Chapter Text
It’s the second semester of her last year in high school. Sana is semi excited about college because yay new path but oh no new path to adulthood.
She checks herself in the mirror one last time. Making sure nothing of her appearance is out of place. Not that she’s one much to be so invested in her looks but who knew if there would be a new student joining (although it was rare for someone to transfer in the middle of the year). So first impressions are always at the forefront of her mind.
Because it would haunt her if she left a horrible first impression on someone.
Two Bentos are waiting for her on the counter and Sana slides them into her bag. She texts Momo that she’s headed down already. Momo replies with a single smiley face and that’s all Sana needs to know that she's already waiting for her.
Munching on a bagel and eyes deadest on her phone is Momo. Sana’s lips turn up fast as she heads to her.
“Morning!”
Momo snaps her head from her phone to her. “Finally.”
“I’m not even late.”
“That’s not what I mean. Finally, I get to see you.” Momo sends a smile and starts walking in the direction of their school.
Sana pats her chest, taking even-paced breaths. Momo never fails to make her heart palpitate as early as she could.
She catches up to her, taking a bento out from her bag and handing it over. “Mom cut your sausages into the shape of an octopus, just how you like it.”
Momo gasps, quickly opening it. She snatches one of the octopus sausages and pops it in her mouth. “I don’t know why but they just taste the best like this.”
Sana chuckles. “That’s because you’re still a child at heart.”
“And that’s such a bad thing?”
They’ve caught up with other students from their school. Mostly everyone is in pairs or triples. Occasionally there are students who walk alone, earbuds in or noses in a book.
Sana has never walked alone to school. Her and Momo always went together, since they were kids.
“No, that’s the best thing about you.”
Momo grins, eyes curving. And Sana, well, she falls a little deeper.
~~~~
Unlike the previous years of being in separate classes, Sana is glad that her last year in high school she and Momo are in the same class. Because of their last names they are apart but only by a few desks. Meaning, they sit in the same row and the four classmates between them are probably at their wits end from dealing with their childish antics of throwing small erasers, tiny bundles of paper, and Momo’s ugly faces that she makes at Sana when the teacher is focused on writing on the board.
Today is the opening ceremony for the fall semester. It’s an easy and short day. They’re all filed in lines by class sections in the gymnasium as the principal drones on about hoping the third years will enjoy their last semester peacefully and joyfully. The student president is called on stage to make a speech but the entire time, Sana is busy trying to garner Momo’s attention from where she stands down the row from her.
When that ends, they go back to their homeroom to relapse the future activities they will be partaking in. Basically they’re already deciding on what they should do for the culture festival that would be happening in a month.
“Let’s do a Maid cafe!” one of the boys suggests, earning immediate agreement from the rest of the boys.
A girl then proposes, “What about a haunted house?”
The class is split in half. Sana isn’t one for horror but it beats dressing up as a maid.
“We can just be a normal restaurant and serve normal food.”
Nobody says anything to that. Sana commends the brave soul for putting something ordinary out there but everyone knew the cultural festivals were for a time of celebration and fun. Anything beyond normalcy was a must.
Then Sana gets an idea that she hopes would appeal to everyone. “Why not a horror-themed cafe?” Everyone looks at her then. Even Momo raises a questioning eyebrow at her. She shrugs. “Just a suggestion.”
Someone mumbles, “That may be a good idea.”
And then, they’re suddenly planning on how to pull off the best, scariest, most horrifying cafe ever.
Sana is put on flyer duty, her classmates saying her bubbly and social personality will work wonders to get people to come in. She doesn’t argue because then she’d have lots of free time after finishing handing out flyers.
Momo volunteers for waitressing, saying she had previous experience and would do a splendid job. Sana laughs to herself because the experience Momo is talking about is from her job she got hired at last year at a restaurant and then fired only two weeks later as she kept messing up which orders went to which table. But that would be kept to herself.
The whole class was so invested in this that time flew by and it was lunchtime already. Sana goes to her bag, ready to scarf down her lunch. She’d worked up a hunger.
“Wanna eat here or our spot?” Momo asks, Bento in hand.
Sana thinks while looking out the window. The weather wasn’t too bad but she was too lazy to walk outside to their usual spot at the benches. “Let’s eat here today.”
Momo pushes a desk next to Sana’s, plopping onto the seat and quickly unpacking her lunch. She goes right for the rest of the sausages, humming contently with each chew. Sana does the same.
“Tomorrow it’s my turn to make lunch.”
“You mean your mom’s turn.”
“Hey! I help her. Who do you think stirs while my mom throws in seasoning after seasoning?”
“Sorry, sorry, I forgot I was talking to a five-star chef.”
They laugh and continue eating. After lunch, they’ll regroup quickly as a class and then their day ends there and they are free to leave.
Momo finishes her food fast, leaned back against the chair, patting her tummy happily. “That was the best meal ever.”
“You say that about every meal.”
“I like food.”
“And yet you still have abs.”
Momo shrugs, “Fast metabolism.” she then gasps. “We don’t have any drinks!”
Sana chokes on her rice, Momo’s sudden yelling surprising her. “Are you...trying to...kill me?!”
“I’ll get us some.”
Before Sana can tell her what she wants, Momo is gone. It’s not like she needs to anyways. Momo always brings her exactly what she likes.
