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Summary:

Gordon didn’t know exactly what he thought living with Benrey would be like, but whatever his brain could’ve conjured up wouldn’t have looked anything like this.
--
AKA things actually end up good, for once.

Notes:

I've been reading and writing so much angst with these two lately, I really just wanted a fic where they were happy :'l writing this was so goddamn therapeutic ahhhhh i like seeing them happy. sometimes I rewatch hlvrai and i'm like 'i forget how fricken cute it is when benrey makes a joke and gordon laughs and everything seems ok for a second.'
I just want them to be ok
EDIT: did some art :')

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Gordon didn’t know exactly what he thought living with Benrey would be like, but whatever his brain could’ve conjured up wouldn’t have looked anything like this.

Back in Black Mesa, Benrey was nothing but a nuisance. He was loud and obnoxious and honestly it seemed like a lot of the more annoying stuff he did was specifically just to piss Gordon off. The guy’s entire existence was like a long running joke that everyone was in on but Gordon. Not to mention that Benrey was always flicking in and out of existence, doing weird magical shit, and was practically immortal. Dude could take a bullet to his fucking cranium and walk off with nothing more than a little headache.

Honestly, Gordon was more than a little relieved after the whole Benrey Boss Fight went down. Tommy’s dad told Gordon that Benrey should be gone for good, or at least not be any trouble, and oh man did that take a weight off of Gordon’s shoulders. Although… not as much as he would’ve thought. Even after everything returned to normal (and damn, wasn’t that a trip. No one but him and the Science Team knows about the alien invasions or the practical genocide of the United States Military. It was definitely hard rewiring his brain to worry about getting to work on time. He was so used to running for his life that everything else seemed so minute), Gordon couldn’t get his mind off of Benrey. He found himself waking up multiple times a week to nightmares about Benrey finding his house and killing him in his sleep. Other times he had dreams about being back in Black Mesa and floating around underwater, cracking up at Benrey’s silly muffled noises. For better or for worse, his thoughts always led back to Benrey.

So when Benrey showed up on his doorstep in the pouring rain about a year after the Boss Fight, Gordon was not as surprised as he should’ve been. He guessed that somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that he would never really be rid of Benrey.

Gordon was hesitant, but not enough to kick Benrey out. Of course he let him inside, how could he not? Benrey… did not look like his normal self, to say the least. He looked skinnier, very sickly. He didn’t have his usual get-up, only a grey long sleeve and some sweats. Guy didn’t even have shoes or socks.

Gordon remembers vividly how badly Benrey was shaking--how cold his hands were. The grey strands among his hair seemed more prominent and there was patchy stubble growing along his chin and up the sides of his face.

He looked completely and utterly human.

Turns out that Benrey managed to escape confinement. He didn’t elaborate on who was keeping him hostage or where he was or how he even found where Gordon lived, and well… Gordon never really had the heart to prod him on it. Whatever Benrey had gone through, it didn’t seem like something he wanted to talk about.

Gordon would’ve thought he’d be angry upon seeing him again, but god, he was more relieved than anything. He hated going back to his normal life. He had to deal with his nasty ex-wife getting pissed that Gordon had just up and disappeared for multiple weeks. He already had problems with getting Joshua for half of the week, and now she’d managed to widdle it down to only on the weekends. He had to find a new job, which was a whole fucking ordeal by itself. Despite his PhD and experience over at Black Mesa, he’d only managed to land a job over at a locally owned drive through restaurant. He got kicked out of his house for not paying his rent on time or getting back to the landlord. There wasn’t really any excuse there. It’s not like he could tell them that he was off fighting an alien apocalypse and didn’t have the time to make a phone call. Now he lives in a shitty apartment downtown with neighbors that are always fighting and getting drunk in the middle of the night.

Normal life sucked ass. Gordon would take taking care of Benrey over anything normal life could give him any day of the week.

After a few weeks, Benrey did sort of return to his normal self. Well, it turned out that whatever happened to him got rid of all of his powers, which was a little hard for him to adjust to. Benrey had never had to eat or perform any normal human functions his whole life, so Gordon had to teach him a lot. Besides that, he went back to his annoying, goofy old self. Although this time, it ground less on Gordon’s nerves. It was…. more endearing than before? Which was a weird word to use, but it fit well. Benrey would still tease him non-stop and make weird noises and do nothing but play video games all day but it wasn’t as antagonistic as before. It was just like Gordon was back in college again, sharing a dorm with a lazy roommate. Life seemed so much more normal and… well, better now that Benrey was back in it.

