clung to Hongjoong as the elder cut up his food into small bites.
During the meal, they took turns feeding Yunho and sitting him on their lap. It made Yunho feel so small and happy to have all the others cooing over him and sitting with him. He slipped so far into the headspace he'd forgotten all of his prior worries and tears.
Yunho looked to Seonghwa once dinner was over and everything was cleaned up. He made grabby hands at the other, signaling to be picked up. Seonghwa smiled and hummed.
"Of course, baby, come here." Yunho giggled as Seonghwa lifted him up. Seonghwa popped the pacifier into Yunho's mouth and carried him off to the living room, where Mingi and Wooyoung were hanging out. Wooyoung had slipped as well after seeing Yunho in headspace. The two had gotten Wooyoung's toys out and were playing with blocks.
"Yuyu!" Wooyoung exclaimed as he saw Seonghwa enter the room with the taller one in his arms. "Play wif' us!" Wooyoung said, bouncing up and down on his knees as he sat on the floor. Mingi looked up to see the two.
"Oh? Do you wanna play with blocks too, Yunnie?" Mingi asked. Seonghwa looked to Yunho and Yunho nodded. Seonghwa placed Yunho down next to Wooyoung, but Yunho whined when Seonghwa sat next to him.
"Hm? What's wrong, sugar?" Yunho whined again and pat Seonghwa's lap. "You wanna sit on mama's lap?" Seonghwa asked softly. Yunho nodded. "Well, come here then, sweetheart." He said. Yunho pouted. "Ah." Seonghwa finally understood and picked Yunho up again, placing him on his lap. Yunho hummed in content and began playing with the blocks.
After an hour or so, Wooyoung got bored and Seonghwa noticed Yunho stagnant on his lap. The little had fallen asleep sitting up. Seonghwa looked down and tried not to laugh at the cuteness of the situation. The pacifier was threatening to fall out from between Yunho's lips as his head hang down, eyes shut in utter peace and exhaustion.
Seonghwa smiled to himself and picked up the younger, holding him to his chest. Yunho began to stir in his arms, but cuddled into Seonghwa's shoulder nonetheless. Yunho's stuffed animal slipped from his hands and Yunho suddenly gasped. He whined and made grabby hands, alerting Mingi and Wooyoung.
"What's wrong, baby boy? Don't wanna go to bed?" Seonghwa asked, not noticing the stuffie that had slipped from his little ones hands. Yunho shook his head and pouted, whining again in discontent. Wooyoung gasped and pointed to the stuffie.
"Dada!" Wooyoung said to Mingi, pointing over and over again. "Yuyu's stuffie!" He said. Mingi nodded in understanding and picked up the stuffie, handing it to Yunho. Yunho sighed in content and held the stuffie close.
"Oh, is that what was wrong?" Seonghwa asked, bouncing Yunho around on his hip. Yunho nodded.
"Mm!" He hummed happily.
"Alright then, bedtime now, bubs." Seonghwa said softly. Yunho nodded again and fell forward onto Seonghwa's shoulder, resting his head on the older one. Mingi cooed and placed a kiss on Yunho's forehead.
"Goodnight, darling."He said. Mingi turned to Wooyoung." Say goodnight, sweetheart." He told him. Wooyoung nodded and smiled.
"Night night, Yuyu!" He exclaimed. Yunho waved to the other little as Seonghwa carried him out.
"Do you want your bottle before you go to bed, sweetheart?" Seonghwa asked. Yunho nodded rapidly in excitement. "Alright, I'll go get it for you." Seonghwa said, taking a detour and going back into the kitchen. In the kitchen sat Yeosang, Jongho, and San, who seemed to be playing a card game. Seonghwa greeted them as well as Yunho. He began to whine and make grabby hands at the others as Seonghwa looked around jn the cupboard for his bottle. "Huh? What is it, Yuyu?" Seonghwa asked.
"Hm!" Yunho whined and pointed at the others, squirming around in Seonghwa's arms. Seonghwa looked back at them and watched as San stood up.
"Does the little baby want daddy to hold him?" San asked. Yunho nodded and hummed, reaching out to him. Seonghwa giggled and handed Yunho over with a ruffle to his hair. Yunho immediately latched onto San, becoming giggly as San walked around with him, patting his back and petting his hair. Seonghwa warmed up some milk while the others passed Yunho around.
"What are you up to baby?" Yeosang asked as San handed Yunho over. "Getting ready for bed?" Yeosang asked. Yunho nodded. They all took their turns with Yunho, carrying him around the kitchen and entertaining him before he finally ended up in Seonghwa's arms and being told to say goodnight to everyone. Yunho did as he was told, waving to the others as they all bode him a good rest. While they did so, Yunho squirmed, reaching out for his bottle.
"Just a minute, sweet one, you can have it when we get to your room." Seonghwa said. Yunho whined and shook his head. "Can't wait?" Yunho shook his head again and pouted before throwing his arms around Seonghwa. Seonghwa just chuckled lightly and carried him off to his room, however, when he got to the doorway, Yunho held his hand out, grabbing onto the wall. "Darling, I don't know what you want." Seonghwa sighed.
Yunho huffed and pointed towards his bed and then shaking his head. Seonghwa tilted his head, confused. Yunho pointed again and shook his head, crossing his arms in an X shape.
"No bed?" Seonghwa asked. Yunho shook his head again, growing frustrated with his inability to communicate so far in headspace. He pointed at the bed again and then pointed at Seonghwa. Seonghwa was still confused, but decided to take a few guesses. "You want mama to sleep with you?" Yunho shook his head and pointed at Seonghwa again. "You wanna sleep in mama's bed?" Yunho finally nodded and hummed. Seonghwa cooed. "Oh, I see." He sighed. "Then we'll sleep in my bed for tonight, sunshine."
Seonghwa carried Yunho to his room. In all honesty, his arms were beginning to hurt and he was relived to lay the little one down. Despite the effort it took and the way it tired his arms, he wouldn't have it any other way. If it made his baby happy, he'd carry him around all day.
Seonghwa dressed Yunho up in his pyjamas before baby feeding the little his bottle. Yunho cuddled right up to the older, feeling content with himself. Slowly, he began to drift off and Seonghwa replaced the bottle with a pacifier and allowed him to sleep.
"Good night, my little one." Seonghwa said, pressing a kiss to his forehead.