While she waits, Sana takes out her phone to check her social media. The first thing that pops up on her Twitter timeline is a tweet by someone from the school in all caps: AWE STRIKING SECOND YEAR TRANSFER ASLJFHAKJFHA. The keyboard smash, in Sana’s opinion, might have been too much but then again she sometimes randomly tweets a keyboard smash when Momo does something involuntarily cute.
She scrolls through her feed, in search of a pic or other post about this second-year transfer. She doesn’t find anything so gives up and puts her phone away.
By the time Momo gets back Sana finishes her last bite of lunch. She reaches out for her strawberry milk from Momo, who she now notices is distracted. She waves a hand rapidly in front of her face. “You alright? Hello? Earth to Momo.”
And Momo only responds with what Sana can differ as a dazed sigh.
Sana resorts to shaking her by the shoulders but that does nothing. She then pinches her by the cheeks, pulling at them. Nothing still. A closer look at Momo, she notices her cheeks are blushed. Strange.
“I just saw the most beautiful, ethereal girl ever.”
Momo always says stuff like that about her favorite idols but this...this is completely earnest and genuine and Sana doesn’t like it one bit.
So she makes a joke out of it. “Aw, Momo, I didn’t know you thought of me that way.”
If this were before Momo stepped out the classroom she would have responded with either an annoyed look or a playful affirmation. But Momo only says, “Not you, Sana, I’m talking about the girl I saw at the vending machines.”
Ouch. That hurt. “Oh, right, duh. I was playing with you.”
“I’ve never seen her before. I know she’s new, I wonder what year she is. I wonder what her name is.”
Then it clicks. Momo had seen the keyboard smash inducing second-year transfer. It had to be her.
“Why didn’t you ask her?”
Momo snaps out of her trance finally. “Ask her?! If I got close to her I’m sure her blinding beauty would disintegrate me!”
Sana doesn't know what this girl looks like but she finds it difficult to believe she’s that attractive. “Knowing you, I bet you’re exaggerating her looks.”
Leaning forward, clutching the desk in a tight grip, Momo emphasizes, “She’s a literal angel, Sana! I saw a divine being with my own eyes.”
“Sure, you did. I’ll believe it when I see her.”
“Then let's go find her!” Momo grabs her by the wrist, starts dragging her out of the classroom into any direction.
Sana wants to resist because she’s not sure she can handle seeing Momo so entranced with a girl but then she was also highly curious about what this transfer looked like and if she actually displayed the divinity that Momo claims.
They go everywhere they think of but the girl is nowhere to be found. Momo seems desperate and Sana is exhausted from all the jogging they’ve done.
“Maybe tomorrow,” Sana says, huffing tiredly.
“I can’t wait until tomorrow. I need to see her again right now.”
“Lunch ends soon though.”
“I’ll risk being late.”
Sana narrows her eyes. “For a girl, you don’t even know? Seriously, Momo?”
“It’s not like I’ll get in trouble. We’re leaving right after anyway.”
The last thing Sana wants is for Momo to get in trouble for being tardy, early release or not. So she starts pulling her by the arm. “Why not wait at the school entrance instead, you’re bound to see her if you rush fast enough.”
It’s like a lightbulb goes off on top of Momo’s head. “Sana, you’re brilliant!” she squishes her into a hug. “This is why we work so well together. I’m the muscles and you’re the brain.”
Cheeks warming, Sana lets Momo continue squeezing as they walk back to the classroom. Why she even gave a suggestion is beyond her. It’s selfish but she hopes the girl leaves before Momo can even get down to the entrance.
~~~~
As soon as they’re excused, Momo zooms out of the classroom. Not even bothering to take her bag. Sana ignores the small bitter feeling that is starting to stir inside her and grabs Momo’s bag. They’ll be walking home together anyway.
She takes her time descending the stairs. Smiling occasionally at the students. She doesn’t know many of them but with the way they blush when she smiles at them, they must know her. Sana isn’t popular, per se, but she has gotten her fair confessions and love notes over the years.
All of them resulting in her rejection because she only has feelings for one person. She did, however, feel terrible about breaking their hearts and ruining their imaginations and fantasies of a possible romance with her. After all, Sana knows how it is to like someone who feels unreachable.
Sana takes off her indoor slippers and slides into her outdoor shoes. She hopes Momo changed her shoes before heading outside.
Students linger at the shoe locker, talking, and making plans. Some students are headed to club meetings. Others are changing into athletic wear for the sports clubs. Sana isn’t part of any club, never felt drawn to one. Neither was Momo.
They always preferred grabbing a bite to eat and then going over each other’s houses. Today they would be headed to Momo’s house. If all stays according to their plan.
She walks out, eyes flurrying all over the place to spot Momo. It’s had to find her when everyone is wearing the same clothing. She stands on her tiptoes, craning her neck to look above everyone.
Sana keeps walking towards the gate. It’s then she hears hushed whispering to her side. A trio of girls. They’re covering their mouths as they speak, making their words unintelligible. But they're pointing and Sana has a feeling they’re not saying nice things.
She looks in the direction of their points and feels her mood not just dampen but burn and crash.
Momo is there. Talking with the second year transfer. Who Sana gives reason to Momo’s description of being a beautiful, literal angel. This girl was born with beauty.
The girl is smiling widely. Her gums are showing. Her eyes are curving. Then for a moment she looks away from Momo and makes eye contact with Sana. Momo follows her line of vision and then immediately her expression turns brightly. She waves Sana over.
