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Without the help of others, he can’t remember what his first word was, or when he first spoke it.
The first time he laughed, the first time he cried… When had that been?
Did he cry when his father passed? He thinks so, but it’s been too long to know.
His first dreams are a mystery that he’ll never figure out. A child’s mind is a wondrous place.
Even if he hates it, he can’t remember the first friend he had, either. (Maybe it had been something short, if he can’t even recall a name.)
Though he would rather forget, he remembers his first love a little too well.
And he can’t remember the first time he laid his eyes on Haruka(they had just been passing each other in a crowd, after all), but he remembers the second time, and he’ll remember every time after that.
--
It was nearing two weeks since Rin had been transferred to Iwatobi, stationed at a police box in one of the smaller neighborhoods in the town. The change of scenery wasn’t awful, and he rather preferred it to the busy city streets that he was once located on. Clean roads with bushes and trees, a view of the ocean if you were willing to take a short walk.
The change of pace, however, was something totally different.
In Tokyo, there had been more to do, he felt. In Iwatobi, the most exciting thing he would find himself doing was helping an old woman home, or chasing after some brats who thought it was absolutely hilarious to make fun of the uniform. (Or his long hair, which managed to stab at his pride bit by bit.)
When Rin had first decided he would live out his life as a policeman, his mind had wandered, turning the ordeal into something far more extravagant than it actually was. Car chases with flashing lights and howling sirens, drug busts that he bravely put his life on the line for, beating criminals to the ground and taking them in... He had been wrong. Really, he hardly moved up in the ranks; all he got to do was simply hear those stories and imagine himself in such magnificent scenarios.
And then he got the news that he would be packing up and moving to Iwatobi, his boss stating that it was a place better suited to him. Whatever the hell that meant.
At the most, though, he wasn’t alone. With Sousuke, a childhood friend of his that had a mutual interest in the workforce, sharing the same shift as him, and Kisumi sometimes joining them to brighten the atmosphere, the days passed by as easily as breezes blew through the leaves and made them tremble. Spring was right around the corner, too, and that only meant that the neighborhood’s sakura trees would be in bloom soon. Each time he thought of it, his heart would dance, certainly looking forward to the season.
His mind filled with ideas of picnics under the trees, he nodded as a pair of elderly women passed by their box, wearing a smile when he heard them giggle as they walked off, and even catching a “handsome” being said in their hushed conversation. His cheeks warmed in an instant and he tucked a loose strand of hair behind his ear as he reveled in the whispered compliment.
“Rin. It’s your turn to do the rounds.” Peeking back at Sousuke, who sat at his desk flipping through some magazine Rin didn’t care enough to ask about, he nodded.
He supposed that was another nice thing about small neighborhoods; leisurely rides through the streets, waving at citizens as he passed them, having a bit of time to himself in the midst of the routine journey. If one were to ask, Rin would brag that he thought he looked pretty damn good with the wind blowing through his hair. (No one ever asked, of course.)
Climbing onto his designated bicycle and giving Sousuke an, “I’m off!”, Rin rode forwards, turning one of the corners and heading down a small slope. He had already set a routine path for himself, and he very seldom wandered from it. Because of that, he hadn’t given himself a lot of time to actually explore the neighborhood he was supposed to be watching over, but he figured it was probably useless. Everything was too peaceful around these parts for anything particularly dangerous to be happening.
Gliding over the pavement, turning corner after corner, he paused at one and leaned against his handlebars, taking a moment to shut his eyes and enjoy the fresh air that only smaller towns could provide. The wind brought the scent of the ocean with it, drifting past him and ruffling his hair, making the corners of his lips turn up into a smile.
A second later, he was met with an unfamiliar, newer scent. Something warmer, despite the chillier air that surrounded him. He couldn’t pinpoint what it was at first and decided to move on, only for the smell to return a few minutes later as he came to a street he had never wandered onto before. Staring down the length of it, he pondered whether taking a detour would be a good decision or not.
Well, a little adventure wasn’t out of character for him, and it wouldn’t hurt, either. Turning onto the road, he did his best to follow the scent, noticing that the intensity increased the farther along the street he went. It only overwhelmed him near the end of the road, where he paused and turned his head to a single building.
Small tables with glass tops sat out front, only two chairs to each one, making it look quaint and welcoming. Rin had no idea something like this was around the neighborhood, but it was easy on the eyes, a nice sight. Maybe he could stop by during his lunch breaks every once in a while. With a smile, he got off his bike and leaned it against the building, looking up to the sign and having to do a doubletake.
“Cafe… Saba…?” Question after question popped into his mind, all relating to fish. Grimacing, he wondered just what kind of menu this place had and pushed the door open, hearing a bell jingle overhead.
The place was empty, despite the heavenly smells that hung in the air that complimented the homely looking interior. Stepping further in and crossing arms, he glanced around, not finding a single soul even at the front counter. Was it unpopular? Was it even open yet?
Hesitating, he went up to the counter, a glass case with dozens of sweets resting inside. Rin leaned against it and waited, tapped his fingers against the smooth marble surface. There was a menu, but when he read through it, checking twice just to make sure he was reading it right, he had to ask himself just what kind of cafe this place was.
Only pastries and desserts riddled the menu, the words artfully drawn in chalks of blues and pinks. Rin wasn’t a culinary expert, but he was pretty damn positive that cafes were supposed to have more of a variety to them. What were people supposed to do? Come here to get a toothache? Was the owner a dentist in disguise?
Absorbed in reading the menu for a third time, Rin didn’t notice when a new voice first called out to him. It was only when another person was blocking his view that he jumped back with a small cry, coughing to cover it as he felt his cheeks heat up.
“Is there a problem, officer.” After getting himself together and eyeing the other man, Rin was shocked when he felt his voice catch in his throat, his eyes meeting a beautiful blue color.
