Archive of Our Own

“Can you just fucking mind your own business, Hwang?!” yelled by an enraged voice which belongs to a squirrel looking boy with a deep scowl on his face. “Me?! Get your shit together, Han. You were the one who fucking burned the list! For what?!” yelled back by a tall boy with long blonde hair with equal rage as the former.

“How many times should I repeat it to you?! I didn’t know it was the cast list!” the taller scoffed as he rolled his eyes at the smaller boy in front of him. “Fucking bullshit Han Jisung! You wouldn’t still admit shit even when you were clearly caught? How low can you get?” the smaller of the two was clearly pissed at what the taller had said as he pushed the other boy harshly against the wall while tightly gripping the front of his shirt.

But the taller didn’t seem that much affected by what the smaller did and instead, he smirked mockingly at the smaller.

“What? Did I hit a nerve?” the smaller boy– Jisung tightened his grip on the taller. “You don’t know shit, Hwang Hyunjin” Jisung spit rather harshly, every word contains so much hatred. “Oh are you sure?” the taller– Hyunjin said in a sing-song voice making Jisung push him harder against the wall. But Hyunjin leaned against Jisung’s left ear.

“You burned the list because Minho got paired with a girl from his class and not you”

That seems to be the last straw for Jisung as he was about to land a punch on Hyunjin’s face when various voices started screaming in their direction and pairs of hands instantly separated Jisung and Hyunjin before anything else could happen.

“We fucking left you for five minutes and this is what we came back to?! When will you two stop killing each other huh?!” two people were holding Jisung, preventing him from attacking Hyunjin while two people came to Hyunjin’s side, eyeing him if he decides to fight back.

“You better have a reason for this” a gruff voice said, disappointment evident on his voice. “This fucker couldn’t just stop meddling with my life” Jisung spat as he shrug off the hands of the three people holding him. “Really now? Or do you want me to–“ Hyunjin didn’t have the chance to finish what he was about to say when Jisung launched at him again, holding tight on the front of his shirt with both hands.

“You motherfucker!”

“Jisung stop!”

“Hyunjin fucking don’t!”

Someone shoved Jisung away from Hyunjin then later on gripping on both boys’ shirts using both his hands with so much strength.

“I wasn’t fucking asking, you fuckers. I was demanding answers!” the two boys froze when they heard the other boy curse, both eyes were widening both in shock and fear. “Changbin that’s enough” interrupted by another boy who was originally beside the seething boy who had both Hyunjin and Jisung in his grasp.

“But hyung these two are being too much!” the boy– Changbin reasoned out. He was clearly pissed at the other boys’ behavior as he thinks enough is enough. “I know. But please Changbin, let them go. You’re scaring the others” Changbin loosened his grip on the two and just scowled at them going back to his original spot, beside the other boy.

“I won’t ask what happened but so you know, I’m very much disappointed in the two of you. You’re always fighting with each other and there’s never a day where you don’t get physical and leave scars on both your face. Aren’t you getting tired of this? Because we are. And if you don’t want to fix whatever mess this is, at least be civil” the two had their heads hanging low. It wasn’t like it’s the first time they got scolded like this, but Chan’s voice seems so tired and maybe they feel a bit guilty for that.

“Just this once please stop fighting. We have a big project and our grades are at stake in this and all of us will surely fail if you continue this”

Both didn’t say anything but had different thoughts inside their heads.

‘I hate him’

‘I hate pretending’

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“Ji what was that about again?” It was only Jisung and his bestfriend, Felix. The two of them were heading back to their shared apartment after a stressful day. Morning was when Jisung and Hyunjin almost killed each other again and on the afternoon, the whole drama club was in chaos when none of them could find the cast list for their upcoming play.

Hyunjin and Jisung did as what Chan told them. There were no fights after their big fight in the morning much to everyone’s relief. They distanced themselves from one another and their friends were always keeping an eye on them just in case another fight arise, but gladly there was none.

Once they found a spare copy of the cast list, they proceeded to the briefing which was done smoothly considering no fights were ensured.

“You know the usual” Jisung wanted to avoid talking about what happened earlier. Hyunjin was right, he did burn the list. And Hyunjin was also right when he said, he did it because Minho was paired with a girl from two year level above them. He hates to admit it but Hyunjin was right.

Felix frowned. He could see past through Jisung. Heck, they’ve known each other for only nine years but he could read Jisung like an open book so he doesn’t believe him.