Sana could walk back into the school and claim to have forgotten something. Or, she could head on over there and meet this girl that has swooned Momo off her feet so quickly.
So she starts heading to them, her grip super tight on the strap of her’s and Momo’s bag.
“Mina, this is Sana.” Sana gives a tight wave.
Mina bows her head in greeting. “Nice to meet you, Sana-san.”
“Sana is fine.”
“Are you sure? It’d be rude of me to not use honorifics since we don’t know each other.”
“Honorifics are beyond me. I tell all my friends that...newly founded ones too.” Sana realizes she’s being way nicer to Mina than she originally expected. “Because I do hope we become friends.”
Mina blinks. She then grins. “Of course, I’d like that. Please, drop honorifics with me as well.”
Momo throws an arm around Sana’s neck, causing her to stumble. ”Aw, look at you two. Already on the way to becoming new BFF’s. Where will that leave me though?”
Sana shrugs Momo off, pretending to be disgusted with her pout. “Please, Momo, stop pouting like a child.”
“Hey, you told me this morning that my child-like heart was the best thing about me.”
Sana tosses Momo’s bag at her. She feigns knowledge of that. “When did I say that? I don’t recall saying anything like that at all.”
Mina giggles. “I can see why you two get along well. You click well together.”
“Right?! Sana is the brain and I’m the muscles because...you know…” Momo leans toward Mina and whispers as if she were sharing top-secret information. “I’ve got abs.”
Sana hears it and yanks Momo away. “Alright, back it up. You need to learn how to restrain yourself from mentioning that you have abs every five minutes.”
“Well, Momo, you’re not the only one who has abs here.” Sana and Momo raise their eyebrows at the statement. Mina chuckles nervously. “Too much?”
Momo breaks out into laughter, Sana simply smiles.
“Walk home with us, Mina.” Momo offers, eyes already shining with hope.
Mina thinks for a moment. Then nods. “As long as you two don’t mind me intruding.”
Before Sana can say anything, Momo and Mina start walking off. She hears Momo tell her, “Trust me, you’re doing us--me--a blessing by joining us. Sana makes boring small talk.”
“I do not!” she protests, steps behind them because there's no room for her to walk beside them.
“Sana and I were planning to head over to my house. If you’re not busy or anything…” Momo’s cheeks reddened. She's turned shy. Sana rarely sees Momo this shy. “Would you like to come over as well? I promise you, aside from Sana’s boring talk, we’re really fun.”
Sana mentally prays that Mina declines. And that she’ll decline every time in the future. The girl is nice but if her and Momo’s time together turned into her, Momo, and Mina’s time together, she didn’t know if she could bear through it. Mostly because Momo’s heart eyes would hurt her own heart.
“If it’s alright with Sana.”
They come to a stop. Mina and Momo turn to her. “Why would it matter what I think? It’s Momo’s house.”
Mina gives a small smile. “But it’d be rude to not consider your opinion. This is your relationship too.”
Relationship? What the heck was Mina talking about? But Momo speaks before her. “Sana and I aren’t dating. We’re just best friends, that's it.”
Mina appears...embarrassed. Or that’s what Sana would think from a single glance. But paying more attention, with the way Mina’s lips curl up at the end, and how her body loosens up, Sana can easily see that Mina is relieved.
“Right, Sana?”
Sana looks at Momo who’s making wide eyes at her. “Oh, right. Nothing but platonic love for this girl. We’re both single like pringles, ready to mingle.”
That last part may have been too much because Momo rolls her eyes but she still sends her a grateful smile. They start walking again and Sana is left to her thoughts.
The easy-going last semester she’d hope for may not be looking good at all for her.
~~~~
It’s only an hour into their time at Momo’s house when Sana almost gets a heart attack from Momo waiting for her outside the bathroom.
“What the hell?!’
Momo puts her hands in a praying position. “My bad didn’t mean to scare you.”
“Why were you standing here?”
“I have the biggest favor to ask of you.”
Sana doesn't like where this is going. “No, I will not play wingwoman for you.”
“That’s not what I was gonna ask...sort of? I think?”
“What do you need, Momo?”
“Can you pretend that you have an emergency?”
Yeah, Sana doesn't like this at all. “And why on Earth would I do that?”
They had gone straight to Momo’s room as soon as they arrived. Momo had offered to connect her switch to the TV so they could all play together but as soon as Mina spotted her switch, her eyes had sparkled and she immediately jumped into asking Momo what games she had and if she liked any other video games.
Aside from being an angel, Mina happened to be a gamer.
Sana, who wasn’ much into games, had laid on Momo’s bed in pure boredom as she scrolled mindlessly through her Twitter feed. It irked her how Mina managed to fit right into Momo’s room so easily.
“I know you’re gonna say I barely know her and we’re practically strangers besides sharing a passion for Animal Crossing but Sana, I think I’m gonna like this girl. Like, really like her.”
These were words that Sana never wanted to hear from Momo but she knew it would be inevitable. Still, they pierced her heart like daggers.
“You’re right, I am gonna say you two are basically strangers. You’re just infatuated with her looks.”
And maybe she is letting her bitterness get the best of her but she can’t help it when some girl that just transferred to their school has Momo already on her knees for her with such ease. Sana has known Momo since they were kids, she has been by her side for as long as she could remember, through thick and thin, and yet she’s never been able to make Momo smile in the way Mina has already with just one day of knowing her.