Clear was the first word that came to his mind, and when he finally was able to tear his gaze away, he realized that he had been staring for a bit too long. “Ah.” Coughing once more into his fist, he shook his head, offering a smile. The other, donned in an apron with a few stains decorating it’s pearly white surface, didn’t return it. “No, uh, I was just stopping in to see what the place was like. Is it new around here? It’s pretty empty. Not many customers?”
“We’re closed.”
“Oh.”
Well. Now Rin just looked like some kind of petty jerk. The other man’s eyes wavered, and Rin followed his gaze. A sign hung in one of windows, and he noticed the opening and closing times scrawled on it, learning that he just happened to be an entire hour early.
But really, was it his fault? What kind of self respecting business left their doors unlocked? If it were Rin, he’d have the common sense to know better. Pursing his lips and shoving his hands into his pockets, he looked to the menu once more.
“I didn’t realize,” he admitted, his tone gruff. “Sorry for barging in. But, uh, since I’m here, I might as well order something. To make up for it?” He tried another smile, and usually, those won him some kind of grin in return, maybe even a laugh.
Not this time, though. The man, who Rin could only assume to be the owner, only knitted his brows together and grimaced, as if Rin was being some kind of nuisance. If that didn’t serve to light some kind spark in Rin’s heart, Rin didn’t know what would. Seriously, what kind of owner was so rude to customers?
“What do you want,” he asked, but it didn’t sound like a question at all. To Rin’s ears, he heard a, “Hurry up and get out.”, kind of thing. Narrowing his eyes, Rin clicked his tongue and read over the menu once more, finding that absolutely nothing appealed to him. In the first place, he didn’t even like sweets, so when it was the only thing being offered to him, nothing stood out.
But if he just lingered and chose nothing, it would make him seem like some indecisive dummy who was only there to waste the owner’s time. Breathing out through his nostrils, he finally decided on something easy. “I’ll just have a small coffee, then. Black, please.”
The look he received really served to piss him off further. It was like the owner was mocking his taste buds, or maybe thinking to himself that Rin was just trying to be cool. But Rin didn’t say anything about it, donning a stiff grin instead
When the owner turned away to start on the order, Rin leaned against the counter again, watching him closely. “So, where’s the breakfast options? Or the lunch ones? Dinner?”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about how your menu only has sweets. It’s a cafe, not a cake shop.” The owner glanced back at him with a brow quirked up on his forehead, eyes icy. Rin only shrugged. “I’m just saying that maybe you should add some more variety? I mean, even the name of this place makes it seem like it would at least have fish or something. It’s totally false advertising.”
The other didn’t bother with replying, only turning around to set the styrofoam cup in front of Rin and begin to ring him up. Rin scoffed and dug the money from his wallet, placing 500 yen down and grabbing the cup.
“Your change--”
“Keep it. Consider it funding to the cause of getting more options.” Before Rin turned away, their gazes locked once more, a little fire in both pairs of eyes. Being held for a good few beats, Rin broke the staredown first. On his way out, he gave one small wave, grabbing his bike and walking it along.
As soon as he had turned the corner, making sure to check if he was alone on the street, he immediately leaned against a wall, groaning and rubbing at his cheeks. What the hell was his problem? He was a goddamn police officer and he had been purposely rude to a citizen, let alone someone as fucking cute as this guy had been? He could never show his face in that cafe again, right? He’d look like a damn fool!
...No, there was a simple solution. He just wouldn’t show his face in the cafe again. Then everything was settled and he could move on. Really, he had been through much worse in the past. What was just a little embarrassment here and there?
...More than he could really take. Lifting the cup to his lips, he took one sip, feeling the warm and bitter liquid slide down his throat and into his stomach. Whatever. If he could forget about it within two days, it wouldn’t matter anymore. It would be out of his hair.
Repeating that to himself, cheering himself on silently, Rin finished off the drink and tossed it into a trash bin, climbing back onto his bike and riding as far away as possible from the cafe, hoping that the winds of Iwatobi would carry his problems away with them.
--
“...Lunch?”
Rin didn’t understand what Sousuke meant at first, leaning his bike against the police box. It wasn’t until he saw the neatly wrapped bento sitting on his desk that he got a vague understanding. Removing his hat, he glanced between Sousuke and the box, a brow quirked up
“Yeah. Someone brought it for you.”
“...For real?” His mind didn’t immediately come up with any culprits. The only people he could just barely manage to think of would be his mother or his sister, and considering that they lived in a different city, and the fact that they had never specially brought him lunch before, he seriously doubted it had been them.
“Yeah. Any idea who it was?” Rin shook his head at the question, taking a seat and carefully unwrapping the polka dot printed cloth. “It looks cute.”
“What did they look like? The one who left it. I didn’t specifically ask anyone to bring me anything.”
“A man brought it,” he answered, hovering over Rin’s shoulder as he lifted the top of the bento box off. “He was around your height--”
Sousuke went quiet when the contents of the lunch were revealed. Filled to the brim with rice, only a single piece of some kind of fish sat in the very middle, a wonderful scent wafting from it that made both of their stomachs grumble.
The two friends exchanged an odd look before Rin grabbed the chopsticks, hesitating. “Uh…”
“Grilled mackerel…” Knitting his brows together, Sousuke stood straight, trying to figure out how to describe the man to Rin so they could solve this little mystery that had arrised. “He was around your height--”
“What did he say when he left it?”
“He only said it was for the officer with the long hair and scary teeth, so it was obvious it was for you.”
Sticking his tongue out at Sousuke’s backhanded comment, Rin lifted the piece of fish up, taking one bite and pausing, a little smile playing at his lips. It tasted incredible, as if it had been made to perfection. “Who did you say brought this again?”
A heavy sigh leaving him, Sousuke began to describe the man again, hoping that there would be no interruption from Rin this time. “He was around your height. I’ve seen him around the neighborhood before… Uh, blue eyes--”
Flinching when Rin hacked and beat a fist at his chest, Sousuke pursed his lips, feeling a twinge of worry when his friend stared at him with wide eyes that only held what he could describe as shock.
