Chapter Text
“And he thinks he can try to ruin my life like that, watching over everything I do! Ugh! It’s so annoying. So what if I want to be a pirate and do pirate-y things? He’s now also on a pirate ship too! What a hypocrite.”
Hunkle resisted the urge to violently roll their eyes for the fifth time. Rachel and Hunkle were leaning against the deck’s railing, looking out into the sea. At least, Rachel was - Hunkle sat on a coil of rope, leaning back against the railing and absentmindedly making little braids in their hair.
Try to be nice , Moira’s words rang inside their head. Or at least, don’t be too mean when you show her around, yeah? Although John Hopper politely declined Hunkle’s (to be exact, Moira’s offer that was delegated to Hunkle to complete) offer of a tour because of a meeting with Simon, Rachel was enthusiastic at the prospect of “getting dirt on everyone on board,” and quickly agreed. Hunkle tried not to laugh upon hearing Rachel’s determined words - you got freaked out by Princess Andy, won’t you freak out over our secrets too?
Besides , they thought smugly, I don’t think you’ll find out all of them anyways.
In any case, a working knowledge of the ship was important, and so, whatever Rachel’s motives may be, Hunkle proceeded to give Rachel a tour around the ship.
The ship was large and it’s mechanics detailed, however, and so, even after half an hour and Hunkle’s best efforts to simplify everything, they just barely managed to cover the hull and the galley. As such, upon reaching the deck, Rachel promptly declared “a quick smoke break,” and proceeded to drag a resigned Hunkle towards the far end of the ship, lighting a cigar with her free hand while walking briskly.
Which resulted in this situation. Really , thought Hunkle, why am I always the designated babysitter again?
Rachel took a drag from the cigar and spoke. “He was all like, Rachel don’t let the others corrupt you, Rachel make sure you wash your dishes after eating, Rachel don’t pull on the ropes too much it’s bad for your back. Really. And on the first day, too. That, like, totally ruined my chances of getting to know the crew. I wanted to like, build a reputation, be cool , but nooo, he wants me to be good ol’ Rachel .” She threw her hands up in the air, accidentally throwing her cigar off the ship. “Does he really need to micromanage everything? ” She crossed her hands in a huff.The cigar landed in the water with a small hiss and sank quietly into the sea.
So dramatic. What are we, a commedia troupe?
Hunkle understood taking John Hopper into the crew - the former sheriff knew his way around weapons, not to mention was a hulking tank of a man - and Rachel too, on a theoretical level; her magic skills were undeniably useful. Listening to the young woman’s complaints, though, was seriously starting to make Hunkle reconsider the validity of having Rachel on board.
Hunkle couldn’t help but roll their eyes. Yes, magic was cool and all, but was this really worth it?
“All I want is to be myself and live my own life for a bit, is that so hard?” wailed Rachel, oblivious to Hunkle’s utter apathy.
Hunkle rolled their eyes again. “Have you ever thought that he’s just looking out for you?” cut in Hunkle, impatient. The “short smoke break” had been going on for an hour now, and Hunkle was tired. “It just sounds like good advice to me.”
Rachel covered her face with her hands. “I know,” she mumbled out, “but that still doesn’t make it any better. I -” she looked up suddenly and pointed at Moira, who was standing on the other end of the deck, “Like look, do you see that - that Captainness?” No, thought Hunkle. Rachel continued on. “That’s the face of someone who knows what they’re doing. Like, that British Navy trick? That overall sinister creepiness? I don’t know how that was so convincing, but it was. I swear, you only get that sort of attitude from experiencing a lot.”
‘Experiencing a lot’ was putting it mildly, thought Hunkle.
“And if my dad keeps hovering over me like that, how will I ever get that experience?” Rachel finished, trailing off unsurely. She looked at Hunkle. “What do you think, Hunkle?”
Finally, someone who actually calls me by my name. “Well,” they slowly started, “I don’t think you really want that experience, really. Least of all you become a raging alcoholic,” Hunkle motioned at the bottle of alcohol in Moira’s hand - “or worse. We all carry secrets on this ship, and their scars run deep. Your dad just wants to make sure you don’t get our scars, that’s all.” They stared at Rachel and raised both eyebrows. “Besides, I don’t know much about you, but it seems like you already have your fair share of scars. You have your own magical secrets you’re not telling us.”
Rachel flinched and looked away, squirming. “Well,” she chuckled lamely, “I guess you’re right. But still. I don’t know, Kid.” Well, so much for that. “It’s complicated, I guess. I think. He may be watching out for me or whatever, but that still doesn’t mean my dad doesn’t annoy me. Family, am I right?”
Hunkle bristled, hackles raising. “At least you got family,” they murmured. That barb hit particularly deep. “At least you have family to annoy you.”
Rachel blinked in confusion. “But you do have family.” Hunkle narrowed their eyes. Rachel continued in a hurry, “I mean, you do though - This ship, no? I - I overheard you guys, earlier. In the cave. Moi- The Captain said so. Like, I don’t know. Everyone on this ship is family, something like that? And like, you’re clearly important on this crew. So, you’re like family, I think? Which means you have a family? I guess?”
Hunkle stared at Rachel in shock. Huh, they thought dumbly. Maybe you’re alright after all.
“And like -” Rachel rambled on, speaking faster, “and like, Moira’s your mom right?”
Hunkle choked on air. “What?” they wheezed out, suppressing the sudden desire to laugh.
“I mean - I mean, when I was settling into my quarters Moira - the Captain - came over and introduced herself, and she said ‘hello, I’m the Captain,’ and other vaguely threatening and helpful things but I remember, I think, that somewhere in there she said ‘and Hunkle’s my Kid,’ which means that she’s your mom, right? Right?”
Hunkle burst out laughing, a deep, bellyaching laugh that couldn’t be subsided. Rachel looked on in wary confusion.
After what seemed like an eternity, Hunkle stopped laughing, wiping tears from their eyes. Chuckling, they nodded at Rachel. “Yeah,” they said with a smile, “I guess you’re right.”
“What does that even mean,” they heard Rachel mumble. “You guys and your secrets.”
Hunkle let out a snort. “You need to get better at mumbling then that, Rachel.” Rachel startled.
“Well,” she said nervously after a pause. “If you ever need a dad, I think dad’s always willing to adopt another kid. Then we can both share an annoying, overprotective parent.”
Hunkle thought of an overprotective siren with a haunting voice and an annoying selkie in flashing red.
“Thanks for the offer,” they said with a smile. “But I have all the annoying, overprotective parents I need.” They stood up, stretching their back. That's enough babysitting for today.
Really, the things they do for this ship.
“Come on, I still haven’t shown you everything, and it’s almost lunch. So. Over there is the forecastle deck. You can see the catapult, and right below it is…”