Felix may have known Jisung for nine years but it isn’t that long compared to the time Hyunjin and Jisung had known each other who basically grew up together. Felix heard from Jisung’s mom back then that Hyunjin and Jisung were the best of friends during their childhood but then one day, the two boys started distancing themselves from each other.

Their friends didn’t even know of this so Felix just keeps quiet. Most of them knew Hyunjin and Jisung just didn’t get along and would constantly fight so if they knew their history, their worlds would flip for sure.

“You know I don’t believe that. Ji, you sure you want to lie to me? Your best friend?” Jisung looked at Felix, Felix stared back. If there’s someone who can match Jisung’s hard-headedness aside form Hyunjin? That would be Felix.

Jisung sighed as they reached their apartment, silently unlocking the door. When they were completely inside, Jisung turned to Felix. “Promise not to tell anyone” Felix scoffed. “You know I can keep a promise. I kept yours and Hyunjin’s secret for years, remember?” Jisung scowled at the mention of Hyunjin. “Don’t remind me of him” Felix only shrugged. It’s still a mystery to Felix and Hyunjin and Jisung’s parents what caused these boys to hate on each other so much to the extent they would get physical with each other.

“He caught me burning the cast list” Felix wasn’t expecting that. His eyes widened as he stared at Jisung dumbfounded, with his mouth hanging wide. “You fucking what?!” Felix yelled, still in shock. He couldn’t believe what his best friend had done. “Are you fucking out of your mind?!” Felix seethed. Finding a copy of the cast list took them hours and the whole drama club were at their wit’s end. And knowing the reason why they were stressed on the first day was his own best friend’s fault. Felix couldn’t believe his ears,

“I know it was stupid–“ Felix scoffed. “–hear me out. I only did it because I was jealous” If Felix was confused earlier he was even more confused now. “What?” JIsung sighed once more. “I don’t like it when Minho hyung was paired with that senior” Felix stared at Jisung dumbly. He wanted to scream at Jisung to tell him that they suffered the whole afternoon looking for the copy of the cast list but it was actually burned and it was all because his best friend was jealous.

Felix inhaled deeply. No. He doesn’t want to lash out at Jisung right now.

“Just because you were jealous, you burned the list?” Jisung nodded slowly. Felix massaged his temples, the stress from earlier seems to be coming back once more. “Ji, you know Minho hyung only had his eyes on you. And it’s just a play, there’s no feelings attached to it” It wasn’t a secret that Minho and Jisung had something going on. They aren’t official yet but they all knew it would eventually lead to that soon.

“I know. But you know how I don’t have control with my emotions”

‘Yes I’m aware. And you’re only like that with Hyunjin’

“But Ji that was wrong. We got into so much stress earlier finding that list. Ji you shouldn’t have done that” Felix frowned. Even if Jisung was his best friend he wouldn’t encourage what he did. “I know that Lix but it’s already done and they found a copy so no harm done” If Felix wasn’t that nice he would’ve punched Jisung to knock some sense into him.

“You and Hyunjin almost killed each other again” Felix exasperatedly said. “It was his fault for always meddling with my life” Felix’s lips formed a thin line.

‘Was that the reason why you hate him so much? Because he cares about you?’ was the thought circling around Felix’s head.

“I hate him” Jisung turned around from Felix and headed to their kitchen.

“Do you really?” Felix whispered but Jisung was already in the kitchen. Felix could only sigh. Maybe it was indeed hopeless.

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“This is ridiculous” Jisung scoffed as he flopped on the empty chair beside Seungmin. They had their break for the mean time. They’d been filming for hours and it was the same scene over and over again much to Jisung’s annoyance. “This was the script given so just deal with it” Seungmin was Hyunjin’s best friend but Jisung was pretty close to him even if he was mostly on Hyunjin’s side, they were still in the same circle of friends so Jisung couldn’t really avoid anything which relates to Hyunjin.

“But it’s the same scene for the past three hours! I’m getting tired of watching this” Jisung scoffed angrily. It’s the scene where Minho was looking fondly at the girl over and over again because the senior would forget their line every time Felix hits the slate.

“Then close your eyes” Seungmin rolled his eyes as he stood and went to Changbin. He doesn’t really want to deal with Jisung’s bullshit right now.