“Gross. You almost coughed it up--”
“Blue eyes?” Rin cut him off, grimacing when Sousuke nodded.
Looking back to the meal, Rin put the chopsticks back down, his appetite disappearing, only to be replaced with pure confusion and a twist in his stomach. Surely there couldn’t be anyone else, but the real question was, why? It had been a week since then! Hadn’t Rin pissed that guy off? He was pretty damn positive he had. That harsh stare was totally unforgiving, no matter how beautiful the man’s eyes had been.
Leaning forward, he pinched the bridge of his nose, rubbed at his temples, inhaled deeply.
The only thing he could do was find out for himself. That was the proper policeman way, right?
After all, he couldn’t just keep such a lovely bento box for himself.
--
Whatever Rin had planned on saying to the cafe’s owner vanished once he had turned the corner onto the street, braking to try and gather his thoughts before the actual conversation. He didn’t need to be gone long, and he didn’t need to focus solely on this place when making his rounds, so it would have to be something short and sweet...
Could he even do something like that? It wasn’t like he exactly wanted to have a drawn out discussion with the other man, but when he got down to it, Rin had to admit that he wasn’t all that good at shutting up.
He took a deep breath, ruffled up his hair before smoothing it back, and rode forward, his heart nearly stopping when he saw the owner actually standing outside of the cafe. Had he been waiting for Rin or something? Somehow, that sounded like a romantic movie--
Ah, no. He was sweeping. Okay.
Riding up and climbing off of his bike, letting it rest against the building’s front, Rin stood in silence as the owner peered at him. His blue eyes were certainly piercing, as if they could look into Rin’s psyche or something. This was hardly the time to be worrying about mind reading citizens, though.
Clearing his throat once, twice when he felt he needed to, Rin followed up with a bow, head low. “Thank you very much for the meal!”
Rin didn’t dare look up at the other, but when he didn’t say anything and Rin’s back began to ache, Rin stood straight again, gnawing on his lower lip as he held out the bento, washed and neatly wrapped once again. The man stared him down before taking the box into into his own hand, stiffening when Rin flinched as their fingers brushed.
“You didn’t have to return it.”
“Ah, well… It woulda been wrong for me to have kept it. Besides, I wanted to, uh, ask you something?” The other waited in silence, one brow raising up. Taking that as permission to continue, Rin spoke again. “Uh, why?”
“Why what?”
...That was obvious. Rin felt like he shouldn’t have to explain, but apparently, he did. “Why did you bring me lunch? You don’t even know my name-- How did you know where I worked?”
“We only have one police box in this neighborhood.”
Oh. He was right. Going tight lipped, Rin looked to the pavement, softly kicking at a pebble that lay near his feet.
“Th-that still doesn’t answer my first question… Again, why did you bring me lunch? Didn’t I make you angry the last time I was here? I mean, you still look angry, so--”
“I’m not angry.” Putting the bento onto one of the tables, the man returned to sweeping, his back turned to Rin. “And you didn’t make me angry last time, either.”
“For real?”
“For real.” Peering back at Rin, their eyes locked, but only for a few short seconds. “The lunch, though… I’ve been wanting to add new things to the menu, but I’m not confident that they would sell. Sweets are more popular. It had been out of my mind until you brought it up.” He paused, scoffing. “Or, rather, you were the first to complain about it.”
Now that was a jab. Lowering his head, Rin mumbled out a small apology, rubbing at the back of his neck. “It had just confused me, is all.”
“If it confused you, it probably confuses others, too. And since you were the first to bring it up, I figured I’d let you be the first to try out the possible future meals...”
...What? Was that really the whole thing behind this little fiasco? Staring at the back of the owner’s head, Rin had to hold in a snort, but it escaped him regardless. Looking to Rin, those blue eyes filled with surprise, Rin waved it off, even if he wanted to keep laughing.
“Isn’t that kind of...eccentric? Like, that’s so… You’re kind of weird, aren’t you?”
He visibly bristled up at the comment, his grip on the broom’s handle tightening. “I’m not weird. It’s a good idea. Don’t laugh at me.”
“No, it’s just, there had to be something different you could have done, right? Like, not having to go out of your way to bring lunch to a total stranger.” Rin laughed again when he noticed a tint of pink on the other man’s cheeks, but hurriedly coughed into his fist, trying to brush it off and not offend the guy.
Before he could continue, though, the owner interrupted. “My name is Nanase Haruka. I own this cafe.”
“Huh?”
“Who are you.”
“Oh.” Standing a little straighter, Rin hesitated before answering. “Matsuoka Rin.”
The man, Haruka, nodded once. “Now I didn’t bring it to a total stranger.” He didn’t let Rin cut in. “I brought it to you because I figured you would give me your opinion straight out. My friends don’t like to tell me what they honestly think.”
“Ah…” Neither spoke immediately after that, Rin trying to understand completely what Haruka was saying. When he pieced it together, he cut the silence, wearing a gentle smile. “If you want the truth, I’ll give it to you. Honestly, this was the first time anyone had brought me lunch, so it actually made me… Well, I was happy. Since I don’t have a lover or anything--”
“Lover?”
Feeling his face warm, Rin rushed to cover up his words. “I mean, not saying it’s a lover only type of thing…! Listen, I’m just telling you, I was really thankful for it. I usually just go to the convenience store to get my lunch, so for it to be specially made… And for it to be really good, too…”
He trailed off, lowering his eyes until he heard Haruka’s footsteps on the pavement, inching closer to him. He almost wanted to step back, but was frozen stiff when he found Haruka’s eyes staring at him in wonder, a small twinkle in their blue depths.
“It was good?”
“Y-yeah…” Licking his lips, Rin nodded, donning a grin. “Yeah! Really good! I mean, it was really simple, but I liked it a lot! You should definitely add it to the menu!”
“Really?”
“Really.”