“It only takes the brain seconds to minutes to decide whether you like someone or not. Sana, with just one look, I was enthralled.”
“Haste judgments like that always lead to disaster.”
Momo crosses her arms defensively. “Or they lead you to the best outcome you’ve ever had.”
And Sana can’t argue against that because, on the day they first met, in kindergarten, Sana had speedily decided that Momo was the best candidate to sit next to out of all the other kids. And Momo had been using a white crayon on white paper when Sana first saw her. It was a haste judgment that this girl would either be the weirdest person she’d meet or the absolute best.
From that day, Sana learned to appreciate using white crayons on white paper because Momo had said that even though you couldn’t see it, your drawing was still there. Wisdom from a five-year-old that couldn’t even count to a hundred yet.
“Fine.” She agrees and Momo bursts with joy.
“Thank you so much for this.”
“Just don’t mess this up. I'm missing your Mom’s amazing tempura for this.:
“I’ll have her cook you a whole batch just for you.”
They go back up to Momo’s room, both unsurprised to find Mina heavily invested in the switch. Sana clears her throat and Mina snaps her up.
“My dad needs me to pick up a package and he said if I didn’t get it right now he’d banish me from the house.”
Mina’s eyes go wide while Momo looks at her with a ‘Wasn’t that too much?’ expression.
“I guess I should be going as well,” Mina puts the switch on the bed. She starts putting on her school jacket.
Momo sends Sana a panicked look.
“Oh, no, stay. You should definitely stay and play more switch. Maybe you can show Momo how to treat her residents in Animal Crossing with respect. She’s awfully rude to them.”
“Only the ugly ones.” Momo mumbles.
Mina hesitates still. “Are you sure it’s okay, Momo? I don’t want to overdue my stay.”
“Do it for me, Mina. Keep her company.” Both look at Sana with surprise in their eyes. “I feel bad that I have to leave early, but you two should still hang around, get to know each other more.”
“Okay, I’ll stay.”
Sana grabs her jacket and bag. “Stay for dinner too. I’ll see you two at school tomorrow.”
Then Sana leaves. With a heavy heart and teary eyes.
~~~~
It was expected that Mina would join them from now on. Still, Sana had a tiny sliver of hope that she wouldn’t, despite Momo asking her with pleading eyes if Mina can have lunch with them, hang out with them after class, and on the weekends.
Because Sana is weak to Momo’s puppy eyes, she agrees.
It’s a Saturday and Sana finds herself once again trailing behind Momo and Mina as they walk around the shopping center. They invested in a conversation about what game Momo should buy next for her Nintendo Switch.
Sana sighs bored out of her mind. She looks around, hoping any of the shops catch her eye but they just don’t. Sana isn’t in the mood to shop at all anymore.
“What should we eat?” asks Momo.
“You choose.”
“I heard the pizza place in the food court was good, is it true?”
Sana is about to tell Mina that they wouldn’t know because Momo doesn’t like pizza all that much. However, momo responds enthusiastically, “It’s the best. Let’s go there.”
That baffles Sana. She doesn’t say anything however, only following them in silence.
They order a small pizza. It’s big enough for them to have at least two slices each. Momo is hesitant with her slices, taking very small bites. Mina seems to enjoy the pizza as she hums appreciatively. The pizza is whatever for Sana. She eats it without any reaction.
“Are you having fun Sana?”
It stuns her that Mina asks that. “Oh...um...yeah.”
Mina nods. “I’m glad. Do you have any store in mind that you want to go to?”
“Didn’t you say you wanted to buy some new jeans?”
That was right but she’d forgotten all about it. “Yeah.”
Mina pipes in with, “Then let's do that. I’ve been meaning to get some shorts.”
They finish eating but Sana notes that Momo only finished half a slice. She wonders how charmed Momo was by Mina to even eat something she didn’t favor at all.
When they enter the clothing store, they’re immediately greeted by the workers and are asked if they need any help. They decline politely. Sana usually agrees because she has trouble picking out clothing but Mina had assured her she’d help.
Momo heads off into the shoe section of the store, leaving Sana and Mina alone together. Which doesn’t make sense because she’d thought that Momo would have taken this chance for her and Mina to be alone.
“I think these would suit your legs.” Mina doesn’t give Sana a chance to put her opinion and thrusts them into her hands. “Try them on.”
“But--”
“Trust me.”
Sana obliges and heads to the changing room. As soon as she slides them up, Sana looks herself in the long mirror. They look good on her. She’s tempted to buy them.
“Sana?” Mina calls out from outside. “I brought another pair.”
The jeans are hung over the door and Sana takes them. She tries them on and damn, these look well on her too.
“Sana?” she calls out again.
“Yeah?”
“Did they fit? Do you like them?”
Sana runs her hands down the material. Flattening any wrinkle. Thinking for a few seconds then answering with, “You were right. They’re perfect.”
“Can I see?”
Sana unlocks the door for Mina to enter. She doesn't know whether to strike a pose or not so she just stands there.
Mina’s jaw slacks slightly. “Whoa...they look way better than I imagined.”
It could be Sana’s imagination but she’s sure Mina’s elevator eyes mean she’s either appreciating her job well done for picking the jeans out or she’s checking Sana out.
“Did you pick your shorts yet?”
“Oh, yeah, I just need to try them on.”