When Seungmin left, Jisung turned his gaze back at Minho. He was openly admiring him and when Minho must’ve felt eyes on him, he turned to Jisung’s direction and smiled at the younger. Jisung swore his heart did a flip back there.

Jisung then turned away from Minho, he hates to admit it but he suddenly got embarrassed. What’s there to get embarrassed anyway? They’re sort of dating anyway, was what Jisung thought.

When Jisung’s eyes landed on another figure just meters away from Minho, his mood suddenly dropped. It was Hyunjin. Their eyes meet for a brief second but both rolled their eyes at each other. Jisung didn’t know why but his eyes landed once more on Hyunjin’s figure.

‘Since when did he started looking like that?’ Jisung had his eyes trained on Hyunjin’s long blonde hair which was tied in a ponytail. ‘He looks different, more–’

Jisung caught himself before he could think of other inappropriate thoughts regarding the person he hates the most.

‘Where the fuck did those thoughts came from, Han Jisung?’ he scowled at himself.

“Okay break is over. Everyone get on your positions”

And with that, Jisung found himself in another torturous filming which lasted for another five hours.

“Hyungs let’s play basketball” the youngest– Jeongin suggested once classes ended. “Aren’t you tired Innie?” Chan asked. Jeongin only shook his head and grinned happily at his hyungs. “Nope hyung. Please let’s go?? Just this once, pretty please????” the older boys couldn’t really resist the youngest’s charms so they agreed.

“Let’s go. I need to pump up my adrenaline anyway” Changbin said as he dragged Jeongin with him. The two leads the way to the gym followed by the rest except for two people.

“You sure you’re okay with this, Ji?” Jisung turned to the person beside him and smiled. “Of course hyung. You’re beside me anyway and I’m not really that scared, it’s just basketball” Minho chuckled and held Jisung’s hand in his, making the younger’s heart flutter. “But didn’t you say round things scare you?” Minho teased the younger. Jisung only rolled his eyes. “My head is round but am I scared of myself?” the two let out giggles as they followed their friends. Unknown to them, someone was watching from behind them.

‘You always lose, Hwang Hyunjin’

The group of friends were enjoying their time, playing around with each other. Each time one of them scores, hugs are returned. It was fun.

When Minho scored, Jisung ran up to him, embracing him while ruffling his hair. Minho immediately caught Jisung by the waist and steadied the over excited boy. Both had wide smiles on their face as the others also cheered alongside them.

“That was so cool, Minho hyung!” Jisung grinned happily still in the arms of Minho. “Of course. That shot was for you” Jisung dumbly giggled as he kept ruffling Minho’s hair affectionately. “Come on love birds just one more game and we’re done for the day” Felix said but he too was grinning. Minho and Jisung indeed look perfect for each other.

“Hyunjin hyung, this one shot is for you” Jeongin announced confidently. “Let’s see it, Innie” Hyunjin said with a hint of affection on his voice. When Jeongin scored, Hyunjin ran up to him and hugged him. “You scored!” Jeongin caught the older as they both laughed.

Just like Seungmin, Jeongin was Hyunjin’s other best friend. Jeongin might be the youngest and the last to join their friend group but he was observant. And let’s just say, he might know something.

On their way to their lockers, Jisung and Hyunjin bumped against each other. “Why does it always have to be you?” Jisung rolled his eyes. His locker was unfortunately beside Hyunjin’s as their surname starts with the same letter making it inconvenient for the smaller. “I don’t want to pick a fight with you today, Han” Hyunjin ignored Jisung and continued to get his things from his locker.

“Oh is our little Hyunjinnie gonna cry. Can’t take a small teasing among friends” Jisung teased, he knows Hyunjin would eventually give in but he didn’t and instead–

“Listen here, Han Jisung. I don’t know why you hate me so much and if you really don’t have any intention of fixing us then we might as well ignore each other for the rest of our lives. That way it would be easy for everyone. From now on, I don’t know you” Hyunjin pinned Jisung against the lockers to which Jisung inhaled a sharp breath when he felt Hyunjin’s hot breath against his ear making him shiver.

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“Ah I’m so tired. I can’t feel my legs anymore” Felix complained as he flopped himself on his and Jisung’s couch on the living room. “We’ll get a good night sleep for sure”

They had dinner and after they both took separate baths, they met again on the living room with a random movie playing on their TV. “Are you okay Ji?” JIsung was snapped back to reality when he heard Felix’s deep voice. “Oh. Yeah I’m good just tired” it wasn’t a complete lie, he was indeed tired but what Hyunjin said kept replaying on his mind.