“Yo.” Gordon snapped out of his thoughts at the sound of Benrey walking into the living room* (*read: a couch in the center of the small-ass, shitty apartment), Nintendo Switch in hand. To Gordon’s surprise, Benrey seemed to pick up more interest in Animal Crossing than in any of the shooter games Gordon owned. Which was honestly fine with him because he never even really used the Switch anyways after he beat Breath of the Wild. “M’hungy. You should, uh, go get some food.”

"There's plenty of food here, dude. Just go make something."

"Dun wanna. M'dude KK's holding a show in a few mins. Can't be late."

"Doesn't he do a show, like, every week?"

Benrey looked up from the screen to shoot Gordon an unimpressed look.

"Dude's ballar, man. Voice of an angel. S'like a drug. Inject that shit right into my veins. I need it. You want me to die? Die of hunger and lack of, uh, lack of KK?"

"I want you to get a job and buy your own food," Gordon smirked.

Benrey sighed, looking back down at the screen. "Gonna fucken die, man. You're killin' me."

"Jokes on me, I'll probably be the one paying for your funeral."

"Nah man," Benrey shrugged, plopping down on the couch next to Gordon. "When I die jus, uh, cremate me. Make my ashes into a sick lookin' ps4 controller. Nice and cheap."

"Pretty sure that'd be really fucken expensive actually."

"You would know. MIT, nerd-ass."

"Are you trying to use the fact I have a PhD as an insult? 'Cause it's not, dude. Kinda a genius."

"If you call calculating the price of ash-ps4 controllers genius."

"I would. It was my major."

Gordon took pride in the little smirk that tugged on the corner of Benrey's mouth.

"Majored in gamer," Benrey mumbled, his eyes still glued to the Switch screen. "Well, since I'm talking to a real professional, real prof gamer collegeman over here, wanna uh… take a look at my house? gimme a rating?"

Gordon rolled his eyes, but scooted a little closer. “Fine. But I’m not holding back just because we’re friends. Gonna give you the harsh truth on how shit your house is.”

Benrey grinned, holding the Switch a little closer to Gordon, his hands practically resting in the other man's lap. “Gonna blow your fucken mind with how dope my house is, bro. Gonna fucken, uh, need to call up the hospital after this. Heart won’t be able to take the raw sexiness radiating off of my sick pad.”

Gordon let out a soft snort. “Prepare to get blasted, dude. Gonna roast the hell out of you.”

Gordon patiently waited as Benrey walked across the village and back to his house, his eyes at some point wandering up to look at Benrey’s face.

He seemed a lot healthier than when he was back at Black Mesa. His eyes were less sunken in, his skin had a nice pinkish tint to it rather than the murky grey it was before, and he smelled like the warm vanilla sugar shampoo he always insisted that Gordon buy for him. He had an old bottle stashed up in a drawer somewhere--probably something he accidentally took from his ex-wife a few years back and never got rid of--that Benrey found and apparently fell in love with. Not that Gordon was complaining. Benrey was a very touchy person with no concept of personal space, so he appreciated that he actually smelled good most of the time.

Gordon took in a deep, silent breath, taking in that sweet smell Benrey always carried with him. He was very reluctant about hygiene when Gordon first found him, but now he showered about every two days without even having to be told to. Gordon did most other things for him--cooked him food, did his laundry, washed his sheets, cleaned up the area around the couch that he slept on--but honestly he didn’t mind. Kept Gordon busy.

However, looking over Benrey now, Gordon suddenly realized how insane his hair was looking. He was used to it being all sweaty and matted down in Black Mesa, what with him wearing that stupid standard issue helmet all day, but now he never wore anything on his head. It definitely shouldn’t be as ratty as it was with how often he showered.

“When’s the last time you brushed your hair?” Gordon asked, making Benrey look up from the screen.

“Whu?”

“Your hair. Kinda lookin’ like a rat’s nest, dude.”

“Washed it this morning.”

“Well yeah, I know that, but did you brush it?” Gordon’s face dropped when Benrey’s fingers slowed on the Switch and he merely blinked instead of replying. “Dude. Don’t tell me you’ve haven’t brushed your hair before. You know what that is, right?”

“Like… with my fingers?”

Gordon groaned. “Jesus Christ. I really never showed you how to brush your hair?? How the fuck did I miss that? You’ve been here for months!”

Benrey just shrugged. “Sounds like a ‘you’ problem.”

Gordon shook his head, standing up. “No way, man. I am not letting this one slide. We’re brushing your hair right now.”

“No, duuuuuuddeee,” Benrey groaned. “Gotta look at my house.”

“You can show me while I do it,” Gordon called over his shoulder as he fetched a brush from the other room. “Trust me, it’ll be worth it. I mean--” Gordon waited until he was back in Benrey’s sight to gesture to himself. “You see this hair, man? You think it looks like this on accident?”