A few beats passed before the tiniest smile appeared on Haruka’s lips, making Rin’s heart involuntarily flutter. Stepping away from one another, neither said anything at first, and Rin was surprised when Haruka was the first to speak again.
“Then… I’ll keep bringing you lunch.”
“Wait, what? For real?” Wasn’t that way too nice? Rin felt as if he didn’t deserve anything like that. It had only been one compliment… “I don’t want you to have to take time out of your day to do that for me--”
“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.” The smile, that fucking adorable smile, was gone now, but oddly enough, the air surrounding Haruka had changed into something lighter. He was almost as welcoming as the store he owned. “Your opinions would be appreciated. So… Please.”
He gave Rin a small bow, and Rin didn’t know what to say at first, his heart leaping into his throat. “A-alright! I’ll accept it, but you don’t have to be so formal!”
When Haruka lifted his head again, he nodded once before turning away from Rin, continuing his sweeping. All Rin did was stand there for a solid minute, trying to process everything, before he let out a light breath, beaming when Haruka wasn’t looking. Somehow, for some reason, he was really looking forward to this, and it left his heart feeling warm.
--
Whatever he had felt at that moment was long gone after a week had passed, a sense of weariness taking its place.
The day after their conversation in front of the cafe, Rin had eagerly returned from his rounds to find a bento waiting for him, Sousuke stating that it was specifically left for Matsuoka Rin this time around. Rin’s belly had immediately filled with butterflies, and with a glowing aura surrounding him(one that Sousuke had so kindly called creepy), Rin took a seat and unwrapped the box, lifted the lid off, and found yet another meal of white rice and a single piece of grilled mackerel.
It didn’t bother him the first time, but the second time was a bit confusing and off putting, as was the third. The fourth time, Sousuke had laughed, had a pen thrown at him, and the fifth time, Rin didn’t know what to think anymore.
If what Haruka had said was true, Rin was supposed to be trying different meals each day, not something he had already praised. Despite how amazing it tasted, Rin was getting tired by the time the sixth day rolled around, another piece of grilled mackerel greeting him and making his stomach do a little twist, a total contrast from the butterflies he had first felt.
He and Haruka never ran into each other when it came to Haruka delivering the meal. If Rin were to guess, he would say that Haruka had adjusted his time to the time Rin would go off to make his rounds of the neighborhood. Because of that, Rin wasn’t able to voice a complaint, and didn’t make any special detours to catch Haruka in the act, either.
However, on the day off he had that immediately followed the sixth meal, a sack full of washed up bento boxes on one of his arms, Rin set off from his apartment, Cafe Saba being the only destination he had in his mind. A short train ride and pleasant walk later, he was opening the door to the small building, being overwhelmed with the overbearing scent of cinnamon, sugar, and cleaning products.
This time, more people were in the cafe. That was probably only normal, though, seeing as how it was actually open. Disregarding his mission for a couple of minutes, Rin could only smile, glad he had been wrong the first time he had come here. So it was doing pretty well.
It wasn’t long before his eyes fell on Haruka, standing at a table that seated a man who seemed to be around their age and wore a kind expression, and two young children that were similar to each other in appearance. The four looked plenty familiar with each other from the way they spoke with ease, and how the kids seemed to attach themselves to Haruka and hang off of him.
What really made Rin go dizzy in the head, though, was the gentle and loving smile that Haruka wore towards them. Really, Rin hardly knew the guy, but from what he had gotten, smiles on him were probably a rare occurrence. Especially ones that were that pretty.
A little caught up in the serenity of it, Rin barely noticed when the unknown man noticed Rin staring at them and pointed him out to Haruka. When Haruka turned, Rin gave a small wave, wearing a bashful smile. Haruka nodded once and looked back to the trio, saying something to them before approaching Rin.
“I didn’t think you would come here.”
“Ah, well. I came to return these.” Passing the sack over to Haruka and receiving a small thank you, Rin shifted in his spot, trying to think of how to continue. “And, uh…”
“What?”
Their eyes met but Rin looked away in a rush, brows knitted together. “Listen… The last thing I wanted to do was complain, since you’re giving me these meals for free, but, uh… Is mackerel the only thing you know how to make?”
A stifling silence followed his question, making Rin’s feel as if he had broken out in a cold sweat. Haruka seemed startled at first, but that only dissolved into what Rin could only assume was offense.
“What do you mean…”
“No, it’s like… For the past week, it’s only been mackerel… I thought I was supposed to be a taste tester, but when you only bring me the same thing everyday, I can’t tell you what’s good and what’s not.”
“So the mackerel is bad.”
“I didn’t say that!” Huffing, Rin narrowed his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. “It’s getting boring. That’s all. A normal human being doesn’t survive off of the same thing every single day--”
“I do.”
“Then you’re just weird.”
“I am not.”
Grunting, Rin pinched the bridge of his nose before countering. “If you want to add new things to your menu, then give me more things to approve-- I feel like I’m not aiding you in any way if it’s just like this--”
“I don’t know what you like,” Haruka cut in, turning his head to the side. Rin noticed how his bottom lip jutted out, and his mind went to the word ‘cute’ for a few moments before Haruka was speaking again. “What if I gave you something you’re allergic to? I could kill you.”
“You’re not gonna kill me-- Ugh, seriously… Are you just shy about your cooking or something? A chef shouldn’t be so worried about feeding people... “ He sighed, focusing his gaze on Haruka, not letting it waver. “I mean, thanks for worrying about my life, I guess, but I really would like to feel like I’m helping you out. The same thing just makes it seem like you’re doing it for fun, rather than profit.”
At first, Haruka didn’t say anything. All he did was meet Rin’s eyes with his own and purse his lips, and Rin noticed a twinge of red on Haruka’s cheeks-- Oh, what? Feeling his own heart quiver and a light blush build on his own face, Rin parted his lips to speak, though nothing came out at first.