‘From now on, I don’t know you’

Why does he feel funny all of a sudden? Whatever Hyunjin would say back then doesn’t affect him that much but why does those seven words feel different? “We should sleep. It was a long day, it should be enough for today” that snapped Jisung back again. He nodded and went to his room.

He stared at the white ceiling while recalling what happened earlier.

Why did he hate Hyunjin again?

Ah. That’s right. He made him feel things he shouldn’t be feeling. He hates Hyunjin’s smile, he hates Hyunjin’s laugh, he hates it every time Hyunjin’s eyes turns to crescents, he hates how nice he is, he hates that he makes his heart fuzzy, he hates Hyunjin because he started liking and he doesn’t want to admit it. He hates it because Hyunjin hates him now.

And just like that, Jisung lost consciousness. All he could see was black but Hyunjin’s words kept repeating.

‘From now on, I don’t know you’

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Hyunjin.

Hyunjin!

I shot awake, gasping for air as if I just drowned and was revived once more. My lungs feels like burning as it feels like my whole world was spinning. Did I drown?

I clutched my heart, trying to steady my breathing. It worked, I’m slowly calming down. I took a deep breath and scanned my surroundings. I froze when I couldn’t recognize the room I was in.

‘This isn’t my room?!’ I panicked and was about to stand up and bolt right there and then when a voice suddenly talked which made me froze right on the spot.

“Hyung are you okay?” a sleepy voice which I could recognize spoke. I slowly looked at the direction of the voice and that’s when I saw him. No. I saw… me.

“AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU!!” the person– me– the person I look alike looked at me weirdly. Shit. He looks a lot like me!!? Fuck.

“Hyung are you sure you’re seriously okay now? Does your head still hurt? Maybe we should call mom and schedule another appointment with the doctor” My look alike said. What the fuck? “Who the fuck are you? Why do you look like me?” I asked rudely. He only rolled his eyes at me. The nerve–!

“You really bumped your head hard–“ he properly turned to me. Shit. I’m staring at myself but with blonde hair. “I’m your twin brother, silly. It’s me, Jisung. Han Jisung”

“WHAT!??!”

“Hyung please stop screaming. Between the two of us, that’s my job” What the fuck is this nonsense??!! “Hyung? Jiwon hyung, hello are you there?”

“Is this some kind of prank?! Did Hyunjin pay you to pretend as me?” I’m pissed. If Hyunjin really had the nerve to prank me like this I will–

“Oh right! Speaking of Hyunjin hyung, he asked me to tutor him later after class! You’re free to come, hyung” What. The. Fuck?

I feel like collapsing right now. This is fucking messed up.

“Come on. Hyung we’ll be late for classes” I don’t know anymore.

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We reached “our” school and it wasn’t my school. Where the fuck am I really? Fuck. Did I teleport or something?! My eyes widened. I don’t recognize this school, I don’t recognize our way, I don’t know what is this!

I just followed “my twin” towards whatever classroom we are in. I was looking at him from behind. He really resembles me a lot but with blonde hair. If what he’s saying is true, then I must be in another universe. No. Wait, it’s a parallel universe. I know I’m not crazy, I’m not from this universe. I have the memories from that other world, I know I’m Han Jisung not Han Jiwon. Maybe in this universe my name is Jiwon but I know I’m Han Jisung.

I stared at Jisung– wow saying my own name feels weird. If I’m indeed in a parallel universe to ours then this Jisung would be me. But why am I here? How did I end up here?

“Hyung?”

“Jiwon hyung we’re here” I was snapped back to reality when I felt a hand on my wrist, halting me from walking. “Oh. I didn’t notice. Sorry” he only smiled at me and led me inside. I need to get back. But how?

“Guess who’s back in the building?!” my twin from this universe yelled excitedly when we entered the room. The people inside stopped with whatever they were doing and stared at us while the others instantly made a crowd around us. Shit. This can’t be good, I don’t want attention.

“Guys you’re crowding them. Move back people” I recognize that voice, it’s Felix’s. I searched for him and spotted a red haired boy which looks a lot like the Felix in my universe. The other students make way for us much to my relief. “Thanks Lix” Jisung thanked Lix. “Anytime mate” Are they also perhaps best friends?

