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There were facts in the universe (and on the campus) that were generally agreed on. That the earth revolved around the sun. That some professors were probably directed related to Satan himself. That a movie with the Black Widow in the lead was long overdue. That the result of one plus one was indeed two. That Frozen, as a movie, was overrated but that the soundtrack had been pretty cool. That it was a mystery why Grandine Marvell was dating Metalicana Redfox instead of Igneel Dragneel when Igneel was the embodiment of a good boy while Metalicana was a rebel. That it was generally getting colder in the winter and warmer in the summer. That Taylor Swift’s newest album was actually really good and that life was too short to claim otherwise.
Those were all facts that could be proven – just like the one that Silver Fullbuster’s coat was absolutely ridiculous and that it was a minor miracle that no one had set it on fire so far.
The coat was old-fashioned but this was hardly the problem as a large fraction of the students all went to the local thrift shops weekly to see if they could get some vintage clothes. The problem was not even the colour – it was in a dark shade of grey and even the cut would not be much of an issue. No, the problem was the way the coat was gigantic and although Silver Fullbuster was hardly a dainty flower, it dwarfed him which was pretty ridiculous.
The list of people who had pointed this out to him was long. It had started with Cornelia Alberona who had coincidentally also been the first to be confronted with the atrocity and it had continued with Gildarts Clive who had not been also to stop laughing when he had seen it. Ur Frost, Silver’s girlfriend, had reportedly refused to be seen anywhere with him while he was wearing the coat for a full week before she had surrendered as this measure had not shown any effect whatsoever.
And now, after Silver had started to wear the coat in late October, it was the beginning of December and snowfall had set in – and by now, no one was still flinching at the monstrosity of a piece of clothing that looked like it it had devoured the business student.
And because it was an extraordinary cold winter, even Ur Frost who had the widely used nickname of Frostbite was freezing as she left her last class of the day. As she was more on the short side, she looked rather ridiculous all bundled up but in her red jacket, she was easily recognisable even though she had pulled her knitted hat into her face to protect her skin from the biting winds.
“In my next life,” she said – her voice muffled by the scarf she had wrapped around the lower half of her face – as she looked at her boyfriend, “I’ll pick a university farther south.”
“You keep saying this, Bambi, but I doubt that you’d actually go through with it,” Silver replied as he withdrew his arms from the sleeves to turn the coat into something that nearly looked like a cloak. “You like winter, you like it when it’s cold – that’s why you date someone cold-hearted like me.”
She did not reply but he was nearly sure that he could spot red dots on her face, dots that were not connected to the biting cold around them. “You’re probably right,” she said after a moment as she rubbed her gloved against each other to gain some warmth. “But, hell, this is the coldest winter in a long time.”
“Hence I am so happy about my coat,” he replied before he stopped behind her as they waited for the stream of cars to stop so they could cross the street. “But since I’m a good boyfriend, I’ll share the coat with you even though you badmouthed it,” he declared before he pulled her against his chest and closed the coat again. “Can you breathe, Bambi?”
“Yes, I can breathe,” she replied, her voice even more muffled than beforehand, “but I can’t see and if you walk me into a lamppost, I’ll murder you and plead self-defence.”
“Shouldn’t you be threatening to break up with me?” he asked as he lifted her up and rested her feet atop of his own. “Directly going with murder seems a bit drastic – even for you.”
“Yeah, because the last time we broke up worked so well for either of us,” she replied with a huff and it was in her voice that she was rolling her eyes at him. “Murder seems to be the better option in my humble opinion.”
They did not talk much about the time they had broken up as the consequences of a horrible (and actually rather stupid) misunderstanding because it was something that did not require much talking about because they had been over this quite a few times – especially with their friends who had been worried that something like this might happen again and that they would have to suffer from it all over again.
“If you put it into perspective like this, I’m inclined to agree,” he replied before laughter shook his body. “Lookie look, Clive’s headed our way … that’s gonna be fun.”
“You are horrible,” she sighed but a part of her was quite interested in how this scene would play out because although neither of them would ever willingly admit it, they were friends.
“Once again, just consider what this says about you, dear,” he replied as he tightened his grip around her body and walked them across the street. “Hello, Clive,” he greeted in an exaggeratedly cheerful voice. “How are you today?”
“Fullbuster,” Gildarts replied calmly before he paused to look at the other man intently. “Aren’t you supposed to be carrying heavy stuff for Ur right now?”
“Technically, I am,” Silver said before he nearly doubled over in pain when Ur’s elbow connected with his stomach. “But look, Clive – I turned into a mutant with four legs,” he said and inside the coat, Ur was rolling her eyes once again at her boyfriend’s antics. “You think Professor X will come to recruit me?”
“Well, one pair of those legs seems pretty useless to me because it’s far too short for you,” Gildarts replied drily before he chuckled. “You two really dig this winter thing, right?”
Ur pulled the coat aside so that her head poked out and she frowned at her best friend. “Gildarts,” she started before she was interrupted by her boyfriend who tsk-ed disapprovingly.
“You’re tiny,” he declared, “you need to stay inside the shell or you’ll get sick and die.”
She rolled her eyes at him before she mentioned at her head that was covered by her usual knitted hat, one that had likely been a present from one of her relatives. “Did you hear what he brought back from his trip north?” she asked, her voice trapped between amusement and genuine frustration.
“He actually showed me,” the red-haired man replied, barely able to contain his laughter.
“I wear the same kind of hat, Bambi, it would have been a matching set,” Silver said as he patted his own head that was covered by a fur hat in the style some armies used and that had the tendency to make the wearer feel like his brain was being boiled inside his skull.
“Yes and I said that I don’t need these things on my head because I got northern blood,” she said with a scoff that masked a hint of softness regarding the way he cared. “Cold can’t kill me.”
“Hence the nickname Frostbite,” Gildarts said with a nod as he grinned widely. “God, someone should take a picture of you two in the coat. Maybe people will stop hating on it.”
“The people who hate on the coat are uncultured fools – well, aside from Bambi, I suppose,” Silver said, narrowly dodging the bullet he had fired at himself. “She’s just oblivious.”
“Jeez, you’re on a roll today,” Ur said as she rolled her eyes at him once again. “But let’s get going – we really have a lot planned for today and I made dinner reservations for seven.”
“You two are adorable,” Cornelia decided as she appeared on Gildarts’ side, wrapped into more scarves than a single person ever should be wearing at once and grinning widely at them. “Seriously – I start to like the coat idea.”
“Traitor,” Ur replied with a scoff but her eyes did not match her voice’s sharpness.
“Found it in that thrift shop – it was really cheap,” Silver said with a wide grin.