Finally, he found his voice. “Are you--”
“I’m not.” Haruka hardly let Rin get his question in before interrupting him. “Like I said before, I just don’t know what you like. If you told me, it would help. You said you liked the mackerel, so I just went with it.”
“Oh. Uh.” Clearing his throat, which seemed to have formed an uncomfortable lump, Rin scratched at his cheek in thought. “I… I like meat. And I like spicy things, too… Oh, uh, my mom used to make me pork with ginger a lot… That was always one of my favorites.”
Rin wasn’t sure if Haruka would remember this, but the man seemed to be taking it in and making mental notes, so surely it would be fine. Off the top of his head, Rin couldn’t think of much else, trailing off and shrugging his shoulders when he was done.
“I understand.”
“G-good then.” Stuffing his hands into his pockets, Rin shuffled his feet a little, eyes on the pearly tiles floor beneath them. “Well, uh… That was all I wanted to say, so… I’ll see you later--”
“Do you want a coffee before you leave?” Haruka had turned away from him, heading for the counter. “Black, right?”
“Oh. If you don’t mind--”
“I don’t.”
There was something about Haruka’s blunt way of speaking that should have pissed Rin off, but it didn’t. Under it’s cold exterior, Rin knew that it held something warmer, kinder… Or, he would have liked to have thought that way. It was a habit of his. Making something out of nothing.
But he really felt like there was something. Especially when he accepted the drink, their fingers brushing together, and Rin’s skin tingling at the simple touch. He knew that feeling too well, really, and he thought himself silly for remembering it.
“Thanks, Nanase--”
“Haruka.”
Hesitating, Rin let the name play on the tip of his tongue. “Haruka,” he repeated, a small laugh following. “Haru?”
Haruka nodded and turned his eyes to the counter, his lips drawn into a thin line. “Rin?”
“Yeah.”
Rin grinned at the other, and he didn’t catch the smile that Haruka gave him in return.
--
Complaining to Haruka had been one of Rin’s better decisions, he found. The next time he returned from his rounds to find lunch waiting for him, he hesitated as he opened the box, partly from worry that Haruka hadn’t taken his words to heart, and partly because Sousuke hovered over him in wait.
Laying on a bed of rice, pork that he could easily tell was cooked with ginger awaited him, and he had to stop himself from jumping out of pure joy. Sousuke definitely looked surprise, but only said, “Good for you, Rin.”, before returning to his magazine.
The days that followed were exciting ones for Rin, even if the most prominent part of his day was getting to see what he was having for lunch. Rice balls, sandwiches, noodles-- His meals varied from there on out. One of the more surprising things Haruka had made up for him were the croquettes, which he ended up sharing with Sousuke. He seemed to thoroughly enjoy them, even going as far as to request that Rin tell Haruka to make them more often.
An extra treat was left with the bento at the end of the week. A single raspberry muffin in a little takeout bag sat by his lunch, and despite his distaste for sweets, Rin couldn’t help but eat it anyways. If Haruka was going out of his way to do that for him, he’d take anything.
By the end of the delicious week, Rin was returning to the cafe, another sack of washed bento boxes on his shoulder, and a joyful grin on his face. With a hop in his step, Rin pushed through the door, the little bell jingling again. He wasted no time in going to Haruka, placing the sack on the counter, and bowing.
“Thank you for the meal~,” he said, his voice sounding sing songy.
Haruka nodded, taking the sack and placing it behind the counter, leaning against it a little. There was a spark of curiosity in his eyes. “How was it this week…?”
Rin easily heard the hint of uncertainty in the man’s voice, and watched as Haruka visibly relaxed when he donned a toothy grin. “It was all incredible. My friend and I-- Ah, his name is Yamazaki Sousuke. He’s the other officer who works there. We both really liked the croquettes. He even said you should make more.”
“I’m glad. And I’ll keep it in mind.”
“As for me, I’d really like to have pork kimchi sometime… I’m not really good at making it for myself-- Not to say I can’t, because I definitely can. I just think you’d make it better, right? Oh, and I’d also like to have octopus sausages… Is that silly? I haven’t had those since middle school…”
Rin didn’t notice that he was rambling, too caught up in all the possibilities that his mind could come up with. Haruka didn’t interrupt him, seemingly more content with just listening to Rin chatter on, smiling when a light giggle passed through Rin’s lips. He even placed his chin in his palm, gaze set directly on Rin.
“Also, the muffin was great. I don’t really like sweets, but I enjoyed that--”
“You don’t?” Haruka’s smile disappeared before Rin could even see it properly. “I didn’t realize.”
“Oh, it’s no big deal or anything.” Rin waved his hand, dismissing it. “Like I said, I enjoyed it, so that’s good. If you can make a man who doesn’t like sweet stuff actually look forward to eating it, then I’d say you’ve accomplished something.”
“That’s true.”
“To be honest, it was the first pastry I’ve had in a while… Since I don’t eat sweets, I don’t even know how to make them. Then again, I guess I wouldn’t have to, if I don’t--”
He stopped himself, his cheeks heating up a tad bit. The way he talked on made him sound silly, he was sure, but he felt at ease. Besides, Haruka didn’t seem to mind.
“I could show you,” he said, standing straighter. “If you’d like.”
The thing was, Rin would like that, but it was honestly kind of useless. He didn’t plan on making desserts for himself, and it would be kind of odd to bring treats like that to Sousuke and Kisumi. At the same time, though, he definitely did not want to reject the offer. For him to have hardly spent any time with the man who brought him lunch everyday… Well, it didn’t feel right. Besides, it would be a good opportunity to get to know each other--
“It’s a date.” He hadn’t meant to blurt such a thing out, and his face went warm to the tips of his ears. Even Haruka looked shocked at his words, and Rin had to scramble to correct himself. “No! I mean-- It’s not a date, obviously. It was just a figure of speech! That’s-- Ow!”
He stopped himself as soon as he had bit down on his tongue, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes, wetting his eyelashes. He probably looked pitiful in Haruka’s eyes; like an idiot who couldn’t even speak properly. His face was still warm, too… His chances were probably slimming by this point.