The Jisung in this universe dragged me to our seats, I guess. I was fortunately sitting beside Felix but I noticed an empty sit beside Jisung. “Who sits beside Jisung?” Felix turned to me and had this smile on his face, as if he understands me or something.

“That’s Hyunjin hyung’s seat” my breath got caught in my throat. Hyunjin. No Jisung. It’s not the same Hyunjin from home. It’s this universe’s Hyunjin.

And speaking of the devil and he shall appear, Hyunjin made his way in our direction. I froze when I looked at him. This Hyunjin has short black hair completely different from the Hyunjin I knew who has long blonde hair.

“Oh Jiwon? Glad you’re finally back” shit. That smile. It’s similar to the Hyunjin back home. Should I respond or?? I don’t know what’s my relationship with him in this universe. “Um yeah” I strained a smile. “I’m glad you’re alright now. Sungie was so worried about you” The tone of his voice was different from the Hyunjin back home, his was soft and affectionate but Hyunjin’s was always hard and breathy.

“Of course I’m worried about my hyung! He’s my brother” Jisung exclaimed with a pout on his face. Huh? Do I really look like that when I pout? I heard someone giggle, it was Hyunjin. I turned to look at him and he was looking at Jisung, fondly?

Then the next thing I knew they engaged themselves in a heated conversation. It wasn’t like mine and Hyunjin’s interaction way back home, this one’s a lot friendlier and sweet (?) compared to us shouting and insulting each other.

“What’s going on with them?” I asked Felix. Felix turned to me and followed my line of sight. “Your memories are still in haze? Well Jisung likes Hyunjin but he doesn’t want to confess to him” my eyes widen. What?! My counterpart likes my enemy?? “He does?” I asked surprised. Felix nodded. “Since middle school if I remember it correctly”

Whatever universe I’m in, I will still like the same person huh?

“Tell me more” whatever happened to Jiwon, I’m glad I could somehow use it as an excuse to ask for information.

Felix surely told me everything. Jisung is just like me in all aspect, Jiwon was the quiet type he said and he got into an accident a month ago so that explains why Jisung wasn’t surprised when I wasn’t able to recognize him. But am I really Jisung or was I actually Jiwon? But anyway, Felix told me he was Jisung’s best friend. So perhaps our universe and this aren’t that different from one another. He told me about our friends and it’s the same.

But the only thing different is that, there’s no Jiwon in our universe.

He said my best friend was Minho hyung but he didn’t mention anything aside from that. Is that another difference from my world and this? In this universe, Minho hyung doesn’t like me? Oh. Wait. He can’t like Jiwon, it’s supposed to be Jisung.

I stared at him and Hyunjin. Huh? Will I and my Hyunjin also look like that if we don’t always fight with each other? Will it?

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I saw Minho hyung sitting with our other friends but unlike before, I didn’t feel anything upon seeing him. Perhaps it’s because he’s not the same Minho I knew. “Finally my best friend is back!” Minho hyung gave me a hug when we arrive on their usual spot.

“Of course I am” he acts like the same Minho from home but why isn’t my heart beating like crazy? I sat beside him and the others ordered food for us.

“Oh Channie! Here!” Minho hyung waved. I know it was Chan hyung based from the nickname. “Sorry babe, got held back in the student council” my eyes widen. Chan hyung and Minho hyung from this world are dating?! What?! Wait. This is not my home. Everything in here is opposite.

But is it really though?

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A week. I had been here for a week and I still couldn’t figure out a way how to get back. I need to get back. I miss my friends. I miss everyone. I miss my Hyunjin.

It had been a week already and during those seven days, I got closer with the Hyunjin from this universe. He’s like the Hyunjin I knew from childhood. The Hyunjin I admired from afar. I was merely observing them, they’re not different from my own friends and day by day I’m missing them more.

“Hyung come on help me pick an outfit for tonight” Jisung’s voice snapped me back to reality. “You know anything you wear is good already” Me and him were in front of our shared closet looking for the “perfect outfit”, his words not mine. “But hyung I should look appealing not a little potato. Something that would make Hyunjin hyung keep staring at me” Him and Hyunjin were going somewhere. I don’t know where as Hyunjin said it was a surprise so I didn’t ask him.