Sana’s hands go to the buttons of the jeans and she almost pops them open. “Um, I need to change.”
“Oh, right! I’ll be out here.”
Sana walks out with the two pairs of jeans in hand, gesturing to Mina she can head on in. She decides to wait outside just in case Mina needs anything. It’s only fair since Mina waited for her.
For the third time, Mina calls out to her. “Sana? Can you come in here please?”
That is something she was not ready to do. “Did you get stuck or something?”
“Uh...something like that.”
Sana closes her eyes as she enters. Privacy is still most important in this situation. “What’s wrong?”
“You can open your eyes, I’m decent.”
Then the sight that greets Sana’s eyes has her holding in laughter. “You’re actually stuck.”
“My bracelet got caught and I can't get it unstuck.”
Mina’s wrist is pressed against the hem of the shorts, between her legs and Sana seriously wonders how the hell that happened. “Just how?”
“I wanted to make sure they fit in all the places but I didn’t expect my bracelet would get stuck in the ripped ends. I don’t want to risk tugging it and ruining it.”
“It wouldn't matter if you planned to buy them.”
“I don’t like how they look on me so I’m not getting them.”
Sana exhales. “How do I help though?”
“Can you see if you can pull my bracelet off?”
This is not an event she was prepared for. Sana is clumsy in all kinds of ways. Tripping on thin air, choking on her spit when she laughs too much, almost losing her life from slipping when she steps outside the shower. So it’d be a miracle if Sana managed to release the bracelet without messing it up further.
Sana crouches in front of Mina, examining the situation. If she can just slide the part of the bracelet up and out it would be okay. But Mina’s wrist is what’s making it hard. “We have to get the bracelet off you first.”
She finds where the lock is and unpins it. Now she can remove the bracelet with ease. And she does just that. The bracelet and shorts are safe.
“Here you go.”
“Thank you so much.”
“No problem.” she’s about to leave but stops at the door. “Those shorts look nice on you.”
“You think so?”
She watches Mina look herself in the mirror, twisting and turning in all kinds of ways. “I wouldn’t lie.”
Mina then smiles at her. “Maybe I’ll get them after all.”
Sana doesn’t know why she told her that. Probably because Mina complimented her so it was only right for her to repay it. Or, Sana thinks, it’s because Mina has this sort of aura that just makes you want to tell her how pretty she is, how good she looks, how nice she is.
Even though Sana wants to hate her, wants to dislike her badly, Mina makes it unfathomable because she hasn’t been anything other than nice to her.
~~~~
The chaos about Mina hasn't died down a single bit. It’s already been a month. Sana constantly hears something about Mina everywhere she goes.
‘She’s so nice!’
'Mina is such a sight for sore eyes.’
‘I swear her smile is brighter than the sun itself.’
Mina this, Mina that. She’s on the tip of everyone's tongue. Sana wonders if it’ll ever die down.
She’s already heard enough from Momo who drones on and on about how wonderful Mina is. Their phone calls and texts are now filled with Momo’s panic and endearment for Mina. And Sana just listens and responds with the bare minimum.
So it was only a matter of time that Mina became a permanent fixture in their friendship. They meet up in the morning to walk to school. Sometimes Momo and Mina meet at Sana’s, sometimes she and Momo meet at Mina’s. Today, however, Momo is missing the day due to an upset stomach so Sana is completely surprised to find Mina waiting outside her house in the morning.
“Oh.”
“Morning.”
“What are you doing here?” She doesn’t mean for it to come out brusque but it does.
“To walk to school together, of course.” Mina digs into her bag quickly and pulls out a packaged bun. “For you.”
Sana takes it slowly, curious why Mina is giving her food. “Oh...thanks?”
“I wasn’t sure what you’d like so I got you melon but we can trade--”
Sana rips open the package and takes a bite out of it. “I like it.”
Mina visibly relaxes. “That's good to hear...shall we get going?”
Besides the dressing room exchange, Sana and Mina hadn’t been alone. Momo is always with them, making things more vibrant and less awkward. Even though at times Sana felt as if she didn’t exist as Momo and Mina conversed about something together.
“How long have you and Momo known each other?” Mina asks.
Sana had been entranced with walking and the weather that seems to be getting colder. “Since kindergarten.”
“So basically your whole lives.”
Yeah, Sana thinks, and she’s thankful for it.
“I like to think that Momo and I are soulmates,” She says and half of her regrets it because this is the girl that Momo is trying to win over but the other half of her is proud of saying it because this is also the girl that stands between Momo and her love.
“I’ve always wanted someone like that.”
“Like…?”
“Someone who knows me more than I know myself. A bond stronger than anything in the world.”
Sana doesn’t know what to say so she doesn't say anything. They walk the rest of the way to school in silence.
Mina’s revelation consumes Sana’s thoughts throughout her morning classes. She starts thinking about how Momo very likely knows her better than she does herself, about their bond is as tough as s diamond and can't be cut easily.
When it’s lunch and one of Sana’s classmates pokes her on the shoulder then points at the door, where Mina is waiting patiently. They have lunch in Sana’s classroom. The hushed murmurs are hard to ignore but Sana already knows they’re all about Mina.
Some look in awe as if they’ve been blessed by the gods, some have questionable looks as if they’re trying to figure out when Sana and Mina had become close like this. It didn’t matter what they were whispering or thought about, Mina was the center of it all.