“Alright.”
Everything seemed to still when Rin heard that, and he returned his gaze to Haruka, going slackjaw. Was his heart beating properly? Had he even heard that right? Surely not.
“S-sorry, what?”
“Alright. It’s a date.”
A little light lit within Rin’s heart, as well in the pit of his stomach. Before he could ask Haruka what he meant, the man turned away, and Rin barely caught that the tips of his ears were red as well.
“You have another day off tomorrow, right? Just come here in the afternoon.”
Sparing Rin one more glance, Haruka was gone just a moment later, disappearing into the kitchen, leaving Rin alone in a stunned silence. When he properly gathered everything that had just happened, he lifted a hand to mouth, trembling slightly, his stomach doing flips and twists.
He had to fight to control the urge to let out a whoop of victory in the middle of the cafe.
--
Staying true to what Haruka had suggested, Rin arrived at the cafe around five the next day. He didn’t immediately go in, though, deciding to instead lean against the front of the building to try and will his heart to calm down. The air was getting chillier as night began to fall, but his entire body felt warm and tingly.
Their odd exchange from the day before still lingered in the back of Rin’s mind, and he had hardly slept that night, Haruka’s words repeating themselves constantly. A date… Really, he probably hadn’t meant it like a normal date. Maybe he had just been going along with Rin, just trying to spare him the embarrassment from the situation.
Biting down on his lower lip, Rin checked his wristwatch, watching as the larger hand ticked away as the seconds passed. Haruka was probably wondering where he was. He couldn’t leave the other waiting.
With that, Rin inhaled deeply, slapped his cheeks, and headed into the cafe. Haruka wasn’t in sight, so he took that small amount of time he had alone to check his appearance in the window’s glossy reflection. Really, he had already spent a solid thirty minutes that day making sure he looked alright. Combed hair, pearly white teeth, the nicest but most casual clothes he owned…
“Rin?”
Nearly jumping out of his skin, Rin turned to Haruka, who watched him with an odd look, head tilted. Feeling the blood rush to his cheeks, Rin fixed his posture, coughing into his fist. “Uh. How long have you been there.”
“How long have you been admiring yourself.”
“I won’t answer that.”
“Then I won’t either.”
Rin snorted, feeling the tension melt away when he saw Haruka smile at him. Going up to the other, wearing a grin of his own, he followed Haruka when he turned and headed for the kitchen.
It was clean, very well kept, and smelled faintly of air freshener. Leaning against the closed door, Rin waited as Haruka dug in a drawer, bringing out two aprons, tossing the pink one to Rin. Putting it on with a flurry of excitement resting in his chest, Rin reached around to tie it, fumbling with the strings.
“Uh…”
“I’ll help.”
Accepting the offer, Rin turned away from Haruka, feeling a shiver go down his spine when the man’s fingers brushed against his back. There was the fabric of Rin’s shirt between them, of course, so Rin immediately felt silly for having that kind of reaction, but it wasn’t like he could help it.
Once both were in their respective aprons and Rin had tied his hair back, having caught Haruka staring at him while doing so, Rin propped himself against the counter, watching as Haruka brought out ingredients for whatever they were making. Butter, sugar, eggs, bowls, spoons-- Rin soon lost interest in them, more focused on actually getting to the baking part.
“You know, this is still pretty weird,” he mumbled, his smile wry when Haruka gave him a questioning look. “I mean, I already told you I don’t like sweets, so for me to be making them…”
“It’s fine to learn something new,” Haruka countered, stepping away from the ingredients. “So just go with it.”
“Yeah, yeah… What are we making, anyways.”
“Cookies--”
“Heh. Basic.”
“Shut up.”
Giggling quietly, Rin ran his fingers through his hair, pushing his bangs back. Haruka’s pout was something that was awfully adorable. “Well, I’ll follow your lead. Just tell me whatever I need to do.”
Even though he said that, and even though Haruka had acknowledged it, Rin was hardly asked to do anything. Really, he actually felt like he had put on the apron for nothing, since all he did was watch Haruka work. He didn’t mind too much, though. The way the other man’s eyes would narrow, or how his brows would draw together in concentration… It was a nice little show. Rin couldn’t even keep his eyes off of Haruka’s hands, his fingers especially. Slender and long and beautiful…
He was getting a little too caught up in his racing imagination. With his chin resting in his palm and his fingers drumming against the counter, he silently watched as Haruka put the first batch into the oven, wiping his hands on the blue apron.
“So…” he started, “Am I supposed to be taking notes or something? I mean, I thought we were supposed to be doing this together, but…”
Holding Haruka’s gaze, Rin bristled when the other scoffed. “You might ruin them.”
“Huh? What? Sorry, what?” Pushing himself off the counter, Rin crossed his arms over his chest, brows knitting together and putting a crease in his forehead, a tiny scowl forming on his lips. “Ruin them? If you think I’ll ruin them, then what am I even here for?”
He didn’t give Haruka a chance to respond, maneuvering around him and heading towards one of the unused mixing bowls, a sack of flour sitting in it. There was no way he could ruin goddamn cookies. Those were one of the easiest things to make, right? Rin could handle himself just fine!
Glancing back at Haruka, his gaze fervent and determined, Rin grabbed the sack. He’d show Haruka-- No, his cookies would be better, he bet.
“Wait, Rin--”
Not heeding whatever warning Haruka was going to give him, Rin picked the flour up, only to be blinded by a cloud of white just seconds later. Stumbling back as the sack fell to the floor and burst, he fell into Haruka, who grabbed him by his arms, both coughing as the substance flooded the floor and air around them.
It was a good minute before the room cleared, everything a total mess. Rin only stood in shocked silence, feeling sick to his stomach. Well, rather than making cookies, he had forged a recipe for absolute chaos. A chaos that would probably get him kicked out.