“Just wear an all black, that’s sexy” Well I find myself sexy in black so might as well see for myself. Jisung blushed as I rolled my eyes. One thing different from me and him, he’s easily embarrassed. “Oh come on just hurry up” I shoved him to the bathroom earning a series of protest from him. Is this what it feels to have a brother? It feels nice.

One week here and I could see how much Jisung likes Hyunjin. If only our relationship was like theirs, I wouldn’t miss my chance to tell him I like him. Yes. I admit. I like Hyunjin. And yes, I don’t feel anything for Minho hyung anymore. Spending time with this Hyunjin made me realize the Hyunjin back home isn’t different, he’s wearing a mask. And that’s because of me.

I know it’s wrong considering I’m in another world, but I can’t help but to like this world’s Hyunjin. His laugh, his smile, his voice, it was like my Hyunjin’s. And I could see how much this world’s Hyunjin and Jisung likes each other. I envy my counterpart. He’s lucky he has Hyunjin beside him.

“Hyung apply make up on me please!” I heard Jisung yell from inside the bathroom. “Wait up!” I yelled back. Oh how much I want to go back home and apologize to Hyunjin over and over again.

He didn’t deserve to be hated. I’m an asshole. I want to see him again.

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“Hey Ji” I looked up and saw Hyunjin sitting on the empty chair in front of me. I’m inside the library right on, not really studying and just scribbling things on my notebook. “Oh hey Hyunjin” he smiled at me. My heartbeat quickens. Jisung no. This isn’t your Hyunjin.

“What are you doing here alone?” he asked curiously. “Same with why you’re here?” he giggled. I imagined it was a long blonde haired boy giggling at me but it would eventually go back to the short raven haired boy.

“You got me there” he smiled. I returned back the smile. “You really like Jisung, don’t you?” he looked at me. “I really do” he answered sincerely. I could tell, he really has genuine feelings for him. Why did I had to realize in this universe that I really don’t hate Hyunjin? Why just now?

“Why don’t you confess to him?” why won’t I confess to my own Hyunjin? “I wanted to make it special” This Jisung is lucky, he’s not an asshole like me. “You know he doesn’t mind it as long as you’re with him” this Jisung deserve to be happy. “Yeah I know. This coming Saturday I’ll ask him out for real” he smiled then I smiled.

I know we’re the same person but why does it hurt? This isn’t even my Hyunjin anyway because my Hyunjin hates me.

“How about you?” he suddenly asked. “What about me?” I genuinely asked confused. “Don’t you like anyone?” I suddenly stopped breathing at that question. “Why’d you ask?” he shrugged. “Well ever since you came back, I could always see you alone and had your headphones with you or if not you’re either with Jisung and Felix only. I just got curious” he– he’s been observing me?

“I like someone” his eyes widened and his eyes twinkled in happiness. “Who?” he enthusiastically asked. “I won’t tell who” Hyunjin pouted. “That’s unfair. You know how I like your brother but you won’t tell me who you like” it’s because it’s you but also technically not you.

“That won’t work on me so I’ll take my leave now” I stood but he followed me. “But Ji that’s unfaaaaaiiiirrr” he continued being like that until we reached our classroom.

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“Hyung what should I wear tomorrow?” Jisung asked me as we were lounging on the couch. Right. Hyunjin will ask him out tomorrow. “Just be yourself Sung. Hyunjin won’t really mind what you wear tomorrow” of course Jisung doesn’t know Hyunjin will ask him to be his boyfriend tomorrow, he thought it’s just another hang out. Who even hangs out with just two people, constantly?

“Okay. Do you think blue suits me” he asked again. “Any color suits you if it suits me” with that statement he slapped my arm. “Hey! It’s not a lie alright” he giggled. I wish I had a brother in that other universe. Well Felix could count as my brother.

“I’m nervous about tomorrow” he confessed as he looked down on his lap. “Hey. Don’t be. Trust me everything’s gonna be alright” I patted his head. “Thanks hyung” Him and I are the same. We let our worries get the best of us.

“Hyung can you please come with us? I would feel safe if you were there”

“But Sung, I’ll just third wheel. And it’s best if it’s only the two of you”

“Hyung please? Just this once?”

“…”

“Fine. Stop looking at me like a squirrel. I’ll come with the both of you tomorrow”

“You’re the best!”

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When I agreed to come with them I wasn’t expecting to be out in the wilderness. Damn it Hyunjin and his hopeless romantic brain. I didn’t sign up for a sudden tour in the mountains.