And so Sana continues thinking about Mina’s words. She concludes that Momo doesn’t know her more than herself because if she did then she’d know Sana has been in love with her. Their bond is probably not as strong as she hoped for because Momo is stretching it out and trying to include Mina in it every chance she gets.
~~~~
The cultural festival is in a few days. They've spent hours staying after school working on decorations, costumes, the menu, and flyers to hand out.
Sana usually loves this part. Having silly fun with classmates and doing the arts and crafts. But Sana is wearing a monotonous expression as Momo keeps blabbering about how she's going to work up the guts to ask Mina if she'd like to spend time together at the festival after Momo finishes her waitressing shift.
"I really hope our free time lines up. It'd suck if it didn't."
"Yeah," Sana sighs, a dent between her eyebrows as she concentrates on trying not to mess up painting the poster to advertise their horror cafe. "I bet."
"I wonder what her class is doing."
"Ask her."
Momo looks as if Sana asked her to jump into a pool of electric eels. "I can't do that!"
"It’s a simple question of hey, what's your class doing. That's all there's to it."
"You don't get it Sana. I literally turn into a blushing mess around her."
"You're fine when we're with her together."
"That's because you're there. It’s like this--Mina makes my heart boom crazily but you soothe the chaotic pounding."
Sana isn't sure if she likes the sound of that. “So I bore you?”
Momo is affronted. “I just said you’re soothing. Like honey chamomile tea. When I’m nervous,” she gently pulls the brush out of Sana’s hand, replacing it with her hand. “You make me calm. You’re the best at making sure I keep my shit together.”
Honestly, if they weren’t in the classroom surrounded by their classmates, Sana might’ve blushed and pounced Momo. Instead, she squeezes Momo’s hand and offers an appreciative smile. This moment feels sort of infinite but it’s interrupted by a classmate of theirs calling--more appropriately, screeching--Momo’s name.
The moment of Sana perhaps thinking of the possibility that she and Momo could be more, could be something, comes to an end because scattering off to the door in excitement is Momo as Mina gives her a gummy smile that could warm and break the hearts of the whole student body.
It seems to Sana that Mina has done a swell job in fitting in perfectly into their life. Because now her moments with Momo never seem to last long as they are cut short to accommodate the new moments Momo is surely making with Mina.
Sana goes back to painting, wondering if the way her fist clenches around the paintbrush would break the paintbrush.
~~~~
Sana feigns feeling unwell and heads to the nurse during lunch. She insists that Momo and Mina have their lunch, just after handing Momo the bento her mom made, and she doesn't need their accompaniment. Momo appears grateful, most likely assuming Sana is doing this for her benefit. On the other hand, Mina seems worried and that just makes Sana want to get away all the more.
She lies to the nurse about feeling lightheaded and is offered to either take a nap before resuming class or to head home early if she feels awfully unwell. Sana jumps at the chance to go home.
She retrieves her bag, thankful that Momo and Mina are not present in the classroom. They’re probably sitting in her and Momo’s spot if they hadn’t found a spot of their own. Sana didn't want to think too much into it.
On the way home, she stops by the store for some snacks since she missed lunch and the bento her mom packed didn’t seem all that appetizing anymore.
It’s on her fifth movie that her parents message her that they’re going out with some friends of theirs. It lightens her mood a bit because her parents are still very much in love and act like they’re the child asking her, the presumable parent, if it's alright they go on a date and stay out late. She replies that they better not drink too much but to still have tons of fun.
Her parent’s love is one of the very few things that keep the tiny light of hope alive in Sana.
Just when she decides to wash up, her doorbell rings. Sana is hesitant because she’s not in the mood for visitors but the curiosity gets to the best of her. When she opens the door, Momo immediately walks right in, excusing for her intrusion, and chucking her shoes off before heading into the kitchen.
It all happens too fast, and although it happens very often, Sana is still stunned. “What are you doing here?”
“You left school early because you weren’t feeling well. I told my mom to make you some soup.”
Sana joins her in the kitchen, her stomach grumbling when Momo begins to unpack the container she hadn’t noticed. “Smells delicious.”
“You haven’t eaten right?”
“No, didn’t have much of an appetite. Until now.”
Momo goes about her kitchen, pulling out the utensils, bowls for the soup and for the rice she also brought along. Sana is informed--demanded to sit at the table to be served. Seeing Momo so in place, so in motion in her kitchen brings inexplicable feelings.
“Where are your parents?” Momo asks as she sets everything down in front of Sana.
“On a date.”
“Forever the romantics. The only dates my parents go on are to all-you-can-eat buffets on their cheat days.”
“I think if you’re with the person you love most, then it doesn’t really matter what you do, don’t you think?”
Momo raises a brow at her. “I guess your parent’s romanticism is genetic.”
Sana puts a spoonful into her mouth, not wanting to comment. Thankfully, Momo lets her eat in peaceful silence. When she finishes, she drags Momo to the living room before she could start washing the dishes, saying she’ll do them later.
“I was also supposed to bring your homework but I forgot it at home,” She says. “But I did bring the bento. Which, you can tell your Mom she doesn’t need to worry about making lunch for me.”
“Oh, why?”
“I’m basically an adult now, I can’t live on packed lunch from my best friend’s mom forever.”
“Is this your way of telling me that you don’t like my mom’s cooking anymore?” Sana jokes and Momo is quick to defend herself.