Haruka had been right. He did ruin it. This sort of date was going to shambles because of him and his goddamn competitive streak--
The corners of his eyes stung and he moved to lean against an opposite counter, away from Haruka, who hadn’t said one word. Rin wondered just how pissed he was. His kitchen was a wreck, all due to a frisky policeman with no sense of… Well, just no sense. Lower lip trembling, Rin turned to him, but didn’t lift his gaze.
He had honestly wanted whatever this was to go well. He had honestly wanted whatever they had to go well. Parting his lips and cursing himself in silence when his voice cracked, he spoke. “Haru, I’m so sorry. I didn’t--”
A snort interrupted him, followed by a wheezy laugh. Lifting his head, bafflement replacing his shame, his jaw fell when he saw Haruka’s back turned to him, the man’s shoulders shaking and him leaning over the counter. In an instant, Rin’s heartbeat sped up and his breath hitched in his throat. His cheeks flared in what he was sure was a brilliant red color, completely entranced by whatever the amazing sight before him was.
It was obvious Haruka was trying to hold his laughter in, and when he finally turned to Rin, wearing a smile that Rin could only describe as stunning, he almost seemed ready to start in again. He moved closer and Rin felt as if he were glued to the floor, his whole body tensing when Haruka was right in front of him.
Rin hadn’t even realized how much of a mess they were themselves. Almost his entire front was covered in the powdery substance, making him as white as a ghost. Haruka had only a bit in his hair; he had been protected by Rin’s body.
“You look awful.” Rin’s eyes followed Haruka’s hand as it grabbed the end of his own apron, lifting the material up to wipe the flour from one of Rin’s cheeks, exposing the flaming blush that was hidden underneath. Haruka’s expression shifted into something that seemed awestruck, allowing his gaze to lock with Rin’s.
The silence was thick, and Rin realized Haruka was probably waiting for him to say something, but his mind was totally blank. All he could think of was how dazzling Haruka’s laugh had been, how incredible his smile was...
In a daze, Rin leaned in closer, hearing Haruka’s breath hitch, and his did the same when he caught himself. His hands gripped the counter until his knuckles turned white, and he stared into the depths of Haruka’s eyes with his own, closer than he had ever been to them before. Both were as still as the air around them, not daring to move.
Rin could feel Haruka’s breath on his lips, making his entire body break out into a cold sweat, and he had to wonder, just what was he trying to pull here? Kissing on the first date that wasn’t actually a date? Rin knew he could be pretty impulsive sometimes, but--
Anything Rin had been thinking disappeared when he saw Haruka’s eyes close, felt him move closer, their mouths pressing together in something short and chaste, something that left Rin wanting much, much more.
But he didn’t dare let that sentiment be known. All he could do was gawk at Haruka, and feel how his heart seemed to glow. Something had to be said. “Um…”
Good start.
Haruka drew his lips into a thin line, turning his head to the side. “You looked like you wanted to. Sorry.”
“Oh. Really?” No, no, that wasn’t right either. A laugh, high pitched and a tad manic sounding, left Rin, and he covered his mouth, speaking through his fingers. “No. Uh, I did. Like, I really wanted to. Kiss you, that is. But, like, how was I supposed to know if that was right? It’s only been, what, a month? Since we met? And I didn’t know if you were gay or not--”
“I’m not.”
“My point!” Rin stopped himself at that, flushed. “But you kissed me first.”
“...Yeah.”
“Did you want to kiss me?”
When Haruka didn’t respond, Rin shook his head, hesitating before placing his hands on Haruka’s shoulders. He leaned in, cursed when their noses bumped together, but managed to rest his lips on Haruka’s once more. The kiss wasn’t graceful, both of them were stiff, but for Rin, it was enough.
Haruka seemed pleased, too, pulling away with a sigh that lingered on Rin’s skin. Holding one another’s gaze, a few beats passed, and then Haruka was out of Rin’s grasp, stating that he was going to get the mop.
He left Rin alone in the kitchen, and returned to find Rin on the floor with his knees pulled up to his chest, head buried in his arms. It peeved Rin a little when Haruka didn’t ask if he was alright, or how he felt about everything, but they would have to talk about it at some later point, right?
All Rin did was listen to the water slosh on the floor, and at one point he peeked up, sneezing immediately as something tickled his nose. Right. He was still covered in flour. Looking up at Haruka, he sneered when the other said something about him looking like a begging puppy, but happily accepted the spare change of clothes Haruka offered him.
“Why do you have something like this in a cafe--”
“I sleep here sometimes.”
“Wow. Dedicated.”
Snug in the new outfit, Rin accepted the plastic bag that held his other clothes, grinning sheepishly. Already wearing each other’s shirts? Pants? Things sure were moving quickly.
When the kitchen was clean again and the first batch of cookies were done, both sat down at one of the tables in the cafe, Rin thinking that they probably wouldn’t be trying for a second batch anytime soon.
“So…” He trailed off, waiting to see if Haruka would say something, but nothing came. “What do we do now?”
“I don’t know.”
“Ah…”
Looking to the plate between them, Rin grabbed one of the cookies for himself, taking a reluctant bite and feeling a little surprised when it almost seemed to melt on his tongue. It was pleasant enough, even if sweets still weren’t his thing.
“You know, you said you were going to teach me how to make sweets, but I learned nothing.” He snickered when Haruka furrowed his brows and looked away, wearing a pout. “Was there a point?”
When Haruka didn’t answer immediately, Rin reached over and poked at the man’s cheek, trying to elicit something from him. Haruka only brushed Rin’s hand away, but he did talk.
“There… There really wasn’t…”
“So this was useless?”
“No.”
Rin grinned, saying that he had only been joking. “I’m glad I agreed. Thanks, Haru.”
“...For what.”
“I don’t know.”
Taking another cookie for himself, Rin praised Haruka on their taste, putting on a cheeky grin that Haruka couldn’t help but return. For an hour after that, the two men merely chatted with each other, and despite Rin’s earlier wishes, talking about the kiss didn’t come up. He ended up not minding so much, though. Getting to hear Haruka talk about himself, about how he had lived in Iwatobi his entire life, about how cooking had always been a passion of his, was much better.