“Why must you drag me here, Han Jisung” weird for me to call my own name but I got used to be called Jiwon so it doesn’t really feel that weird anymore. It happens that Hyunjin had been in this place before and there’s a nice spot here that he wants Jisung to see and he’ll ask him then.

We were walking for quite some time when Hyunjin told us we’d be crossing a bridge. “Just be careful though” wow the three brave people crossing a bridge how romantic. Hyunjin was holding Jisung’s hand while Jisung was holding my hand as we slowly cross the sturdy bridge. I have fear of heights and this isn’t on my bucket list.

“Careful guys” I wasn’t breathing all throughout I could only breathe when we finally crossed the bridge. Then Hyunjin led us to a random direction again. I just shrugged. He needs to ask Jisung as soon as possible before it gets dark or else.

We finally arrived after 15 minutes of walking. It was a cliff, it has a nice view and the air feels cold.

“This is what I was telling you guys”

“Hyunjin look behind you–!”

I wasn’t looking at them but when I heard Jisung screaming I hurriedly ran to them. My heart dropped at the scene before me. Jisung had one hand holding tight on the edge of the cliff but I didn’t see Hyunjin.

They slipped.

“Jisung!!” I panicked. I didn’t know what to do. My brother would die if I don’t save him. Hyunjin. Where’s Hyunjin?!

“Jiwon hyung!” Jisung cried for help. I held his hand tight. I won’t let go of him. I have to save him! “Hyunjin hyung! Don’t let go!” my eyes widened. Hyunjin’s still alive. “Don’t let go!” I screamed so Hyunjin could also hear. Shit!

“Jiwon hyung please help!” Jisung cried again. I held him tight and did my best to pull them on the safe grounds but it was too heavy for me. But no I won’t let go. Jisung was already crying. “Jisung don’t let go of Hyunjin!” I screamed at him. I could feel him getting weaker.

“Jisung-ah I love you” I heard Hyunjin’s voice from below.

No. No. No.

“Hyunjin hyung I love you too but we’ll get through this!” Jisung cried harder. I was pulling him but the extra weight from Hyunjin makes it difficult to do so.

“Hyunjin!” Jisung cried. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. No.

“Just let… me go”

“No! Hyunjin no!”

“Jisung-ah please just let me go”

“No!! I won’t let you die!” it was so hard to pull the both of them. I could barely pull Jisung but it’s not working. They’re getting heavier and heavier.

“I love you, Jisung”

“HYUNJIN!”

I didn’t know what happened but suddenly it feels less heavy. I managed to pull back Jisung but not Hyunjin. I collapsed on my knees. No. No. Hyunjin’s not dead. No.

Jisung was crying and it feels so real. Hyunjin’s gone.

“I shouldn’t have let go of his hand..”

That was the last thing I heard before all I could see is darkness for the second time.

──────────────────────────────

Hyunjin.

Hyunjin!

I gasped as I snapped my eyes open. My world feels like spinning. My lungs feel like burning, I felt as if I was drowning. I closed my eyes briefly.

I scanned my surroundings and I could tell the smell of hospital.

Hyunjin!

I tried to sit up but there’s someone holding my hand. They stirred awake and blinked at me.

“Shit! You’re awake Ji!”I could recognize that voice anywhere. It’s Felix.

“Wait I’ll go call the doctor and let the others know” I only looked at him. What happened?

Finally the doctor and some nurses came followed by a group of boys. I looked at them and my heart beat suddenly increased its pace. “Jisung-ah please calm down” the doctor said. We could hear the heart monitor beeping loudly but I could care less about that.

It’s him. He’s alive. Hyunjin is here.

My heart started to calm down. Felix held my hand as the others crowd around me.

“You made us worried, Jisung!” Changbin hyung.

“Hyung I thought you wouldn’t wake up anymore!” cried Jeongin.

“Don’t scare us like that” Chan hyung.

I’m back. I’m back!

I started crying. It was all just a dream.

“H–hyunjin” I mumbled out the words despite my crying. I looked at him directly and I could see how worried he was. I reached both my arms to him, he understood and went to hug me albeit unsure.

Oh how I missed this Hyunjin. I missed my Hyunjin. I could still touch him. He’s alive. He didn’t die. It was all a dream.

I don’t want to lose him again. I sobbed harder. He’s here, he’s blonde, it’s real. Hyunjin’s here, beside me.