“No! That’s not why! Her cooking is amazing. I just...I feel bad that she has to make not just for your dad and you but me as well.”
Sana still isn’t sold on it. “It’s never bothered you in all the past years. Why now?”
“Like I said, I’m an adult now. When I'm In college, those lunches won’t be there anymore. I need to get used to fetching food for myself.”
Sana chuckles. “Fetching food? What are you, a stray animal?”
Momo whines, letting herself fall into Sana’s knees. “Leave me alone.”
“Alright, alright, Miss I’m-a-grown-up-now -nd-need-to-fend-for-myself. I’ll tell her and use a better excuse than yours.”
“What are we watching?” Momo grabs the remote and turns Netflix on, surfing through the titles.
Instinctively, Sana’s hand starts combing through Momo’s hair. Playing with the ends. “Whatever you want.”
As long as Momo is like this with her, Sana couldn’t care less.
It’s halfway during some random movie Momo picked that she turns on her back, big, adoring eyes staring at her, that cause Sana to flinch slightly because she’d been sure with how Momo’s breathing had quieted that she was asleep.
“What’s up?” Sana asks softly.
“Are you afraid of what our future holds?”
Now, Momo is not the type to usually delve into deep topics like this but when she does...Sana knows something is troubling her.
“I mean, who isn’t afraid of the future. Why, is something wrong?”
“I sometimes get nightmares that in my future I’m alone. That everyone important to me isn’t present.”
Sana smoothes her bangs. “It’s not real. I guarantee I’ll be there no matter what.”
Since day one, it was an unconscious promise she made when she was just five years old. Now, she’s voicing it out as reassurance in hopes it comforts her best friend.
“You’re my favorite person, Sana. Don’t ever leave me.”
It shouldn’t hurt because Momo’s words carry love and tenderness but they still carve into Sana’s heart painfully. All for the reason that even if Momo may not ever be able to promise Sana to be hers solely, Sana would always, in a heartbeat, promise to be Momo’s.
“You’re my favorite, too. I wouldn’t ever dream of leaving you.”
Momo ends up leaving a few minutes after that because it is still a school night. Although, at the door, they embrace each other tightly. Momo probably for the reason of keeping Sana chained to her. Sana definitely for the reason of wanting to keep Momo with her for as long as she can before she leaves.
Because, over time, Sana has realized that it wouldn’t ever be her leaving Momo rather it would be Momo leaving because she is the one, after all, who has been slowly slipping away from Sana and to Mina.
~~~~
It’s the day of the cultural festival.
Sana has been non-stop handing out flyers. Being cute and bubbly is like her calling. She attracts nearly everyone’s attention with the way she adorably shouting out for everyone to attend her class’s horror cafe. It’s like they are magnetically attracted to her and grab a flyer before she gives them her most cutest anime smile.
Like she imagined, she finished handing out her flyers in a quick time, even after taking a few from her other classmates who were struggling to hand them out. Now she has free time to enjoy the festival.
She takes a stroll around the booths outside, seeing if any of them have food that calls her attention but if she’s honest, her mind is only on Momo and wanting to spend this day with her. They’ve always spent the cultural festivals together, going through the booths and classrooms.
However, Momo is busy at the moment doing her waitress shift in their horror cafe. So Sana figures she might as well drop by and see how it all turned out.
The hallways are cluttered. Students from their school are roaming about if they’re not actively participating in their class’s event. There are non-familiar faces among the crowd too. But her GPS is set on her class.
When she gets there, her mind is blown at the line waiting to get in. She knows that a horror cafe is far from original but all these people are lined up, animatedly talking with each other as if this was one of the most popular places in all of Japan.
Since she’s not really there to be seated, she’s let in. Sana just wants to see what Momo chose to dress up as since she was adamant in not revealing anything about her costume to her.
Black paper had been taped against the windows to block out the sunlight. The desks are draped with purple velvet cloths and were set up as tables in a cafe with electronic candles lights in the center of them. There are webs hung around, plastic bats and spiders, crystal-like lights dangled along the walls to provide more light. One of their classmates even managed to obtain a fog machine.
One corner of the classroom is blocked, presumably where the makeshift kitchen/change room is. She brushes past the curtains and marvels at how well her classmates are working together. There are three of them making drinks, three of them making sure their pastries stay stocked, four waiters/waitresses collecting orders, and two of them acting as makeup artists to touch up the other’s costumes.
“Sana!”
She whips her head to the curtain entrance. Her eyes widen at Momo’s costume. “You’re...Sadako?”
Her long black hair is tousled forward as best as it could be, probably all held by gel or hairspray, the white dirtied, stain dress accentuating her body well, and her face is painted white and gaunt. It’s not perfect but Momo is pulling it off really well.
“I look good, don’t I?” Her cocky tone doesn’t slip past Sana’s ears.
“I thought you were aiming for something scarier.”
Momo deflates. “Sadako is scary. You’re just acting like I don’t frighten you.”
When Momo fixes all of her hair to the front of her face and stands like Sadako would, Sana can’t help but giggle. “You look way more adorable than frightening.”
“At least pretend for my own sake.” Before Sana could respond, Momo is ordered to take orders out to the tables. “Duty calls. I still have a few hours left but I’ll be free for the night.”
She doesn't even dare bring up Mina. “Text me when you’re done.”
Momo salutes her before heading back out.
She manages to swipe a muffin before leaving as well. Maybe she wouldn’t need to worry about spending the cultural festival alone.
