Work Text:
Kakashi was glad he saw all the lights out at the house. He didn’t want to alarm his boyfriend and Obito was a rather heavy sleeper. So he opened the bathroom window, thankful for the other’s forgetfulness and leaving it open for the night, and slipped right in. The thud he made as he landed on the tiles was a bit too loud for his liking but as he stayed still and listened in for any sounds from the other rooms, he deduced Obito had to be fast asleep.
He didn’t want to bother him, but more importantly, he didn’t want to be discovered in his current state. Kakashi turned on the lights around the mirror hanging above the sink and sighed. He fetched two bloody knives from his pants’ back pocket and threw them into the porcelain bowl. Though before he turned the water on, he spotted a few specks of blood on the tap. He huffed with a smile and shook his head. Obito was so sloppy sometimes, unlike him.
They’d been living together for a year now and it was a miracle the Uchiha hadn’t found out about his profession yet. At the same time, Obito had his own secrets to hide, but he wasn’t the best at hiding his tracks. Kakashi knew his boyfriend was more or less in the same field.
One way or another, they both killed people.
Kakashi was a contracted assassin, getting rid of grudges, witnesses, enemies, rivals… Whoever his clients wanted gone. He never judged them, unless they wanted him to kill a child or an animal. Perhaps some would laugh at his skewed morality code but he had a few iron rules he’d never break. He’d get a job roughly once per month. It gave him enough time to stalk the targets, learn of their daily patterns and finally catch them at their most vulnerable.
All his kills were swift, silent and clean. He hated making a mess and getting rid of it even more. That was why he barely could hold back with his knowledge of what Obito was doing.
Unlike him, his boyfriend wasn’t doing it for a living. He had a normal nine-to-five job as an assistant at a flower shop. He earned enough to maintain the house they shared and didn’t mind Kakashi pretending to do freelance work and sleep for half a day while he’d be away. After all, he couldn’t know Kakashi was sneaking out almost every night to do recon for his second, actual job.
Obito had no connections to the mafia, he wasn’t even sure how to contact an assassin should he ever want to. His weapons of choice were normal house objects, he’d never think about buying a gun. But the biggest difference was that he did it for himself. He killed people who wronged him. He’d never leave his grudges to anyone else, teaching the cruel lesson to them firsthand.
Kakashi, being a murderer himself, could tolerate a lot of things. But even a single drop of blood left behind irked him and so he quickly wiped the crimson liquid with toilet paper and flushed it down. He carried on with washing his tools and took out a towel hidden as deep as possible in the bathroom cupboard. It was purple in color, so any leftover blood he’d wipe from the weapons wouldn’t be too visible. Being overly cautious as he was, though, Kakashi folded it neatly and put right back in, behind all the other towels they used regularly.
There could be never any blood in the house. Kakashi was too perfect for it. All his targets would die or be muffled before they could scream. Their bodies would be dumped into an incinerator or water before they’d bleed. He would never allow himself to have any witnesses.
So seeing Obito’s sloppy work, he had to often squash the irritation bubbling up within him. He cleaned up after his boyfriend’s latest murder spree without a word, noticing pinkish sediment around the drain in the bathtub. He did let out an exasperated sigh, however, knowing no one would hear him.
He loved Obito, he really did. Perhaps knowing that Obito was capable of killing people made Kakashi fall for him even more. But Kakashi had his own job to upkeep, his earnings didn’t come from the fake freelance work he lied about after all. And so he had no choice but to check the entire house for any potential hints of at least one murderer living there.
If Obito’s latest victim was someone from the vicinity, they might get questioned by the police soon. Depending on how soon the disappearance is noted - or if Obito had bothered to hide the body well enough. Kakashi had almost choked his boyfriend when a corpse had been discovered in their neighbourhood barely one day after Obito had killed them. Kakashi had to let go, eventually, knowing he had to feign ignorance to his beloved’s actions and pretend he didn’t know how to do that better.
Once the bathroom was all cleaned up and Kakashi didn’t find anything suspicious laying around in the house, he could finally go to bed. It was almost 5 AM and the tiredness was settling in. He gently opened the bedroom door and a smile crept upon his face as he saw Obito sprawled out on the bed, mouth hanging open and his shirt rolled up, exposing his stomach. He was snoring quietly and sometimes his right foot would twitch - a sign he was dreaming.
Kakashi took off his clothes and folded them neatly to slide under the bed. He’d sort everything out once Obito would leave for work. For now, he was too tired to do any more cleaning and just wanted to sleep. It took some effort to fight for his own spot on the bed and his boyfriend’s sleeping form was heavier than usual but eventually, Obito allowed Kakashi to move him around. He quickly threw one arm over Kakashi and mumbled something in his sleep, pulling him closer.
Kakashi found himself smiling at the subconscious hug and welcomed Obito’s heat. He might’ve made him do house chores in the middle of the night but in the end, the cuddling was worth it. And so he nuzzled into Obito’s chest and closed his eyes, drifting off to sleep.
“Did you hear? The guy working at the barber shop across the street from where I work, he went missing.”
