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Stanley was pretty sure inviting Xeno for stargazing on the hill not too far away from their home just a week after Xeno had the audacity to look surprised when Luna asked him if they were dating was a stupid idea.
After all, Xeno seemed to have no clue that what they have been doing for the last few years could be considered dating. Seeing him all perplexed in front of Luna and telling him that they were not actually dating, hurt Stanley bad. Bad enough to make him storm out from the party which confused the hell out of Xeno.
They had a small fight about it during breakfast. Because apparently asking Xeno to his prom, flirting, kissing him numerous times, constantly touching him, holding his hand, even sleeping with him, spending every minute of their free time together, wasn’t enough to make Xeno consider him a boyfriend.
As smart as Xeno was, from time to time social interactions were completely alien to him. But still, Stanley couldn’t believe his obliviousness went this far. Or maybe it was Stan’s fault for just assuming. He didn’t know any more.
So here they were now, on the grass, looking at the stars and Stanley was going to address the subject they were avoiding for the last few days, or maybe actually years since it was a mature thing to do. Because apparently Xeno wasn’t going to act like a man here and admit that he was utter shit at human relationships.
Stanley wasn’t even angry any more. He knew it was partially his fault since he didn’t talk to Xeno before in the first place. Still, the main cause of the current situation laid on the other side.
To be honest, now that the talk was finally about to take place, Stan was really uncomfortable when he thought about the possible outcomes. Because Xeno was fucking insane.
“So today we had a lecture about Heisenberg’s uncertainty principle,” Stan brought up. “Nothing really new for me since you’ve been talking my ear off about quantum physics for over a decade now.”
“Because it’s a perfectly elegant approach,” Xeno scoffed. “But I’m glad you’re finally getting a proper formal education in physics, Stanley.”
“Anyway, the Heisenberg thing got me thinking. You can’t measure some things because the measuring act changes their nature already. And also, quantum mechanics says that there are things that are really improbable but they can still happen. And then I remembered when I got you drunk for the first time when we were seventeen and you were still going through your string theory teenage rebellion… and how after a few beers you started blabbering that maybe feelings were other dimension but then realized they could be particles or something like that? And you called it stupid when you sobered up? Well, assuming you were onto something, and feelings are acting like particles, they are falling under the laws of physics, so according to the uncertainty principle and general quantum physics, I definitely should confess to you and see if it works. Because it can always work even though to me it seems like it won’t, and even if not, the sole act of measurement changes the nature of things so maybe it will at least get you thinking.”
Xeno dramatically sat up. He was looking at Stanley with some strange determination in his eyes, reminding Stan of the time their elementary school teacher told him he wouldn’t be able to build a laser so he did, just prove his point.
“So yeah, just so you know and you can work through it with this big brain of yours,” Stanley continued. “I love you, not only as my best friend but also romantically. It would be nice of you to acknowledge that we’ve been already dating for a while too.”
“That was a truly inelegant speech, Stanley,” Xeno frowned. “So many simplifications, misconceptions and mixing in absurd theories with no ground to support them… but… it was kind of… not... entirely unpleasant.” he clammed up at the end, looking away with a slight blush on his cheeks.
Damn, Xeno was just too adorable from time to time. Before Stanley could say anything in reply, Xeno stood up and stretched out his hand.
“Give me your phone,” he demanded with a stern look that indicated that he wouldn’t take no for an answer.
Stanley was feeling slightly suspicious about it but reached into his pocket and placed the smartphone in Xeno’s hand.
“So…” Xeno said sounding oddly calm. “Newton says that when two objects are falling down, it doesn’t matter how dense they are, they actually fall simultaneously with the same speed. Like we’ve been doing up till now by doing all these things together. But it looks like we’ve finally hit the ground.”
With this said Xeno took out his own phone, scientifically modified by himself. He dropped both of them from the same height. Of course, the screen in Stanley’s iPhone cracked finely while Xeno’s fell heavily on the ground without a scratch. Stan stared at them in shock.
“Man. I expected you to break my heart, not both my heart and my smartphone. Why the hell would you do that?”
“Because I’m still mad about how you butchered my beloved quantum physics just now,” Xeno sent him a cold glare. “Anyway, it wasn’t mainly about breaking your iPhone, honestly I hoped it would happen but it was purely accidental. I wanted to show you that it isn’t until the point of impact in on ground that we can see the nature of things easily.”
“Yeah, I get the metaphor, my heart’s broken like the iPhone, your phone is sturdy as fuck and it’s completely fine,” Stanley let out a heavy sigh.
Suddenly, Xeno was kneeling right next to him, his face disturbingly close.
“I understand your devotion to your phone but it was an adequate price for that speech. And you’re missing my point completely. The point is that both phones fell heavy on the ground since they have similar density and elasticity.”
Stan blinked, slowly understanding the impact of what Xeno’s just said.
“You like me back.”
Xeno hesitated for a moment.
“… Probably. I’m not that good at feelings. And also I always assumed… it’s safer to be your childhood friend,” Xeno’s eyes darted away for a second. “Since you’re pretty, popular, better at social interactions and… To be honest, I might have rejected the possibility of dating you altogether a long while ago. I completely misread your intention when you first kissed me and all the other things… I just assumed you were bored or a curious teenager and since we always did everything together, it was a natural development. I didn’t think any romantic feelings were involved. I mean… The Internet told me that friends with benefits exist and the definition seemed mostly appropriate for our situation.”
“Yeah. Mostly. Like how I got us My Chemical Romance concert tickets for our anniversary,” Stan huffed.
“That was our supposed anniversary? You never said that. And also, I never agreed on dating you, so it was an imaginary anniversary, it doesn’t count.”
“How about all the times I told you I loved you?” Stanley sighed.
“You’ve been telling me you loved me since we were six,” Xeno looked away. “How was I supposed to notice the difference when you know I’m not good at this stuff? It fit the definition and I was sure we were friends with benefits.”
“You are really dumb, you know that?” Stanley said but instead of hearing a hash accusation, his voice came out soft. “And kind of slow.”
“I don’t have to be proficient in all areas, that’s what I have you for,” Xeno scoffed.
He finally relaxed a bit and sat down next to Stanley. The other boy didn’t wait around before interlocking their fingers. Xeno looked down on them, sighed and gave his hand a little squeeze.
At this point Stanley, couldn’t stop a broad grin from appearing on his face. He knew he had won.
“I get that you’re still unsure about how you feel... But how about promising to fix your boyfriend’s iPhone that you broke?”
“Wow, you really took it hard, didn’t you?”
“I told you that I consider it a metaphor for my broken heart. So be a good boyfriend and fix it.”
“Fine. I’ll fix it for you.”
“Because?” Stanley encouraged him to continue.
“Because you’re my boyfriend and perfectly working phone is essential for us to text freely. And I care about that,” Xeno suddenly looked up, daringly staring into Stanley’s eyes. It looked less like a confession, more like a challenge.
It was so adorable Stanley couldn’t help leaning in and gently pressing his lips against Xeno’s forehead. When he moved away, he saw a huge dark lipstick mark right in the middle of it and he couldn’t help a loud burst of laughter escaping his mouth.
“What?” Xeno asked harshly.
“Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Everything is perfectly fine,” Stanley smiled innocently.