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Max Tate has been a selective mute since he was six years old. And despite only knowing Kai for a few months now, he’s the only that Max will talk to. And it isn’t at a normal volume, mostly just whispers in Kai’s ears.
Max’s voice was soft and revealed so many more emotions than his hand signals did. It could be loud when they are alone, and quiet when they are not. Max’s voice has reached levels that should not be reached by a twelve year old. He expresses joy, despair, frustration, anger, and indifference so easily with his voice that Kai didn’t even need to see him sign anymore.
Even though the Bladebreakers knew to communicate with him through a universal sign language, Max seemed to only want to talk to Kai. Kai was the only who knew what Max sounded like. Kai was the only one who has heard Max’s real laugh which is loud instead of silent. At first, he didn’t mind. But after a while, it began to make no sense to him why Max chose him to be the person he wanted to talk to. Maybe it was because Kai was the oldest. Maybe it was because Kai was the leader. But it still made no sense. Kai knows things he doesn’t want to know, but he still doesn’t know why.
“I don’t know,” Max supplies as an answer as they walked around the park.
Currently, the Bladebreakers were on their American leg of the competition. They had just met Max’s mom and her team, and honestly, Kai wasn’t impressed. But he sensed that something was wrong with the youngest member. So he dragged him outside to the local park.
“I just... picked you, I guess. Sometimes I don’t even make that decision. My brain just starts talking? I don’t know. Sorry.”
Kai thinks that Max has nothing to be sorry for. Although he is surprised that Max subconsciously picks who to talk to and when. So was his mute selective or not?
“You might have noticed that I don’t talk to my mom either. But I do talk to my dad. You’re just special, I guess.”
Kai stops walking. And Max turns to face him. Special? Kai thinks bitterly. Kai was nothing. He was just a meaningless speck in an otherwise unknown corner of the ever-expanding universe. He would die and no one would care. Except for Max.
Because even though Kai hasn’t done anything to deserve it, he can tell that Max admires him. And that’s probably why his brain chose him and not Tyson or Chief or Ray. Just Kai.
“I’m sorry if that made no sense. It’s just... I’ve never spoken to more than three people before. My dad, my speech coach, and you are the only ones who have heard me speak. So... I don’t know. Ah, uh, I’m sorry?”
And Kai thinks it’s cute how Max can’t have a proper conversation with someone around his age. And he’s flattered that Max picked him. But he’s also terrified that Emily was right. That she was right that Kai doesn’t want to spend time with his teammates because he would grow to like them. And even though Kai doesn’t want to, he can’t help but want to spend more time with them. Especially Max.
Nudging him with his foot, Kai turned around. “Come on. It’s almost dinner time. We should get back.” And Max follows.
That’s that thing about Kai and Max. Max was like a puppy who trusted fully in his master (Kai) and would follow him to the ends of the earth. This might have been a subconscious thing in the beginning, but Kai is now starting to understand why. Max trusts him, whether he wants to or not, and Kai feels like he wants something more. And Max seems to want that too.
While on tour with the Bladebreakers, it has come to Kai’s attention that Max and him have very similar sleep schedules. Max always wants to bed with Kai no matter how much begging he gets from Tyson. And Kai realizes why while in America. Max has nightmares. And not the ones where it is easy to recognize.
No, Kai had to learn how to recognize that Max was in a nightmare. Max would be sleeping silently, and instead of screaming, his breathing would stop. He would go tense and start whimpering. But it was so silent that Kai would always strain to hear this. It took him a while to figure out how to wake Max up. His brain told him to shake the blonde. But that would hurt. So he chose to wake him up by talking. It was always a random subject and Max would wake up. Then they’d talk and fall asleep.
Tonight, Kai was the one with the nightmare. He couldn’t tell what was going on subconsciously, but he knew what was happening to his physical body. His muscles locked up and he struggled to breath or move. Opening his eyes, Kai tried to see but all he saw was darkness. It was so cold. Kai could feel his body surrendering to a cold darkness that seemed to extend forever.
A warm hand touched his cheek. “Kai, hey, it’s me. It’s okay. You’re okay.”
Suddenly, Kai could see again. The curtains were open and Kai could see the city skyline and Max hovering over him. His stammering heart slowed down as he looked into those bright blue eyes. Max’s dyed blonde bangs settled right on top of his eyelashes, and framed his young face perfectly. It hurt to look at him.
Max began to move away, and Kai was desperate to keep him in bed. He needed Max to be here (no reason other than the fact that it made the nightmares stop). But he couldn’t move at all. And he needed Max to stay next to him. This was the one time he didn’t want to be left alone. Fortunately, his jaw unlocked and he could speak again.
“Wait, Max,” the boy stopped. “Come back. I need—.”
Max makes a face and crawls back into bed. “What do you need me to do?”
“I don’t know.” And Kai hates how he repeats what Max said earlier. But he doesn’t know what he needs, he just needs Max here.
Max seems to understand. He lays his head right over Kai’s heart, wraps an arm around his waist, and entangles their legs together. Kai can already start to feel himself relax. Max shifts around more so that he can place his mouth near Kai’s ear.
“Should I sing you a lullaby to help you sleep? I know you don’t want to talk about your nightmare, so I can help by singing.”
Kai nods, “That sounds fine.”
Max begins to sing softly. And Kai can feel his muscles relax. He can tell that Max does not have much practice with singing but he still sounds spectacular. There’s a certain way he carries the melody that makes Kai feel like he’s at home. Kai doesn’t speak much Japanese, but it sounds like it was made for Max and Max only. It was beautiful.
Within a minute of the song, Kai’s body had fully unlocked and relaxed. At one point, his hand started petting Max’s luxuriously soft hair. And it seemed that Max would be falling asleep anytime soon. But he kept waking himself up for Kai’s sake.
“Max, go to sleep. I’m okay now.”
The blue eyed angel looks up at him, “Are you sure, Kai?”
Kai nods and within seconds Max has fallen asleep on his chest. And he’s looking at him for two more minutes before his body is succumbing to subconscious. Kai’s last thought before he falls asleep is that Max is pretty special too.