When Rin decided it was time that he leave, even if he didn’t exactly want to, he struggled as he stood on the sidewalk with Haruka in front of him. Another kiss wouldn’t hurt, but it also wasn’t necessary, and it would probably be really weird, too.
Finally, he decided on a stiff hug that Haruka very hesitantly returned, and he was off a moment later, saying his goodbyes to Haruka as he hurried away and turned a corner, leaning against a wall and putting a hand to his heart.
That had simultaneously been the best and worst first date he had ever been on-- All he felt was an overwhelming sense of joy, and by the time he reached home and fell onto his bed, he was just plain giddy.
Thinking about Haruka only made him giggle, made him feel like he was in middle school for the second time in his life. A young man and his crush.
All that excitement wore him down, and when he woke at noon the next day, he noted that it was the first time in a while that he had slept so soundly.
--
The first week after that night had gone as it would normally would, except for Sousuke noticing a change in Rin’s attitude and disposition. How he walked with a hop in his step, how his voice sounded dreamy and far off at times, how pink his face got when he ate one of the lunches that Haruka would drop off for him.
His mood only got better as spring came upon them, the sakura trees blooming to life with their pink petals. The air was getting warmer, as warm as Rin’s chest felt one day when he returned from his rounds to find Haruka sitting in the police box with Sousuke, bento in hand.
“Haru?” Removing his hat, Rin beamed, surprised but not complaining. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”
“A change of routine,” Haruka murmured, beckoning for Rin to sit down. Doing as he was told, Rin uttered a thank you as he accepted the bento, unwrapping the cloth.
“Ah!” The insides brightened him up further, if that were even possible at this point. Among the various foods, sat cutely cut sausages, little holes poked in the tops to mimic eyes. “You did it! Octopus sausages!”
Not containing his excitement for a mere second, Rin looked to Haruka with shimmering eyes, but lost his smile when he heard Sousuke snicker at him from his desk. Turning a glare on his friend, Rin stuck his tongue out, making sure to let a “Bleh!” noise accompany it.
His attention was quickly back on Haruka, though, when the other man touched his hand. His smile returning, Rin nodded and bowed his head. “Thank you for the meal.”
It was the first time he sat and had his lunch with Haruka, and he was afraid that he’d miss it when their routine returned to normal. Maybe it would happen again-- He could definitely hope. And he hoped it would be somewhere more private, someplace that didn’t have Sousuke’s wandering eyes on them at all times.
When he finished, he thanked Haruka again, standing with the man and glancing in Sousuke’s direction. “Uh… I’m going to walk him back to the cafe-- Make sure he gets there safely.”
His true intentions were obvious, and Sousuke knew that. He could read Rin like a book, even if Rin didn’t like it sometimes. Leaning on his desk, Sousuke looked between the two men and snorted, waving them off.
“Hurry back. You have actual police officer things to do.”
“I know that.” Huffing, Rin peered at Haruka, a smile growing as he took the other out of the police box.
“You don’t have to.” Haruka tried to reason that he was fine walking back on his own, but Rin would have none of it.
Giving up, Haruka went along with Rin, matching his stride as they began their short journey to the cafe. They were silent for the most part, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. The breeze that blew around them shook the tree branches and, at times, scattered cherry blossom petals onto the pavement. Rin, as he usually did, got caught up in watching them, even pausing to admire one tree and how beautifully it had bloomed.
“It’s pretty, isn’t it?” he spoke, not tearing his eyes away from the petals. “Spring is my favorite season… I’d like to go to a viewing…”
“We could.”
Rin’s heart leapt as he looked to Haruka, eyes wide. “For real?”
“Yeah. My friends and I go every year.”
“A-ah…”
Visibly wilting at the idea of it being a group outing, Rin rubbed the back of his neck, his cheeks going warm when he heard Haruka snort.
“Unless you’d rather go on another date.”
“Oh.” He really was too obvious. Trying to bite back a smile, he failed, and eagerly agreed to the offer. “Yeah. Yeah, I’d like that-- Wait, another? Was our first date really the other night?”
“You were the one who said it was.”
Well, Haruka wasn’t wrong. Turning his gaze to his feet, Rin shifted, lower lip jutting out as he thought about it. “Uh… I mean, it didn’t seem very much like a first date-- Like, did it really go that well?”
Rin himself had definitely enjoyed it, but when he thought of first dates, he thought of something way more romantic. Going out to dinner, or a movie, or walking along the beach-- Not making a mess of someone else’s kitchen and then kissing them on a whim.
Thinking back on it, Rin didn’t notice when Haruka moved closer to him, and stiffened when the other’s hand brushed at his cheek. Their eyes locked again, and Rin wondered how many times they had stared at each other like this before, but he wasn’t given much time to try and remember.
Accepting the kiss that Haruka gave him, sighing as their lips glided over each other and seemed to fit perfectly together, he leaned into it, eyes fluttering closed. He allowed Haruka to cup his face, noticing that his hands were much warmer and softer than he had ever imagined.
It felt shorter than Rin had wanted, almost chasing after Haruka’s lips with his own when the kiss ended. Immediately giggling out of either nerves or happiness, Rin glanced away, a dopey smile forming.
“I thought it did,” Haruka told him, wearing a smile of his own as he pulled away from Rin, beginning to walk forward. “And I’m sure the future ones will, too.”
Gazing after Haruka, Rin didn’t think about catching up until Haruka turned to him, extending his hand out towards Rin. Losing all of his words, Rin swallowed thickly, shyly took his hand, and allowed their fingers to be laced together, walking alongside the smiling man with his heart fluttering.
Rin didn’t remember too well what his first love had been like; he could only recall that it had ended messily.
But he knew one thing for certain.
Without a doubt, no matter what, he would always, always, treasure his second.