“Yea.”

“No. I wash and brush the shit outta this, get a trim every few months. Gotta work if you want it to look this perfect.” Gordon waved the brush at Benrey to get his attention. “Get on the floor.”

Benrey blinked a few times before registering what he had been told. “What?”

“On the floor," Gordon repeated. "It'll be easier to get the top of your head and I can just watch what you're doing."

Benrey hesitated for another moment, but then just shrugged. "Yeah, uh, ok." He slowly slid down the couch and slumped to the floor, burying his face back close to the screen in his hands.

Gordon walked over and sat on the couch behind Benrey, slinging his legs around either side of him. It's something he used to do a lot with his ex-wife because the woman was incapable of doing a decent braid, but something about this seemed miles more intimate then it ever had with her. Gordon hadn't realized how close he would actually be to Benrey until he was already in position. His back was pressed all the way up against the couch, so Gordon didn't have much choice but to rest each of his knees against Benrey's shoulders.

Benrey had always been super touchy, so it wasn't like the contact was really anything new, but something about the situation made Gordon's breath catch in his throat. His hands awkwardly hovered above Benrey's head and he nearly forgot why he was even here in the first place until Benrey spoke up.

"Yo, look."

Gordon looked down as Benrey held up the Switch, his little villager walking around the room to showcase the different objects he had collected.

"Oh," Gordon choked out. "Nice, dude."

Gordon let out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding in, shaking his head. Okay, so this wasn’t weird. Gordon was making it weird. It’s fine, everything’s cool. Just brush the guy’s hair while he plays his game, no big deal.

Gordon stalled a bit longer by watching Benrey walk around and tell him about the different rooms he had set up. It was… weirdly nice just listening to him talk. Even though the fact that Benrey was sitting between his legs was making Gordon’s head spin and his stomach do little somersaults.

“Pretty sick, huh?”

Gordon nervously laughed, looking off to the side. “Okay okay, fine. I’ll admit it’s-it’s a pretty good house. You were right.”

“Gotteem.”

A comfortable silence fell over the room as Benrey continued to play his game and Gordon idly watched him, only broken by Gordon clearing his throat when he realized he still had yet to complete the task that brought him to this in the first place.

“Okay, so, when you brush your hair, it’s important to start from the bottom,” Gordon explained, though his hands stayed stationary at his sides. “If you brush from the top it, uh, it can pull out your hair and make more knots. And just, like, be gentle I guess? After a while you’ll get a feel for your hair, but I would be soft at first. Don’t want you, like, ripping it all out or something, I dunno. Seems like something you might do. Shit takes a while to grow back--or, I guess… you’re kinda older so it might not grow back?”

Benrey snorted. “Dude, I’m not an old geezer or anythin’. Only, like, 42.”

Something in Gordon’s brain short-circuited at actually hearing Benrey’s age. He figured he was older, since his hair had more than a few grey strands in it, but wow. He really was a good 15 years older than Gordon. At least that took away the mystery of him possibly being hundreds of years old, though. He must really just age like a normal guy. Huh.

Gordon shook himself out of it again when he realized he’d been silently staring off into space for a while, loudly coughing into his fist. “W-Well anyway, you should be fine. Just don’t go too crazy and I’m sure you won’t, like, accidentally make yourself bald.”

“Tight.”

Swallowing, he took in one last deep breath before lifting up his brush. Just brushing a friend's hair. It’s cool, just chill the fuck out.

Before getting down to the nitty-gritty, Gordon gauged how bad it was by running a hand through Benrey’s hair. It was tangled up, alright, his fingers having a hard time getting through. He was slow and soft though, as to not accidentally hurt him. Despite not being brushed in over more than a few weeks, it wasn’t overwhelmingly tangled up. It shouldn’t be hard at all to straighten out.

Growing more bold when Benrey just kept silently clicking away at his Switch, Gordon brought down the brush and got to work. It didn’t take long at all to get through, Benrey’s hair being very cooperative and untangling almost the instant it met with the brush’s bristles. His hair was very thin, and fluffy from him just having showered a few hours prior, and was very nice to the touch. It was so soft against Gordon’s fingers and he couldn’t help but lean down a bit and take a few whiffs of that nice vanilla sugar scent.

It was only after Gordon finished that he noticed Benrey had set the Switch down in his lap and was now just leaning back and letting Gordon do his thing. Gordon couldn’t see Benrey’s face from this angle, but he imagined him with his eyes closed, his cheeks slightly flushed and his mouth pulled up in a soft, comfortable smile. Something about the thought had Gordon blushing down to his chest, his knees suddenly very hot where they made contact with Benrey’s arms.