~~~~
And a few hours later, Sana receives an apology from Momo through text.
She ran into Mina and worked up the courage to ask her to hang out alone. Meaning, Sana would be alone after all while Momo and Mina spend it together.
Sana sighs, wanting to yell out in anger. It isn’t fair. She hates how easily Mina can swoop Momo away without lifting a finger. All the while Sana is struggling to keep Momo beside her.
It’s just not fair.
Sana is tempted to find some of her classmates and be with them. It wouldn't be the same however. Being with anyone else just isn't the same.
“I’m so hyped for the fireworks!” She hears from her right.
“Same! It’s the first time we have them. Our budget usually can’t cover it but this year we must've had some spare funds for them.”
That was definitely new and definitely something she had no knowledge of.
Sana has a love-hate relationship with fireworks. She likes the shapes and colors of them and is amazed at how they work. It’s the loud crackling and booming noise they make that absolutely terrifies her.
And Momo feels the same way.
So it’s only natural for her to go searching for Momo to warn her because she's not answering her calls or responding to her texts, not like she’d have her attention on her phone anyway. She doesn't have Mina’s number either.
She asks students left and right if they'd spotted Momo but none of them know where she went. Sana finds out when the fireworks are being done and when she checks the time there happens to be only fifteenish minutes until they'd go off.
Sana jogs frantically, whipping her head all around to spot any sight of Momo or Mina.
In the past, when Sana and Momo attended festivals with fireworks they were always together to cover each other’s ears. Back then it was a sort of 'ill protect you if you protect me’ sort of thing. They each could have covered their own ears but something about being protected by Momo and protecting her made Sana feel magical and important.
She should be worrying about her own sake but she never does when she knows there's a risk of Momo in any kind of danger. Little or big.
Sana counts off all the places she's checked. Nearly all the classrooms of every floor, the gym, the courtyard, all the outside booths, even the restrooms.
The only place left is the rooftop. But the door is always locked. Still, Sana takes off to the staircase and hopes her legs don't give out from exhaustion as she runs up to the rooftop entrance.
There are only a few minutes left. So when she gets to the door, she pants tiredly, trying to regain normal oxygen levels.
Sana turns the knob of the door and to her surprise, it turns and the door opens. She cautiously peeks her head out and there they are.
It’s only their backs but she doesn't need super vision to know what Momo looks like from the back.
"My adrenaline is pumping from being up here." Sana hears Mina say although she's very soft-spoken but up on the rooftop it’s quiet and calm, all the ruckus from the festival seems as if it's miles away.
"I'm not good with heights."
"Then why are we up here? I didn't mind joining the loud fun."
Sana strains her vision. It's gotten darker by the minute. Thankfully the moon is bright enough to outline their figures at least. She sees Momo scratch the back of her head. A nervous habit.
"I mean, this isn't too high up so I'm okay but I wanted to come up here because...I wanted to be alone with you."
No. Sana wants to jump out and stop everything.
"Oh?"
"Mina--"
"Do you--"
They both stop then laugh. Sana cringes. It’s like a scene right out of a drama.
"You go first."
"Mina...I really--"
Then fireworks blast into the air and Sana flinches, instantly covering her ears while trying to keep watch on the scene before her.
Momo does the same, covering her ears as she yelps with fright.
Sana almost runs out to Momo but what stops her is Mina that places her hands over Momo’s. It’s like she's offering double the muffle and Sana’s not sure that's how it works but as she watches Momo’s posture straighten up, she's scared of how safe, how secure Momo looks.
It was always Sana taking care of Momo. Always her being there when she was scared as she watched scary movies, always her that offered to stay up all night when Momo had her insomniac moments, always her that covered Momo's ears to protect her from the scary loud sounds of fireworks.
But now...Sana isn't the one making sure Momo feels safe. It’s Mina.
The fireworks go on for about five minutes. When they're over, her arms fall to her sides listlessly as she carries on watching whatever it was happening between Momo and Mina unfold.
"Not a big fan?" Mina asks, pulling her hands away.
It’s then a crack makes its first form on Sana’s heart when Momo catches Mina’s hands.
"I really like you. I think you're awesome and nice and so wonderful and completely unmatched to anyone I've ever met."
That hurts somehow.
Sana hears Mina inhale deeply.
"Momo, I--"
"You don't feel the same and that's okay. Really. I just wanted to tell you."
There's a very tiny sliver of hope that Mina does not bear any mutual sentiments.
But Mina shakes her head. "I like you, too. You're pretty marvelous yourself."
Sana should leave. She should walk away before her heart cracks further.
"Seriously?!"
Mina nods. "I know it hasn't been long since we've known each other but you...you made me feel so comfortable and free to be who I really am."
"Is there another Mina you show others?"
Mina looks down. "Nobody ever tries to get to know the real me and when I accidentally show them...they leave. All they see is the outside, my looks are what all that matters to them..."
"Thank you for showing me the real Mina."
Sana is intruding but her feet won't budge. Hearing every bit of this is wrecking her, pulling at the seams of her heart she's trying to keep together.
"Can I...kiss you?" Momo asks softly.
Sana sees Mina nod slightly. When Momo starts leaning in, Sana finally moves away. She starts running down the stairs, out of the school building, past the students, past the entrance gate. Aimlessly running in any direction.
Right now, Sana just needs to get far away.