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“It was your fault after all and now stop behaving this ridiculous and let’s get moving or we will be late for our rehearsal.”
Taiga shouldn’t let it pass like this, not again, but as so often he didn’t feel confident enough to do so. As so often he took the blame and tagged along like a dog on a leash.
It hadn’t been like this at first, but while he gave himself the fault for things turning out this way he knew that there was something else happening. Something he hadn’t seen coming at first and yet when the signs were more than obvious, he had been too dependent already.
The rehearsal ended with all of them exchanging smiles and filming random small stuff for YouTube. It was like always! While it had been all fake for Taiga, Hokuto couldn’t even bother to read the atmosphere and of course, it hadn’t been an invitation to his apartment, but an order.
After all, Hokuto took pleasure in the awful things he put Taiga through, not that he was ever going to admit that he could see past Taiga’s broken pride.
“Still sulking?” Hokuto asked when Taiga kept staring at the TV while hugging one of the pillows on Hokuto’s couch while the other one came back with a cup of tea, of course not having prepared one for Taiga.
There was no need for a reply, but Taiga slightly moved his head and he just knew that Hokuto enjoyed the way he was looking at him, and each time he would give in, Hokuto would take away more.
“What’s on your mind?” Hokuto asked with an intense stare back at the other one before he hurried to put the tea down and turn to Taiga instead.
“You like to think you’re never wrong.”
Here he had said it! That was on his mind and there was so much more!
At first, it had felt dangerous to let it out, but now he knew how much the other one enjoyed the things he said to him!
There it was; the amused expression when Hokuto got closer to him and reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind his ear. “Well, I know that you are wrong this time.”
Of course, he did know that; he lived what he learned after all. Always putting Taiga’s name to shame and enjoying the way he hurt himself to get back at him.
It was like a cruel game they were playing, no rules applying on either side, with the difference that Hokuto was the game maker, and Taiga wasn’t allowed to exit the game or reach the goal.
“Why do you want me to hurt as you did?” Taiga asked in a lower voice this time and Hokuto remained silent for a moment. As if taken out of the frame, Hokuto always tried to keep Taiga’s face covered from the others, always enjoying the fake expression he was giving in front of their friends.
This time Hokuto reached out for the other one’s hand and caressed the back of it with his fingers, before he took a stronger hold on it, possessive almost.
When he made Taiga let go of the pillow and tossed it to the ground Taiga knew that again he had forfeited the game.
Hokuto hovered over the other one so closely that Taiga fell back on the couch, another race he couldn’t run. Another night Hokuto had to act like he is someone while there should be another way. But he wouldn’t say anything this time, maybe also not next time.
“Because I need to share what I’ve been through,” Hokuto replied with dangerous intentions, leaving Taiga no choice, but to admit that once more he couldn’t run the race. The pace was too fast and he wouldn’t last!