He was finished. He could just stand up and say he’s done and he could easily put this whole thing behind him, but Gordon couldn’t bring himself to do it. Instead, he found himself setting down the brush, planting both of his hands in Benrey’s hair and gently running his fingers through it.

His breath hitched when he could feel Benrey lean back into his touch, his back slightly arching against where he leaned on the couch. He froze for a moment when Benrey brought up his arms to rest on Gordon’s legs, but he somehow found the will to continue. He began pressing a little harder, massaging his fingertips into Benrey’s scalp, slightly leaning to the side to try and catch a glimpse at his face. Before he could, however, Benrey let out a soft content sigh that had Gordon reeling.

Gordon had never found himself attracted to a man before. The thought had honestly never really crossed his mind, but holy fuck if he didn’t want to kiss Benrey right now more than anything. There was a lot to unpack in that realization, but Gordon’s head was too full of static to think about anything right now other than softly pressing his lips against Benrey’s temple and taking in his scent and making him let out more of those wonderful little noises he was making. All of that, however, was overpowered by the fact that heat was quickly pooling between Gordon’s legs and holy fuck Benrey was right there and if he didn’t do something he thought his head might explode.

Before he could really make a decision, Benrey leaned back his head into Gordons lap. He was right, his eyes were closed, but he wasn’t smiling. His eyebrows were drawn up into an expression than Gordon could really only describe as ‘needy,’ and oh boy oh fuck Gordon is going to die looking at that expression. He wants that beautiful face Benrey is making to be the last thing he sees.

At some point, Gordon’s hands must’ve stilled because now Benrey was opening his eyes in confusion, apparently from the lack of touch. Gordon looked down and Benrey looked up and they locked eyes and before Gordon even knew what was happening, he was leaning down and locking his lips upside down onto Benrey’s.

Gordon tightly closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, his whole body relaxing at the smell of vanilla and the faint taste of mint. The kiss was chaste but it felt more intimate that anything Gordon had done with anyone else before. It was a cheesy, stupid thing to say but honestly Gordon would be content if kissing Benrey like this was the farthest he would ever go with physical contact ever again. In the moment, it seemed like everything Gordon would ever need again.

Fuck fuck fuck, when had Gordon gotten in this deep??

Finally, he found himself pulling back and slowly opening his eyes.

Okay, this was it. This was the part where Benrey laughed in his face and called him Gayman and made the whole thing out as a joke. This was where the weird domestic illusion Gordon had created ended, the other shoe dropped and Benrey started fucking with him again.

...Only, that’s not what happened.

Gordon looked down at Benrey and Benrey was looking back up at Gordon, but there was no malice in his eyes. Benrey simply stared at Gordon with a dumbfounded look before passing him a nervous, sideways smile.

“Uh,” Benrey breathed. “Pog as fuck, dude. Fucken… holy shit, uh, do that again? Please?”

Now it was Gordon’s turn to say, “wuh?”

Benrey just laughed, a genuine amused little cackle that had Gordon feeling all bubbly inside. He puckered his lips into an adorably stupid kissy face, bringing his hand up to rest on Gordon’s cheek.

“Kisses for Benny?”

Gordon hesitated a moment before laughing, a sob catching in his throat for a reason he wasn’t exactly sure of. Before he could do something weird like start crying all over Benrey, he leaned down and kissed him again instead. This time, Benrey slightly parted his lips, inviting Gordon to trail his tongue along his teeth and kiss him deep and slow until Gordon’s breathing became heavy and Benrey was practically panting into his throat. It was sloppy and probably looked ridiculous from an outside perspective but oh my god it was the only thing Gordon swore he would ever need again.

When they finally pulled apart, Gordon didn’t waste any time planting kisses all along Benrey’s face and trailing them down his neck until Benrey was a giggling mess in Gordon’s lap.

“Fuck, man,” Gordon said against Benrey’s temple. “That’s--god, you’re--fucken uh… that was fucking amazing. You’re amazing. I want to… I wanna do this, like, all the time. I never wanna--that was--y’know?”

Benrey smirked up at him. “Can see you didn’t major in English over at nerd school.”

Gordon laughed. “Shut up, man. I’m really tryin’ here.”

“Well, uh, my answers a big old Fuck Yeah. Do that shit to me any time of the week, Gordon.”

Gordon smiled at the sound of him saying his first name. He laughed, tightly wrapping his arms around the back of Benrey and holding him close.

He could get used to this.

Notes:

If you wanna scream about these boys to me, hmu on Insta dude, i could literally talk about them all fucken day SOBBEING also I might draw some fanart of this fic soon and post it there so *eyes*