Kakashi was busy chopping up some vegetables for the stew and he barely heard Obito’s words through the sizzling on the pan. He just made a small sound of confirmation, not really paying attention to the announcement.
“Isn’t that scary how some people just disappear in this city…” Obito continued his rather obvious mumbling.
Kakashi could feel his gaze on his back and chuckled, knowing the other wanted any sort of response. It was simply adorable how Obito could pretend he had nothing to do with the disappearances. What puzzled Kakashi, however, was the reason why he’d bring his attention to it. Perhaps to act normal, maybe he thought non-murderers talked about such things with terror in their eyes. They probably did but Kakashi couldn’t be bothered to put up an act as well.
“Well, as long as you don’t suddenly disappear on me, I’m fine.” He threw all the cut up onions on the pan and stirred them a few times. “Did you know him?”
“Ah, you know, you shouldn’t shit-talk de--” Obito nearly bit his tongue trying not to finish the sentence and Kakashi had to look away to hide his snicker. “Absent people. But he was sort of an asshole.”
“You don’t sound apologetic at all.”
Kakashi’s comment earned him a slightly suspicious stare.
“Why should I? He wasn’t too nice about the fact I have a boyfriend.”
Kakashi closed his eyes and hummed. So that was it, then. He felt flattered, in a way. To think Obito would go so far without stopping his angry outbursts to defend their relationship.
“I have a feeling he won’t be coming back, then.”
He could feel he was stepping on very thin ice. Obito was mulling over his choice of words and eyeing him with more and more suspicion.
“Why?”
“All the missing people turn up dead, eventually.” Kakashi wasn’t sure why he put the emphasis on the last word. But when he received no more questions from his boyfriend, he turned his focus back to the cooking.
With all the cooking sounds, he couldn’t hear Obito get up from the chair, slowly stalk up to him. But he did notice out of the corner of his eye him grabbing something - a knife, perhaps. The shadow looming over Kakashi told him what the other was trying to do.
Kakashi huffed out the tiniest sigh and swiftly turned around, his hands immediately stopping Obito’s wrists. The knife hung above his head, held with both hands, and his boyfriend looked at him with both surprise and disdain.
“What are you doing?” Kakashi asked cooly, not a single hint of panic on his face. He didn’t think he’d given himself away yet. But he already moved his feet to block Obito’s chance of escaping too quickly. He could only hope the other wasn’t as skilled in fights and wouldn’t find that movement suspicious.
“You know, don’t you?” Obito narrowed his eyes. His arms shook a bit, maybe he was still hesitating whether he wanted to hurt his boyfriend or not.
Kakashi couldn’t help but pity that kind of attitude. He also found it cute and cursed just how much love he could feel for the hopeless murderer. It didn’t take him much struggle to get the knife out of Obito’s hands; Kakashi had to disarm various bodyguards regularly at work.
“Of course I do.” He prefered to stay vague, to see if they were both on the same page. It was a slim chance but perhaps they could slip back to their oblivious silly life. “I’ve known since day one.”
Obito blinked two times in surprise, not quite understanding why the knife slipped out of his hold so easily. He couldn’t move his arms freely anymore, Kakashi’s fingers wrapping around his wrists and holding him in place.
“You know I can’t let you go like this, then.”
Kakashi had to physically stop himself from snickering by turning his head to the side for a moment. Knowing Obito’s modus operandi, the unelegant ways he chose to kill… He couldn’t take a threat from him seriously.
“Why not? Because I’ll run out screaming? Call the police?”
If his calm tone was anything to go by, Obito was slowly understanding he wasn’t dealing with someone he’d taken Kakashi for. The confusion wasn’t leaving his face, he was lost as to why his boyfriend wouldn’t be scared of him if he knew the truth.
“How can I believe you that you won’t?”
Kakashi shook his head. It was ridiculous but the conversation was bound to happen sooner or later. Taking advantage of still holding Obito’s wrists, he pulled him in and as the other stumbled, he connected their lips in a brief kiss.
“Because, first, I love you,” he whispered and his lips quirked in a smile.
Obito looked too adorable for his own good. Any killing intent he might have had a moment ago was completely gone and he stared at Kakashi like a lost puppy. Neither of them said anything concrete but Kakashi knew he had to break the ice. The first step of showing his acceptance of his lover’s actions had been taken.
He easily walked past Obito, holding his wrists to lead him towards the bedroom. He leaned in, his lips touching Obito’s ear.
“And second, I’ve killed much more people than you.”
Although Obito’s expression was still puzzled, there was a glint of intrigue in his eyes now. Kakashi’s smile had to be contagious.
The dinner could wait. In a way, Kakashi was saving his relationship. His life, too, but he wasn’t worried about that as much.
“If you don’t believe me, I can show you the collection of guns I keep under the bed, silly.”
Obito seemed to be pretty convinced already because as soon as they stepped into the bedroom, he finally freed his wrists and wrapped his arms around Kakashi, kissing him much harder than his boyfriend had in the kitchen.
“I didn’t think I could love you even more.”